It all started with an innocent radio.

The young Belarusian woman sat at her kitchen table, sharpening her knives to make dinner. After that, she would use them to make Big Brother marry her. She had been quite unsucessful as of late. How was she going to make him become one? It wasn't as if he stayed around to listen to her knives and chants. Perhaps she needed a different way to persuade him.

But for now, it was silent. Leaning over, she turned the knob on the radio-but instead of some good ole heavy rock, she got this… pop crap.

"And right now, you're listening to the Canadian sensation, Justin Bieber!" At this, Belarus scoffed. Before she could switch it, the girlish voice started singing. The words ran through her head, and struck something in her.

And that's when she knew it. She knew what she was going to do to get Big Brother Russia to marry her. And it would work. There was no way it couldn't. Now, all she needed was a boom box…

One hour later…

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Russia groaned, rolling over to the alarm clock. It was 12:30 at night! What bird would be insane enough to disturb his sleep? With a heavy sigh, he shuffled over to the balcony to close the doors-but left them open.

On his lawn was Belarus. Holding a boom box over head.

You can't blame him for thinking his little sister was going to throw it at him.

Before he could slam the doors shut, she pressed the button, and synthesizer music started playing. His face turned into one of pure horror as she started serenading him.

"I know you love me, I know you care-"

"N-not like that!"

"Just call whenever, and I'll be there-"

"M-maybe I'll call someone else, d-da?"

"You are my love, you are my heart, and we will never, ever be apart, brother…"

"GAAAAHHHH! HELP!" If the neighbors didn't hear them now, the chorus would surely wake them. And Russia was getting more scared by the second.

"Marry me, marry me, marry me, ohhhh, like, marry me, marry me, marry me, ohhhh, like, marry me, marry me, marry me, ohhhh… and we'll all become one, ohhhh…"

"NEVER!" He shrieked, as his sister started to sing louder and started to walk closer and closer. What was this nightmare?!

"Oh, for you, I would've done whatever, and I just can't believe that we aren't one together," she started twirling her knives, and Russia shouted, "I-I don't want to see all the things you've done, da?"

"And I'm trying to play it cool, but I'm losing you. I'll buy you anything-I'll buy you a ring!"

"N-nyet! I REFUSE THIS PROPOSAL! N-no ring!" If this wasn't extremely scary before, it was now. Especially when she picked up the chorus and made her way to the house.

"Marry me, marry me, marry me, ohhhh, like, marry me, marry me, marry me, ohhhh, like, marry me, marry me, marry me, ohhhh… and we'll all become one, ohhhh…"

"NOOOOOOOOO!

Oh, Belarus… maybe you'll want to hold off on the wedding plans-or having Justin Bieber sing at the wedding, too.

In the sparse neighborhood, with grand houses, spaces far away from each other, neighbors had a hard time hearing each other. But Belarus and Russia had been loud enough to catch the attention of Canada and America.

Standing on his brother's porch, America laughed as Belarus kept walking and singing with that boom box, while Russia was screaming his head off. Finally, Canada nudged him. "I-it's not polite to laugh at R-Russia's troubles, Al."

The American shrugged, and said, "Eh, better him than us. And weren't you the one who brought Justin Bieber into the world?"

Canada sighed. No one would ever let go of that, would they? "W-well, I can tell you one th-thing…

She's got a-a bad case o-of Bieber fever…"

"True dat."