Hello everybody! This is my very first SasukexNaruto story. Though I'm an old hat at fanfiction. I don't know when it happened or why, but I really can't see them with anyone but each other. I've been pretty into (read obbsessed) with Naruto for a while now and I felt like it was time to try my hand at a fanfiction. I miss writing all the time. Maybe this will spur me back into it. This story was suppossed to be a one shot but is now thirteen pages long with no end in sight and I thought I would split it up a little if only to find someone to beta for me. I have a regular beta but she doesn't feel comfortable with yaoi so I didn't ask her to be involved with this one. If anyone out there is interested in helping me out, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me know. I will never be satisfied with my own work, part of the reason it takes me forever to write these things is because I go over them like 200 times before I will even deem them acceptable, so I would just feel better about my stories if I had someone to look them over with me before I post them. Anyway, I'm thinking that this will be a three or four parter at the very most. I hope that you enjoy it.

Warning: This story is set after Sasuke leaves Konoha for Orochimaru. There is some nasty language. There will eventually be a malexmale relationship, but not until the last chapter. If you don't like that kind of stuff, I advise you not to read it.

Disclaimer: Naruto and all of it's characters and settings are not my property

The walk back to Konoha after being gone for three years was the longest walk of Sasuke's life. He felt like there were two huge weights on his shoulders holding him down and slowing his normally quick and agile movements. One weight he invisioned as having the words I Am A Traitor To My Village emblazoned on the side. This weight was part guilt but mainly apprehension. Would they even let him back in when he got there? Would his plan of blaming it on himself being thirteen and stupid work? Would they believe he'd actually matured and developed enough to understand that he'd done a bad bad thing and wouldn't ever do it again? He could see himself being bodily thrown in jail by his former comrades, and the thought was upsetting. He bore it though because he'd decided before he set out on his journey back to the Leaf Village that he deserved whatever it was they were going to do to him. He deserved it and much more because of the second weight he carried. This weight was bigger and heavier than the other and proclaimed I Almost Killed My Only Friend. It was made up almost entirely of remorse. The Uchiha usually wasn't sorry about anything. He didn't really care how other people saw him. He had a reason for every single thing he did, and up until he decided to leave Orochimaru's corpse and the power of the Cursed Seal behind him, it had been enough that he had never truly felt bad about any of his actions. But this was different. He had only had one real friend in his entire life. There was only one person that he had shared any kind of a true consensual emotional bond with, and his hand still tingled terribly where it had been in his chest whenever the dark haired boy thought about it. Naruto had nearly died. It would have only taken a little more, and Naruto would have been gone. There would have been no more stupid jokes, no more insulting nicknames, no more of Konoha's Ninja Best At Surprising People. No Naruto. And it would have been Sasuke's fault. It was the fact that he had almost killed him that made it anywhere close to bearable. He would not admit to himself that he was afraid. Naruto's possible reaction did not scare him regardless of how many times he saw imagined hatred in the blond's eyes after running through yet another feasible outcome. Those weights along with the one around his neck that he'd gotten used to, I Still Haven't Avenged My Clan By Killing My Insane Brother, made him trudge along at a very un-ninja like pace. Therefore, it took him eight whole days to reach the village including the one he'd spent lying on a lake bed, the weights moved to his chest, watching the sun rise, travel across the sky, and set before watching the moon do the same. It was mid-afternoon when he arrived in front of the large wooden gates and he felt a small amount of Uchiha pride welling up inside him. He had decided that he was returning, and though he had stopped for a while, after leaving that compound he never once looked back.

ANBU greeted him after a few moments as he expected, and he was led through town to the Hokage's office after he told them his reasons for being there. I'm back. He was again at his normal speed, refusing to show any outward signs of distress, and ignored the whispers of the villagers, the squeals of delight from what was left of his fan club, and the angry mutterings of some ninjas. He had prepared himself for this. It was in most of his senarios. He was surprised that the guards allowed him to walk between them without holding on to him and took it as a fairly positive sign. When an Uchiha said something, it was the truth. Regardless of whether it was good or bad, it was said with the same conviction that made people believe it. He was glad that he had predicted that he might see Kakashi in the tower. He was lounging against a wall reading a small orange book. Sasuke watched as the Copy Nin looked up and held his eye as he passed by. Yes, I'm walking to the Hokage's office. Make of it what you will. He had been ready for the return look. You almost killed your only friend. And though the weight was suddenly heavier, Sasuke did not break his stride. He knew what was coming. He was ready with an explanation. Whatever happened after that was beyond his control. When he stopped in front of the Hokage's door, the moment before an ANBU with a wolf mask knocked on it, he heard something that he had not planned for.

