Title: Very Happy Meal
Author: kira
Rating/Genre(s): OT, romance/crack!
Word Count: 679
Warning(s): cougarish activities
Summary: Hojo meets Kagome's mom at WacDonald's for the start of their date…
888
Rumiko Higurashi stood outside the WacDonald's, waiting for her teenaged boyfriend to show up for their date. Glancing at her watch, she noted much to her dismay that she was fifteen minutes early. Sighing, Rumiko decided to wait for him inside, lest one her friends spot her just as Hojo was approaching. She walked up to the entrance, and taking a deep breath, she pulled open the door and stepped inside.
"Higurashi-san!" Hojo said as he walked over to her. "I'm glad you could make it." He smiled at her, melting her heart.
"Hojo-kun," she replied, resisting the urge to tussle his hair in public. Slowly undressing him with her eyes, Rumiko sighed softly as she remembered the fun they had in her living room, before Souta and her father-in-law came back from baseball practice.
"I thought maybe we should go order…?"
"Ummm… yeah…"
"My friend, Yamato-san, is working today and he promised to treat us well."
"He did?" Rumiko said, a hint of surprise in her voice. "He won't get in trouble, will he?"
"No. His father's the manger, it'll be alright." Hojo grinned. "Besides, he owes me for getting him the history notes he missed."
"Okay."
They walked up to the counter, placing their orders with the tall pimply-faced kid behind the counter. Rumiko giggled demurely behind her hand when her darling Hojo gave his friend some good advice on how to treat his acne. He's so cute when he does that… I wonder if we'll still be together when I start having hot flashes…
A few minutes later, their order was ready, and Hojo led the way as he carried the tray. After finding a secluded booth in the back, they sat down across from each other. Like a pair of young lovers, they enjoyed their shrimp burgers and chocolate milkshakes as if there were no one else around. Feeling daring, and slipping off a shoe, Rumiko ran her foot up his leg to gently toe his crotch as they ate. Unfortunately, poor Hojo responded to that by choking on a French fry.
Lucky for both of them, they were sitting under the Heimlich maneuver poster and Rumiko was able to save her young boyfriend from an untimely death. Shaken and stirred, Hojo melted back into his seat at the booth. He slowly came back to himself as he stared intently into Rumiko's eyes. Why did it take me so long to realize you're so much prettier than your daughter…? And so much more willing to have sex…He reached across the table for her hand, loving the way she coyly smiled back at him. They sat there for what felt like an eternity, slowly leaning towards one another for a kiss, heedless of whether or not someone would see them. Tilting his head to the side, Hojo was nearly close enough to kiss her passionately on the lips when...
"Hey, Hojo-kun, Higurashi-san! How's Kagome's beriberi doing?"
"Is she better yet?"
"When is she returning to school?"
"She's fine, girls. I think she'll hopefully be back in a couple of weeks and unfortunately, it's left her feeling weak, so I don't think she's up to having company yet. I'm really sorry," Rumiko said, smoothly cutting off any self-invitations to come over to her house from her daughter's friends. She was planning a very fun ending to this date involving whipped cream and a Hello Kitty vibrator and she wasn't about to let a bunch of teenaged girls spoil her fun. "In fact, I think we should be going. Are you ready, Hojo-kun?" Before Kagome's friends could say anything, she added, "I'd appreciate it if would stop by and explain the science homework to Kagome. It shouldn't take long, right? You don't want to tire her out," she said, using the code words for "Mama wants to have a lil fun tonight with her naughty lil boy!"
"No… So if you'll excuse us?" Hojo said as they got up from the booth.
"Uh… Bye…"
"Good day, girls. Come, Hojo-kun."
"It'll be my pleasure," Hojo said. And yours…