Disclaimer: I don't own Drake and Josh.

Josh woke up to a volley of Nerf balls hitting him in the face. He saw Megan smirking in the doorway and thanked God it wasn't paintballs. "You have eight minutes, Boob."

"What?"

"For some odd reason your alarm clock didn't go off. Being the sweet, loving sister that I am, I decided to wake you in time for school. I thought eight minutes would be enough." She flashed him a smile and flounced off.

"Megan!" He hurtled out of bed, muttering "I'm gonna be late for Chemistry again."

Slamming open the bathroom door, he walked right into Drake—warm, damp, naked Drake.

Later when his brain was functioning again, he blamed it on being half asleep. Because he didn't walk back out, and he didn't step around Drake and get on with his morning business, which is what any normal brother would have done. Instead, and he's not sure even Oprah could find something reassuring to say about this, he staggered back a step and stared.

Drake was gorgeous—with damp hair falling in his face and beads of water forming on his chest and that other trail of hair leading down to—shit, boys don't look at other boys like this. Josh's eyes jerked back up to Drake's face. He could feel his cheeks getting so hot that he thought he might spontaneously combust. That would actually be good right now. Ending up a little pile of ash on the bathroom floor would be a relatively painless way to deal with this.

Drake froze for a moment, then rolled his eyes, grabbed a towel and said, "Snap out of it, dude. I'm not that hot." And he was gone.

***

It was like flipping through the channels and landing on Make Me Pretty while they were showing live plastic surgery. Drake didn't want to watch; he just couldn't stop himself. Josh and Mindy obviously hadn't heard the door open. She was straddling his waist, their hands were crawling all over each other, and it looked like Mindy was trying to eat Josh's face. Drake was glad that Josh was getting some experience, right? Even if it was with the Creature. He must have made a noise because suddenly they both looked up.

"Voyeur," said Mindy.

"What?"

"Peeping Tom."

"Oh. No. I just came up to get my guitar. I wasn't expecting to see you getting your girl-germs all over our couch."

Mindy arched an eyebrow. "Cooties? That's the best you can come up with? Good to know your maturity and reading skills are both at a third grade level."

Drake knew Josh was trying to avoid a fight, but he still felt hurt when Josh said, "Drake, get your guitar and leave. I'll let you know when Mindy and I aren't busy any more."

"Fine."

Drake swaggered deliberately over to his bed and picked up his guitar. He took his time walking back across the room and made a point of turning the lock before he pulled the door shut.

He went back downstairs and fooled around with some chords that had been in his head since English class, but it wasn't really coming together until Mindy walked down the stairs and out the front door. He smiled contentedly and started working out the chorus of his new song while he waited for Josh to come find him.

***

They were riding the Demonator again, this time on a parent-sanctioned trip.

Josh was clutching Drake and shrieking like a girl, and Megan wished she had brought her video camera for this. Still pictures just didn't convey how long Drake let Josh cling before he pried him off. Once he did, he draped an arm around Josh's shoulder and patted his arm and, argh, the Boobs were stupid.

She had planned to post this to her website along with a couple of compromising shots of them curled up together on their couch, but she wondered if it was worth the effort.

Drake always had been a little slow, and she found that the best strategy for annoying him was to cause him physical discomfort. Josh, on the other hand, was normally such a self-aware bundle of anxieties that it made her fingers itch to have this one button she couldn't push. She resolved to get past their denial, even if she had to enlist Mindy's help.

***

Some muffled moan or whimper woke Drake up.

The light coming in through the windows was just bright enough for Drake to see the movement under Josh's sheets. His mouth was open and his eyes were closed and his other hand moved absently across his chest. Drake could tell from the sound of his breathing that Josh was getting close. After another soft moan, he shoved the back of his hand against his mouth and his head thrashed from side to side.

Drake was fairly certain that he shouldn't have watched, that if this was the kind of thing Josh talked about, he'd ramble on about privacy and personal boundaries while Drake thought about that strangled little sound Josh had made while biting his fist.

