Disclaimer: I don't own or have anything to do with Roswell the TV show. So don't sue.
Summary: Liz deals with Max's death.
Category: Max/Liz
Rating: PG
Author's Note: I needed to write this after watching Max die. Hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think.
Chapter One:
"Oh God." She sobbed covering her mouth with her hands to stifle the moan that invaded her. Everything inside her screamed out with the injustice. How is it possible? How can it be true? And yet she knew it was true. He's really gone. "No!" Liz roared covering her mouth with her hands as she frantically wiped at the tears streaming down her face.
She took a deep breath, looking around her at the others in the room. She wanted to scream, to let them know that their lost could never compare to the blind anguish cursing through her. That they didn't understand. But she knew deep down that the group around her loved him and was mourning his loss as well. So she swallowed the resentment that rose inside her.
Blinking back the tears she turned from her friends. The only people in the world who knew that he was really gone. How could she face them? They all knew that she'd left him. How could she be so stupid?
Running her hands over her face she turned away unable to face them. Her chest heaving with the pain surging throughout her she ran out of Michael's apartment, down the street. She didn't know where she was going; she just needed to get out of there. Away from the faces of the people who loved Max.
Sobbing Liz ran blindly, making her way through the streets of Roswell. Her body trembling from the pain surging inside her she raced on unaware of her surroundings.
Her exhausted body heaving she fill to the ground, her wail echoing through the air around her. Wiping the tears from her face she looked up staring blindly into the darkness. Her breath caught in her throat when she realized that she was kneeling in front of Alex's grave. What had brought her here she didn't know, but she felt comforted in the knowledge that in her darkest moments Alex's was still a beacon in the dark.
Taken deep breaths she held a hand over her heart, her chest heaving from lack of oxygen. "Oh Alex…" She moaned wiping at the tears coursing down her face. "He's gone. He's really gone." She cried. "I feel so empty. So incomplete." She moaned.
Taking another deep breath she looked around her. Really looked around her for the first time. Death! That's what this place emulated. Death! Why was she here? Why did fate direct her to Alex's grave?"
"No!" She screamed into the silence night. "I won't let you win." She yelled as she got to her feet. "We won't let you win." She sobbed covering her face with her hands.
"You won't let who win, Liz." The question seemed to come out of nowhere. Looking around her startled, her heart pounding Liz surveyed the area around her.
"Who said that?" She demanded.
"You won't let who win?" The question echoed in the dark.
"Alex…" Liz moaned her heart throbbing in her chest. "Your dead. Your not really here." She demanded turning to where the sound of his voice had emulated.
He stood before her as if he were really there, not a figment of her imagination. He looked like he had the last time she'd seen him. So happy, so full of life.
"Alex…" She moaned.
"Concentrate." The imagine before her said. "Concentrate. Close your eyes and think Liz."
"I don't understand." Liz yelled. "What are you trying to say?"
"No one has every been connected to him as you have. Do you feel him? Is he really gone?" Alex smiled as he raised his hand toward her. "Don't believe what you see, what you hear around you. Concentrate… Liz. Is he really gone?"
"I don't understand, Alex what are you trying to tell me?" She begged. "He's gone… he's gone." She cried dropping to her knees sobbing.
"Close your eyes Liz. Concentrate… on Max… connect with him." Alex encouraged her.
"I can't… Alex… I can't he's….he's… gone. Oh, God." She sobbed. "He's dead."
"Concentrate…try Liz…try.."
Taken a deep breath Liz closed her eyes willing her heart to slow its racing tempo. "Concentrate…connect with him." Alex's voice echoed around her. Clearing her mind she concentrate on Max. The feel of him, his smile, his scent, anything that reminded her of him.
Nothing! She felt nothing. She couldn't feel him anymore. He was really gone, really dead. Her heart raced as she took another deep breath willing a connection to Max. Willing for any sign that they were all wrong, that he is alive. That he needed them to save him from whatever hell he was in.
It invaded her so quickly she fall flat on her back. The energy pushed its way throughout her body, rushing inside her causing her breath to lodge in her chest. "Max…" She moaned tears running down her cheeks. 'I love you.' The words slammed into her so forcefully she arched her body from the impact. Drawing huge amount of air into her starving lungs she struggled to her feet, her heart beating wildly. 'I'm still here.' the voice echoed in her head. 'I'm still here.'
"Oh my God." Liz moaned wiping frantically at the tears blindly her. "He's alive. He's alive." She shouted her heart pounding. "He's alive."
TBC