Save The Last Dance
Extended Summary: Steve Randle was drafted in the fall of 1966. He was captured by Vietcong five months after he was deployed into the heart of the war. Back home in Tulsa, emotions ran deep as word hit them that their friend, their brother, their constant, may never come home alive. Three years later, Sodapop decided to enlist, tired of his fate being in the hands of Uncle Sam. As his tour was about to come to an end a year later, Steve I found, very much alive. As luck would have it, there were many challenges to be overcame. Were they strong enough to help Steve and Soda adjust back to civilian life? Was Steve strong enough to face the horrors of what had happened over seas? Did Roxanne give up on ever telling Steve how she felt, or did her feelings run deeper than the ever for the young man who stayed strong for her all those years ago while she was serving time?
I was reflecting on everything that had happened over the last five years, while I was trying to pull together a dinner for the guys when a knock came from the front door. I hesitated. Darry and Ponyboy were both at work still, a glance at the clock verified that. Darry wouldn't be home until 6 at the soonest and Pony was working late at the bowling alley and wouldn't be home until well after dinner. Two-Bit never knocked and no one else ever came around. No one ever knocked and with Pony being 18, social services never came around.
The only people who would have knocked were the fuzz or the military men that go door to door to tell families that their brothers, sons, fathers, whatever, weren't coming home.
So I hesitated. The knocking came again. And again. And again until I finally took a deep breath and went to the front door. I couldn't see a car through the curtains, so I was even more jumpy. Everyone knew the house was normally empty during the day. I had gotten off work early because Soda was due to come home in a couple days and I wanted to get the house ready for him. No one knew I would be home.
"C'mon Roxy, I know you're in there, Darry told me to look for Steve's car!" a voice chimed. I blinked. There was no way in hell I was hearing who I thought I was.
I pulled the door open and practically screamed when I saw my baby sister, no longer a baby, standing there, a huge smile on her face. She was 8 years old, but looked so much older. Her brilliant green eyes, her long, strawberry blonde curls, curls she inherited from our mother, her thin, yet strong build. She looked so much older than merely 8.
"Glory Roxanne, what'd ya do, stop eatin' all this time?" her accent was an awkward cross between a southern drawl and the fast talkin' of the Northeast.
"What're you doing here?" I asked, still not sure she was really standing there. I felt almost like I did when I saw Mr. Randle sitting there on visitor's day. "I thought you got adopted by some folks up in New York?"
"You idiot," Rosemary chuckled. "Daddy never woulda signed away his rights to me, no how!" She broke up laughing at that. "I was in foster care up till a week ago. Do you remember Jenny and Riley?"
"Our cousins from Texas or Kansas or somethin' like that?" I asked, trying my hardest to remember. Riley and Jenny were about 5 years older than me. They were good kids, woulda been Socs if they lived in a city big enough.
"Kansas," she nodded, her curls bouncing. "Well daddy went to live with 'em after ma died and they made him sober up. He's doin' real good now. Holdin' a job, happy, real good. So I finally got to go back to live with 'im. Told him I needed to see you 'fore I did though. So I called Darry and him and daddy set up the visit. I only get to stay for tonight, then Jenny is gonna swing by and pick me up. Guess she had business she had to take care of here or something. She didn't mind bringing me one bit!"
"Well, this sure is a mighty fine gift," I said, tears in my eyes. I pulled her in for a tight hug.
"I'm not your gift, silly," she said brightly. "Darry told me everything. Well, Two-Bit and Pony did on the ride over anyway." I cut her off at that.
"But they're all at work," I said knowingly.
"Nuh-uh. They wanted it to be a surprise. Everyone's in the backyard already," she grinned up at me with a smile that made me think about Sodapop.
I followed her through the house to the backyard. She pushed the door open and I was nearly knocked to the ground by a blur of fur and slobber.
