Hey all you little Psychos (and big ones, depending on your height) This is my first Psych fanfic but I hope everyone will enjoy it!
Shawn sat in the Psych office looking around it; taking in every line, paint chip, and stain. He was wearing a suit and tie and for one bizarre chance his hair had been combed back neatly matching the office look. Though his situation was far more bizarre then merely hair. Shawn was quitting, shutting down the Psych business. He was getting an office job, renting a plain apartment, cutting out a different career for himself. And it was all for them. Gus, Juliet, his dad. This is what they had all wanted, just a regular old Shawn.
Nothing could convince him otherwise as his eidetic memory brought to his mind every biting argument, every frustrated reprimand and every exasperated look of disappointment. He bit his lip, nearly drawing blood as he struggled through the swell of emotions. He had almost lost them, all of them. It would've been his fault that he would've been standing at a pulpit delivering a eulogy for some of the most important people in his life. In fact for one despairing hour he had thought that he had lost them. During that time an awful feeling of guilt and pure fear had ran through him. He couldn't be alone, and that scared him more than anything in the world, more than pretending to be someone else.
Shawn bent his head down, staring off as he relived the memory.
*The rope bit into Shawn's wrists as he struggled against the bindings. He was tied to a chair sitting on top of the tallest building in Santa Barbara. The man who had previously had his back turned to Shawn turned around and face Shawn. He stepped forward bending down to stare Shawn in the face.
"You know Shawn, I really have yet to see you in complete anguish" He paused smiling his eyes glinting in pleasure as he saw Shawn stiffen when he leaned closer.
"I've seen you scared, I've seen you angry, happy, embarrassed, rude" He paused again his eyes becoming curious
"I've even seen you apologetic and humble. But I've yet to see you in utter despair"
Bile rose in Shawn's throat and he felt waves of anger flowing over him. The man drew closer until his nose was nearly brushing Shawn's.
"I would really like to see that" The man peered at Shawn as if trying to memorize this moment and place it perfectly. Shawn glared back emulating as much resistance he could. The man stepped back the intense atmosphere lost immediately as he became totally aloof. He pulled out a cell phone and turned away from Shawn dialing a number.
"You may go forward" He spoke into the phone. It was all he said but Shawn's eyes widened in realization.
"NO! You can't do this!Please!" Shawn screamed this his cries piercing. They would have been haunting and disturbing to anyone. The raw begging plea enough to scare. But the man continued acting aloof replacing the phone into his pocket as an explosion was heard and saw from the rooftop. The man didn't turn around but instead addressed a invisible person.
"Good bye Detective O'hara, Guster and Henry." It was singsong and echoed along with Shawn's screams.*
Shawn was pulled out of the scene by a car pulling up. He recognized it as Gus's car. Shawn straightened and pulled his sleeve up to wipe away the moisture that had formed there during his reflections. He quickly put on a small reserved smile right before Gus walked through the door.
To say Gus was surprised was an understatement. He hadn't expected to see Shawn let alone see him dressed like a normal office worker. The sight was unnerving especially since Gus hadn't see him since their last case. Gus was mad, upset, and guilty as he thought back to the case. So much had happened some of which he still hadn't figured out. He clearly remembered his last encounter with Shawn as having been a particularly bad fight. He hadn't thought it would've lead anywhere. Yet here they were Psych gone and Shawn doing who the hell knows what. Gus would've guessed Shawn would've left before he would've guessed Shawn would get an office job. So curtly and warily Gus glared at Shawn and gave a short hello mumbling something about cleaning his stuff out of the office.
Shawn nodded his head and cast his eyes away from Gus. He had never looked so dejected. Gus was about to say something when Shawn spoke.
"Sorry, I was just about to leave" With that Shawn rushed out the door. He should have known that Gus hadn't forgiven him. He should've expected that Gus would hate him. Tears slipped down his cheeks as he walked to his car. The only thing that kept him going was imagining the people he cared about opening their arms to him and forgiving him. He didn't want to be alone, it reminded him of when his mom had left. That feeling of despair amd self-hatred that had filled them. How could she leave without even trying to keep him? Had she not wanted him? Did his friend Gus not want him as a friend? He laughed bitterly, of course Gus didn't want him as a friend, he had ruined Gus's life. But that would change, he would change, the old Shawn was going to fade away and then everyone would like Shawn.
Gus watched Shawn leave a slight feeling of loss residing in him, as if he had lost Shawn. He shook his head. What did he care Shawn had nearly gotten him killed and had made it so the love of his life had dumped him. It was high time that Shawn deal with all the problems that he had made. Gus needed some time soon he would be able to be friends again. Shawn would wine and they would get Psych back and everything would go back to normal. But even as Gus told himself this he felt a sense of foreboding welling up.