The Phone Call

By: Sapphire

AN: I like this. I really do. One of my very first fics, and indeed my favorite. I have always been a Mary-Sue kinda girl... and I just like this fic. It's simplistic and leaves a lot to be questioned, but one day I'll have the Sapphire saga up and it will all make sense.

Disclaimer: I wrote this oh... about three years ago. I don't own Digimon, Star Wars, Harry Potter, or basically anything else. This is a short Mary- Sue fic. It was written for my friends, and thus involves their Mary-Sues (and I like using "thus"). I hope you enjoy it, because it's simple, trivial, and involves "The Coruscant Hotline". We all love The Coruscant Hotline. While I don't own Coruscant, I own The Coruscant Hotline. If it is imperative you must use The Coruscant Hotline, drop me a line at: Licorice-Sama@galataeiasplace.zzn,com ... I may allow you to use it, if you give it proper disclaimer... because I'm one of those little witches that gets mad when you steal my stuff. Well, enough yammering, just remember: me no own, you no sue.

Rating: PG... I would say G, but you know, I think "shut up" qualifies as enough to earn this a PG... it's just a rude little saying, as my elementary school teachers told me. ^.^

Dedicated To: Zodica and Eclipse, for being my first Mary-Sue buddies, and Clare Ishida/Maxwell of LTOI and CFL and Umifuu, for the whole "small hair" bit. It earned me many a laugh in the good ole days. lol. Also to all the diehard Digi-fans who stuck around, even though 03 was, let's face it, pretty much crap. Oh sure, Ryo wasn't so bad, but we need that bishie-boy Yamato, and some good old-fashioned Taito to get us through the series! TAITO! TAITO! TAITO! (Yeah, I'm pro-yaoi and a Mary-Sue... not many of us out there, is there? hehe.) Also, to MattyBunny... you serve no purpose in this fic, other than I love you.

Positively NOT Dedicated To: The Marquis de Lafayette. I hope he falls down!

"Look what I brought!" Sapphire squealed excitedly, short blonde hair bouncing. She was a French-British witch who lived in New Orleans.

"It's a phone." Eclipse Casto, her best friend, said. She was also a witch... and a general. Just don't ask, it's inconceivable. Sapphire had recently turned eleven, and Eclipse was ten. "What do you need a phone for?" Eclipse asked.

"Simple," Sapphire said, smiling mischievously, "pranks."

" I like your thinking." Eclipse replied with a mischievous grin, matching the evil twinkle in Sapphire's turquoise-blue eyes.

Sapphire hooked the phone up to the jack in the small clubhouse. She was thankful her dad had paid for the jack to be installed. For a wizard, he sure was pretty schooled with the wonderful world of Muggle gadgets. They waited... and waited... and waited. Finally, Sapphire spoke.

"Who in their right mind would call a shack in the middle of New Orleans anyway? This was a stupid idea."

"Yeah. Let's go see how far we can chuck this machine into the Mississippi!" Eclipse reasoned.

"Yeah!" Sapphire agreed excitedly.

Then the phone rang. Sapphire grabbed the receiver and pressed it to her ear.

***

"Hello?" Matt asked, speaking into the pay phone's receiver. "Hello?" he said again. Maniacal giggling was heard on the other end of the line. Matt ran a gloved hand through his hair, thinking about his lovely oven mitts.(1)

"Whoa!" Matt said, "what planet did I just dial?" He heard even more evil giggling. He was starting to get very spooked when a voice suddenly piped up in a cheery, feminine timbre, slightly flavored with Southern US accent.

"Hello, thank you for calling Coruscant. For the Jedi Temple, press one now. For the-" Matt pressed one, unsure of what else he should do. His lapis eyes were dark with confusion. Suddenly, another voice came on the phone. It was still feminine, but somewhat harsher and deeper.

"Thank you for calling the Jedi Temple. If you would like to speak with a Master, press one now. If you would like to register as a Padawan, press two now. If you are a Master looking for a Padawan, press-" Matt pressed one. Maybe someone could tell him just what was going on. This time, the voice was the same voice as earlier. He liked this voice better, it seemed more friendly and jovial.

"Hello, you have reached the Jedi Masters. For Master Yoda, press one now. For Master Mace Windu, press two now. For Master Tahl, press three now. For Master-" Matt pressed one. The voice switched back to the harsh, dictator-like alto. He had thought it was the same person doing both voices, but now he was sure there were two operators.

"Thank you for calling. Master Yoda is busy right now. Please call back later. Thank you, and goodbye--"

" Mr. Hot Voice!" came the higher-pitched, almost-soprano Southern voice. Then there was more maniacal laughter and the operator(s) hung up their phone. Matt did the same, looking muddled. Tai spoke.

"Who did you talk to?" He questioned Matt.

"A very weird operator," Matt replied, shaking his head.

~ 4 years later~

"Look what I brought!" Sapphire exclaimed. She produced a phone from out of her bag.

"It's... another phone," Eclipse stated the obvious.

"That's a phone?" Exotica Kayru said. She was a Jedi, Eclipse's long-lost cousin, and not at all familiar with Earth's devices.

"Yeah." Sapphire giggled cheerily, her voice light and tinted with Southern US accent. "Let's play an evil prank now!" *** Matt began to dial the phone. It didn't occur to him this was the same phone he had used oh so many years back.

"Hello?" He asked. This time, there was no hesitation or giggling.

"Hello. You have reached the Jedi Temple. For Master Yoda press-"

"Sapphire, is that you?"(2) He asked uncertainly.

"Oh crap!" the feminine voice said, "he recognized me. Hang up!" The line went dead.

"What was that about?" Davis asked.

"Shut up Davis," Matt said irritably, hanging up the phone. "You have small hair."

~*FINIS*~

NB: Yes, it was weird, I know. It's a Mary-Sue, and I wrote it three years ago, when I was only an ASPIRING fan-fiction author... not a pro (lol, j/k) like I am now. It's weird to see how far you come along in the game. I revised this, to make it more comprehensible, but it's not to say it couldn't do with more revision. Well... um... the footnotes!

(1): The oven mitts. A separate story all to itself. Hopefully it will be posted in the near future. Goes back to "Once Upon A Mattress". If you've seen it, and seen what Sir Harry does with his hair, you'll get the whole running the hand through the hair thing. The oven mitts, is just something he says to go along with it... sort of a catch phrase. I'll try to post the story, because it's quite comical... and I could even write it WITHOUT Mary- Sues! *is shocked*

(2): The phone call takes place in the first arc of 01 (Devimon Arc), Sapphire becomes a Digimon Mary-Sue in the second arc of 01 (Myotismon Arc), and joins the group like all the other Mary-Sues. I have a whole different enemy with these cool Lunamon things and stuff, but I'm not sure if I'm gonna go along with it. *shrugs* We'll wait and see what happens, eh?

Well, I hope you liked it! No flames, please, because usually they're redundant and voice things I already KNOW about my work. Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated, of course! (Yes, there IS a difference, Voice!)