Alone, Or Am I?
Iain's car sped away, her friends had walked away. They'd all abandoned her and it was all her fault. She stood right there, in the same spot in the car park, for what seemed like an eternity. Silent tears made their way down her cheeks. Ducking her head and wrapping her jacket around her frame she began the journey home, stopping off at the local off-license on the way home.
"You're insane"
"Just get some help will you"
Rita kept replaying Iain's words over and over in her head. They stung, but they were right, she was insane, she did need help, but god she didn't deserve it. She looked down at the bottle in her hands, how she longed to feel the burning liquid trickling down her throat, but she couldn't do it, could she?
The internal debate continued until she broke, 'Fuck it' she thought, 'I've got nothing to lose'. The lid made a satisfying cracking sound as it opened. She stared into the opening of the bottle before tipping it up and taking a swig.
Rita grinned at the instant relief that the drink provided her and took another swig, then another, and another, she was waiting for the drink to take the desired effect.
Half an hour had passed, and the alcohol had begun to work its magic. She slid down onto the floor, stumbling to grab hold of the kitchen counter-top in a feeble attempt to keep herself upright. If only she could stay like this forever, she thought.
But then the tears started, it was as though the reality of what had happened had just hit her, and it hit her like a truck. She was alone, dumped, abandoned, her friends hated her and it was all her fault, She'd lied to them and now she was all alone, with no one to turn to Rita allowed the now uncontrollable sobs to wrack her body. She didn't want to be alone, she just wanted someone to be there for her, someone to love her, that's all, it's all she ever wanted, but yet again she had fucked up. Mark had left her and now Iain. Rita let out a wobbly sigh before clumsily standing and making her way upstairs bottle in tow, leaning heavily against the wall.
Half way up the stairs Rita stumbled. Somehow she managed to stay upright despite, spilling some of the contents of the bottle.
"Oh, for fuck's sake" Rita cursed holding the bottle up towards the beam of light from the window, "It's all good, there's some left," she told herself, giggling softly. Before completing her journey up the stairs and entering her bathroom, albeit with less coordination than Bambi on ice.
Rita took a deep breath and leaned against the door frame. She walked over, or rather, stumbled over, to the sink. She looked up, her reflection stared back at her in the mirror. "Idiot" She scoffed "Oh just piss off will you!" She shouted, punching the mirror. The surface cracked.
"Whatever" Rita said, she didn't care anymore. She opened up the cabinet door. A shiny metal object gleamed up at her. Picking up the blade, she ran her finger across it before running it along her wrist, expecting the consequential relief to hit her she waited, but she couldn't feel anything, she felt numb. She cut again, and again, and again, but once again, she still felt numb.
She threw the blade across the room, it tumbled into the bath tub. Picking up the once discarded bottle of vodka, Rita's body swayed slightly as she took another drink, losing her balance she toppled over, she collapsed onto the cold tiled floor wishing to feel something, for someone to care...
Meanwhile, Dylan was video-calling Zoe. He was telling her how his day had been, filling her in with the ever recent events that his so-called father had thrown upon him.
"So how's the team?" Zoe asked
"Still shambles in my opinion," Dylan told her
"How so?" Zoe asked, reaching for her wine glass, tucking her legs under her body and relaxing onto her sofa
"I don't like to gossip Zo"
"Yes, Dyl, but I do, so come on, spill the beans"
"Charlie's been suspended, though he's back now, apparently, Mac got himself hooked on pharmaceuticals and Charlie was covering for him and hiding the drugs, which Elle, your replacement, had found and reported him"
"Well, that's shit" Zoe commented, "Though you said he was back right?"
"Yes, he was reinstated the other day"
"What else?, That's pretty average for Holby ED if I remember correctly, not enough to be classed as shambles by the almighty Dylan Keogh"
"Iain ended things with Rita" Dylan almost confessed "It was pretty ugly really"
"How so?" Zoe asked concerned for her friend
"She'd lied to him, told him that her ex-husband had hit her and slashed her tyres"
"Fuck"
"Yes, I'd have to agree on that"
"How did Iain take it?"
"Not very well, he basically called her insane and told her to get help in front of most of the team"
"So they all know that she lied?"
"Yes"
"Damn" Zoe was alarmed "Look, Dylan, I know that you hate to get involved with people's personal life's but I need you to check on Rita"
"Zoe, I don't think it's my place" Dylan tried to object
"Look, I wouldn't ask if I thought she had someone else, just please check on her, for me!" Zoe pleaded
"Why?" Dylan asked
"She's had it tough in the past, how do I put it, she can be pretty clueless sometimes when it comes to handling her emotions safely"
"So like, what, drugs, alcohol?" Dylan asked, to which he didn't receive an immediate reply, "Come on Zoe, I need to know what I'm going to be dealing with here"
"This stays between us okay" Zoe checked, to which Dylan nodded "She drinks, or rather drank and she's attempted suicide a couple of times in the past"
"Ah," Dylan commented, "So what's her address?"
"I got a text from her the other day with her new one on, I'll forward it to you now"
"I've got it, I'll see you later then," Dylan said
"Okay, good luck, keep me updated Dylan, Thanks again"
"Yeah, whatever" Dylan replied with a quick wave before shutting the lid of the laptop and setting out to find Rita's address.
A/N: Please review and let me know what you think, is this any good. Would you like more? Let me know. I plan to upload another chapter within the next couple of days but please don't hold me to this as I am working a double weekend. Thanks. Nat xx