Josh sat up and groped for something to clean himself off with, and then he froze, staring up at Drake. In the dim light, Josh's eyes were dark patches in his face. Drake couldn't see his expression, but he knew that Josh knew that he was awake. He wanted to tell him it was cool, that everybody does it, but he knew how freaked out Josh could get. He was afraid if he said anything at all, Josh wouldn't look at him for a week. They held their gaze longer than Drake thought an embarrassed Josh could, and Drake was the one who finally turned away.

Josh blew out a long breath and scooted to the far side of his bed. He curled up on his side, facing the door, as far away as he could get from Drake. It was a long time before either one of them fell asleep.

***

Clutching the hall pass, Josh strode purposefully down the empty hallway. He never dawdled, and that's why teachers trusted him on errands like this.

Rounding the corner, he saw Drake making out, which shouldn't have surprised him. He couldn't think of anyplace where he hadn't walked in on Drake making out, except for their bedroom, for which he was grateful. So he wouldn't have been surprised, except that Drake was kissing Brian Martinez.

The real shock wasn't even Drake kissing a boy. If Josh had let himself consider the possibility, he would have realized that Drake needed physical contact the way most people need oxygen and that he never had been good at saying no. The shock was how much Brian looked like Josh. He felt like he'd just stepped into an alternate universe where brothers made out in the hallway during third period. From a distance, it could be Josh pressing Drake up against a locker and sliding a knee between his thighs. Drake could be tangling his hands in Josh's hair and gasping into Josh's mouth.

When he realized that either boy might open his eyes at any time, Josh darted back around the corner like he was the one afraid of being caught. It wasn't until the third or fourth time he tried not to remember that he wondered if the similarity had been deliberate.

***

Audrey was dicing onions for the chili when she happened to glance through the kitchen pass-through. Drake and Josh were sitting hip-to-hip on the living room couch. Josh gestured excitedly while he talked.

She moved a little closer. I need the can opener, she told herself.

"…plenty of good schools in California…both be…touring…business degree so I can…you deserve…when you're famous, I'll…amazing…"

She couldn't hear every word, but she didn't need to. For the past month she'd been walking in on Josh having that same conversation with a tense, fidgety Drake. She could tell that something had been resolved because Drake put his hand on Josh's knee and beamed.

Drake leaned closer to Josh, and then his eyes slid over and met hers. His grin faltered for an instant, then broadened again, and he leaned back and said something under his breath that made Josh roar with laughter, and she suddenly had the answer to a question she hadn't even thought to ask.

***

Josh gingerly touched the purple bruise below Drake's eye. "So, how did this happen?"

"Jealous boyfriend."

"Didn't you tell him that you're Drake?" asked Josh sarcastically, as he folded ice cubes inside a damp washcloth. He placed it over Drake's eye, and Drake winced. "Just hold it there. It'll help the swelling. You know, you don't have to kiss every girl you see."

Drake shrugged. "Sometimes kissing just happens."

Josh exploded. "How does kissing just happen? Are you saying that there's some sort of alien experiment where all the hot people have magnets installed in their lips?"

"Dude, you're not even making sense," said Drake, tossing the washcloth on the kitchen table and taking a step towards Josh.

"I'm just saying that you could have a little self-control. You could find out if a girl has a boyfriend before you start kissing her."

"I'm not quite as big slut as you think I am, Joshie. I wouldn't take advantage of someone who didn't want me to." Drake's voice was low and, damn, he was close.

Josh swallowed hard. "So, how do you know?"

Drake grinned. "Well, I'm kind of lazy, so I usually just pick girls who are easy." He tilted his head up towards Josh. "But if I wasn't sure, I think the trick would be to go really slow." He placed a hand on Josh's cheek. "And give the other person plenty of time to back away." He ran his thumb over Josh's lips. "And if he doesn't…." Drake leaned up and kissed Josh.

Hidden in a niche above the microwave, Megan's webcam caught it all.