Mable: This is a request fic for Shadow930; I hope it is everything you wanted! ^-^ I don't own 9, Enjoy!
Guiding Him Home
After such a devastating few days, the Library was finally quiet, and Nine knew it was his time to act.
He slowly pushed down his blanket and sat upwards on the padding covered book that he was temporarily using as a bed. From what he could see around the study, the others were still asleep, and that's how he wanted it. He stood entirely and started to creep around their bodies. Thankfully, the twins and Seven had their own rooms already made in the Library, or any of the three could've heard him. The other five were not as fortunate. Two, Five, Six, Eight, and One were all laying on makeshift beds like Nine's own.
Two had by far the most comfortable bed. It was made in a small box that had been filled with cotton fluff to cushion it. Nobody argued, as Two needed as much comfort as he could get. He had gone through extensive surgery to get him new legs and, while they were close to the Scientist's original design and already starting to respond, Two was still dealing with extensive pain. Five hadn't given him the clear to even try walking yet either, and the inventor was too sore to argue. Currently, he was out like a light.
One was sleeping on a book like Nine had been. Shockingly enough, while One did occasionally grumble in discomfort, he had not given any verbal complaints or asked for special treatment. He was only slightly grumpy and Nine assumed this was from his hand surgery more than his sleeping situation. Even now he had his hand cuddled tightly to his chest while his other clutched at his blanket. Nine couldn't help but be proud of One. He really did seem like he learned from his behavior and was trying to turn himself around.
Then there was Eight and Six. Nine never was under the impression that the two were close, quite the contrary, but they were sleeping together. Eight was propped against a slanted book propped on a stack, with only a roll of cloth under his head as a pillow. Six was laying on the floor, resting his head on Eight's leg as he slept, and Eight's hand was tightly locked on his shoulder. There was makeshift bedding material under them both and each had a blanket that they were tucked underneath. Even Six was sleeping soundly.
Eight and Six had gotten out of everything with minor injuries, but had awoken in extreme conditions. Six had shattered an optic lens, twisted his ankle, and was stuck at the bottom of a trench. Eight had torn stitches in his head, a large slice down his back, a burn mark on his arm, and was stuck under the factory's rubble. Yet both were fine enough to come back here with little medical. At this time, Eight had become almost clingy towards Six, and the two had been virtually inseparable and still were.
Then, finally, there was Five. Losing Five hurt, watching Five work on Two hurt, watching Five wince as he received a new patch hurt, but nothing hurt more than knowing he caused all of this. Nine lingered over Five and stared down at him with his guilt printed on his face. He hated knowing everything that had happened was his own fault. He made these mistakes, he wasn't there for his best friend, and he would have to live with it for the rest of his life. What he didn't have to live with, however, was his risk of hurting the others again.
Nine had made up his mind the moment that the others were brought back to the Library; he would exile himself into the world to keep them safe. Never again would his quest to be leader nor his endless curiosity risk his friends and family. He quietly crossed to the entrance of the study and stepped out. Nearby, hidden behind a mound of books, Nine had a small bag packed with the basic supplies; thread, a needle, a few matches, and a small knife. With all his things together, he should've been able to walk out.
…But he couldn't. Not without saying goodbye. If anyone, Five deserved a proper goodbye.
Nine slipped back into the study to retrieve the ink that the twins collected for Six, some paper, and one of the makeshift quills they had. Quickly, he scribbled down a farewell note to his best friend, rolled it up and tied it with thread, and then carried it back inside. He knelt beside the one eyed male and gently laid it in his bent arm. Five was laying on the floor on a makeshift bed, beside Two's own. Again, he was selflessly accepting the more uncomfortable position for the others, and Nine could only wish that he could give him more.
This was for the best and with a final sigh, Nine stood and headed out of the study. Then out into the world. His first stop would be the Scientist's Workshop, where he would get more rest and prepare for his vast journey into the Emptiness beyond the city. Five wouldn't find out until morning anyways, so he had the time to spare. He left the Library with a heavy heart but an honest belief that he was right.
Though he was wrong about one thing. Little did Nine expect, but his slight touch of Five when he set down the parchment had only started to rouse the male. By time he was mostly alert though, Nine was already gone. "Hmm?" Five questioning and tiredly hummed as he glanced around. He thought that Two had woke him, but it was obvious that Two was still fast asleep. It was then that he noticed the rolled paper and plucked off the thread. He unrolled it in his lap and stared down at the words gracing the page before him.
