It was a well known fact that Ignis loves cooking. He can be seen experimenting with flavors with the meals he creates and coming up with new recipes.

His recipe ideas often come to him after trying a new dish, seeing one being eaten, or he happens to catch the scent of a mouth watering aroma. Yes, almost anything can trigger Ignis' imagination of new recipes to be added to his growing personal cookbook. Heck even battles give him ideas.

So it's no surprise to Noctis when Ignis suddenly stops eating his quiche and pulls out his infamous black notebook. He studies the tart for a few seconds before taking another bite, chewing it slowly as he taps his pen against his chin. He nods scribbling down whatever came to his mind before piercing the crust, lifting it to eye level, and pops it into his mouth. Noctis smirks as he watches the older man writing in his book.

The prince chuckles "You're freaking out the waitress Specs." He says playfully.

"Probably think he's a food critic." Gladiolus laughs "He looks like he could be one, with that constant tasting and writing." He adds.

"Ha, I actually think Iggy would be like that one guy who is a super famous chef. You know the one, he screams at people when they can't cook right or their food isn't fresh." Prompto says taking another bite of his ranch drowned salad.

However, Ignis was deep in the recipe book to even acknowledge his friends banter. Even when their plates were whisked away he didn't look up from his notes.

It actually took Noctis, placing a hand on his friends' back and calling his name to snap him out of his trance.

"Specs, c'mon we're leaving."

"Ah, apologies..."

This was a common exchange between them whenever they went out to eat, before Noctis turns to leave the restaurant. Ignis would pay, gather up his book and pen and joins the others outside.

One day while helping out a local vendor collect vegetables from their garden, Prompto, out of pure curiosity asks "Hey Ignis, what will you do if you ever lose your notebook?"

Ignis simply laughs as if the idea of his book simply vanishing or getting lost was the most silliest idea he has ever heard.

He smiles and says "Nothing. For I have no plans of losing it."

Okay well that made sense to the blonde, sort of. He knew Ignis wouldn't lose it if he was extra careful but the possibility of it getting lost was still there. With a small sigh he tried a different question "Well, you're bound to run out of pages, what will you do then?"

"Rest assured, I have a back up."

"With the same recipes?"

"Yes."

"So you don't need that one that you carry on you."

"I do."

Ignis' tone was firm and sharp almost as if he was angry. "I have my reasons as to why I keep this note on my persons at all times. And I would greatly appreciate the consideration of us dropping the subject or I will make toast for dinner."

The others fall silent for they were not entirely sure what brought on such ferocity in Ignis. But it was mostly because the idea of a measly piece of toast for dinner was the bane of their existence.

The group works silently collecting the crops, when Ignis suddenly stops, he had collected a bell pepper, and immediately thought of a stuffed bell pepper recipe. One that would certainly get the prince to eat the vegetable.

There wasn't a moment of hesitation when he whips out his notebook and jots down the needed ingredients, only to declare his all to popular catchphrase, when he finished.

"That's it!"

"What's it?"

"I've come up with a new recipe!"

"Can't wait to try it."

•••

That night as Ignis put his new recipe to the test, Prompto, Noctis, and Gladiolus were sitting together quietly talking.

"I don't know it's just a hunch. But I want to test it out." Noctis says crossing his arms. "The way he freaked out when Prompto mentioned that he didn't need his book makes it seem like he can't live without it."

"Dude, maybe he can't."

"Doubt it, I bet it more or less has to do with the fact that he doesn't want the burden of rewriting all those recipes all over again. It won't be the same, kinda like writing a story. You pour your heart and soul into those lines and you get really far. Only problem is you forget to save and by some unfortunate circumstance you lose the entire file. Sure you can write it all over again but the original passion and drive just isn't there." Gladiolus says before taking a swallow of beer.

"You speaking from experience, big guy?" Prompto asks curiously.

"You can say that. But all I'm saying is that that's probably what Ignis meant." Gladiolus says.

"Maybe...but, you do remember that he said he had a back up with the same recipes."

"So? That doesn't mean it's filled with the same amount." Gladiolus says.

"Or maybe the second one doesn't really existence. He might've just said that." Prompto says looking over at the older men.

Silence falls over the friends for a brief moment causing Ignis to glance over at them curiously "I still want to test it out." Noctis says finally "I just need to find the right moment."

•••

It was around midnight when Ignis was brought out his slumber with the need to relieve himself. He sat up, not bothering to put on his glasses, pulls on his shoes, and exits the tent after fumbling with the zipper.

