Author's note: Just a short story. And this is an AU story! I'll spell the names correctly but then don't come complaining about the fact that I have my own ideas about some characters.
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue etc...
Preview: B'Elanna has a problem and it looks like Tuvok can help her. Short Tu/Tor story.
~Fear~
Tuvok walked straight past the mess hall. He wasn't feeling any sign of hunger and this was about the time when most the crew ate their dinner. He didn't feel like sitting among them. He'd skip dinner again and would go straight to his quarters.
It was strange, after all those years of schooling and training he still had his moments of emotional imbalance. But he wasn't supposed to experience any of that. He was supposed to suppress them and never hear from them again, only once every seven years perhaps, but that was unavoidable.
He heared the laughter from the mess hall as he past it, the strange feeling caught up with him, a nasty feeling, almost anxiety like.
He increased his speed and focused on all the other noises around him. The soft humming of the warp core always on the background ofcourse. The light vibrating sounds of the walls' control panels, the soothing low sound of the warp engines, and there were his soft, light footsteps, now almost impossible to hear.
He was doing it again. He was escaping into his own world...
Suddenly he snapped out of his trance.
More footsteps, and not so light. They were approaching.
He almost turned a corner when B'Elanna crashed into him. She tripped backwards because of the collision, let out a small sob and wiped her eyes with her right hand while holding up her left in apologise.
"Sorry..." she said softly with a thick voice.
Tuvok raised an eyebrow. It was very unusual to see a (half) Klingon cry in public, but to hear one say sorry for bumping into someone... now that was even more rare.
B'Elanna looked up and saw him staring at her with some sort of amazement.
"I'm fine" She beat him to the question.
"By the amount of tears on your face and uniform I would say you are far from fine"
She hung her head.
"I'll give him a reason for it" She mumbled.
"Give who a reason for what?" She glared at him, but now her eyes were blazing with rage.
Tuvok somehow seemed more at ease now that she stopped crying and started raging again. It was common behaviour for her and it didn't disturb any inner balance.
"Give that bastard a reason for ever thinking such a thing!" she banged her fist against the wall and immediately clenched it with her other hand hiding a painful look in her eyes.
"That clears it all up" Tuvok sighed.
B'Elanna took a swing at him; even if he didn't intend so, it was sarcasm.
He grabbed her wrist in a reflex and held it tight so it was impossible for her to free it. She in return tried to punch him with her other fist. He grabbed it too.
"See!? Even you think the same of me, everybody thinks the same of me" She slammed her foot on the floor and tried to free her hands. "Let go of me!"
He didn't let go, instead, he forced her hands down.
"I won't let go until you calm down"
She looked at him, eyes blazing.
"You're all the same!" She raged
"No were not" he calmly replied.
"You're afraid of me, you won't let go because you're afraid I'd hurt you! You fear me!"
Tuvok considered, it was almost impossible for her to really hurt him. He wasn't afraid of her, he was trying to protect her from hurting herself, not hurting him. "That's not the reason I'm holding you, but as you wish" There was something else to her remark.
The nasty feeling inside him was growing.
He let go.
She staggered backwards, reclaimed her balance and swung at him with all her might. Her hand slapped across his face, her nails leaving four deep cuts on his cheek. He didn't blink, he didn't move, he didn't flinch for a second.
B'Elanna stood there, stunned by her own action. She had hit a fellow senior officer in the face!
How was she going to justify this?
How?
She looked at him. He just stood there now bleeding slightly from the cuts.
"I-I'm so..."
He held up his hand and she stopped. He touched his cheek and looked at the green blood on his fingers.
"So Klingons CAN only be calmed down after they've had a chance to pound something"
"Tuvok I..."
"No, don't" He could barely hear her voice in the distance.
It was all coming back. The feeling inside him.
B'Elanna observed him; he wasn't a bit scared. But then again, she wouldn't know when he was. He seemed off balance, but not by the punch.
Then suddenly he walked past her and continued on his way to his quarters.
Deep within, emotions stirred. He could feel his entire being come floating above. After he tried so hard to suppress everything. The panic, the fear.
No! He needed to suppress it, keep it down.
"Tuvok!" B'Elanna threw herself in his path, he pushed her aside. She clenched onto his arm but soon lost her grip. She had done something wrong... You moron, ofcourse you did something wrong, you hit him in the face!
