A Shelter for Broken Hearts: Slowly, Sweetly Redux
Summary: Sometimes the brokenhearted take comfort in each other—and love has a way of blossoming from friendship.
Disclaimer: I don't own the CCS characters but this plot is mine.
Kindly see the notes after the end. Thanks!
Chapter 1: Rough Beginnings
Good friends always remember how they met, and if you asked Syaoran Li how he'd met Sakura Kinomoto, he would feign ignorance, glare, and end the conversation. If pressed, he would claim he'd forgotten how he'd met her.
But in truth he did remember how they'd met two years ago, through their respective best friends. Sakura's best friend Tomoyo, a fashion designer, had gotten her an exclusive interview with Japan's hottest balladeer, Eriol Hiiragizawa, who was her client. Sakura had wound up working for an entertainment magazine after college, to her own surprise, and she liked doing interviews for them.
Eriol had thoroughly enjoyed Sakura's off-the-beaten-path questions like, "Do you believe that music creates reality?" He was flattered to learn that she had done a crash course on him to know what he did and the statements he made most often, thus preventing her from asking questions he was tired of answering.
It was when she asked, "There's this study that shows that music—along with scent—triggers and makes memory. Do you choose your songs on that basis? You're known for songs that touch the heart...and you seem to wear your heart on your sleeve. Yet is it you? You seem so...different...in person. More calm, more composed, more…more like someone who's shy and sensitive. No offense meant, Hiiragizawa-san."
"None taken, Sakura-san, and do call me Eriol. Allow me to explain. The discrepancy is because someone helps me write my songs," Eriol admitted with a smile.
"But you take them and make them your own," Sakura said admiringly.
"Still...I believe that he deserves credit for his achievements. Allow me to introduce him to you." Eriol bowed and moved to the music room of his studio.
"Him" was his long-time collaborator and best friend, composer Syaoran Li. Eriol thought Sakura could get a good story out of the interview, and dragged a reluctant Syaoran into the room.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Syaoran, in the process of demolishing a complimentary tray of sushi Eriol had received, hissed when Eriol yanked him away from the food.
"There's someone I'd like you to meet," Eriol said. "The girl interviewing me."
"Why do I have to talk to some bimbo?" Syaoran didn't bother lowering his voice; he hoped the girl in the next room would hear, be offended, and leave.
"She's not a bimbo, Syaoran," Eriol smiled. "And I think you'll get along." Using his taller, more muscular body, Eriol managed to fling Syaoran into the next room and onto a couch across Sakura.
"This is my best friend and collaborator Syaoran Li. Syaoran, this is Sakura Kinomoto," Eriol began.
Syaoran nodded slightly in her direction and raised an eyebrow rudely at Sakura, who smiled at him.
"Hi! So you write Eriol Hiiragizawa's songs?" The question was not unexpected, and Syaoran sighed in frustration at the perky girl before him. She smiled; he rolled his eyes.
How do I discourage this Barbie girl? Syaoran wondered. He decided to start by rudely looking her over. She was pretty; girls like her always are, he mused. Big green eyes, a ready smile, cheeks flushed with good health, a good figure. Boring, he thought. She smiled at him in a friendly way, and his defenses automatically went up. Syaoran told himself didn't much care for her; he was tired of pretty girls flinging themselves at him since he'd suffered that particular burden since middle school. Perky, pretty girls like Sakura simply annoyed him; he found them shallow and uninteresting.
"Yeah." Syaoran did not expound. Instead he crossed his arms and looked at her coldly. His hostile demeanor often ended conversations quickly, and he'd learned to wield it to keep people away from him.
Since high school, he'd been annoyed by women who tried to go after him; he always suspected they were after the money of the Lis, no matter how many times his best friend Eriol pointed out that perhaps his devastating good looks had something to do with it.
It didn't help that Syaoran was nursing a broken heart from a painful divorce, and he was still angry about the loss, hurt beyond belief. And so he poured his hostility into his glare, crossing his arms and sinking into the couch.
Sakura was unfazed though; years of dealing with her older brother Touya had taught her to see through demeanors like Syaoran's, and she could see a shy, hurt young man behind it. A rather handsome shy young man, she thought, and she suppressed the urge to giggle. His tousled chocolate-brown hair and amber eyes were striking, and he had an arrogant air to him that made him even more attractive.
"I was telling Eriol-kun how I admired his songs and he said I ought to talk to you. I mentioned some songs, and he said they were your compositions completely. I think those songs touch the heart...you know heartbreak so well."