Noctis quickly sits up turning on his phone. He used the faint light to search the leather jacket belonging to his advisor. He searched the outer pockets and then the inner ones.

Occasionally he glanced at the open flap expecting to see Ignis. He turns back to the jacket and finds another pocket. A pocket on the inside that rests over Ignis' chest when he wears it's.

He reaches inside and pulls out the book.

He flips through the book quickly smirking when he realizes it's the recipe book. However the moment is short lived when he heard footsteps approaching.

He fixes the jacket and stashed the book in his pants pocket before tossing the blanket over himself pretending to sleep.

Ignis returns and climbs back inside the tent, zips it closed, and lays down unaware that his notebook had been taken.

•••

The next morning after stopping at a diner for breakfast the friends had taken up another hunt, this one in an shared opinion, a rather easy one.

The task was to simply take down three Garula.

The beasts location was extremely close so they left the Regalia in the parking lot.

As they walk Prompto rushes up to Noctis grabbing the prince by the shoulder getting his friends attention "Noct...I don't know about this."

"About the hunt? Garula are easy to kill."

"What? No, Noct! You know what I mean. What if...I don't know, what if he-"

"He'll be fine Prompto."

Noctis motions with his head to the youngest to keep going. Prompto looks over to Ignis who was already crossing the street with Gladiolus at his side. The gunmen glances at Noctis hoping he was right.

Though he couldn't shake the feeling that this will end badly.

"Gladio!" Noctis shouts warping up on to a large rock where he feels a wave of energy wash over him as his magic is restored. He watches as the large man rushes forward swinging his weapon and knocks the beast into a vulnerable state.

Ignis pushes up his glasses and throws a spell killing the last of the Garula.

"Woohoo! What a ride!" Prompto shouts happily high-fiving Gladiolus.

"Yeah!" Gladiolus says smirking.

Noctis didn't join in the banter he was watching Ignis who was now looking at the deceased Garula. He watches as the brunette places his hand on the wooly coat of the creature feeling the animal.

And then he does it.

He steps back snapping his fingers and reaches into his jacket. The action causes Noctis to hold his breath as he continues to watch his advisor reach into his inner pocket and the corners of his mouth suddenly pull downward into a frown as a perplexed expression takes over his features.

"That's odd." He says softly withdrawing his hand, coming up empty handed.

He reaches into his pants pocket but feels nothing. He pats himself down before looking around the grassy field.

"Somethin' the matter?" Gladiolus asks slightly confused at Ignis' actions, he didn't know that Noctis had stolen the journal.

"It appears that I have missed placed my notebook." He responds still searching the grass.

"Maybe you left it in the Regalia." Gladiolus says trying to think of a place that the book could've gone. "Ah, yes. That is another possibility." Ignis says.

His voice and expression betrayed the rapid pounding of his heart and butterflies in his stomach. He would be devastated if he lost his notebook and it wouldn't be because of his recipes.

As the group make their way back the regalia Ignis kept his eyes peeled for the book that could possibly be laying haphazardly in the grass or in the road. Gladiolus also kept his eye out for the book.

"Hey big guy." Noctis says catching up to Gladiolus who turns to face him "What?" He asks sounding distracted "Don't bother with the journal, I have it." Noctis says pulling the lost book out of his pocket but kept it out of view from Ignis.

"Well give it to Iggy."

"I will...but later, I want to know what the big fuss was over the book." Noctis says as he hides the book once more.

"Well don't wait to long." Prompto adds his tone was full of irritation as he looks at Ignis who was still calmly searching, he hated seeing Ignis being tricked like this. He hadn't done anything to warrant this, his only crime was saying that he'd never lose the book.

The walk back to restaurant was a slow and nerve wracking one, for Ignis that is. Ignis didn't have to say a word, his actions of surveying the surrounding area and his brisk movements told the others he was set on finding his notebook.

He continues to search the long paved road, his silent plea of help felt by Gladiolus and Prompto. Despite knowing the real location of the book they aid in the pointless search. Noctis even plays his part of looking for the book occasionally saying things like 'It's not over here' or 'Any luck Specs?' He even asks Gladiolus and Prompto who just sigh in response. However hearing this only causes Ignis to shudder.

