"We will be the COOLEST AUNTS IN THE UNIVERSE!" Kara declared, raising her glass as high as she could. In doing so, some of the contents of the glass spilled onto the floor. Lena, who had been staring at Kara all night, raised her eyebrows in surprise, amusement and concern.
"Woah, Kara," she laughed. "Steady there."
"Oh, when she's drunk, there's no going back," Alex told the Luthor with a smug little smirk on her face. She'd actually been trying to get Kara drunk again for quite some time, so this little Girls' Night between herself, Kara, and a few of their other closets friends provided a perfect excuse for it. And she had two reasons for wanting to get Kara drunk again. One, Kara hadn't been drunk in quite a while and after everything that had happened with Mon-El, Alex thought that the girl could use a drink. Two, Kara hadn't been drunk in quite a while and Alex found Drunk Kara to be endless entertaining (when nothing serious was going down).
This time, Alex was hoping she might get some of it on camera. In fact, the moment Kara started smiling a bit too widely, Alex had slowly slid her phone out of her pocket and turned it on. Maggie, who was snuggled up at her side, gave her a disapproving look, but there was a twinkle in her eyes and Alex could feel a soft chuckle rumble from her chest. She only shot Maggie a playful wink before turning the phone in Kara's direction. Lena and Sam also caught sight of the phone and gave Alex playfully disapproving looks, but Kara herself seemed totally unaware of what Alex was doing. Instead, she was still slopping what was left of her drink out onto the floor and table.
"We'll be like Super Aunts, and all of us can attend all of Ruby's soccer games and musical performances and we'll each get to be a type of aunt!" Kara continued excitedly.
"Oh? And pray tell, which aunt will you be?" Alex egged Kara on, bringing the phone slightly closer to the intoxicated Kryptonite. It really did amaze her how easily Kara got drunk. Was it just because she was never really much of a drinker and thusly had a low tolerance? Or were all Kryptonians easily intoxicated by alcohol?
"The cool aunt, of course! The coolest of them all! The coolest cool to ever be cooled! I'll be like the north pole!" Kara declared.
"And what makes you think that, Kara?" Alex continued, stifling laughter. Maggie, Lena and Sam wore similar expressions.
"Because I'm Supergirl!" Kara bragged. "How can you get any cooler than that?!" and for a moment, Alex felt her heart stop in her chest. As hilarious as this all was, neither Sam nor Lena knew who Kara truly was, and the fact that Kara had just blurted it out for both of them to hear made Alex terrified. Tomorrow was not going to be pleasant if Kara woke up with a hangover and a confessed identity...
But instead of gasping in shock or horror, Lena and Sam only burst out laughing.
"You're Supergirl?!" Sam crowed.
"Uh huh!" Kara nodded proudly.
"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that," Lena scoffed, rolling her eyes in amusement.
"I AM!" Kara pouted like a child.
"Whatever you say, Kara," Lena replied teasingly.
"You look just like her! Totally!" Sam agreed jokingly.
"Good! I knew you'd think so!" Kara took Sam's remark literally and harrumphed at Lena. "At least someone recognizes me!"
"Whatever you say," Lena repeated, laughing. Behind them both, Sam was nearly in stitches. Kara sounded just like Ruby! How many times had Ruby tried to insist that she would like to be Supergirl someday? Or that Sam, herself, had some sort of special superhero powers? Yeah, right!
For a moment, Alex could only sit there with that horrified expression still on her face, but once she felt Maggie subtly nudge her arm before uttering a hearty bout of laughter herself, Alex quickly composed herself and tried to play along, to keep the lie alive.
"Oh my god, Kara, you really are drunk, aren't you?!" Alex crowed, a bit too loudly, but Kara didn't notice.
"Am not! Kryptonians don't get drunk!" she insisted stubbornly, taking another giant gulp of what little content was left within her glass.
"Oh, don't they?" Lena teased, pretending to be interested by this remark.
"Nope!" Kara promised.
"And you know because...?" Lena asked.
"I already told you! I'm Supergirl!" Kara repeated, but once again, Lena only scoffed and rolled her eyes.
"Sure you are," Alex replied, feeling her heart drop once more, but when still neither Lena nor Sam seemed too concerned with Kara's slurred speeches, Alex felt a bit better and was able to help drunken Kara keep up her charade.
"I am!" Kara repeated again. "You know that, Alex!"
