Summary: Set after You're Welcome. Cordy reflects about lost chances and lost love.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in here. It all belongs to the creators of Angel and stuff. So please don't sue me!
It broke my heart to leave him like that. At least I got to say goodbye, which is more than a lot of people got. What does it matter though, he'll never know that I had been in love with him since I met him back in Sunnydale all those years ago.
I loved all of it, the mysterious, broody personality, the super strength, the way he would risk his life or whatever it was for people he had never met, and even the weird vampire face. When I was around him, he made me feel the way the girls in the movies always act, lightheaded and dreamy.
What he did wasn't about the Shanshu anymore, as it hadn't been for a long time. He liked saving people, and I liked helping him. He was the one person I could talk to, tell all my deepest, darkest secrets, and reveal all my fears to. He was my best friend, and so much more.
It doesn't matter anymore, really. Even though he thought he loved me, he won't sulk for ages over my death. Angel will move on, and in time, he won't even remember my name. All I will be to him is the vain ex-cheerleader that sorted papers for him once upon a time.
He will fall in love again, find that perfect girl. Someone who's prettier, funnier, smarter, and stronger than me.
Even though I can't be with him anymore, I will do everything I can to get him that permanent soul, even if it meant that I would have to give up mine. I'll always be here, watching over him, doing my own little part to help the helpless. And he'll never know, I'll never get the chance just to say one little thing. "I love you."
Ash: I love reviews!
Anne: Review and you'll get lotsa cookies.
Ash: I want cookies!
Anne: No, these cookies are for reviewers.
Fight for cookies
Ash: YAY! I got the cookies. Anyway, review and thanks 4 readin this fic!