Disclaimer: iCarly doesn't belong to me, and never will. No copyright infrigement intended. This all belongs to Dan Schneider. None of this happened on the show.
Thirty-one year old Carly Shay couldn't believe her brother was dead. How was she supposed to deal with this? Spencer had started raising her when she was five years old. Their father really hadn't been involved in their lives.
"Are you okay?" Marissa Benson asked her. She had been the only one able to calm down a hysterical Carly. Sam had bolted to the bathroom and locked herself in.
An in shock Freddie was taking care of Sam and Spencer's three year old son Matthew and five month old daughter Elizabeth for the time being, since Sam was still in the bathroom. She wasn't planning on leaving anytime soon, either.
"I'm fine," Carly lied. She wasn't sure how she was ever going to be okay again. Spencer was dead.
Marissa didn't believe her. "You should sit down," she suggested. Marissa wanted to leave for her apartment and start baking, but that wasn't important. She was worried about Carly. Carly was Marissa's priority at the moment.
"I don't want to sit down!" Carly snapped. Mrs. Benson and Freddie were irritating her. Where was Sam? Shouldn't she be there?
"Caroline, I know that you're upset. I understand that. I'm worried about you," Marissa explained. She had a feeling that the next few months were going to be a struggle.
Carly sighed. "I'm really sorry." She wanted to cry, but the tears weren't coming. What was wrong with her? Maybe the divorce had affected her more than she originally thought.
"It's okay," Marissa assured her. She had gone through many emoitons after Freddie's father's death. She hadn't lost a sibling, but knew that grieving for someone you loved was a long and difficult process.
"Did the doctor say if he suffered?" Carly questioned. She couldn't really remember anything that had happened immediately after learning of Spencer's death. Oh, God. Spencer was dead.
Marissa choked down a sob. She didn't know why she was so upset. "He was killed instantly. There was no pain."
"Is Sam hurt?" Carly was briefly reminded of the fact that Sam had also been in the accident. She was incredibly grateful for the fact that Matthew and Elizabeth had been in daycare.
"She has a concussion and a broken wrist. The doctor thinks she's going to be bruised tomorrow. Those are the exent of her injuries," Marissa told her. Sam had been the only survivor of the car accident that killed Spencer, the driver in the other car, and two passengers in the other car. Nobody told her that part. Freddie and Marissa had decided not to. Carly had blocked out her memories of the past few hours, so she didn't remember either.
"That's good," Carly murmured. It had just hit her that she needed to call her and Spencer's father. He deserved to know his son was dead.
"Are you hungry?" Marissa really needed to cook something to distract her from the horrible next few days. Distractions were really good.
Carly shook her head. "Go home," she ordered. Carly needed to be alone. Maybe she would call Robert too. Her ex-husband had been close to Spencer before Carly caught him cheating on her.
"I'm staying with you, and I want to help." Marissa wasn't about to leave. Carly, Sam, and Freddie needed her.
Carly wasn't paying attention anymore. "Whatever," she mumbled. She didn't really care.
Marissa briefly considered finding the spaghetti taco recipe, but then decided it was a bad idea. Nobody needed that right now. "I'm going to make you dinner," she vowed.
Carly shrugged, lost in memories of growing up with Spencer. "Be careful."
Marissa shot a confused look towards her, but went into the kitchen. She was already preparing a menu in her mind for the dinner between viewings. Carly and Sam were going to need her help with planning for the funeral. "What do you want to eat?"
Carly didn't answer, so Marissa let it go. She would cook whatever was in the cupboards.
Carly had decided the next few days were going to be longer. Nothing was ever going to be the same again.
XXXXXXXX
Freddie still couldn't accept the fact that Spencer Shay was dead. Spencer had been there for him a lot when he was a teenager. He had been the best man at Sam and Spencer's wedding.
"Unc Freddie?" asked Matthew. He didn't understand what was going on. His mommy was gone, and Daddy was too.
"What's up, Mattie?" Freddie answered. He wondered how long he was going to be able to take care of Mattie and Beth, but immediately decided it didn't matter. It was hard lying to Matthew, however.
"Want Mommy and Daddy." Matthew missed them. He had no idea how his life had changed forever.
