Not sure where this came from, just a bit of humor to brighten your day!
Disclaimer: I do not own the A-Team.
This, Hannibal thought, was certainly out of the ordinary. Not that any part of their lives could be considered ordinary but this particular situation was definitely weird. While the sight of an agitated and pacing Faceman fell within the realm of normal the hysteria that colored his voice and actions definitely was not. Hannibal found himself caught between amusement and annoyance; as entertaining as a hysterical Face was turning out to be they really needed to get going. Murdock should have BA ready for flight any minute now and he really didn't need two men having a meltdown.
This was actually rather unusual for Face, Hannibal reflected. Over the years he had seen Face at his best and at his worst. He'd seen the younger man charming, cunning, generous, petty, selfless, reflective, silly, serious, and the list went on but hysterical? That was definitely new and Hannibal didn't know how he felt about it. At the moment his usually unflappable second paced and spouted nearly incoherent fragments of sentences. Hannibal wished he knew what set him off but for the last, oh, five minutes Face had been working himself into a bigger and bigger frenzy.
The colonel watched the lieutenant make some unidentifiable motion and choke out unintelligible words and decided now was the time to intervene. Watching the agitated man Hannibal decided he had three options. One: knock him out. Two: drug him. Three: snap him out of it. Considering options one and two would result in an unconscious Face, Hannibal decided to go with option three.
"Face," he called sternly. Face paused and turned to look at his colonel.
*Smack!*
Face's head turned to the left with the force of the blow. For a few moments he simply stood there unmoving. "You with me kid? I can't have you freaking out on me."
"Did you just…slap me?" Face asked incredulously.
"Well I needed to get you attention."
"You slapped me. You slapped me!"
"I think we've established that Face. You ought to thank me; it was the least painful way to get your attention." Did I slap you too hard or not hard enough?
"You slap like a woman!"
Wait, what?
"Excuse me?" Hannibal demanded as he crossed his arms and glared at his lieutenant.
"Not even a young woman. Sister Margaret slapped harder than that and she was 90!"
Ouch. Definitely did not hit hard enough.
"Really?" Hannibal said in a tone that preceded imminent doom. His brow raised as Face began babbling about the varying force his female acquaintances could deliver through a slap. Got a lot of practice in that area, kid? Enough was enough, time for plan B.
"Face." He paused once more.
*THWACK!*
Hannibal smirked in satisfaction as Face dropped without another word. He lit a cigar and glared down at his unconscious second.
"Old lady my ass," he snarled as he moved to grab Face's ankles. At that moment Murdock bounded in.
"BA's all set for take-off colonel…" he trailed off as he watched in puzzlement as Hannibal unceremoniously dragged Face towards the waiting plane. He scratched his head as he observed the strange proceedings. A bit put-out he asked, "Face got a fear of flying now too?"