His face didn't change, although one corner of his mouth lifted slightly. Syaoran was sick of being psychoanalyzed. Fuck off, he thought at Sakura rudely.
Yet she plunged on. "You wear your heart on a sleeve in these compositions. Eriol-san says he rarely changes anything from your original demo CDs. Is it easier for you to express your pain through music? I mean, heartbreak is a constant...everyone goes through it...but with you, it's a deep, painful longing...like you're searching for your heart again. And I think it's been a least a year or so since your heart was broken because it feels like you've had time to brood over the pain. Was it...if I may be so bold...was it a divorce you didn't want?"
Syaoran's dark brown eyes widened as he stared at Sakura. Her green eyes were sympathetic, not mocking. She was sincere. How had she known? How had she reached into his emotions and known about his ex-wife Loraina, whose private name with him was Alia? The beautiful violet-eyed blonde had swept into his life, given him a taste of love...then left, divorcing him after a year.
Yet Sakura had somehow seen the story through his songs. He would later learn that Sakura had become more empathic, more insightful over the years—plenty of heartbreak and the influence of Tomoyo made it inevitable.
Correctly interpreting his silence, she said, "I understand lonely people," she said gently. "Because...I'm that way too. I just wish I could express my heart as well as you, in a way that helps people like me let out what's in our hearts. So when I see that in others, it's a talent I admire."
She smiled, though Syaoran noticed the smile didn't reach her eyes—something he would notice a lot in her, and which everyone else save for Tomoyo overlooked.
"Anyway, what I meant to say is that I understand you because of your songs. You express the feelings so well, and I sort of 'read' your story through them. Especially that part in 'Let the Pain Remain', the one that goes 'So let the pain remain forever in my heart, for every throb it brings is one more moment spent with you. I'll let the pain bring on the rain if that's the only way, if there's no other way to be with you again.' (1) You know," and Sakura smiled but looked away, "it was like you were saying what I felt. I cried when I first heard that song. Because it's so true. Even painful memories are better compared to nothing sometimes."
Syaoran's body language had changed completely, Sakura noticed. He held himself more loosely now; his eyes were wider, and his aura of hostility was gone. So she went on with another comment. Neither of them noticed that Tomoyo had joined Eriol and was watching them in the doorway.
"I remember the first time I heard 'Mary Says.' I…" and Sakura's voice hitched, "I can never forget the part that goes, 'Goodbye yesterday, I see my dreams walking away. And Mary looks just like she did before, 'cept she don't love me anymore. So what happens next? Do I listen to my mind or heart? I don't know where to start feeling all right again.' (2) I wonder if I can presume to say this to you but… I believe things become all right if you set yourself to it. It's not something you have to believe in but if someone else believes it for you then maybe…maybe you will be." And she smiled the kind of smile Syaoran saw so rarely these days: kind, sweet, and understanding.
Syaoran took a long time to speak, merely staring at Sakura. She patiently waited for him, neither smiling nor frowning—just being there.
Who was this woman? Syaoran frowned, and looked away, ashamed at having been seen through so easily by a woman he thought was just a smiling idiot. He knew he should drive her away; everything in his experience was screaming at him to push her away.
But sometimes the heart teaches the head lessons it needs to learn. Syaoran would never regret the next words he said.
"What did you say your name was again?"
"You ran into Sakura-san at the grocery?" Eriol's eyebrows quirked in amusement.
"Yeah," Syaoran threw himself on the couch of Eriol's studio. "Damnedest thing. I was out to get some butter and there she was looking at the milk. Seems she had an interview in the area and decided to go there on an impulse."
Eriol waited; Syaoran wouldn't have mentioned it if there was nothing else to it.
"Well, er…I slipped. I was trying to sneak past her—didn't want to say hello, really, and she had her back to me anyway but I didn't see the water on the floor leaking from the refrigerator case. I knocked Kinomoto down and got her wet. Her shirt was white, so I had to buy her a new one."
Shoulders quaking, Eriol laughed. "Good Lord, Syaoran, you aren't normally like that."
"I know!" Syaoran threw his hands up. "And there's more!"
"Really now," Eriol grinned.
"Yesterday I was at the gym, and on the way out—you know I prefer to shower at home—on the way out my cell phone rang. I was digging through my pockets when it slipped out of my hand."
"See what happens when your hands are sweaty?" Eriol chortled.
"Oh shut it. Anyway she turned the corner and it hit her. On the head. Thing is, she managed to catch it before she went down."
Eriol blinked. "Syaoran, normally when a man likes a woman he asks her out. He doesn't assault her twice in a row."