"To my dear Five, I must leave you. I know you won't understand, but I have put us all in too much risk, so it is safer if I just separate myself now. I plan to travel the Emptiness to figure out my calling in life; what I was meant to do, as it is obvious that I wasn't born to save anybody. Maybe, once I've found this answer, I will return home as the Stitchpunk you deserve. Until this, farewell."
The confusion was immediately overtaken by panic. Five clambered out of his bed and sped out into the Library, clutching the note and running out into the courtyard.
"Nine?!" he called in a frenzy as he stood out in the darkness. However, Nine was nowhere to be seen. "Nine!" he called through cupped hands. Still there was no answer. He rubbed a hand over his head as his other hand tightened his grip on the note. Nine was gone…
But he couldn't have gone far. Five snapped to attention and rushed inside to get his bag. Nine wouldn't travel too much at nighttime, so he had to be close. If he hurried, then he would find him.
The wind that blew into the Scientist's Workshop was cold and unforgiving. Nine had made a makeshift poncho out of some spare fabric in the corner and, while it didn't make him warm, it helped better than nothing. He then moved onto the workbench and to the window, which he shut as tightly as he could. With some of the wind pushed back, he sought out a place on top of the workbench to sleep. Eventually he settled on leaning back awkwardly on a book with his head partially propped by his arm.
It wasn't much at all, but it was also better than nothing. Then he tried to get a few more moments of sleep. That was, until he was jolted awake by something. Not a voice nor a loud sound, but just something faint enough to somehow bring him out of his sleep. He considered going back to sleep immediately, but then considered that it could be a beast and stood, wandering to the edge of the table.
Instead, there was a faint light, followed by a Stitchpunk running into the workshop.
Nine couldn't help but gasp at the sight of the one-eyed male who was his best friend. He ran in, briefly pausing to catch his breath, and looked around the room.
"Nine!" Five scanned the room before looking upwards. There, to his relief, he could see Nine standing on the edge of the table. His face broke into a smile. "You're still here! Thank goodness!"
"Five, what are you doing here?!" Nine questioned in shock. Of course, he knew what he was coming to do, but more reasonably didn't understand how the one-eyed male had gotten here or what he was planning on doing. Instead of answering, the healer headed under the workbench.
"How do I get up?" Five called upwards to his friend.
"There's… There's wires you can climb in the back!" Nine was still shocked, but wasn't about to turn Five away. In fact, he wanted his comfort, even if he felt that he didn't deserve it. It didn't take Five more than a few moments to climb onto the workbench. Once at the top, his friend assisted by pulling him on. "How did you follow me? You weren't even suppose to be awake!"
"Lucky guess," Five quickly admitted as he now faced his friend. After a pause to stare at him, he lunged forwards and wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug. Instantly, Nine could feel the heat in his face. "What were you doing leaving on your own? You- You could've been hurt out here alone." As though Five needed to ask. Just the shaking alone in his voice revealed that he was purposefully playing ignorant. Five didn't want to believe that his friend would leave because he thought he was a burden. That would break his large heart in two.
"Five, you read my message… I needed to go," Nine insisted to him. He turned away and looked across the workshop, trying to look at anything other than his friend. "Five, it was my fault that you and the others were- nearly were killed. My decisions and mistakes hurt everyone. I'm a risk to everyone." He felt cold and clutched his poncho closer to himself as he hung his head. "And everyone is still pressing me to be leader. Like I'm actually capable of being leader."
"But you are," Five softly protested.
"But I don't want to be!" Nine blurted out and fought back. He moved a step forward to dodge the one-eyed male's touch. "I can't be trusted to make the right call and I don't- I don't want your lives in my hands again. I'll just mess up again and ruin it all…" His voice trailed off as his shame lingered in his words and body language.
Five stared at his friend, mouth agape, and waited for the answers to come to him. When they didn't, he reacted the only way he knew how. He took a step forward, then a second, and reached out to lay his hands on Nine's shoulders. The zippered male started to shirk away and Five reacted immediately; wrapping his arms securely around his friend to stop him.
"I never want to hear you say that again," Five commanded in a surprisingly firm voice. Then he clarified further. "That you can't be trusted, that you're a risk; it's just not true. If it wasn't for you, I would still be scared and meek, and- and hiding away in the Cathedral, waiting for Two," he pointed out with a sigh. "You've given us all so much. You can't just forget that because of one mistake."
Nine's voice hitched in a choke and his bowed his head a slight bit. He slowly started to cave into the warmth that the one-eyed male provided.
"We need you. I need you," Five pleaded, "and not just to lead us. You don't have to be leader."