"Chaos, down boy," Pony's voice came. I felt the fur lift off my chest. I sat up, shocked to see a huge, jet black puppy looking at me, dark chocolate eyes dancing with life and happiness.
"Darry said you haven't been the same since everything happened and daddy found a real nice guy with pups for sale, said he wanted to make everything up to ya somehow," Rose explained. "So I asked Darry if he minded another mouth to feed around here."
"You got me a dog?" I asked skeptically. The last time I had a dog, our father had taken it out to the woods and killed it for eating his favorite pair of shoes.
"I thought you liked dogs?" Rose said with a pout. She looked absolutely adorable.
"I do," I reassured her. I wasn't sure what I was feeling. Then I saw it. I saw the scrap of cloth and was tied around the dogs neck.
"Where did you get that?" I demanded. I grabbed the dog and pulled it into my lap, tracing the patterns in the cloth. Red flannel.
"Darry said it would make a good bandana," she replied. She looked confused. I looked up at Darry, unable to explain the emotions going through my mind.
"Thank you," I whispered, holding the dog tightly in my lap. He wiggled against my grip before he relaxed. I gave Darry a look. He knew I was onto him. He knew I knew he knew something. But that wasn't the time to get into things. Instead, we spent the rest of the night talking, looking at pictures and enjoying the simple things in life. I told her stories about what our parents were like when we were little, how Josiah loved horses more than anything in the world, how losing her was the hardest moment of my life. I told her how much I loved her. I think I told her that more that night than I ever did in our entire lives together. Glory, words couldn't describe how wonderful it felt to have my baby sister back in my arms. I held her close late into the night, whispering sweet nothings in her ear until she fell asleep. Then I sang to her. I sang her all of our ma's favorite songs. Tears welled in my eyes as I settled her in for the night. I wish I could have held onto that night for the rest of my life. Freeze it and never have to leave that happy, bittersweet moment. That night, I slept on the floor with Rose in my arms, Chaos at our feet.
Morning came all too soon and before I knew it, Jenny was waiting in her car, flirting with Darry while I said my goodbyes to my baby sister. I cried as hard as she did when we hugged as tight as we dared. Saying goodbye to her again felt just a awful as it did all those years ago. But it was for the best. She had a bright future ahead of her and I wasn't about to get in the way of that. She could be anything she set her mind to and I would give my life to ensure that.
"You can come with me," she said, almost begging me to pack up and move with her. "Daddy isn't mean no more."
"I have a life here, Rosemary," I said as lightly as I could. "This is where I'm needed."
"I dig that," she nodded. "But Jenny said if you ever find yourself needin' somewhere to go, our door's always open, savvy?"
"Yeah," I nodded, giving her a tight hug. "I love you Rosie Posie, pudding pie. If you ever need me, you call, okay?"
"I will Roxy. Stay strong, it's gon' be okay," she said with a smile. "I love you sissy."
"I love you more," I waved as she climbed into Jenny's Impala. With a honk and a wave, they sped down the old road. I watched until their car turned and I could no longer see it. I felt like I was letting a huge part of my heart drive away right then, but I was reminded of how much I was needed here when I felt the puppy lick my hand. I looked down, tracing the piece of fabric still tied to his neck.
I wanted to corner Darry and demand he tell me what he knew, but I didn't have the heart to ruin my own mood just yet. Instead, I walked the dog into the backyard and sat down in the grass, letting the dog cuddle up in my lap. I sat there for hours, soaking in the silence. No one dared to approach me. I think deep down, they all knew I needed the time to gather my thoughts. The thinking and silence gave me both comfort and fear. I was afraid of what the next few months had to offer. I was scared senseless of what Soda would be like when he came home, even more so with Steve. I kept wondering if maybe his feelings had dwindled. I kept wondering if maybe it was silly to hold onto a conversation that lasted for only a moment, yet that moment changed my life in so many ways.