"Oh come on," Syaoran rounded on Eriol, who was giggling like a girl. "It's not like I did it on purpose! And I don't like her that way. Puh-lease."
Ah but you like her enough to mention her, Eriol smiled. "Bet she thinks you're stalking her," he teased.
"Am not!" Syaoran said indignantly. "It just happened…"
"Kaho used to say that there is no such thing as coincidence, only hitsuzen. Kind of like destiny."
"Eriol, if you're implying what I think you are, get ready to eat my shorts," Syaoran threatened.
Eriol held up his hands. "Okay, I shall desist. But, the least you can do is apologize to Sakura-san."
"I did," Syaoran sighed.
"Without the word 'sorry' entering the conversation at any point," Eriol chuckled.
Syaoran glared. "I told her I'd blow her to a good meal and she forgave me. Just like that," and he snapped his fingers.
"When?" Eriol forebore to point out that this would be Syaoran's first time out with a woman in over a year.
"Tomorrow. I'm taking her to dinner and praying I can stuff her with good food and she won't sue me."
"Good luck then. Make sure it's a good place. Are you not going to ask me to recommend a place?" Eriol's eyes twinkled.
"No thanks," Syaoran rolled his eyes. "Knowing you, any place you recommend will charge ten thousand yen for a glass of water."
"O ye of little faith," Eriol began.
"So…here's the melody I worked out for that drivel you wrote the other day," Syaoran talked loudly over Eriol as he opened the grand piano. "Now listen!" He began to play, though he was pressing the keys with unusual vehemence.
Eriol smiled to himself. Tomoyo indeed had the best instincts when it came to matching people up. He quickly typed out a text message on his phone and sent it to her. This would be very interesting to discuss, indeed.
He would end up discussing it with two people, in the end, one of whom would find the situation very, very interesting indeed.
0-0-0
"Er, Li-kun? Where are we going?" Sakura asked hesitantly.
"A Korean restaurant. It's got a Michelin star. It's here in Ikebukuro," Syaoran said. "Just a minute away."
Sakura didn't protest. She vaguely knew of a Korean restaurant with a Michelin star—but it was in Ginza. Given the determined and somewhat irritated look on Syaoran's face, though, she decided not to say anything.
Soon she realized they'd been walking for ten minutes.
"Ne, Li-kun, just how long is your concept of a minute?" Sakura teased.
"I said we'll be there soon!" Syaoran said, almost blushing from embarrassment.
"I do believe you're lost," Sakura said after a few more blocks of aimless walking.
"I am not!" Syaoran retorted. "I'm just…disorientated."
"Is there even such a word?"
Syaoran turned and rolled his eyes when he noticed she was grinning. "Hey, this is my apology so shut up."
"Ooh, so gentlemanly," Sakura teased.
Syaoran groaned and refused to answer; by this time he was ready to enter just about any restaurant that looked even vaguely Korean. Sakura was still making jokes about his need for a GPS, but she was also slowing down and getting quieter—and Syaoran realized it meant she was getting tired. And it was his fault.
He felt guilty; here he was, intending to apologize for the past two incidents, and he was being rude to her. Worse, this probably would count as a third incident…he could just imagine her telling Daidouji about this: He dragged me around Ikebukuro and he starved me and he got us lost! Syaoran shuddered. His pride would never let him admit he was lost, though, and when he saw the quaint little café with the bright colors he associated with Korea, he grabbed Sakura's hand and pulled her in, heartily exclaiming, "Here we are!"
Disbelieving, she stared at the sign. "This doesn't look Korean to me…" she began. "For one thing, the sign is in English."
Loftily he said, "It is. The owner is Korean, and Koreans love cute stuff. And they're good with English." He prayed she knew nothing about Korea.
She stared at him, unable to believe his cheek or his pride, whichever was worse. He knew she knew he was bluffing, but he refused to cave in. Luckily she didn't take him to task for it; instead she giggled and pointed towards a tall, slender blond man with an apron reading "Kiss the Owner, Please!" who was welcoming guests.
"And I assume Koreans have genetic predispositions towards blond hair and blue eyes?"
"Of course," Syaoran baldly lied. "The war, you know."
Sakura snorted but said nothing, much to Syaoran's relief.
When the owner introduced himself later as "Fay D. Flourite" as he took their orders, Sakura let loose a tiny giggle and kicked Syaoran under the table.
It didn't hurt, but Syaoran gasped indignantly. The last time anyone had treated him that way, with such familiarity…was so long ago. His cousin Meiling loved annoying him; though she was much, much more abrasive than Sakura, the gesture still warmed him a little. She took things easily—in perfect counterpoint to his hidden tendency to get overemotional at times.