"But Tsunade-bachan..."

And Sasuke froze. He had expected to see Naruto, he wasn't stupid. Probably not before meeting the Hokage, but certainly soon after. He wouldn't even have to go looking. The blond would hear of his return and come looking for him, most likely to kick his ass. That was alright. He could do that. He wanted Naruto to beat the snot out of him because he deserved it, and he didn't want to apologize. The thought of it was acrid in his mouth. So... I'm sorry. It was inadequate and stupid. But Naruto was inside. He was going to see him plead his case. There was no way the blond would leave. How was he supposed to do this when Naruto was there? Naruto who he almost murdered.

"Shut up, brat! Come in!"

The door swung open, and there he was leaning over Tsunade's desk. A million things were running through Sasuke's head as he looked at his tensed back. He's right there. I can't run away from this. He's gotten taller. His hair has grown out a little. What will he say? He changed his stupid outfit. Where is that lame sling shot thing? What is his obsession with orange? He's right there. Does he know it's me? Like he'd forget my chakra. He's stronger. He has a lot more muscle. Why isn't he breathing? Why am I not breathing? What expression is he wearing? He hates me. He must. Does he have a scar? Will my fingers match up to it? He's right there! Say something! The silence was palatable. The ANBU were staring at Tsunade. She was slack jawed and gaping at Sasuke. Sasuke had slightly widened eyes on Naruto, who continued to lean over the desk. It was only a few seconds, but it felt like much much longer. Then something that hadn't even crossed Sasuke's mind happened. Naruto looked over his shoulder with the happiest smile the dark haired boy had ever seen.

"Took you long enough, Sasuke-teme."

"Not everyone is on your time table, dobe." It came without even thinking. It was as natural as breathing, and Sasuke felt his weights drop to the floor.

"Didn't I tell you he'd come back, ya old hag?" he threw out casually, still smiling. Tsunade continued open mouthed staring.

"Yeah, you did."

And just like that, the hardest part was over. Naruto had said he would come back, and he did. He was surprised at the amount of lienency he got. He could still be a ninja, even though he was technically only a gennin until he finished the exams. There was to be a jounin stationed inside the Uchiha complex at all times for at least three years. It irked him, but it was only three years. That meant when he was nineteen and had proven himself a faithful member of the village with no intention of sneaking off to gain more power by serving enemies and turning against teammates, he could lead the normal ninja life he'd always wanted. And it seemed Naruto had forgiven him before he'd even gotten home. Things fell into a regular rhythm and soon he was teamed up with a jounin named Kanami, whom he was sure had passed her jounin exam through some kind of a fluke, and two young teammates. The boy, Daisuke, reminded him of a young Hinata with red hair and a constantly runny nose. His cheeks were almost continually tinted pink, and Sasuke was miffed at how he seemed painfully shy and nervous. The girl, Kaori, had two long braids of dark brown hair and was just as wild and overwhelmingly annoying as Naruto had been when he was her age. Plus she, like most other females in Konoha including his instructor try as she might to hide it, had a crush on Sasuke. She constantly clung to him and loudly announced her intentions at regular intervals. I'm gonna kiss you so good, you just wait. And the only reason the dark-haired teen didn't beat the crap out of her wasn't because she was a thirteen year-old girl but because she really did remind him of his blue-eyed friend. Sasuke couldn't hate her because when she stuck out her tongue at him, he imagined the whisker like scars and a shock of yellow. He could never hate the memories of his happier days. Of the time before he left. That did not stop him from sneering, making snide comments, or generally being an asshole though. He was Uchiha Sasuke. There were some things that would never change.

Every Tuesday and Friday at 2pm, barring those days when either was away on a mission, he would meet with Naruto for lunch at Ichiraku Ramen. The first time had been strange. It was the day he returned. He had sat on the stool, Naruto beside him, in a daze. It felt unreal. Was he dreaming? Reliving a memory? Everything was the same as he remembered it. The faded menu on the wall, the man cooking the noodles, the old barstools with their cracked leather covering, Naruto. It was all the just like it was before. And he felt terribly out of place. He wasn't the same. Sasuke had changed while he was gone. Thirteen to sixteen was a big jump, and he had grown while he was away from the village. He had developed under the tutalage of an evil madman. He had realized that he didn't want to be that man, didn't want to give his body up. He wanted to defeat Itachi himself, to feel his brother's blood on his hands. He wanted to restore his clan. He wanted his friend back. He had been a missing-nin and now had returned as a vastly overqualified gennin. His goals may have remained constant, but Sasuke was different somehow. The overwhelming sameness bothered him. He found himself wondering if time had stopped when he left, if Naruto had been asleep all this time and was telling Tsunade he was finally awake when the Uchiha had come back. As two bowls of steaming noodles were placed in front of them, Sasuke decided it was time to speak to the blond who had not said a word since he had proposed getting ramen.