"That's Steve's shirt," I said softly to the dog as if he could understand. "I went looking for it years ago, wanted it as a reminder, ya know?" The dog let out a soft whine. "Steve said he thought he was in love with me," I told the dog as if he could understand a word I was saying. Boy did I feel silly just then. "Darry knows somethin'…he wouldn't have used it if he didn't."
"You're right," Darry said. I saw him crossing the yard, a letter in his hands. "Do you want the good news or the bad news first?"
"Shoot, give me the good news," I said cautiously. My heart felt like it was racing a mile a minute. I felt sweat start to pour down my back.
"Soda's train comes in at 6 tomorrow morning. We have to be at the station by 5 if we want to see him in," he said carefully. "Soda said he's ready to come home and be with the family. Said he's happy it's over."
"And the bad news?" My voice cracked. This couldn't be good.
"I wasn't done with the good news," he said with a smirk. Darry rarely smiled, even more so since Soda enlisted. "Soda went and got his leg broke so that was why he was gone longer than expected," he explained. "He's fine, but he won't be winning any races no time soon."
"The bad news?" I said again. I knew he was trying to distract me. It wasn't working. I knew Soda was fine. Unlike Darry, I was home when he called the morning before. I already knew about the broken leg.
"Steve…" I felt my heart skip a beat. "Steve's not so good," he finally said. "Soda said he's not in a good place at all…he's coming home tomorrow, but they want him to go straight to the hospital from the station," he went on. "Soda said he isn't sure if we'll be able to see 'im before he leaves."
"How bad," I managed to ask. My voice broke again. I felt sick. All these years worrying, just to be told we still can't see him. I was good and tired of constantly getting bad news as soon as I got good news. The happiness from seeing my sister was gone as quick as it came. Chaos nudged me but I found myself suddenly hating the mutt that sat in my lap.
"Soda didn't say. All I know is it's not looking too good," Darry came and sat next to me. I knew this was hard for him too. He always seemed to be carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.
"A wise man once told me, that no matter what happened in this life, the most stubborn, most ornery pony could be broken, s'long as the rider did his part. That no matter how dark the days may seem, the sun will shine again," I said carefully. I smiled sadly up at Darry. He remembered the conversation too. His father, a wise man of few words, sat us older kids down when his father, Darry's grandfather, passed away. He was trying to get us to understand that while it was a sad time, we could get through it, however, for me, I took more away from the conversation than the boys did. I had asked him later what he meant and while he told me he was just trying to remind us to stay strong and stay happy, he also wanted us to remember that we all had jobs to do. We all had our role in making the world a better place for those around us.
"Maybe he's right," Darry said, looking up at the sky. The clouds were tinted pink and purple from the sunset. We lapsed into a comfortable silence after that. Sometimes it scared me how close I had grown to Darry and Ponyboy after Soda left. Maybe I did it because I grew up with them and they were the brothers I had known and loved my entire life. Maybe I did it so I didn't wind up alone, chasing an early grave. Or maybe I did it because deep down, I knew we'd be leaning on one another, no matter where life took us.
Either way, none of us slept much that night. Pony was too excited to get his favorite person back. God, he missed his brother more than anything in the world. Darry? Well Darry didn't sleep 'cause he was too busy worrying. About me, about Soda, about Pony, about Steve. Darry, well Darry spent the night pacing, muttering to himself, worrying himself sick. And me? I didn't dare sleep. I didn't dare face the nightmares that plagued me every time I closed my eyes. No one really knew how bad they were. I tried to push off sleep as long as I could because of them. Those last four years, I went days on end without sleeping, just to avoid the nightmares. That night was no different. I didn't dare close my eyes. I didn't want to face the nightmares. I couldn't. Looking back, I think the nightmares were the least of my worries.
A/N - As promised, here is the introduction to book two! If you didn't read "Ties That Bind Us" it wouldn't hurt to do so, but honestly, I'm making this so it isn't too hard to pick up without reading the first story! Reviews are always appreciated and feedback keeps me going!