Coulson walked into the briefing room.
"Someone's been taking out every spy we've sent into D.C."
"Good morning to you too, sir," muttered Hunter under his breath.
"Shut up Hunter," snapped Bobbi.
"Alright, alright sweetheart."
Coulson glared in Hunter's direction, and then turned back to the screen.
"As I was saying, she's taken out all four agents we've sent into DC, for no apparent reason. Just a random civilian, knocking out highly trained spies. We followed Agent Karl with every security camera and caught this."
A video popped up on the screen and Coulson pressed play. The agent walked casually, as casually someone in a full suit can, around a corner into a dark alley, where a small girl with blonde hair approached him. After a brief conversation, she suddenly kicked his chin, knocking his head back, then she kicked his stomach, jumped on his chest, and knocked him unconscious on a metal trashcan. Then, wiping her hands and patting her hair, she walked away with his S.H.I.E.L.D. badge.
The whole team stared -
"I know," said Coulson, "Thanks to Skye, we cross-referenced her face with several other camera feeds, and found these—she knocked out every other agent, with the same tactic."
"She looks barely ten," said Mack, "How did she learn all that? Is she a spy? Part of the Black Widow Program? Or something like that? IS SHE HYDRA?" He cracked his knuckles and glared menacingly at the paused video.
"No, calm down, Mack. Just a girl in DC. Skye found her ID—Brynn Pembroke, age eleven, 51 inches tall, blonde hair, blue eyes, from Mary Grace Orphanage, attends Lee Point Middle School." He pulled up a picture of a girl staring innocently at the camera, with loose curls framing her face, round cheeks and huge blue eyes.
"Oh no," said Bobbi immediately, "you want us to take her in don't you?"
Coulson just looked at her, head tilted to the side as if to say, "Do you even have to ask?"
"Can't we just report her to Juvie or something? Why do we have to deal with her?" whined Hunter.
"Because she targeted our agents, and no one else. She has a reason for this, and I'm not putting any more of my agents in danger."
"Danger of being attacked by a tiny girl with squishy cheeks. Oh my, that's so terrifying. Wait… it actually is…."
"Yeah, which is why we have to bring her in. At least to find out what her point in doing this is. So, her dance lessons are right after school lets out. She gets back from her ballet lessons at 6:30 to the orphanage through an alleyway behind Grey Hill Street. Wait there until she arrives. Hunter, Bobbi, Skye, you all wait at the alley, and May, you scan the area. Got it?"
The team nodded.
"Good. Dismissed."
The Bus landed in an open field and Hunter, Bobbi and Skye drove out in one of the SUVs. In about twenty minutes, they reached Grey Hill Avenue, parked, and began walking to the alley.
"You know what would be so embarrassing?" asked Skye.
"I don't know if anything's more embarrassing than three highly trained amazing agents, if I say so myself, going after pre-pubescent girl from her ballet class." Said Hunter.
"Being knocked out by said little girl." Laughed Skye.
They turned the corner and all three jumped about three feet in the air. Sitting casually on a trashcan with a light pink duffel bag was their target. She smiled cheekily up at them and jumped off the trashcan.
"Hi," she said shyly.
"Stay away!" Squeaked Hunter, grabbing his chin.
"How did you know we were coming?" asked Skye, incredulously.
"Because I wanted you to," replied Brynn, "Why else would I attack your agents?"
"Wha-um-okay….. errr, come with us." Said Bobbi awkwardly.
"Happy to comply," said the girl eagerly, and ran up between them, swinging her duffel bag. "So, where are we going?"
Coulson stared at the girl. Then he stared at his agents. And then back at the girl.
"How did you know we were coming?" he asked finally.
"I targeted your agents so you would come after me and take me." She said sweetly.
"How did you know what time we were coming?"
"Well that's the only reasonable time. Early mornings going to school—too many people around going to work, to school, to sell drugs, y'know. During school, well that's obvious. You can't just barge into a school and grab someone from P.E. After school, on my way to dance, too many kids would be coming home from school, and lots of people would be coming home from work, and they'd see you. So clearly not then. Home from dance, I go through the alley, and it's dinner time. People don't eat their dinner in the alley, so no one would see you, and you would have the perfect chance to grab me."
Coulson stared in astonishment, and then quickly shut his mouth and cleared his throat in a very dignified manner.
"So… why did you want us to get you?"
"Because I don't want to live at the orphanage anymore. It's awful. I decided to get "kidnapped." And since I didn't want to get kidnapped by mobsters or gangsters and the like, I decided on a big "secret organization". Luckily, I watch the news so I know about S.H.I.E.L.D. So, I got help from a friend of mine who's an expert hacker, and he hacked into S.H.I.E.L.D. for me. It took a long time. Then I looked up every person from S.H.I.E.L.D. who was sent into D.C. and followed them around and knocked them out. And now I'm finally free."
The whole team blinked. Then Skye said, "Huh. Makes sense. I hate orphanages too."
The rest of the team seemed to break out of their trance.
"Please don't make me go back," begged Brynn, "I really don't want to. I'll do anything you want- just don't send me back."
"Well," said Coulson, "would you try to get kidnapped again if we sent you back?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Hold on- who's your friend? The one who hacked S.H.I.E.L.D?"
"His name is Gage. He's part of a group called the Flowing Tide, or something like that."
"Rising Tide?"
"Oh, right, that's what it was."
"How did you meet him?"
"He's in the orphanage. He says he goes to a soft ball group after school, but he goes to those meetings. I found out, and he made me keep quiet about it. Not like I was going to tell anyways.. But I used it over him to get him to hack S.H.I.E.L.D for me."
"How long did you plan this whole thing?"
"Four months."
Coulson "huh"ed and leaned against his desk. After thinking for a while, he said, "I need to think. All of you out, except May. Get Pembroke something to eat."
The agents left, and Coulson "huh"ed again.
"Well, what should we do about her?"
"I like her," said May, smirking a little.
"But we can't keep a child around the base."
"A very smart and mature child."
"I know but… It's not safe."
"Even less safe for her to go gallivanting off in the middle of DC trying to get kidnapped again."
"Why are children so difficult?"
"I don't know, Phil. But you saw what she can do. She can take out a 6 foot man with a kick, a jump and a punch."
"And a metal trashcan."
"What I'm saying is, we should keep her. She clearly has a lot of skills, and she planned this whole escape by herself. Eleven years old. We could use her help."
"An eleven year old's help?"
"She did basically trick a bunch of adult agents into helping her escape from an orphanage."
Coulson thought for a long time.
"Fine. We'll keep her. But I'm not reading any bedtime stories."