Family is important, especially for the Kamiya family. My father and even my mother when she was alive stressed this importance to me.
I hold dearly to me the values instilled in me by my mother and father.
Sadly the winter I turned 15, my mother had offered to house some men seeking shelter from the cold. At first my father had welcomed people into the home freely , he trusted my mother.
That day was coming to a close when the group of men challenged my father and held a sword to my mothers throat demanding money as they held me back .
The men took what they wanted and left emotional scars for our family . My mother soon suffered spells of anxiety and would break down ever so often and my father would come rushing to her side to comfort her. It eventually led to her death a few years later .
My father vowed that things would change in our household and therefore became very strict.
"Kaoru study your sword technique , you must be strong"
Such words became habitual of him and enstilled in it I became. I felt more of a son and less of a daughter most days , he soon started to call me his hunting companion when we'd go beyond our home walls . Maybe he did so for my protection, I just never has the courage to question him.
With my hair pulled back and scruffy appearance I appeared to some to be somewhat masculine.
I look up and see his eyes analyzing me , "What are you thinking my daughter?"
It caught me off guard, straightening my stance I shrug , "About food ?"
He chuckles and shakes his head , "With that type of answer I'd almost suspect you of being my son "
I shake my head I know he's only trying to ease the tension .
"Father" I sigh and let out the breath I'd been holding in.
He looks amused at me , "Well it's enough practice for today now go run along with the rest of your chores. If anyone comes to the entrance"
"Then I report back to you " , I roll my eyes ,"I know father"
He did not say anything more , he turned away .
I understand why he feels like he must protect me but have I not trained my whole life to protect myself? We are the family whose sword does not kill but protects. Am I not capable of protecting myself .
I walk out of the dojo, sighing to myself . If only mother was here, she made him so happy, he did not use to be this way.
I start hanging up the laundry in the back , keeping aware of my surroundings , habitually of course , I just feel the need to be aware of everything happening .
The breeze feels nice and somehow I feel a lot like my mother in this moment . Less attractive of course but nonetheless like her.
Recently my father had given me an azure amulet that belonged to her which she had given to him. I cannot help but feel closer to her as it press it close to my heart. I know though that I will have it temporarily for although my father is strict he wants me to get a husband.
The village believes in giving an amulet to your lover so one day I will have to hand it over to some man whom I'm not really sure I want to marry.
I love this amulet but it carries also this heavy burden in my chest, the hint of fear . I know my father wants best for me but he also doesn't want me to die alone either.