"Well, regardless of that, I'm sure Kryptonians can get drunk! I'm sure that Superman could get drunk if he tried!" Alex continued, trying to change the topic before either Sam or Lena started taking Kara seriously.
"Well why don't we call him and find out?" Kara snarked, then she made to get up and walk over to their apartment's phone, but she tripped over her own feet instead and fell right back down before she was even halfway standing. Alex nearly cried out in relief when Kara managed to fall and hit the floor instead of the table. She had come mere inches from collapsing onto the table, and who knew what might've happened if she'd fallen straight through, breaking the table clean in half? That was something even Alex couldn't explain away.
"Kara!" Lena and Sam both reached out to the face-planted blond.
"Mmmm, my face is warm!" came the muffled reply as both of them tried to see if Kara was ok. Alex, despite her still-racing heart, couldn't help but burst out laughing in reply to this one, and Maggie, Sam and Lena all echoed the sound. Maggie buried her face into Alex's shoulder, laughing up a storm, and Sam had since sat back up, crossing her arms and staring amusedly down at the drunken Danvers. She continued to lay there contentedly before she started moving her arms and legs in a slow, steady rhythm.
"Ummm, Kara? What are you doing?" Sam asked. Since she was the closest to Kara, she noticed this strange motion too. It didn't look like she was trying to move her limbs in order to get up, so what was she-?
"Reverse snow angels!" came the muffled reply. "On my belly!"
"Oh my god," Alex got up off the couch and hurried over to Kara's side so that she could get a better shot of Kara swimming on the carpet, face still buried into it. Maggie did likewise, hopping up from the couch and leaning over to see Kara. Was this going to be her sister in law? Maggie was already looking forward to all the trouble she would cause for, and get into with, Kara...
Suddenly, Kara began to laugh. It was muffled, since she was still face down, but for no apparent reason, she began to laugh and laugh and laugh. It was so random and continuous that soon, everyone else in the room was laughing too. But it was Lena who recovered first, finally taking pity on poor Kara. She leaned over the still-face-planted woman and tapped her back gently.
"Alright, Kara, come on, time for you to get up," Lena said gently, then she grabbed one of Kara's shoulders, her other hand still supporting Kara's back, and she tried to help the poor girl back into an upright position. It took a few seconds, Kara dazedly looking around and protesting that it was too early for her to get up because it was still dark out which meant she should still be sleeping and that she didn't have to go to school yet, but Lena did eventually manage to haul Kara back into a sitting position.
"Alright, there we go!" the Luthor strained a little. Kara almost flopped right back over again, but this time, she collapsed into Lena's arms. The expression Alex caught on her phone would forever be known as Lena's "constipated" or "I don't know what the heck just happened" or "What the heck do I do now?!" face. It would go down in infamy and Alex would make sure she had a thousand different places where the video was stored, just so that if anyone ever deleted one, she'd have 999 more copies to go.
"Mmmm, hey, you're soft and warm!" Kara remarked, then she snuggled deeper into Lena's arms, wrapping her own around Lena's torso. Alex was literally choking on her laughter again, as were Sam and Maggie. Sam's eyes were wide and she covered her mouth to keep from laughing too hard. Maggie looked like Christmas had come early for her. Lena looked just the opposite.
"Ummm, Kara?" she tried to push Kara off of her. When Alex saw, she only shook her head with a pitying smile.
"Oh, Lena, you are never going to be able to get a clingy Kryptonian off of you," she whispered, but only just loud enough for Maggie to hear. Maggie laughed again, but Lena and Sam were too preoccupied with Kara to notice.
"No! Really! You are!" Kara slurred as she felt Lena trying to push her off. "Please, don't push me away!" she begged adorably. "You're so pretty and sweet! And you're like a big, cuddly teddy bear!" she insisted, rubbing her face into Lena's shoulder.
"Oh my god, someone please get her off of me," Lena pleaded, blushing bright red as Kara continued to grin into her shoulder.
"A TEDDY BEAR?! LENA IS LIKE A TEDDY BEAR?!" Alex and Sam were tying for who was laughing harder and louder. To Alex, what made this remark funny was that Lena seemed so standoffish that the idea of her being a teddy bear was like the idea of Kryptonite being good! But to Sam, what made this remark funny was that Lena, underneath her cold exterior, was a big mush, and this title of "teddy bear" was a very apt one indeed. Lena, however, looked mortified, and through her teeth, she told Alex and Sam,
"I'm gonna have to kill both of you!" but her little threat was cut short by Kara, who had begun to speak again.