When they arrive at the diner Ignis could be seen scanning the perimeter, searching the spot he recalls sitting at. As the prince talks with the tipster Ignis slowly walks around the resturant. Checking the booths and stand alone tables. And when Noctis finished talking with the tipster Ignis steps forward calmly asking if they seen his journal. But he was only met with a shake of the head and a 'We'll keep an eye out for it for ya.'

That had only added to Ignis' fear and anxiety. However he remained stoic and his voice came out strong as he gave a slight bow "You have our thanks." He says straightening only to briskly walk out of the restaurant. His thoughts going to the car as he recalls Gladiolus suggesting it might there.

He opens the driver side door checking under and around the seat. He moves to the passenger side and eventually the back.

The other three watch, two watching helplessly as Ignis througly checks the Regalia hoping that the notebook turns up.

"Noct, you should really give it back." Prompto says in pleading tone.

But Noctis wasn't satisfied. He still couldn't figure out what was so special about this book. Sure he used it for recipes but there had to be more to it, but what?

"Look, why don't you ask why that book is so important?" Gladiolus asks wanting this to be over with. Seeing Ignis tricked like this angered him.

"I did once, he didn't saything." Noctis responds.

"So you think putting him through this will get him say why he's so protective of his journal?" Prompto grumbles crossing his arms.

"That's the plan."

"It's a terrible plan."

They watch as Ignis stands up shaking his head and that's when Noctis saw it, a brief glimmer of frustration on Ignis' features. Noctis wanted to give the book back but he also still didn't feel like he fully knew the importance of this book.

'I'll give it to him later...'

Ignis sighs softly as he pushes up his glasses. His chest hurt a bit at the thought of the journal being lost. He glances at the others briefly thinking that one of them had it but shot down the idea. Sure they had their moments where they would fight and get on each others nerves, but they never took and hid personal favorite items. Ignis swallows down the faint stinging prickling in his throat, knowing that he shouldn't care about a journal when he has job to do. So he straightens his jacket and heads towards the prince.

"Well, shall we be on our way?" Ignis asks once he approached the others, Noctis notices a small barely noticeable change in Ignis' voice but says nothing about it as he nods "Yeah..." Noctis says making his way the Regalia.

•••

They arrive at the camp grounds they had stayed at the previous night due to Ignis saying that it's getting dark and that everything was already set up. Which wasn't a lie, the sun had began to fade and their campsite was still there untouched.

When they exit the Regalia and make their way to the camp Ignis couldn't help but look around the grass. It took everything in him to not rush ahead and tear into the tent.

Instead he looks up at the sky and then to the haven knowing that dinner would have to be made soon. He glances at the grass once more and sighs softly.

Ignis had set up everything he would need for that nights meal, he sets the frying pan on the grill and half heartedly begins to heat it up before tossing the vegetables into it. The pans hisses as smoke rises towards the sky.

The daggersmen kneels down checking the flames under the pot that stood next to the pan. It would be about another minute or two for the rice to finish.

"Uh Ignis."

Ignis glances over his shoulder to see Prompto standing behind him. The older man stands up "Yes, what is it Prompto?" He asks.

Ignis' tone sort of angered Prompto, he sounded like he usually does but that's what was upsetting the blonde. Didn't he care about his journal? However Prompto simply sighs "You need help?"

Ignis shook his head as he added the vegetables to the rice. Prompto watches a bit before continuing "You sure do know how to cook, how can you remember all the recipes without your journal. I mean, how do you know what goes in what and for how long something goes for."

Ignis simply blinks he fluffed the rice a few times before sighing "I don't need the journal for my recipes. Whenever, I make a new meal for the first time I..." Ignis trails off he looks out the vast world before them and shakes his head "Go tell the others the food is ready." Ignis says softly stepping off the haven.

"Where are you going?" Prompto asks watching the other leave "I wish to be alone." Ignis responds making his way to the Regalia.

Prompto sighs as he watches Ignis fot a moment longer before getting Gladiolus and Noctis.

The three eat quietly occasionally looking out to the Regalia where they could see Ignis sitting in the driver seat with his hands and head on the steering wheel.

"Noct, it's not funny anymore, not that it ever was but you seriously need to give Ignis his book back." Prompto says.

"Yeah, you know that it's clearly upsetting him. And you should know better than anyone that he won't tell you that he's distressed. Remember when we were little and you were going through that phase where you would set everything on fire with your fire magic?" Gladiolus says earning a nod from the prince and a confused look from Prompto.