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to!"
He took a deep breath, and slowed down a bit. He glanced at her, but soon everything inside him twitched and turned. Her eyes red from crying, crying the tears that wet her face and uniform, her bewildered look. Those eyes.
The fear in her eyes.
Fear of being feared.
It had opened a chapter on his mind that he'd spent years trying to close and keep shut.
He put a hand on her shoulder. She seemed taken aback by it, but didn't act or react. They stood there for what seemed like ages.
B'Elanna would normally be calmed by him being with her. But this time, she noticed a different look in his eyes. It was almost like she could look directly into his soul.
"I don't fear you" he spoke softly.
Such a sudden remark, such an emotional remark. It wasn't like him, not at all. And suddenly her mind made the connection.
Why he wasn't around when everybody gathered. Why he didn't join anything that involved being together with a lot of people in a room, unless it was official.
She had seen it during away missions, conflicts with others, even during their meditation sessions. His strength was incredible, he could easily kill her if he wanted to. He had years of knowledge... Knowledge that made other people feels uneasy when being around him.
She knew it.
Tom had often complained about all this. How he was annoyingly right all the time and how he never seemed to suffer any emotion during whatever situation they were in.
He was in many ways far superior to everyone... and that made them dislike him.
Fear him.
She should have known! They were very similar, never fully accepted by the humans.
She took his hand and squeezed it gently.
"I'd never fear you Tuvok" She replied.
He seemed shocked, just for a millisecond, almost impossible to detect. But she'd seen it.
Then he did something that even surprised himself.
"If you wish, you can tell me your story"
She didn't consider long, and accepted.
***
B'Elanna opened her eyes. Every muscle in her body was tensed and she tried her best to control her breathing.
A Nightmare, it was a nightmare
It wasn't real. They'd never do that.
The image of Voyager's crew hunting her down like an animal disappeared.
She swallowed hard.
Then she felt something, someone lying beside her.
She turned around and saw Tuvok lying next to her, looking at her.
She smiled at him, and he returned it.
He finally managed to close this chapter in his life, and she...
She finally found someone who'd never fear her...
and accepted her for what she was...
***
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue etc...
Preview: B'Elanna has a problem and it looks like Tuvok can help her. Short Tu/Tor story.
~Fear~
Tuvok walked straight past the mess hall. He wasn't feeling any sign of hunger and this was about the time when most the crew ate their dinner. He didn't feel like sitting among them. He'd skip dinner again and would go straight to his quarters.
It was strange, after all those years of schooling and training he still had his moments of emotional imbalance. But he wasn't supposed to experience any of that. He was supposed to suppress them and never hear from them again, only once every seven years perhaps, but that was unavoidable.
He heared the laughter from the mess hall as he past it, the strange feeling caught up with him, a nasty feeling, almost anxiety like.
He increased his speed and focused on all the other noises around him. The soft humming of the warp core always on the background ofcourse. The light vibrating sounds of the walls' control panels, the soothing low sound of the warp engines, and there were his soft, light footsteps, now almost impossible to hear.
He was doing it again. He was escaping into his own world...
Suddenly he snapped out of his trance.
More footsteps, and not so light. They were approaching.
He almost turned a corner when B'Elanna crashed into him. She tripped backwards because of the collision, let out a small sob and wiped her eyes with her right hand while holding up her left in apologise.
"Sorry..." she said softly with a thick voice.
Tuvok raised an eyebrow. It was very unusual to see a (half) Klingon cry in public, but to hear one say sorry for bumping into someone... now that was even more rare.
B'Elanna looked up and saw him staring at her with some sort of amazement.
"I'm fine" She beat him to the question.
"By the amount of tears on your face and uniform I would say you are far from fine"
She hung her head.
"I'll give him a reason for it" She mumbled.
"Give who a reason for what?" She glared at him, but now her eyes were blazing with rage.
Tuvok somehow seemed more at ease now that she stopped crying and started raging again. It was common behaviour for her and it didn't disturb any inner balance.
"Give that bastard a reason for ever thinking such a thing!" she banged her fist against the wall and immediately clenched it with her other hand hiding a painful look in her eyes.
"That clears it all up" Tuvok sighed.
