It's All Funfairs And Games
"A little to the left."
"No, you need to go to the right – and back it up a little."
"'Back it up a little'? You know what this is, right, Carter?"
"I said you needed to go left!"
"Uh… the other left, sir."
"This is a most ineffective strategy."
"Whoa! T! You can't do that buddy!"
"On the contrary, O'Neill."
"Teal'c!"
"Umm, Daniel? I think you should take Teal'c –"
"Oh, for cryin' out loud! Carter! Daniel! Someone!Help me out here before we get in trouble!"
"Yes, sir."
"Teal'c? Why don't we just go and –"
"We have an objective to fulfil here first, Daniel Jackson."
"I know, Teal'c, but there's a certain… etiquette when it comes to this sort of thing."
"Apparently."
"Jack! I'm trying to help!"
"Well help a little faster then, someone's coming! And Carter?"
"Yes, Sir?"
"Stop smirking."
"Yes, sir."
"Okay, Teal'c, can you... Look, can you just come away from the machine and then I'll explain, please?"
"Very well, Daniel Jackson."
With a loud crash, Teal'c let the large claw machine fall back into its original position, from where he had started to tip it to one side. As an exasperated Daniel slowly led their teammate to the far end of the arcade, Jack and Sam shared a relieved look.
He sighed loudly. "Remind me why we're here again?"
"Teal'c wanted to attend the fair. We missed it last year because of our trip to Netu, remember?"
"Ah, yes," he grimaced. "How could I forget?"
Sam flashed him a sympathetic smile, before her attention drifted towards their friends as they queued for more tokens.
"Oh, come on!" Jack growled, causing his second-in-command to spin around to face him.
"What's wrong?" she asked, glancing around as if a threat of some kind had suddenly appeared.
"Look at that! Well, that's just ruined everything," Jack replied dramatically.
Frowning, Sam stepped closer and let her gaze fall to where he was pointing. She couldn't help but smirk. The colonel had spent the previous ten minutes at the claw machine, pulling the lever back and forward, left and right, in an attempt to get the claw into the right position. He'd almost perfected it, only for Teal'c to seemingly grow tired of waiting – which is what led him to step up to the machine and tip it backwards. As a result, all of the items inside had moved around – including the one her CO had been trying to win.
"I did say you were taking too long. All you had to do was move it to the right."
She immediately regretted her response as Jack leveled a glare at her and, deciding she needed to do something quickly to get back into his good books, walked to the other side of the machine, and paused for a moment as her eyes roamed over the prizes and the position of the claw. Moving back to his side, she gestured to the levers.
"May I?"
He smirked. "Be my guest."
Minutes later, the claw had been repositioned and Sam stood back from the machine. "It's the best I can do, sir."
Eyeing her warily, Jack stepped into her personal space before gesturing to the machine. They both turned and he hit the red retrieve button positioned beside the levers. Sam held her breath as the mechanics in the machine clunked and the claw slowly made its way towards the prizes below. She closed her eyes and silently berated herself for not being able to watch. It was a claw machine.
She didn't need to worry however, as the colonel's crowed "YES!" soon told her everything she needed to know and seconds later, she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her waist before she was lifted off the ground. Letting out an uncharacteristic yelp, Sam felt the world spin, and the scent that she classified as 'uniquely Jack' invaded her senses. Opening her eyes, she realized the colonel was indeed spinning her around in circles – and they were attracting more and more attention as time passed.
"Ah, sir?" she said breathlessly. "Could you… put me down? Please?"
She felt her feet touch the ground and as she tried to regain her equilibrium, he placed his lips next to her ear.
"You're amazing, Carter!"
With that, he removed his arms from her waist and turned back to the machine and Sam watched with amusement as he crouched down and reached into the tray that sat beneath the controls. A burst of laughter escaped her, but whether that was due to the colonel's expression, or his newly acquired prize, she wasn't sure. For there, in his hand, was a plush Homer Simpson toy, wearing nothing but a pair of white boxers with 'D'oh!' written on the rear.
"Happy now, Sir?" She asked with a smile.
Jack beamed in return. "You betcha! Homer's the only one I needed to complete my collection!"
Author's Note: This was initially written - as a joke - for 'Plush Animal Lover's Day', which takes place on 28 October.