Admiral Kirk listened attentively to his kind friend Leonard H. McCoy. He was making sense of course but how on Earth do I get back in the saddle again. Did I even want too. He was right as usual, always seeing things when I didn't. He was a man that would tell it as it is. No beating around the bush, that wasn't his way, and Jim Kirk appreciated that. Even though it hurt to listen to it.
"Jim get back your command, get it back before you turn in to part of this collection. Before you really do grow old."
"I hear you Bones. I'll think about it all right?" Jim looking a little sad staring more at this drink than his friend.
"Well, you do just that. Don't take forever to make up your mind though, your only young once you know."
"Don't I know it." said Jim getting up from his chair.
Jim downed the rest of his drink, and swore never to drink Romulan Ale again.
McCoy looked at him as he got up and asked the next question.
"So, hobgoblin didn't come to see you?"
Annoyed with the name calling Jim channeled his anger through his voice.
"Don't call him that." said Jim a little too loud.
"Sorry, old habits die hard. You guys were really tight for the longest time. I had thought he would have been here to wish you Happy Birthday."
"Spock is Spock Bones. He may just consider a birthday as being illogical. Don't judge ok. He is a good friend."
"I never said he wasn't." said McCoy joining Jim at the window as they both stared at the view.
"Then why are you always on his case?" Jim said his voice less harsh.
"Just that I know what he means to you, and birthday or no he would have been here."
"He has to get ready for Enterprise's inspection, he is just doing his duty."
"Perhaps, but when you mean a lot to someone as Spock does to you, you find a way to get around duty Jim." said McCoy looking at his friend his hand touching his shoulder in affection.
"I'll see him when I see him Bones, what difference does it make?"
"It makes a big difference to you. You are his best friend and vice versa. Don't you think it's about time you admit the truth Jim." said the good doctor waiting for another harsh word.
Jim looked at Bones as if he grew two heads.
"Am I supposed to understand what you are trying to get at." said Jim a little annoyed.
"It's simple if you would get your visor off and accept the truth."
"I am intrigued Bones, what are you trying to tell me. For someone that I really believed in not beating around the bush you going against your motto."
"All right if that is what it takes to get through to you. You James Kirk have feelings for Spock and you have denied it for years. When will you finally admit the truth, if not to yourself at least to me."
Jim listened and couldn't find a way to crush his friends statement. He was getting too old to fight.
"What am I but an old fool who has lost his youth. Has no clue where it has gone. Goes on day by day to fill that hole wondering if that day will ever come." said Jim pensive.
"Is that a poem Jim?"
"No, Bones just how I feel."
"Well, knowing you Jim as I do you usually don't leave things unresolved. Don't you ever wish things could be different?"
"Bones, I never told you this," said Jim staring at his friend instead of the view. "I tried, on are final days aboard the Enterprise I was with Spock in my quarters and when I asked him what was his future he said he was unsure. I told him if I ever get the chance to captain her again would you follow me. He said he'd follow me anywhere. That statement alone sent shivers down my spine and decided to take a chance. I touched his hand, very intimately and he pulled away. I guess he could sense what I was feeling when I touched him. After that he was distant, and then I was promoted to Admiral and he went to Gol to pursue Kohlinarr. He has never been the same since. I thought after the V'Ger incident things would have been different but he was so engrossed in his work he didn't have time for anything else. So I am where I am Bones, behind a desk job that I thought I'd swore I'd never return."
"I didn't know Jim. I just wished things would be more amicable between you to. You have such a history together."
"Don't I know it. I'd do anything for him Bones, I care for him so much, but friendship is all we have and I am happy with that."
"It's getting late Jim. Will you be all right? I have to go.' said McCoy gently.
"Of course I will. We Kirks are a tough lot."
"I don't doubt that for a minute. Goodnight Jim, and Happy Birthday." said McCoy.
They embraced in a crushing hug and McCoy left Jim with his thoughts.
Moments later the buzzer rang and Jim went to answer it.
"Coming. Is that you Bones, did you come back to steal my Romulan Ale?"
The doors open to reveal a handsome Vulcan in civilian clothing.