"Oh, Lena, I love you! I love you so much! I love you, I love you, I love you!" she said.
"Well, yes, Kara, I love you too," Lena admitted, blushing furiously. She was almost as red-faced as Kara, though for different reasons. Then she managed to awkwardly wrap one arm back around Kara and pat her shoulder twice.
"There," she said. "Now, can you please let go of me?"
"No!" Kara smiled, snuggling Lena even tighter.
"Ha! Gaaaaaayyy!" Alex whispered, literally in tears because of how funny she found all of this. She was so going to show Kara this tomorrow!
"Why not?" Lena begged, some of the embarrassment finally fading away into weariness. Although, admittedly, she really liked Kara cuddling her, this was embarrassing and borderline painful! Seriously! Kara's hugs were like death grips. Very warm, well-meant death grips.
"Why would I, when we're going to get married?!" Kara replied.
"WHAT?!" all four of the other women in the room shrieked, but with two different intonations. One was hysteric while the other was totally shocked. Kara finally pulled away from Lena a little bit to address the others. Lena heaved a sigh in relief now that she was able to breathe.
"Yes!" Kara said to the others. "I've decided it now! If we're going to be Ruby's aunts, then it's going to be Alex and Maggie, and then Lena and myself!" Kara looked so pleased with her little idea while Alex could only snort with laughter.
"You come up with that idea all by yourself?" she teased.
"Yuppers!" Kara nodded. Lena's face really was priceless. And the fact that Lena was currently glaring daggers, no, swords, at her and her still-recording phone was only a bonus. A giant bonus. In that moment, Alex found herself just as entrained by the idea of having Lena as a sister in law as Maggie had been about the idea of having Kara as a sister in law.
"And may I ask where on earth you drew that connection from?" Maggie asked Kara at last, interested to see where this would go.
"Whaddaya mean?!" Kara asked, tipping her head comically.
"I mean, why you think it's necessary that we both need to be married before we can be Ruby's aunts?" Maggie pressed.
"Well, because, we also both all gotta be the gay aunts, of course!" Kara said. "We can't do that without getting married!"
"But Kara, I'm not-" Lena began.
"Oh, right, sorry, you're a lesbian," Kara corrected. "L for Lena and L for Lesbian! How could I forget?"
"That's not what I-" Lena tried again, but this time, she was drowned out by Sam, Alex and Maggie.
"Were you planning on doing a double wedding?" Sam decided to be next in line to tease Kara.
"Sam!" Lena whined, looking up at her with pleading eyes. "Don't encourage-"
"Oh! We totally should!" Kara interrupted in sheer delight. "Thank you, Sam! Why don't you be our wedding designer?!"
"I would be honored," Sam teased, but because Kara was so out of it, she began to smile even harder, and she squeezed Lena's shoulder in genuine excitement. Meanwhile, Lena was mouthing, "You're so fired for this!" to Sam.
"Sorry!" Sam whispered back, but she didn't look sorry at all.
"Well, what about you, Sam?" Lena demanded crossly.
"What about me?" Sam asked back, giving Lena a pitying but unyielding smile. This was just too fun to stop!
"What woman will you be marrying, since we're all apparently giant lesbians now!" she snapped. Sam suddenly looked horrified, but it was too late, because Kara had heard. She slapped her forehead.
"YOU'RE RIGHT!" she cried. For a moment, there was only silence as Kara busily thought up a solution...
"OH! I KNOW! I'll call Eve Teschmacher! You'll like her! Really nice girl! And pretty too!" she hopped up again, narrowly missing hitting her knee on the table on the way up. At the rate she was going, she would've sent the whole table right through the roof.
Lena yelped in surprise as Kara released her with such speed that it was her turn to flop over and hit the carpet floor.
"Guess I deserved that," she muttered, but before she could even start to pick herself back up again, she was suddenly dangling two inches off the floor. She yelped again. Alex made the same noise. It was because Kara, seeing that she'd accidently knocked Lena over, had instantly went to pick the woman back up, but her method involved picking her up by the back of the shirt... with one hand. So Lena was now dangling two inches from the floor while being held up by only one of Kara's hands.
"Kara!" Alex said, quickly gesturing for Kara to put Lena back down before Lena realized that she was being supported by only one of Kara's arms. But Lena was too shocked at how quickly it had all happened to even notice, let alone care.
"Kara!" she yelped at the same time, but Kara was oblivious to both of them, suddenly dragging Lena in for another death-hug.