"After how stubborn I was? I'll look like a fool turning down leadership," Nine admitted his fear. "Or even worse, I'll look like a hypocrite who forced One out of the position and then wouldn't step up to be an adequate leader in return."
"That's not true," Five protested. "The others understand. Nine, we're not just- We're not a mindless group looking for someone to dictate us. We're a family, and we need you!" His voice grew a little more determined, able to bypass his own shyness from their position. He only hugged his best friend harder. "Please…"
"I… I don't know what to do," Nine admitted.
"Then I do," Five volunteered as he pulled back and turned his friend to face him. "Let's find somewhere where we can comfortably stay the night and talk this through. We can figure this out together." The desperation was obvious on his face. He was pleading with his best friend, begging for a chance, and Nine didn't know if he was strong enough to turn him down. He looked down at the other's hand, now on his wrist, and made his decision.
"Okay."
In the end, Nine and Five decided to stay in the Scientist's Workshop. They just found more spare fabric and laid it down as bedding on the shelf beneath the window, tucked between a small wall of books. It helped keep their focus away from the body in the room. Nine noticed that Five refused to look at the body and, after noticing this, suggested if he wanted to go somewhere else. Regardless, Five had seemed content staying in the room. Currently, they were sitting on the window's edge, staring out at the Emptiness. The dimmest light of morning was already starting to appear.
"I just can't get over it. Everyone else is, sort of," Nine shrugged pitifully. "They're just moving on. They're able to accept what happened and are trying to get their footing in the Library, but I… I just can't move on."
"Nine, it's only been a few days," Five insisted. He reached out and draped an arm around his friend's shoulders. "We're not moving on, we're just- Well, I can't speak for the others, but I feel like I'm going through the motions a lot of the time. I'm just… Holding on to reassure Two. I don't want him stressed." Five admitted right back as he pulled Nine in closer. The zippered male eagerly slid in until their fabric was brushing. Five's warmth was welcome and a soothing reminder that, with everything that went wrong, he was still here with him.
"I-I guess I didn't even notice… I'm sorry, Five. Here I am complaining when you've had to work so hard," Nine pointed out in shame.
"No, no, no. We've all had to work hard, Nine. You included," Five insisted. "That's just what we do. I just meant that I… Sometimes I deal with emotions upfront. Sometimes it takes a while for them to come back and haunt me." He trailed on that for a few seconds, then looked over with a smile. "It was a weird adventure though, wasn't it? We fought a snake with a doll head, we blew up a factory, and while you destroyed the Machine, I survived what should've been death by 'magical rain'. This… Someday, we're going to look back on this and laugh."
Nine looked at him briefly, staring, and then snickered. "You make it all sound silly. Remind me not to let you write a book about what happened, or it'll turn into the Wizard of Oz." He then broke into honest chuckles.
Five followed suit, "I think it already is the Wizard of Oz. I gained courage, we all gained a home, One gained…"
"A sense of humor!" Nine blurted out in joking and this triggered laughter out of Five. The two laughed together for a few moments. It felt so good to laugh, to have a carefree moment, and it only ended when another sound joined then. A stack of papers slid down on the floor nearby, making a rustling noise. Both Stitchpunks gasped and looked back at the noise. Nine, especially paranoid, grabbed ahold of Five as though he was prepared to shield him from the threat. Which there wasn't one; there was just loose papers to blame.
The laughter returned, but it was softer, a little more forced, and more awkward. Nine started to pull back from Five, "Sorry about that…"
"Don't-…" Five reached out and took Nine's arms, pulling him back close again. "Don't worry about it." He smiled warmly while Nine briefly looked surprised, then smiled back. He had almost forgotten, with how focused he was on his own guilt, how wonderful it was to have Five back. For a while he had thought that he had lost his friend forever, only for him to suddenly come back.
"…I don't know what I would've done if you wouldn't have come," Nine admitted as he tightened his hold. It was almost a hug, but they were still pulled back enough that he could face Five. "I would have left, walked, found shelter, and then came to a complete halt. I just wouldn't have been able to deal with not being with you." His smile returned, "Out of everything I did wrong, meeting you, being your friend, has been the best choice of my life. I will never regret that."
"That's great! I wouldn't either," Five smiled just the same, relieved to see that Nine was feeling at least moderately better. Then his smile faltered as he considered saying something more. He didn't want to take advantage of Nine while he was distraught, but he didn't think he could bear waiting. "… Nine… Have you ever thought- Maybe- That you don't want to be friends? Maybe, just, something else? Something closer?"