"Last time I checked, 'Fay D. Flourite' wasn't a Korean name," she ragged him, chortling with laughter. "Come on. Admit you were wrong."
Refusing to compromise his dignity, Syaoran pretended he was going to the bathroom but turned and dodged into the kitchen, to the bemusement of the staff. Upon passing the tall blond and blue-eyed owner, he turned to the cheerful-looking man.
"May I please speak with you, sir?" he asked urgently.
"Certainly, if you call me Fay," the owner said with a wide smile.
"Er, yes. Fay-san." Syaoran cleared his throat nervously. "I have a favor to ask. Please, pretend you're Korean, sir. Or that you know the language. Or something."
The older man's eyes sparkled with mischief. "Why certainly. The customer gets what the customer wants. But may I ask why?"
Left with no other option, Syaoran confessed, and Fay had the grace not to laugh. Instead, he returned the money to and smiled. "Your girlfriend is very lovely, and for you to go such lengths to try and please her is a lovely gesture."
Syaoran flushed. "She's not my girlfriend!"
The owner looked into Syaoran's eyes, and seemed to find something there. He smiled again. "My mistake. My apologies, sir."
Syaoran returned
When he served their vegetable and seafood soup, he suddenly greeted them with "Annyeonghaseyo! Jal meokkesseumnida."
Sakura's jaw dropped. "Was that…Korean?"
The owner laughed and bowed. "Why yes. I said 'hello' and 'bon appetit'. You could say I serve fusion Korean here. Try the beef stew."
"But…you're not Korean?"
"No, but I studied there for a while," and Flourite winked at Syaoran as he left to get their pasta.
As soon as he left, Sakura turned to Syaoran. "Hoe! So this is technically a Korean place?"
"Told you so," Syaoran smirked.
"Oh…Um, I'm sorry I doubted you."
He nodded smugly.
When the beef stew arrived, Sakura tasted it; a big smile spread across her face. "Oh, this is just wonderful."
The other dishes arrived, and Sakura ate her fill of the wonderful chicken and orange salad, pasta with fatty tuna in a delectable cream sauce, a pork and potato casserole, and a melt-in-your-mouth meringue.
"Wow. Just wow. Thank you, Li-kun. This was amazing!" Sakura said.
"As to be expected. I have good taste, even when others doubt me," Syaoran kept a straight face as he said this.
She looked so remorseful that Syaoran broke down and confessed his deception, feeling uneasy. Sakura hit his arm, and in retaliation, he pretended to smear froth from his coffee on her nose. When she squeaked and backed away from him, he finally let loose with hearty laughter.
She stared at him.
"You can laugh!"
"Of course I can," he said, returning to his usual gruff state.
"But you don't, normally," she said, sounding awed. "And you look good when you laugh."
"Oh shut up." But inwardly, he smiled at the compliment. He pulled a cigarette out of his breast pocket, intending to light up; it was a habit he'd picked up in the long lonely nights without his ex-wife.
"Er," Sakura frowned.
"Oh, I forgot to ask permission," Syaoran said. "I take it that's a no?"
"Please," Sakura requested, "don't. It's bad for you."
"I already have a mother," Syaoran complained as he shoved the cigarette back into his breast pocket.
"Still…" Sakura tried to look forbidding but wound up looking like a cute child trying to be stern.
Amused, Syaoran decided not to call her on it. "Fine. The nasty cigarette is gone."
"Permanently, I hope," Sakura said.
"What, you gonna stop me?"
Chin set firmly, Sakura nodded.
Syaoran chuckled, shaking his head. Then he asked for the bill. Sakura tried to pay 'her share' but Syaoran defeated her by shoving his card at the waitress who brought the bill.
"I said it was my treat, since I, uh, hurt you the last two times we met," he insisted.
"But next time is mine. Promise?" Sakura held out her pinky finger.
Next time? So I'm not such bad company after all, Syaoran the first time in what felt like forever, he smiled. "Only kids do that."
"It's much better when you smile," Sakura smiled at him.
Embarrassed, Syaoran wiped the smile off his face and grunted.
"So should I call you Grandpa?" Sakura impishly asked.
Snorting, he linked pinkies with her, and they shook on it.
The owner Fay bowed them out, and as Syaoran passed him, he whispered, "You ought not to let such a beautiful woman go." He pressed a business card into Syaoran's hand, and added, "Come back soon. I love watching love stories develop."