"You remember that creepy doll Ignis had, that had bat ears, a owl beak, and that would speak nonsense. You called that doll 'The bane of your existence' you also called it evil."

"Furbies are evil."

"That doesn't matter, you destroyed it and lied about it. You told Ignis that you let Pryna and Umbra play with it and you didn't know they were going to break it." Gladiolus says "Ignis simply accepted the fact that his favorite toy was gone, what you didn't know was that he was angry, he so upset with you. He told me that he wanted to punch you, he said that he should have never shown you the doll, he just wanted cry. But he couldn't, he had to suck it up and act like everything was fine."

"Wait. Why couldn't Ignis express himself to Noct? Heck for that matter why doesn't he express himself now? I mean for as long as I known him I haven't seen him cry, shout, or anything." Prompto says looking at Noctis and then to Gladiolus.

Gladiolus looks out to the Regalia where he sees Ignis sit up. He looks at Prompto taking a breath "You see, when Ignis was little he had been sent to a school where he was put through intensive training that taught him to have what it takes to be resourceful and have the patience to deal with Noct. I don't exactly know what he's been taught but I hate thinking that shutting up his emotions was one of the lessons." Gladiolus says.

"To shut up his emotions?" Prompto repeats he was about to ask what he meant when he recalls all the times that they would be joking and laughing but Ignis was silent.

Prompto had always assumed it was because Ignis was well, more mature. But he had his moments where he would smile, that meant he was happy right? Then again smiling didn't mean he was truly happy and Prompto knew that for a fact.

He did find it weird that Ignis would often request time alone and he wondered if that's when he would let his emotions show.

"I feel sorry for him. I mean not being able to scream or shout or even laugh...it has to hurt." Prompto says.

Noctis looks confused "Laugh? I heard him laugh."

"Dude that wasn't a hearty laugh. Not to mention he quickly apologizes about laughing." Prompto snaps "And you know it. Ignis is hurting and you'd rather play this mind game with him."

Noctis glares "Is it so wrong to see why he was quick to knock down the idea of him lost the stupid journal?"

"Yeah it is! Especially when it's making Ignis isolate himself!" Growls Prompto. "You don't know the history of that journal."

"Pretty sure he just bought it."

Prompto was growing upset and Gladiolus places a hand on his shoulder "Look, we just don't like seeing him like this. And we know it's hurting you too. We just want this over with quickly. Give him back the journal now." The massive man says entering the tent.

Noctis watches as the two enter the tent before turning to the Regalia. He could see Ignis wiping at his face "I will give him back his journal...I promise."

•••

It was late in the night when Ignis returns from the car. His mind set on finding the book, he had clipped a flashlight to his blazer and searched the entire perimeter of the haven. He retraced his steps from the Regalia to the campsite, being careful to check every nook and cranny.

But like before he turned up nothing.

He returns to the haven thinking that the book was in the tent. But he knew the others were inside which meant searching wasn't an option. So, he settled with putting out the fire on the grill and stored the leftovers. Ignis knew he wouldn't able to sleep comfortably but he had to try.

Ignis was the last one to wake, but once he was up he had the chance to check the tent, only to end up with the same outcome.

Ignis sighs his eyes clouding with unshed tears as he realizes that his journal was gone. He tries to wipe them away but to no avail. He knows that he has to move on, he knows that it's just a stupid book filled dishes he knows by heart and that guiding Noctis is more important.

Ignis looks around the tent his heart feels heavy and his throat begins to tighten as he hesitantly gets into a crouch position. He knows his own selfishness will only hinder the others so he calms himself down and wipes his tears.

He exits the tent, seeing him exit Gladiolus and Prompto look at silently demanding him to give the book back. Noctis glares at them as he stands and makes his way to Ignis who was starting to gather things for breakfast. Noctis awkwardly stands next to him "Good morning." He hears Ignis say in a forced jubilant tone hoping that the prince wouldn't notice his tears.

Noctis just nods before sighing, he notices the tears and it tore at the prince. He hadn't expected to see Ignis like this "Specs, I..." he starts to say causing Ignis to stop doing what he was doing due to how hesitant the prince sounded "Yes, Noct?"

"I uh...I found your journal."

Ignis felt his heart skip a beat as he looks at Noctis with a look he, Noctis, has never seen before on the older mans' face. It was a look of disbelief and sadness, as if he half expected the other to be lying.

