Summary: 'tis a serious crack-fic featuring the unlikely pairing of LustxGluttony. It was a request from a friend, and I hope she enjoys it. A one-shot. R&R. I don't claim any of the FMA characters of my own, by the way. oo;
The pair sat side-by-side, draped by the elongated shadows of dusk, both lost in their own thoughts. Summer nights in the city always came about the same way; the sun always dimmed around half past seven, the street-lights always flipped on at a quarter to eight, and the bustling world of daytime was slowly engulfed by darkness. Like clockwork, once the street-lights came on the chatter of everyday people—the daytime people—began to fade away as well. Everyone went back to their homes, their sanctuaries, and more often than not never set a foot outside again until morning. Thus, the cycle was never-ending for the daytime people.
Smiling coyly and pulling her legs up so that her knees touched the bottom of her chin, the enchantingly dark woman on the right side of an discarded wooden crate gazed thoughtfully at the ground, which was littered with trash and other objects that had been carelessly tossed away by the daytime people. 'Well, this is an alleyway…' she inwardly mused, her rose-pink eyes scanning her surroundings disdainfully. 'Here you are again, sitting on a stack of cardboard crates, and for what? What exactly are you looking for… or waiting for, if that's the case?' Sighing, she tugs at the hems of her long dark green dress, not wanting to ruin her almost seductive lady-like posture by having her ever-so-suave clothing rise up just a little too far. Not like there was really anyone else around to witness such a scandalous display of ivory-white leg, but one could never be too careful, no?
"…Lust…?"
Jolted out of her own appearance-centered thoughts, the raven-haired woman smiles slightly and tilts her gaze to the figure on her left. "Gluttony?"
"If you died, what would I do?"
Her eyes fluttering wide-open at the surprising question, a shocked giggle escaping from her mouth involuntarily, Lust gawks at her partner in crime with a mixture of questioning apprehension and pure surprise. "I see you weren't thinking of your next meal, for a change… er, wow… I don't know, what would you do if I died?"
The round, darkly-clad figure to her left shrugged his shoulders and sighed deeply, sticking his finger into his mouth in his trademark expression of thoughtlessness. "Never mind."
Lust, however, wasn't fooled. "You can't just leave me hanging like this, you idiot! And don't pretend to have forgotten the subject, either!" Growling irately, the woman jumps up, stretching out her legs, and crosses her arms across her chest, fixating her now sharp and calculating gaze on the figure beside her. "Well Gluttony, answer the question! What would you do if I died?"
His endless, eerily white eyes flicking back and forth nervously, Gluttony sighs once more and mutters, more to himself than to the woman beside him, "I don't know… would it even be possible to live without you? Ugh… just leave me alone, Lust."
Feeling the strong warmth of a blush rising to her cheeks, Lust sighs deeply and sits back down on the crate, reclining backwards in order to lean against the stone wall. "Oh come on, Gluttony… how long have we been together, for? You, me, and Envy are a team. Have been for a long time, as a matter of fact. You can tell me anything—anything at all—and I'll listen. So long as it's not a ranting about food, of course, because you know how that annoys me."
Gluttony smirks slightly, his cueball-like head beginning to shake in skepticism. "But isn't that all I ever think and talk about? Food?"
Bringing her fist down forcefully on Gluttony's shoulder, Lust mutters something unintelligible under her breath before turning to face him, her eyes blazing angrily. "Don't start getting all melancholy on me now, you fool! You know… you know that I know you better than that! I know Envy and I may tease you about having a one-track mind on food, but that's just because… because we're friends! If it makes you feel better, I tease Envy about being shallow all the time and… and… I know you all think I'm a selfish, cheatin'-!"
His head suddenly perking up, Gluttony frowns and gently clutches at the dark glove-covered hand on his shoulder. "No, I don't."
Teary-eyed, a gently smile forms on Lust's face. "Well… maybe you don't… I know you're a lot more thoughtful and understanding than I lot of people think. And, to top it off, you're not judgmental. For a Homunculi, you're actually not so bad, Gluttony."
Gluttony snickers under his breath and gazes quizzically at Lust. "Yeah, right. I'm a swell guy, aren't I? But y'know… you aren't all that bad either. Sometimes, I don't think you even realize how great of a person you really are."
Speechless for the second time in one night, the dark-haired woman smirks slightly to herself and stands up again, pausing only to cup her companion's chin with her hand kiss him gently on the cheek. "You know what… if our lives were different—normal, I guess—I think I might just fall for a guy like you. In fact, somehow, I think I have fallen for a guy like you." Turning on her heel, Lust tips her head back, allowing her glossy, ebony locks to cascade down her back in her trademark look of deadly passion. "Come, Gluttony… we have work to do tonight."