The Time Deadpool Listened to Hallelujah, a deadpool fanfic

Author's Note: I do not claim to own Deadpool. This is purely for fun. I hope you enjoy, Kate Voegele singing Hallelujah was my favorite version ever.

The Time Deadpool Listened to Hallelujah

Deadpool was especially excited today. He downloaded all his favorite songs as he recently bought himself an iPod. All the kids had it, why not him? Oh yeah, he was just kicking back when he realized he accidentally downloaded a song he had never listened to before: Hallelujah (Kate Voegele). It really seemed to be lacking the insanity he so craved in everything he does, but he gave it a shot anyways. The track began to play.

Well, I've heard there was a sacred chord

David played, and it pleased the Lord

"Who's David?"

But you don't really care for music, do ya?

"Why would I have an iPod if I didn't?"

Well, it goes like this; the fourth, the fifth

The minor fall and the major lift

The baffled king composing Hallelujah

"I don't recall asking you how it goes..."

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

"Sing it, sista!"

Your faith was strong, but you needed proof

You saw her bathing on the roof

Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew ya

"How do you know about Syrin? When I was on the roof, I thought I got away with it!"

Then she'd tie you to her kitchen chair

She broke your throne she cut your hair

And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

"Whoa whoa whoa, that's not how it went down and I thought songs like these were supposed to be PG13? Crank it down a notch, girl!"

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

"MmmHmm, baby! Sing it!"

Baby, I've been here before

I've seen this room and I've walked this floor

You know, I used to live alone before I knew ya

"Wait, did you live here? Did I somehow lead you to meet guys? What the - "

And I've seen your flag on the marble arch

"I have a flag with my face...mask? Cool!"

And love is not a victory march

It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

"You can say that again...wait, can we get back to the whole living with me thing?"

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

"Again with this…."

Well, there was a time when you let me know

What's really going on below

But now you never show that to me, do ya

"Angel, please! At least wait until I get the shackles and honey ready!"

And remember when I moved in you

The holy dove was moving too

And every breath we drew was Hallelujah

"My ego thanks you, but can we move on to the issue that I remember none of this? What was your name again?"

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Oh yeah

"Ms. Hallelujah, can we talk privately, please?"

Well, maybe there is a God above

But all I've ever learned from love

Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew ya

"So I'll know I don't need to give you shooting lessons later. Can we please - "

And it's not a cry that you hear at night

It's not somebody who's seen the light,

It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

"Look now, if you don't answer me, SO HELP ME I'LL - "

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Deadpool grew more and more annoyed with this mystery woman who he apparently slept with and now loves him.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Our anti-hero's patience thins.

Oh yeahhh

BANG! Deadpool got up and shot his own iPod. He mourns the loss of his many loved songs and background music, but celebrates the fact that he was free from one of the women who fall at his feet once more. Or so he thinks …

Deadpool was walking down the street when from a kid's radio he hears:

"Next on the Top Ten Count Down: Hallelujah by: Kate Voegele"

"GREAT LOVE OF THE CHURCH BUFFET TABLES! MoonSpider! Get me out of here!"

Um … yeah, good luck with that …