"Naruto, I-"

"If you leave again, I won't chase after you to bring you back," Naruto glared at him, his blue eyes cold and hard, "I will kill you." And Sasuke believed it. He had to bite back the reply of Like you could kill me, dobe. when vivid images of the blond surrounded by that horrifying red chakra assaulted his mind. His fingers tingled again. Naruto had changed too.

"I'm back," he said instead, calmly and confidently. Naruto smiled widely as if he hadn't just threatened his newly returned friend, and dove into his ramen. Sasuke didn't eat. He watched the blond. Then he watched the noodle man cook. Back to the blond again, happily munching away. His fingers continued to tingle terribly. He sighed.

"Naruto... I-" The other boy lifted his hand to stop him, not even looking up from his meal.

"Not today, teme. Later. Today we're eating ramen together and celebrating the fact that you stopped being such an usurakontachi," he stressed the word Sasuke had used in reference to him so many times, "and came back where you belong."

"Hn. Dobe." He didn't even try to hide his tiny smile as he started eating too.

Later didn't come for 8 months. It was a Tuesday afternoon. Sasuke was walking up to the ramen stand when he noticed that his friend was not sitting at his usual spot but was standing outside leaning on the wall. The pale boy raised an eyebrow as he approached.

"The Chunnin exam is coming, teme."

"I'm aware, dobe." Naruto pushed away from the wall and began walking away.

"So let's go." Sasuke stood confused for half a moment before following. Soon he found himself on the familiar path to their old training ground. He stood there and looked at the three wooden poles for a moment. That was where it all really started. He had given up his lunch despite the risks. He had accepted Naruto and his annoying loudness and clumsiness as part of his team and passed Kakashi's exam. That acceptance was what made him a ninja. No one else had ever passed before. The three of us are one. And he had meant it. But he had left. Sakura was working in the hospital. He barely ever saw her, and when he did, there was this look in her eyes that he knew meant she was only being nice for Naruto's sake. What had become of them? What had ripped apart Team 7? Betrayal, his mind supplied.

"What are we doing here, dobe? Not reminiscing I hope. I have better things to do." Naruto scowled.

"Shut up, teme. I didn't bring you here for that."

"Then what?" He watched the blond crouch into a fighting position.

"Let's spar." Sasuke frowned. They had not sparred since he came back. They had not touched at all. The last time Sasuke had touched him... His frown deepened as his fingers tingled.

"No. I have teammates to spar with." Naruto laughed out loud.

"Little Daisuke? That annoying Kaori? They're nowhere near your level, teme." Sasuke smirked.

"She's not as annoying as you, usurakontachi."

"At least I don't run around declaring my undying love for you all the time. Oh Saaasuke-kun! You are sooooo unbeliveably gorgeous! I'm gonna kiss you aaaaall over!" He swayed his hips and put his hand over his heart, batting his eyelashes.

"Hn." Sasuke turned around to leave determined not to let the blond goad him into a fight. He didn't want to spar with him. The memories were too much.

Then Naruto ran around him and punched him hard in the face. Sasuke's eyes widened, and he launched a fist back. The fight was vicious and hard. It felt good for them to fight each other. It felt right. The Uchiha slid into it easily because he knew Naruto. He knew where the punches were going and when the clones would come. Just like the demon vessel knew him. They fought with everything they had until there was nothing left, and they lay there spent in the grass in front of the three wooden poles. Sasuke turned his head to look at the other boy who had done the same. There was dirt smudging their cheeks. The edge of his horrid orange jacket had been singed. Their breath was coming in harsh pants.

"Dobe."

"What is it, teme?"

"I almost killed you." He couldn't dodge it anymore, couldn't let it fester inside him any longer.

"But you didn't." Sasuke furrowed his eyebrows. What kind of reply was that?

"I left. I betrayed this village. You forgave me. Why?" Naruto lifted himself up on his elbows and looked down at him.

"You came back." Sasuke lifted himself up too.

"So? Why does that matter? Don't you remember what I did to you?" He noticed Naruto's frown and seemingly unconscious movement of his hand over his chest, "How can you just forgive me like that? You chased after me. You tried to make me stay, and I left you for dead. It shouldn't be that easy!" Naruto continued to frown for a moment before softly shaking his head.

"You came back, Sasuke."

"That's not good enough. You hated me. You should hate me even more now."