"Oh! Lena! Honey! Baby! Sugar! Sweetheart! Love of my life! I'm so sorry about that!" she cried.
"Wait, what?" Sam, Alex and Maggie all stopped dead.
"Oh, no," Lena suddenly felt herself turning red again, though she wasn't sure if it was from the embarrassment, surprise or from how tightly Kara was hugging her. Seriously! She never realized how much muscle the girl had on her... And then Lena's face began to turn red for yet another reason. This time, it was because she found herself wondering, in a bit too much detail, what all of Kara's muscles looked like...
"Come on, we'll go call Eve together, since you have her number!" Kara insisted. She set Lena back down and began to stumble towards the kitchen, nearly crashing into two chairs and the dining table before Lena could catch her and somewhat support her. Alex twisted around on the couch, still holding up her recording phone. She snickered wickedly as she watched poor Lena trying to help Kara keep from tripping over her own feet, the floor, anything on the floor, and pretty much anything in general. Kara was the kind of girl that was either impossibly graceful and agile, or she was the one that tripped over the air itself. In this instance, she was in the latter state, and Lena was getting to see the full glory of it.
"Come on, Kara, be careful!" she instructed, trying to keep Kara upright.
"Awwww, you care about me!" Kara squealed in delight as they finally reached the kitchen.
"Of course I do!" Lena shot back. Then her face got red again as Kara turned to her with those bright, loving, puppy-like eyes.
As annoying and hilarious as Lena was finding Drunk Kara, there was also something kind of attractive about her... and not just in the physical way, though that didn't even need to be stated. But Drunk Kara was just so innocently sweet, trying to set up Sam with Eve just so all of them would have a wife, and then her trying to set it up so that they would all share the same wedding day! It was totally ridiculous and stupid, but it was a sweet and generous gesture nonetheless. Drunk Kara was actually really adorable. And as Kara paused to look Lena in the eyes, Lena almost thought she saw an understanding, sober, and hopeful sparkle in her sky-blue eyes. What?
"You do? You really do?" she asked, and for a moment, Lena couldn't tell if Kara was drunk, faking it, or being totally sincere. But then she decided it didn't matter. She would give an honest answer now, and then she would ask Kara about it later, once the last of the alcohol had worn off. And if Kara tried to deny that any of this ever happened? Well... Lena had Alex.
"Yes, Kara, I do. I really do," she promised gently.
"Hooray!" Kara threw both of her fists up in the air happily. "I feel like a million, billion, trillion bucks right now!"
"I'm glad to hear it," Lena replied, smiling.
"Great! Now that we are a couple, let's go call Eve!" Kara had instantly snapped back into her delusional fantasy mode, but this time, Lena decided to go along with it, just to see what might happen next...
12 hours later, Kara woke up slowly, groggily.
"Oooof, man, my head! What happened last night?" she slurred. "Did I fight someone? Did I win?"
"Ah, well, you didn't quite fight anyone, but you were certainly very active last night," someone replied.
"Alex?" Kara squinted in confusion. The voice was definitely female, but it didn't sound like Alex. It sounded like-
"Lena," the voice corrected.
"Lena?" Kara spoke the name almost as if she didn't recognize it. She managed to sit up from... her bed. Or at least, it felt like her bed. But how could it be her bed if Lena were here? She rubbed her eyes. Nope. This was her room. And there was Lena. In her room. Sitting on her bed. With her. Not in bed, but sitting right on the edge of it, inches away from Kara... OK! What in Rao's name was going on?!
"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!" Kara panicked into her hands. Although it had taken nearly 15 whole minutes to do so, Lena did finally manage to bring back Kara's memories of last night, and Kara was not happy, to say the least.
"Oh, Lena, I am soooooo sorry about that! I'm so sorry you had to see that! I don't know what came over me! I mean, I know what came over me, but I can't believe it happened like that! Oh, Lena, I'm so sorry! Oh! I must've come off as a complete and utter creep!"
"I wouldn't say that," Lena said, trying to calm Kara back down. "It was definitely a surprise, but it certainly wasn't creepy."
"But I was hugging up on you, and you were trying to push me away," Kara sounded disgusted with herself.
"But you did let go eventually, and you never once went any further than that," Lena promised, knowing what was worrying Kara so much.
"But then, why are you still here? You mean we didn't-?"
"Oh, god, no!" Lena laughed. The expression Kara gave in reply was a mix of relief, embarrassment, and... disappointment?
