Hi – This is first of a multi chapter that I have been working on. I have no idea how many chapters there will be because, well, I have decided o the end yet…Here goes…
Gillian had spent the first 30 minutes of the Christmas party faking a festive smile and making polite conversation. It was only when Cal, accompanied by Emily, entered the room that she felt her spirits finally lift.
Now, as she watched him move round the room doing his 'duty' socialising, she could see through the fake smile and recognised that he was very tired, and still tense.
After what he had just returned from it was hardly surprising and a Christmas party would be the last thing he needed, but he was doing his best, for Emily.
Mentally shaking herself free from Cal, Gillian started to 'work the room'.
Emily had really made a wonderful job of the decorations, Gillian allowed herself a slight smile though when she realized that there seemed to be a more than liberal amount of mistletoe hanging from any available space. As she moved round the room she herself was getting caught by it on several occasions. But it was nothing compared to the way the female members of staff were strategically placing themselves directly under the festive berries as soon as Cal moved anywhere near them.
About an hour later, and after several refills form the punch bowl, Gill was finally feeling more relaxed and happy. She realized she had lost track of Cal and tried to locate him in the crowd. He had disappeared.
Instinctively she knew where he had gone and started to move towards the door that led through his office and into his library, his own little sanctuary.
As she got to the door she found herself hesitating briefly, she was a friend though, and simply concerned that he was coping ok. Self delusion could be a very useful tool at times.
She slipped quietly through the door and immediately saw him lying on his back on the couch, beer bottle in hand.
He turned his head slightly and stared at her. Seconds seemed to hang in the air as Gill wondered who would be the first to break the silence. Cal turned his head away from her and again stared at the ceiling. "I'm taking a break" He almost spat out the words. More silence, he was waiting for her to say something but she kept quiet. "Look" he started again "I have been out there for over an hour, being nice, and listening to that crap music, I'm beginning to get RSI from pulling bloody over-priced crackers, and I've got sore cheeks from being kissed under what appears to be an over abundance of what is basically a weed with poisonous berries on it" There was a brief respite and again she stayed silent as he turned his head back to face her again. "So I'm taking a break, and I don't care how much you accuse me of being a miserable, reclusive, anti-social, self centred old git, nuffin is going to get me back out there again in under 30 minutes"
Gill flashed him one of her well practiced, 'sweet' smiles, "that's fine" she said, keeping her voice modulated and calm.
She saw a very brief perplexed look flash across his face that was very quickly replaced by a cynical grimace. More silence.
With a short intake of breath Cal swung his legs round and pushed himself up from the comfort of his couch. Purposely he walked straight past her and over to his mini fridge. Pulling out another bottle and flipping the lid off he turned toward her, "so what are you doing still standing there then?"
"Has it occurred to you that I might need a little break too?"
With a few short steps he was suddenly standing right in front of her and she was getting that 'Lightman' stare.
"Liar. You love all that rubbish out there. What do you want Foster?"
"What makes you think I want something?"
"That's an evasion, and a bad one luv"
Gillian let out an audible sigh, shifting her weight slightly to her other foot "I've been feeling a little left out"
Cal took a couple of steps backwards, his eyes still fixed on her face, "Would you like to explain that statement to me"
Gillian grinned and raised her eyes upwards to where she had previously noticed another of Emily's strategically hung bunches of mistletoe. Cal followed her gaze and then returned to Gills eyes. He smiled at her. Gill could see that although it was genuine there was still a hint of that 'I don't believe you' lurking at the back of it.
"You only had to ask luv"
It only took a couple of seconds for Cal to step closer to her and start to move his mouth towards her cheek, but in that small fraction of time a crazy impulse took over her and just as he was about to brush his lips across the side of her face she turned her head and felt his lips meet hers. Almost at the same moment she brought her hand up so that just her fingertips were softly touching Cals jaw, it kept them together for about a second longer.
Cal broke the contact by taking a small step backwards. His face was completely guarded, as hard as she tried Gillian could read nothing, she no idea what he was thinking.
With a cheeky little grin and a short laugh Cal shifted his gaze away from her, "I think you've had one too many refills from that punch bowl luv" Gill let her face drop down, she didn't want him to see the flash of annoyance that she felt. Sarcasm, Cals standard fallback when he was put in a position that he didn't want to face or deal with. Well he wasn't the only one who could play that game. Lifting her face, she again encountered the closed expression on Cals face.
"I was just trying to prevent further damage" she said using her best light and jokey voice.
"What" came the staccato reply
" Your cheeks. You mentioned earlier that they were sore, so I just thought I'd give them a rest"
"That's very," he paused briefly, searching for the right word, "considerate of you"
"I'm a very considerate person Cal, it tends to be you that has a deficit in that area isn't it"
During this short sparring match Gillian had unconsciously straightened her body, there had been a slight lift to her chin, and she had crossed her arms in front of her,
"Yeah, alright luv, it was just a kiss, why are you getting so defensive and tetchy about it?"
Gill suddenly felt completely deflated, 'just a kiss'. So his pulse hadn't instantly doubled, there was no blood rush to his head, no inner shiver.
She turned and pulled open the door, pausing momentarily she said, without even turning her head back to him, "Your 30 minutes are up". The door slide shut as she walked away.
Finding the first sheltered corner she could, Gill stood as a tear slid silently down her face. She gave herself a few moments and remembered the feel of his lips on hers, his warm breath that she had felt as they had parted. She was sure that in that tiny fraction of suspended time she had seen – something in his eyes. Was she right or was it just another bout of self delusion. Would she ever know with Cal?
She looked round to his office door, it remained shut, it looked like he was staying in there.
In a strange way she was glad. Taking a deep breath she prepared herself to re enter the party
social scene, her first move was towards the punch bowl.