Pretending not to hear him, Syaoran bundled Sakura into a taxi and took her home to Tomoeda; he hadn't brought his car because he'd thought the place was nearby. She was about to ask him in for coffee when she realized her brother was home.
"Erm, raincheck?" she suggested. "My brother's kinda rude to my male visitors."
"Sure," Syaoran shrugged. "See you around. I'll call you about next week."
"My turn to pay!" Sakura reminded him, and he mock-sighed in exasperation.
"Fine, whatever, see you."
"And no cigarettes!" Sakura called.
"You wish," Syaoran muttered, rolling his eyes. But they kept the date, and soon began spending more time together.
And just like that, to Eriol and Tomoyo's surprise, Sakura and Syaoran became good friends.
It soon became a weekly habit for Syaoran and Sakura to eat at the Cat's Eye Café, then on weekends, they would hang out at the other's place, sometimes doing chores for each other, sometimes just hanging out.
But the beginning of their friendship was quite rough, no thanks to his distrusting nature and her tendency to retreat when hurt beyond her tolerance. Sometimes he would lash out, and Sakura would not contact him for some time. Syaoran did not know then why he kept seeking her out, offering wordless apologies by gruffly buying her small gifts or treats, and making an effort to be nicer around Sakura. Little by little he was changing, and Sakura gently praised him on that.
Later, Syaoran would understood that, like a stray cat that can sense where kindness and good food can be found, he had been attracted to Sakura's warmth and sweetness.
Some time into their friendship, Sakura was late arriving at the Cat's Eye café. Syaoran, annoyed, rang her phone several times, but there was no answer. He'd gotten up to leave when he saw her drifting towards him, looking dazed.
"Where the hell have you been? Do you realize how long I've been waiting?" Syaoran seethed.
She looked nervously over her shoulder. "Sorry, Syaoran-kun." She peered into the café and said, "Let's stay inside."
Syaoran groaned. He would definitely not be able to smoke indoors. But when he saw that she was shaking, he mistook it for fear.
"What are you afraid of?" he asked as they sat down.
That was when he noticed she was clenching her fists, and biting down hard on her lip. It was anger.
"Nothing," she tried to lie.
"Bullshit. This," and he drew out a cigarette, lighting it up brazenly where it was forbidden, "is nothing." He stabbed out the cigarette suddenly, making Sakura almost jump. "You are angry. Tell me why. After all I'm the one who had to sit here like a dateless turd for thirty minutes!"
Despite herself, Sakura smiled. "Dateless turd. Thanks for insulting yourself in advance," she grinned.
Syaoran's hand shot out and he grabbed hers. "You're shaking. Stop changing the topic, for fuck's sake."
The vulgarity surprised Sakura. She took several deep breaths, then looked at his hand. "You can let go now. I'll tell you."
He slowly let go of her hand, and the story unfolded. She'd almost run into her college boyfriend.
"So, what about him?" Syaoran asked impatiently.
"it's a long story," Sakura hesitated.
He raised an eyebrow and waited. After some more hesitation, Sakura slowly told him the story.
College was a relief to Sakura after a bad high school experience, and she joyfully enrolled in the preschool teaching course that she wanted in the number one university in Japan. With Tomoyo as her roommate, she rented an apartment near Tokyo University.
It was like being free. People had no preconceived notions of who she was there, and best of all, no one knew what had happened to her in high school. Sakura happily signed up for organizations, extracurricular activities, and got herself into a whirlwind of social activity which Tomoyo encouraged.
It was through one of the clubs she joined that she met Emile. He was just a few inches taller, slightly chubby, but very cute. His shy smile attracted her, and when he asked her out, Sakura was thrilled. He was romantic and kind, and he paid attention to her—very unlike her terrible high school boyfriend Kito, whom Sakura tried not to think about.
Tomoyo encouraged the budding friendship, and six months later, Emile quietly proposed to Sakura that they go steady. And Sakura, determined not to repeat her mistakes in high school, tried to get to know Emile as well as she could, spending time with him, making him good meals, being sweet.
He found it funny. "And why do you want to know my favorite flower?" he asked as they snuggled on a large couple's swing.
"I just want to know all I can about you," Sakura kissed the tip of his nose, then wiggled her toes in happiness.
"Mmm. Orchids," Emile said, his dark brown eyes alight with humor. "Your favorite? You can't be the only one asking these questions."
"Nadeshiko blossoms! Favorite color?"
Emile laughed, running a hand through his short black hair. "I feel silly. Blue? Yours, I know, is pink."