"So, why are you here, then?" Kara asked. "Did you stay all night?"
"No, Alex asked me to be here for you when you woke up, since she's off enjoying the day with Maggie," Lena replied.
"Oh, so you came to baby me," Kara sounded even more disappointed.
"And I did come to talk about your drunken confession last night," Lena admitted. Now Kara looked mortified.
"I'm not going to yell at you for it," Lena said quickly, seeing the expression of humiliation and shame burn across Kara's face. "I was just going to ask you if you meant any of that. You know, how much of what you said was actually true? And how much was just drunken rambling?"
"None of it," Kara tried to promise. "I meant none of it at all. Come on, Lena, you said so yourself, I was drunk!" but Lena wasn't buying it.
"There was a moment, Kara, a moment between the two of us, when you were just about to call Eve. You looked sincere when I told you that I loved you. Even if you were drunk, was there any truth behind that at all?"
It took about five more minutes of gentle coaxing, but Lena finally got her answer: Yes. Yes it was. Kara had been in love with Lena for quite awhile now, but because of her recent breakup with Mon-El, she hadn't ever really felt ready or comfortable pursing a relationship. Even now, there was still some hesitancy on her part. But it was nothing Lena had done. It was all Kara.
"And the only reason I never told you sooner was because I wasn't sure I was ready to," she admitted. "I am sorry you had to hear it that way..."
"Well, don't worry, I'm not," Lena promised gently. "I'm just glad you told me at all, and if I am still on your radar, I would be willing to wait, however long it took. You don't need to rush into anything now, especially not with me. I had hoped you would've known that by now..."
There was nothing but pure compassion in Lena's voice as she reassured Kara that she had not taken the confession as a sign of drunken rambling, or of stupidity, or of Kara's own loneliness or desperation. Nor had she taken it as a solid proposal. Instead, she had taken it as an option, a suggestion, an alert to a possible future relationship. And it was one she did indeed want to pursue, but only when Kara was ready, and not a single second before. Kara had never been quite so happy or relieved.
"Thanks, Lena, it means a lot to me," she said, this simple statement referring not just to Lena's understanding and patience, but also to the other nearly two good years of friendship they'd already shared. Kara had a lot to thank Lena for, and this little moment right now was just another shining example. But, just like always, Lena humbly brushed it aside.
"It's you, Kara, you're worth it," she promised, gently clasping Kara's hand in her own. There was nothing romantic about that gesture. At least not yet. But, in due time, when Kara would finally get over the last of her regrets and worries about Mon-El, it would be. Then, when they would hug or hold hands, it would have since taken on a new dimension.
But Lena would never let Kara live down the fact that their wonderful relationship had bloomed out of a drunken confession. Nor would she ever let Kara live down Alex's video. She had actually managed to download and save it quite a few times herself, so if Alex's entire collection somehow got destroyed, Lena had plenty copies of her own too.
"Urrrrrgghhhhh!" Kara moaned in embarrassment as Lena playfully played Alex's video on the large monitor in her office at L-Corp. For once, it was just the two of them, Sam at a conference somewhere else.
"Classic," Lena replied as the video finally ended.
"I hate you," Kara muttered.
"I love you too," Lena grinned, walking over to the blushing blond and kissing her cheek. Her face got even redder, but she did not hesitate to return the kiss. Lena smiled. She wasn't sure what she liked more: teasing Kara, or kissing her. They were both pretty great in her book!
"I just wish you didn't have to rub it in my face," Kara pouted.
"It's too funny not to," Lena replied. "I mean, I never realized how loopy you could be! Hugging me, planning weddings, trying to convince Sam and I that you were Supergirl," Lena listed off. Upon hearing that last one, Kara's blood suddenly ran cold and she began to fiddle with her glasses, giving off a nervous laugh.
"Ha, ha, yeah," she grinned. "I sure am stupid when I'm drunk, aren't I?" and she was forever grateful that Alex had been able to help her keep her cover while she was drunk and shouting it out for the world to hear.
"Yeah, but that would be silly, wouldn't it?" Lena agreed.
"What? Me being Supergirl? Of course! Don't be ridiculous! That's crazy talk!" Kara agreed heartily. A little bit too heartily. But Lena made no other visible motion other than to shrug and smile before turning the monitor off.
AN: Leapyearbaby29, here's your Drunk Kara, Supercorp fanfic. It's an AU off that scene in 3x04 where Kara gets to stay and continue to have her Girls' Night with the others instead of going off to fight crime.