This is my take on events after Poison of Interest. I just felt some kind of way then I felt another kind of way. So this is it. And someone has to agree that the police should be looking for the person who distributed the video of Danny and Lacey because that person is distributing porn, right? If I'm wrong someone let me know.
The video came out. Despite my best efforts. But that wasn't all I was concerned about. I was worried that my friendship with Jo might not make it through this. Yeah, she really didn't have any right to be as upset as she was, but no one's perfect, and I'm pretty sure she felt like a fool for loving someone who was with someone else. Someone who was becoming her best friend again. But I couldn't tell her about me and Danny. It was clearly out of concern for her, but I'm sure no one would see it that way because Jo was upset; so, it had to be a malicious act, right. She wasn't the only person who was getting a friend back, so was I. I didn't want to mess that up.
We were finally getting back to us. Not us, us. We could never be that. It had been three years since we were anything close to resembling friends. We'd had so many different experiences, travelled down two completely different paths for so long. I knew we could never have been what we were before Danny murdered his aunt. We could never be that again, but we were becoming friends. Maybe even best friends. But that creep had to record Danny and me and distribute it to the whole school. Per the law, this person should technically be in jail. There should be an investigation. That was practically porn. Am I right?
What really hurt, though, was finding out that Jo loved Danny. I had no idea. How would I have known? She wasn't confiding in me, and I wasn't confiding in her. There was no way either of us could have known anything about the other. Not at that time. It wasn't until after Danny's trial thing that she finally decided to open up to me. Not before, which she could have done, instead of going to speak on his behalf without me. I might have gone to help, had either of them given me the opportunity, but why would I expect anything more from Jo or Danny. I wasn't really inside their loop. However, take it for Danny to know everything.
He didn't seem too surprised by the revelation, which if I was to be honest, he always seemed to know a lot more about a lot things than he let on. He is not as innocent or sincere as he portrays. That's why I found it hard to fall in love with him. I do have strong feelings for him, very strong, but love requires trust and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't trust him. He never gave me any reason to. He was always so elusive with me. Always deflecting with kisses and jokes. Not to mention he seemed way too concerned about everything happening in Jo's life. I wasn't jealous. No. Because, I believed he genuinely had some kind of feelings for me, but she came first. There's no questioning that. Maybe that's why after everything he'd lied about and kept from us Jo could still love him. How she fell in love with him, I can only wonder about, but she did. Whether it was induced by him or not. She loved him. She loved Danny even though she didn't trust him. I commend her for that.
Jo's not like me in that respect. I couldn't bring myself to love someone that, in all truthfulness, I didn't really know. We didn't get to know each other again. We just dove into a heated physical relationship with no ground work or foundation. We were doomed from the beginning. It was inevitable that we would end at some point. Too many things were unsaid and Danny refused to discuss anything with me. He had Jo for that. Eventually, I did too.
I should have told her. Danny wanted to. He always wanted to tell Jo. Everything. I didn't want to tell her this. I was too afraid of things being weird between the three of us. Our start was one of the most rocky there could have been. Not just from her end but also from mine. We had unsettled issues that Danny was forcing us to hash out in front of him. Not because we wanted to but because he wanted us to. I bet we would have done anything for him. That's why our efforts - me and Jo - at being friends didn't work. It would have been for all the wrong reasons, and that's why I couldn't tell her. I had just invaded their little private club. We were just beginning to break past all of our issues. How could I shake the fragile foundation that we'd just started to build? I didn't want that. I didn't want to lose my new relationship with Jo. Or Danny. He couldn't see that, though. I figure he thought I was just being selfish. I wasn't. I kept my silence about Danny and me for all of us. I'm sure Jo would have done the same.
Jo and I are so much more alike, even though we seem completely different. Neither of us would ever admit that under threat of death, but it's true. We're both stubborn and passionate people and a whole lot of other things. Even though I seem, almost docile, maybe even difficult, I am a very emotional person, just like Jo; however, unlike Jo, I don't wear every emotion I'm experiencing on my sleeve, or face for that matter. That's just not who I am. It's not how I deal with things. I like to handle things in my own time. Just like Jo. One of our most obviously shared attributes is that we need space. We need time to process, to wind down, and allow our hotheads to cool, or sulk if the occasion calls for it.
After the school hearing, Jo confessing her love for Danny, and the release of the video, I respected her need for space. I gave her time to cool down. I gave her time to come to terms with whatever it was that she needed to come to terms with. I would have wanted the same if it were me. I couldn't say the same for Danny. He's persistent. Too persistent sometimes. He wanted to make her forgive us on his time not hers (not that forgiveness was necessarily needed). He wanted to make her understand our reasoning. He didn't understand that she wouldn't be in any mood to hear anything from either us the day after everything went down, but he wouldn't listen to me.
He tried, but it didn't work.
I would try to talk to her later.
Okay, I know you're wondering where this is going, but just hang in there all you Lacey fans and even Jo fans, and Danny fans. Things have to unfold. This was just the set up. But don't expect any other POVs because you won't be getting any; this is all in Lacey's POV because honestly we don't get enough of it on the show.
So let me know what you think. Like or dislike. (Really doesn't matter because I will be posting this to completion whether you review or not :) )
The next update should be up tomorrow.
Thanks for reading!
nakala