"Okay," Sakura nodded, then giggled as Emile kissed her.
"Do you have a list or something?" Emile asked curiously.
"No. But I take everything you say down in my mind."
"That's sweet," Emile grinned, and kissed her hand. "That's why I love you."
Sakura beamed at him, and thanked the gods for bringing him into her life.
He liked to surprise her; once, he'd pounced on her after class, covering her eyes and asking, "Guess who?"
"Emile!" Sakura flung her arms around his neck. The gentle-looking boy kissed her back, his dark eyes alight with laughter.
Sakura had made a happy return to love thanks to Emile. He was kind and sweet, and he didn't pressure her to get into bed with him at the first opportunity. He was taking engineering, and intended to become a city councilor.
It was a cozy, sweet relationship, as far as everyone knew—even Sakura. They moved from kissing to gentle making-out, and Sakura was grateful he never pushed her for more. Their relationship seemed like a textbook romance, and something nagged at her as a result.
"I don't get it," Sakura said as she lolled in Tomoyo's room in their apartment. "We're happy. Why am I worried?"
Tomoyo was distracted, but working hard to cover it up; she had sneaked out for a tryst with Touya (who had himself run out on Yukito) that afternoon, and she didn't want Sakura to know. "Hmm...Maybe it's because you're not used to quiet relationships, Sakura-chan? No offense meant."
Sakura paused, chewing on a chocolate Pocky stick as she thought. "Well, yeah, maybe," she mused. "Oh, I'm being silly!"
Tomoyo would blame herself when the relationship blew up; she had been sneaking out of the apartment to meet with Touya, whom she loved. They would make passionate love, him skipping work, her cutting class. It was as though they knew their time together would not last...and given that he was cheating on someone else, it was doomed.
Preoccupied this, Tomoyo had not noticed the warning signs: Emile making excuses to Sakura for not seeing her, Emile breaking dates at the last second, Emile being busy with study groups.
And so when Sakura received the video in her email, it had shattered her.
Tomoyo knew Emile was popular because of his leadership at a prestigious school fraternity, and he was sought after by the girls of the corresponding sorority. Sakura had turned down the sorority's invitation for her to join them, and unknowingly had set herself up for retribution from the rich, snobbish girls.
"Hey, I have a video in my email," Sakura called to Tomoyo, who had just arrived, freshly bathed to hide the evidence of an afternoon her forbidden lover had spent making love to her. "How do I open the file?"
Tomoyo froze, terrified that Sakura would know what she had been up to that afternoon. She soon realized that Sakura was too engrossed in preparing her Christmas present to Emile. So she came over, and saw that the subject line was 'Surprise from Emile!' "Surprise from Emile? But the email address isn't his," she said, feeling a bit wary of the video.
"Will DivX run this?" Sakura asked curiously.
"Try it," Tomoyo said.
Sakura clicked on 'download' and when the player ran, she was horrified to see a drunken Emile at a fraternity party pawing the leader of the sorority. He even pulled down the girl's shirt and bra to expose her breasts, and laughed raucously.
"Aw, won't your sweet and cute girlfriend mind?" the sorority leader, whose name was Akane, asked as she ground her hips on his lap.
"That virgin?" Emile snorted; it was an ugly side of him neither Sakura nor Tomoyo had even suspected was there. "Nah. She expects white lace and wedding bells. I wanna get laid tonight. I wanna fuuuccckkk." He made a lewd gesture with his hips and everyone roared with laughter.
"Wanna do me?" Akane asked, leering at the camera. "I promise I won't be sweet and virginal." She raised her skirt and showed him her underwear—a tiny thong that left little to the imagination.
For an answer, Emile groped her. Akane laughed and ground her hips into his hand. The camera followed as they vanished through a doorway in the fraternity house.
Then an off-camera girl's voice sneered, "Hey Kinomoto! This is what happens when you don't put out, and when you think you're too good for the rest of us!" High-pitched laughter from several women followed, and then the camera entered the bedroom.
Tomoyo turned away; Sakura watched in horror as it showed Emile having sex with Akane. Every now and then he would make a crude comment, like "Your boobs are bigger than hers! Lemme have a handful!" And she knew he meant her.
The video ended after a while, but Sakura had been unable to tear her eyes away from it.
"Oh my God...I am so sorry..." was all Tomoyo could say. Sakura had numbly walked away, and was beginning to pack things in a bag.
"Sakura?"