"I don't really understand," Nine admitted, "but of course! I'd give almost anything to be closer to you. Except you, of course, I wouldn't give you for anything." He got a playful smile. It was enough to cause a blush to grip Five's cheeks and refuse to back down.
"I was… Hoping to wait until we got settle in… But with this and how you're feeling, I don't think I can wait." Five averted his optic down to their arms for a moment. "Seven mentioned that you two weren't… Together in any way." He was clearly questioning it.
"No," Nine admitted, feeling an odd sort of thumping in his chest. "We… It never went anywhere. After we lost everyone- after I lost you- I lost that feeling for her. There were some other things, but it was mostly just… I wasn't that infatuated with her," he bluntly admitted. "I was in awe of her and impressed by her, and I had some feelings for Seven, but I grew out of them."
Five gave a light chuckle, "You're not the only one. I think everyone's had feelings for Seven at least once." The healer took a moment to regain his words before speaking. "I know this is sudden, but do you think that we- that maybe you'd like to be with me?" Five slide his arms down so that he could instead take Nine's hands. He squeezed them in his own, warmer ones. "I know that it's new for you, but I'd like to have that with you. I want you to stay and- not be leader- but be my… Significant other." His voice broke at the two words and he almost stumbled on them.
"I- Yes! Of course!... But are you sure?" As happy as Nine was to eagerly agree, wanting to learn how to be a couple with him, he couldn't help but have doubts. "Five, I'm liable to hurt you again."
"You would never hurt me on purpose," Five assured with confidence. "You would never hurt anyone on purpose. I know that everything you've done has been to help the others. You can't let one mistake do this to you." He finally slid in for a full hug. He held Nine close to his buttons and gave a soft sigh. "You can't keep falling apart over this. It wasn't your fault."
And finally, after all of this, Nine started to believe Five's words. He hugged back and nuzzled into him. He gave his own hum of affection. "I'll go back with you," he agreed and Five squeezed tighter. It wasn't that Nine didn't want to go back, he certainly did, but that doubt had clung to him. He knew he would be expecting guilt, but the thought of leaving Five now was unbearable. "…But can we just stay here for now? I want to stay with you a little longer."
"O-Of course!" Five was practically beaming, though his nervous stuttering had returned in full force. "Just us, here, together. We can do that." Nine was relieved by the suggestion. He needed at least a night to take everything in. The zippered male turned his head and briefly pressed his lips to Five's patch.
"Thank you, Five. For everything," Nine murmured. Then he decided to take a chance and be fully honest, "I love you, Five. I don't know where I'd be without you."
"I-I love you too," Five stuttered out before turning his head and eagerly leaning in. He briefly paused before their lips made contact, but Nine finished through the action. The kiss wasn't a long one, but it brought about a soothing warmth that contrasted the cool breeze from outside. It had lit a flame that had been snuffed inside of Nine for a while.
Neither intended to sleep as long as they had. It wasn't until noontime when they arrived at the Library. The sun was high, but the day wasn't too warm, and the Stitchpunks took little time in their journey back to their home. As they entered the courtyard, they could already spot One and Seven in the distance, standing on the Library steps. Most likely Seven was about to leave and search for them, but it was unclear whether she also saw the note that Nine had left.
Nine inhaled and exhaled in a smooth motion, trying to come to terms with his decision. He couldn't run from it; he would have to work through the guilt head on. He was pulled out of his somberness by Five taking ahold of his hand and sending him a smile.
"We'll just tell them… That we were scouting? How about that, so they don't worry?" Five suggested. Though they both knew that it was more out of the possibility of Nine becoming embarrassed. That being said, it seemed like a good idea.
"Sounds good to me," Nine encouraged and squeezed the one-eyed male's hand. "Think they'll be alright with us being 'us' now?" he asked in an almost playful way.
Five chuckled in return, "I think so. Two was already sort of nudging me, so I know he's going to be happy." He then tilted his head slightly, still smiling but still concerned. "Are you sure you're okay? I don't know if they've seen us yet, so we could wait a little longer."
Nine looked over and could see that Seven was already starting across the courtyard. "I think it's too late for that, but don't worry, I'm ready," Nine insisted with a bit more confidence in his voice. "Let's go home." Five gave him another loving squeeze and began to walk with him back towards the Library. It was going to be different now, Nine knew this. However, for the first time since the others returned, he had a newfound hope in himself. Something about Five's affection made him feel better about himself.
It didn't matter if he lost his way; Five would always be his guide to lead him back.
FIN
Mable: One request down, plenty more to go! I hope you enjoyed! ^-^