B'Elanna took a swing at him; even if he didn't intend so, it was sarcasm.
He grabbed her wrist in a reflex and held it tight so it was impossible for her to free it. She in return tried to punch him with her other fist. He grabbed it too.
"See!? Even you think the same of me, everybody thinks the same of me" She slammed her foot on the floor and tried to free her hands. "Let go of me!"
He didn't let go, instead, he forced her hands down.
"I won't let go until you calm down"
She looked at him, eyes blazing.
"You're all the same!" She raged
"No were not" he calmly replied.
"You're afraid of me, you won't let go because you're afraid I'd hurt you! You fear me!"
Tuvok considered, it was almost impossible for her to really hurt him. He wasn't afraid of her, he was trying to protect her from hurting herself, not hurting him. "That's not the reason I'm holding you, but as you wish" There was something else to her remark.
The nasty feeling inside him was growing.
He let go.
She staggered backwards, reclaimed her balance and swung at him with all her might. Her hand slapped across his face, her nails leaving four deep cuts on his cheek. He didn't blink, he didn't move, he didn't flinch for a second.
B'Elanna stood there, stunned by her own action. She had hit a fellow senior officer in the face!
How was she going to justify this?
How?
She looked at him. He just stood there now bleeding slightly from the cuts.
"I-I'm so..."
He held up his hand and she stopped. He touched his cheek and looked at the green blood on his fingers.
"So Klingons CAN only be calmed down after they've had a chance to pound something"
"Tuvok I..."
"No, don't" He could barely hear her voice in the distance.
It was all coming back. The feeling inside him.
B'Elanna observed him; he wasn't a bit scared. But then again, she wouldn't know when he was. He seemed off balance, but not by the punch.
Then suddenly he walked past her and continued on his way to his quarters.
Deep within, emotions stirred. He could feel his entire being come floating above. After he tried so hard to suppress everything. The panic, the fear.
No! He needed to suppress it, keep it down.
"Tuvok!" B'Elanna threw herself in his path, he pushed her aside. She clenched onto his arm but soon lost her grip. She had done something wrong... You moron, ofcourse you did something wrong, you hit him in the face!
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to!"
He took a deep breath, and slowed down a bit. He glanced at her, but soon everything inside him twitched and turned. Her eyes red from crying, crying the tears that wet her face and uniform, her bewildered look. Those eyes.
The fear in her eyes.
Fear of being feared.
It had opened a chapter on his mind that he'd spent years trying to close and keep shut.
He put a hand on her shoulder. She seemed taken aback by it, but didn't act or react. They stood there for what seemed like ages.
B'Elanna would normally be calmed by him being with her. But this time, she noticed a different look in his eyes. It was almost like she could look directly into his soul.
"I don't fear you" he spoke softly.
Such a sudden remark, such an emotional remark. It wasn't like him, not at all. And suddenly her mind made the connection.
Why he wasn't around when everybody gathered. Why he didn't join anything that involved being together with a lot of people in a room, unless it was official.
She had seen it during away missions, conflicts with others, even during their meditation sessions. His strength was incredible, he could easily kill her if he wanted to. He had years of knowledge... Knowledge that made other people feels uneasy when being around him.
She knew it.
Tom had often complained about all this. How he was annoyingly right all the time and how he never seemed to suffer any emotion during whatever situation they were in.
He was in many ways far superior to everyone... and that made them dislike him.
Fear him.
She should have known! They were very similar, never fully accepted by the humans.
She took his hand and squeezed it gently.
"I'd never fear you Tuvok" She replied.
He seemed shocked, just for a millisecond, almost impossible to detect. But she'd seen it.
Then he did something that even surprised himself.
"If you wish, you can tell me your story"
She didn't consider long, and accepted.
***
B'Elanna opened her eyes. Every muscle in her body was tensed and she tried her best to control her breathing.
A Nightmare, it was a nightmare
It wasn't real. They'd never do that.
The image of Voyager's crew hunting her down like an animal disappeared.
She swallowed hard.
Then she felt something, someone lying beside her.
She turned around and saw Tuvok lying next to her, looking at her.
She smiled at him, and he returned it.
He finally managed to close this chapter in his life, and she...
She finally found someone who'd never fear her...
and accepted her for what she was...
***