"I have...to return his presents," was the soft, frozen reply. "Only," Sakura spoke through her tears, which Tomoyo could see Sakura did not even feel, "I can't do it myself. Could you...please...give them back for me?" She tossed in the stuffed toys, the dried flowers, the love notes mechanically. Then she began, suddenly, to laugh. "He's wrong about one thing. I'm not a virgin," Sakura said.
No. No, no, no...Tomoyo's hands flew to Sakura's mouth. "Don't, Sakura! Don't hurt yourself by bringing that up."
"Maybe I should've slept with him after all," Sakura continued to laugh hollowly. "Seems that's what he wanted." Then she began to sob in earnest. She had trusted Emile, thought he was the one to heal her wounds from Kito...yet he'd wound up inflicting more on her.
"Oh Sakura," Tomoyo said as she held her best friend in her arms. She stroked Sakura's short auburn hair gently as Sakura cried, just as stunned. The video had clearly been taken on purpose, and Emile, drunk as he was, clearly did not love Sakura if he could sneer about her in that way.
Syaoran was silent. Then, "What a complete and utter loser of an asshole, and I insult assholes when I say that."
"Well, I sort of agree," Sakura tried to smile. "So…do you forgive me for being late?"
"Are you kidding?" Syaoran huffed. "Gimme his address so I can kick his nuts in for you."
Sakura almost smiled. "Someone already did."
"Really? Who? Tell me, so I can congratulate him," Syaoran asked eagerly.
"Her, actually."
"Who?"
This time, Sakura smiled. "My best friend. Tomoyo-chan."
"Daidouji?" Syaoran asked incredulously. "No way. Tell me that part."
"Well," and Sakura looked thoughtful, "when it happened, Tomoyo-chan saw that I kind of took it badly. And she didn't like that, so…I dunno exactly what happened, but he was expelled from school—and he didn't have a career. Last I heard he left the country—although I guess he's back now."
Leaning back, Syaoran whistled. "Remind me to ask her about it."
And he did. Tomoyo smiled, and serenely told him the story, with a few details corroborated by Eriol, to Syaoran's surprise.
Why did this have to happen? Tomoyo raged. She knew Sakura was heartsore because she'd constantly been rejected—through no fault of her own. Yukito Tsukishiro, her brother's boyfriend, had been her crush; she'd taken the news of his relationship with Touya cheerfully. She'd liked a boy in middle school, and told him of her feelings; luckily Haru was a kind boy, and told her that he liked her but not that way—because he wanted to court Tomoyo. Tomoyo had turned him down in order not to break Sakura's heart even more.
When Tomoyo returned Emile's gifts to Sakura the next day, he at least had the grace to look ashamed. "Tomoyo-san..."
"It's Daidouji to you," Tomoyo cut him off coldly, dropping the bags at his feet so she wouldn't have to touch him.
"...er..." Emile scratched his head. "Can you help me? I know I, uh, pulled a boo-boo there," and he laughed, "but...You see, I still like Sakura and I think she'd make a good trophy wife for my political career, so maybe I could...can you help me win her back?" He smiled at her in what he thought was a winning manner.
Tomoyo drew herself to her full height. "No." She wanted to add, 'you stupid whorish scumbag, you disgusting cretin,' but she did not want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he'd gotten to her too. She made a hand signal, and her bodyguards stepped forward.
"Try to approach me or Sakura-chan again, and..." Tomoyo began to laugh her oh-ho-ho-ho laugh, but in a cold manner, "maybe you'd like someone else in my family to deal with you?"
Emile went pale; the rumor on campus was that Tomoyo's father was the ruthless Yakuza leader Kirigo Daidouji, who had been known to slowly cut pieces off his enemies while keeping them alive.
"No...S...Sorry!" He'd fled, leaving the gifts behind.
Tomoyo snorted, and left the presents in a nearby donation box for a local shelter. Coward. She wasn't related to the Yakuza leader and she'd never said anything, but people believed what they wanted to...and who was she not to use the advantage? Her father was dead, but no one had ever asked her about it. She'd meant her mother—if Sonomi Daidouji ever found out what Emile had done to Sakura, he would find himself missing vital parts of his anatomy while still being alive.
She'd dealt with Akane the same way, and since Akane was on a scholarship funded by the Amamiya Industries, which were owned by Sonomi Daidouji, it was a simple thing to let the girl know who owned Amamiya Industries. Tomoyo had demanded that the entire sorority leave Sakura alone, or Akane would find herself serving burgers or doing porn for a living. Terrified, Akane acceded; there was no way she could pay for her college tuition on her own.