Freddie stifled a sob. He didn't want to be upset in front of Mattie. The three year old didn't understand his daddy was dead. "They're away for a little while," he lied, his voice cracking. Lucky for Freddie, the little Shay didn't notice.
Elizabeth began to cry, so Freddie got up to get her. Matthew continued to play with his favorite toy – blocks. "What's wrong, Beth? I know you're upset. So am I," Freddie whispered as he tried to comfort the baby.
"She cries lots," Matthew said. Daddy said he needed to 'tect his mommy and Beth, but Matthew didn't think so.
Freddie laughed. Sam was going to need help for awhile. He and Carly would baby-sit for her. Maybe just him, if Carly fell apart. "I know she does, Mattie."
He hoped Sam and Carly were okay, but Freddie doubted that. Sam was still in the bathroom and his mom was with Carly.
Freddie was unsure of what was going to happen next. The funeral was going to be in two days, but what was going to happen from there? Sam was a widow now. That shouldn't be happening this soon, if at all. Sam was now a thirty-one year old single mother. Spencer was dead at forty-four. None of this was fair.
"Eat?" questioned a hopeful Matthew. It was too quiet, and that scared the little boy.
"Grandma's making dinner," Freddie replied. He could smell dinner cooking. His mother had taken over the role of grandmother for the Shay kids since Kelly Shay was dead and Megan Puckett had abandoned her daughter after high school graduation.
'Kay." Matthew went back to playing with his blocks. He would be kept in the dark about his father's death for another day.
Freddie sighed in relief when Beth's eyes closed and she fell asleep. He put her in the car. "Be glad you don't understand yet," he whispered to the baby.
Nothing was ever going to be the same again.
XXXXXXX
Sam Shay refused to leave the bathroom. Sometimes, she could hear Carly and Mrs. Benson, but it was quiet at the moment. Sam could smell dinner cooking, but didn't care. She had no appetite. "Come back," she pleaded.
Sam wished she couldn't remember the accident. Everything was so clear – Getting hit head on and the sound of crunching metal. She had been knocked unconscious for a few minutes, and woke up to a dead husband. Sam hadn't even been able to say good-bye.
"Dinner's ready! Please come!" Marissa Benson called. She was desperately hoping that Sam would eat.
"I'm not hungry!" Sam replied. She had only turned down meals in the midst of morning sickness.
"You need to eat something, Samantha." Now Marissa was really worried. Sam never turned down meals because she loved eating so much.
"Leave me alone!" Sam screamed. Why didn't anyone understand that she needed to be by herself right now? Spencer was gone. She had to raise two kids on her own.
"I'll put leftovers in the fridge for when you do get hungry," Marissa decided. She sincerely hoped that Sam's appetite would kick in soon, but doubted it.
"Whatever. I'm not going to eat." Sam wanted to sleep in the bathroom and never leave the apartment again. With luck, she would never wake up. It was a really good plan. This plan was going to work, and no one could convince Sam otherwise.
"Freddie's taking care of Matthew and Elizabeth. They're going to need you soon, Sam. There's no pressure, but you're going to have to come out eventually, Baby," Marissa informed her. Her maternal instincts were out in full force now.
"I'll think about coming out later," Sam lied. Right now, she couldn't stop thinking about the love of her life.
"That's all I ask," Marissa answered. She walked away, hoping that Sam would leave the bathroom and that Carly was eating.
"I want you back, Spence," Sam murmured. She couldn't stop thinking about her husband, and what he meant to her.
Sam wished that today had never happened. They had been having so much fun yesterday and this morning. They had made love before leaving home today.
She briefly wondered how Carly and Freddie were doing. Everybody loved Spencer. He had such a great personality.
"Can you come out so I can go to the bathroom?" Freddie asked through the door. Both Shay kids were with his mom and Carly. In fact, his mom had offered to take Mattie and Beth for the night. Carly had accepted for Sam.
"Go to your om's place, nerd!" Sam shouted. She wasn't about to leave. That was such a stupid plan.
Freddie sighed and decided going to his mom's apartment was a better idea. He would end up breaking down in the bathroom.
Sam didn't want to think about the funeral or burying Spencer. Those things were bad to think about. She laid down on the floor and began to sob.
There was one thing Sam knew for sure. Nothing was ever going to be the same again.