Peter's Lament

Forest Hills Cemetery, Queens

Have I done right by you?

I've always done my best to live up to that lesson.

"With great power, there must also come great responsibility."

If I had a nickel every time I've repeated that to myself . . .

But have I succeeded?

I've failed so many times.

I failed you first,

When I didn't stop that thug when I could have.

When I should have.

That failure will haunt me for the rest of my life.

I failed Captain Stacy,

When I acted without thinking,

When I should have been thinking.

I failed Gwen,

When I didn't save her.

When I could have saved her.

I've replayed that scene in my head a million times.

If I had done things different,

If I had shot straighter,

If I had leaped after her,

If I had used my head,

I could have saved her.

But I failed.

My greatest fear is that her fate was my fault.

Either way I'm responsible.

I failed Harry.

My best friend,

Despite everything.

When the chips were down,

He saved me.

He saved my wife.

He saved his son.

But I couldn't save him.

So many other failures.

So many other losses.

I think I may have screwed up again,

With the whole Registration Act thing.

I may have just my family's life in serious danger.

Did I do the right thing?

I'm not so sure anymore.

Just another failure.

So many other failures.

So many other losses.

I failed Betty when I didn't save her brother.

I failed my other Ben, when he sacrificed his life for mine.

I failed my child,

When I couldn't stop Norman from taking her from me,

When I should have.
Norman comes back in a lot of this.

He took Gwen.

His unholy legacy took Harry.

Why can't I ever finally put him away for good?

He almost took Aunt May from me too.

But I saved her that time.

I almost lost Aunt May once before that too.

But I saved her that time as well.

Your memory helped me pull thru for her then.

Your memory helps me when I think I can't do it.

Come to think of it,

I've saved a lot of people over the years.

All the muggers I've stopped,

The super-powered wackos I've thwomped,

The car-jackings,

The robberies,

Even the occasional team-up,

Not to mention the semi-regular apocalyptic events.

I have done some good.

I've done a lot of good.

You taught me to do good,

You hoped that I would do good with my life.

And I think I have.

You were right.

The rain stops beating my sorrows.

MJ is holding an umbrella for me.

She gives a hopeful smile.

And then I know that

I am not a failure.

Because I've saved her too.

I may have screwed up here and there.

But who doesn't?

I'm only (super)human.

I saved MJ from Brock,

From Kraven . . .

I came thru for her when she needed that medicine that once.

I almost failed our marriage,

But I didn't.

I did do the right thing then.

I can't imagine my life without her.

She is my center.

And I wouldn't trade that for anything.

So, I guess that when the chips are down,

I can come thru.

I am not a failure,

So long as I keep trying.

Thanks, Uncle Ben.

You always did know how to listen

And put things in perspective.

So I will always do the best I can to live up to your teachings to me.

"That with great power, there must also come great responsibility."