She waited for the chance to ruin Emile for good, using her trusty camera as a weapon. A week before elections for the student president of their university, where he was a front-runner, she posted videos of him having sex with other girls in the sorority, planning to spend student council money, and mocking his admirers as 'lapdogs'--all on the college website, with the help of a hacker friend who hated Emile. It had been taken down, but the damage was done: Emile lost his credibility, lost the elections, and was nearly expelled for drinking on campus. He had no idea who had done it to him, and Tomoyo preferred it that way.
But the satisfaction of taking vengeance for Sakura soon became something hollow when she noticed that from then on, Sakura always had the ghost of tears in her eyes no matter how widely she smiled.
"She does that," Syaoran said thoughtfully. "When she thinks you're not looking, her eyes tell the truth; she still nurses some other demons in her heart."
He missed the glance Eriol and Tomoyo gave each other. "Of course. But she will tell you herself, in due time, Li-kun," Tomoyo said gently.
"Remind me to be nicer to her," Syaoran said to Eriol.
"You can start by telling her your own story," Eriol said quietly.
"I can't…" Syaoran protested, but only by force of habit. Thinking on it later, though, he decided that he would.
He turned to Tomoyo. "What happened to Sakura…I couldn't handle that if it happened to me."
Oh, but Sakura has handled much worse, Tomoyo thought. That particular secret was Sakura's alone to reveal, though.
Little did they know that she was in for more misery in the months to come. Because at that moment, everything seemed quite fine.
(To be continued next weekend)
This is a reworking of my "Slowly, Sweetly" story to put events in chronological order and fix a few errors and vague parts. I hope this is less confusing.
The Eriol/Tomoyo story has mostly been taken out so I can focus on SxS. I hope you like it. Unfortunately "The Heart Has Seasons" is on hiatus because my co-author is currently busy with other projects and we've got an awful time trying to get in touch.
To readers of the original "Slowly, Sweetly": I promise that story will end…in fact the next three chapters have been written out but until I can revise them until they read well, this will be what I offer instead. This will be updated every week or so because it's a rewrite, but every chapter will contain new material. It's my little gift to you guys for being so kind. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. (SMILE) Do leave me a review to let me know how I'm doing?
In Chapter 2, up next weekend: It's Syaoran's turn to talk about his past as he and Sakura get closer. Too bad this is when Yue walks into her life.
Notes:
Sakura is technically a reporter here. CCS suggests she might become a teacher or athlete, but she has the perkiness required of reporters for her beat.
Why is Syaoran the composer and not the performer? Syaoran does not like performing in the series but he seems to have an artistic bent of sorts, so why not let Eriol be frontman?
(1) Lyrics from "Let the Pain Remain" by Basil Valdez.
(2) Lyrics from "Mary Says" by Leehom Wang.
Hitsuzen is sort of like fate or the inevitable. This concept permeates Clamp works, and in CCS Kaho Mizuki and Touya Kinomoto say in the first episode of the Last Judgment (season 2), "There is no such thing as coincidence, only hitsuzen."
A Michelin star is a very rare and coveted gourmet accreditation for a restaurant.
Fay D. Flourite is a character from Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles. Someday I will write my own CCS-Tsubasa crossover (hehe). He will play a bigger role in this revision. In the TRC manga he ran a cafe, and his cheerfulness is a great foil for Syaoran's grumpiness. (In TRC's early stages the Syaoran there is cheerful and innocent, very unlike our dear CCS Syaoran, haha)
Annyeonghaseyo! Jal meokkesseumnida - Korean for hello and bon appetit, as closely as I can approximate it; if I'm wrong and you're Korean, feel free to correct me!
Syaoran smoking- It's mentioned in the original, and I decided to keep it, to show how Sakura breaks him of the habit and how the process helps them become closer; he kicks the habit for her.
Syaoran calling Sakura "You"- In the series he doesn't call her name until the cute elevator episode. In the manga it comes right before the last Judgment. In both instances he was falling for her already, so I'll follow that here.
Syaoran is perfect, right? Let's knock him off his pedestal for a bit, taking his character to one possible extreme. Note how aggressive Syaoran is with Loraina, and how, sadly, he does not realize how his possessiveness with her backfires in the end. He has to learn a lot before he ends up with Sakura, the true love of his life.
Remember how Meiling gave Syaoran the loophole in the series when she said she would be his bride? I thought it would be interesting to use it on Syaoran.
Sakura and Syaoran's characters change slightly in this rewrite. I wanted to bring them closer to their CCS selves, plus the advice from Julia and Tania, mystic emeralds, Diney Blue and Janec Shannon recently has helped me so much in refiguring this story.