"I don't. I didn't. Well, I did, but that was a long time ago." Sasuke laid back down, frustrated. He heard Naruto flop to the ground as well. The sun was setting and the clouds were taking on pink and orange hues. The wind blew gently over them.

"Why not? And don't give me the same answer again, dobe. I know it's not just that."

"I wasn't going to, teme..." There was silence between them for a few minutes. Sasuke was about to ask his question again with more force when Naruto spoke up.

"Do you remember that fight? The one with Haku?" Sasuke thought for a moment.

"Haku?"

"Yeah. The mirrors guy.When we were protecting the bridge builder in the Country of Waves."

"Yes."

"That was when I stopped hating you. Or at least that's when I realized I'd stopped hating you. I passed out, remember?" Sasuke nodded. He remembered that day very clearly.

"When I woke up, you were in front of me. Haku said you jumped in front of the trap. You saved me, Sasuke. You saved me, and then I thought you died. I watched you die right there in my arms. Do you remember what you said?" He frowned.

"I said that I hated you."

"Yeah. And I said that I hated you too. I said that I hated you, and then I started crying because I didn't hate you anymore. I was so sad Sasuke. I was so sad because you were dead. And you died protecting me."

"My body moved on it's own."

"Yeah. You said that too." The brunette's frown deepened.

"I didn't want your tears."

"I didn't want to give them to you, teme. They came on their own." A few birds flew across the sky above them.

"How did Kakashi beat that guy, dobe?" Naruto laughed somewhat bitterly.

"Kakashi didn't beat him. I did." Sasuke sat up.

"Stop lying, usurakontachi." Naruto continued staring up at the sky.

"I'm not lying, teme. I beat him. There's not many people in the world that really matter to me, not many that care about me. You know that I've been alone. You know how that feels."

"Yes," he replied without hesitation. He knew exactly how that felt.

"At that time, there was only Iruka-sensei. He was like a dad almost, or a really nice uncle. That was the only person who had acknowledged me. Everyone else just hated me, even you. But you were different. You were Sasuke. You were the closest thing to a friend I had, and he killed you. I thought you were dead there in my arms. I felt something I'd never ever felt before. I wanted to destroy Haku. I wanted to rip him into pieces for what he did. And then something I thought was impossible happened." Sasuke's eyes widened slightly.

"Kyuubi."

"Yeah. Kyuubi. It was the very first time. I shattered his mirrors."

"Shattered?"

"Yup. Almost killed him. Only stopped because he jumped in front of Kakashi's attack to save Zabuza. I was only twelve. I had never killed anybody. But I would have. I wanted to because of what he did to you." Sasuke looked down at him for a while. The sun continued its slow descent on the horizon. The silence felt good and comfortable.

"Teme?"

"Hn."

"Can I ask you something?" Black eyes watched as he continued to stare at the sky.

"Why did you-" Sasuke let out a heavy sigh.

"I left because I needed more power. How could I expect to defeat Itachi when-" Naruto shot up and slammed his fist into the ground leaving a divot.

"God damn it, you stupid bastard! Let me finish my goddamn question! I already know why you left, and honestly I don't even care anymore! I wanna know why you came back, teme!" Sasuke stared quietly into big blue eyes for a moment. What should I say?

"Answer me! Why?"

"I stopped hating you that day too." Naruto nodded, his glare demanding he continue.

"You had Iruka, dobe. And Kakashi too, for whatever that's worth. But who did I have?"

"You had me, teme. You'll always have me. We're friends, right?" Part of the Uchiha was pleased at the slight pleading tone in his voice.

"Yes," he said with a firm nod, "so I came back." Naruto smiled brightly, and Sasuke refused to allow the small grin that pulled at his lips. He felt stupid telling him, but it needed to be said. Sasuke came back because all he had was Naruto, and he knew that all the blond had was him.

"You're team's coming to find you."

"I know."

"Oi! Kanami, Kaori, Daisuke! We're over here!" The three over them hurried over.

"Where were you, my sweet Sasuke-kun?"

"Here."

"Let's all go for ramen! I'm hungry because I skipped my lunch to help train the teme. It'll be Uchiha's treat!" He pumped a fist in the air and jumped up. Sasuke frowned but got up and followed the four of them to the ramen stand.

A/N: Well, there you have it. I know that this first chapter is a bit chliche in the world of SasuNaru fiction, but trust me when I say that there is definately more to this story. It will continue on until both men are probably in their late 20's/ early 30's. Once again if you want to help me out by betaing, please let me know. Expect the next chapter soon since it's already written. Please let me know whether or not you liked it by clicking that little review button.

THANKS!