Ignis wanted to demand that Noctis give it to him but he refrains from doing so. Noctis, reaches into his cargo pants pocket and removed the book holding it out to the other "It was wedge in between the energy stones he says gesturing to the stones crackling with lightening "It must've fell when we-"

"It matters not, all that matters is that it's back. Thank you Noct." Ignis says cutting him off. He didn't care where it was he was just overjoyed to have it back. He held the book staring at it before opening it, Noctis steps up next to him seeing that Ignis had opened a small fold in the back of the journal that he didn't know was there. He watched as Ignis pulls out a photo.

"You must think I'm mad for frantically looking a drab old journal with recipes in it. The truth is...I could careless for the notes written in this...but the journal itself...it means so much to me." Ignis hands Noctis the photo so he could see it.

The photo was of Mr. Scientia, his uncle with a much younger Ignis on his shoulders holding a stuffed moogle with a blue nose. It looks like their at a carnival and Ignis had his face painted as a certain yellow electric mouse. The two look genuinely happy.

"Look at you." Noctis says smiling.

Ignis simply nods as he's handed back the picture. "That same day, he had given me this journal. He...wrote this recipe." He says showing him a chocolate chiffon cake recipe "It's the first thing I ever learned to make." Ignis' voice quakes as he sniffs "The day before we left he had given me this..." He says fishing out an envelope, he hands it to Noctis who opens it taking a folded sheet of paper.

To my sweet nephew,

I'm so proud of you and all that you have and will accomplish. You have grown up to be a great young man. The road that waits before you will be a difficult one and I know that the dangers that wait for you will be scary, but don't forget you're not alone. You have Gladiolus and Noctis with you and they will stand at your side even in the darkest of times. Now I know you have a tendency to be stubborn, and that's okay, but you must remember that the other two will have opinions of their own and you must take that into account.

Also don't forget that they are there to help you. You may be the advisor to Noctis and that you are incredibly smart but that doesn't mean you know everything. You're going to need to listen to your friends and trust their word. You must trust that they care about you and whatever they say or do towards you is because they care about you.

Ignis, the time we had together in all honesty seemed like a long time, but in reality it was short. Seeing you stand before the king amongst your friends. It breaks my heart because to me you're still that little boy who would stay up watching cartoons, who would build fortresses out of pillows, who would cry when he tripped on his shadow. To me you're still the little boy who would tantrums when I would tease you, who slept with a nightlight after watching Grimlins.

I don't see a grown man proud and strong standing before the king, I see a little boy. And as cruel as that sounds that's all I ever seen you as and it's probably because I don't want want you to grow up and face that cruel world.

But I know I must let you go.

And it hurts.

But today I must let you go. And as I watch you walk down those steps and I frantically scribble this down I want you to know that you're the best thing that has ever happen to me. From the moment I held you I couldn't help but think 'I'm the luckiest man alive'.

Ignis, I'm proud of you. I love you my son.

- Your uncle

Noctis finishes the letter and looks over at Ignis, he wipes at his eyes as tears roll down his cheeks "I'm sorry...I didn't know...had I then I-" Noctis says, as rubs the others back. He was going to admit to stealing the book but Ignis cut him off "N-No it's quite alright...I shouldn't...I have..." Ignis feels his words become choked off as he tries to explain the tears and his odd behavior but Noctis only rolls his eyes pulling him closer. The older male tears off his glasses before burying his face in the crook of Noctis' neck as tears brim in his eyes.

"I know what you mean, this book is all you have left" he says gently "like my dads' Regalia, this book is what keeps your memory of your uncle alive." Noctis says, he feels Ignis shudder against his shoulder as he tightly grips the back of the princes' jacket. His knuckles turn white as his tears stain Noctis' shirt.

Noctis wraps his arms around Ignis as his cries heightened.

Gladiolus and Prompto, who were sitting in the camp chairs had made their way over seeing that Ignis was letting out heartbreaking sobs.

"So you finally got your book back? Must be really important to you for it to make you cry." Gladiolus says crossing his arms eyeing Noctis.

"I'm just glad he has it back." Prompto says placing a hand on Ignis' back "Just happy to know you're happy Ig." He adds.

Ignis was indeed happy, but that wasn't the word he would have used because he swirling storm of emotions that one emotion alone to describe all that he felt wouldn't justify it.

When his tears finally stopped and he was finally able breathe without gasping or hiccuping he pulls away from Noctis. He takes out a handkerchief wiping at his eyes and nose.

He gives his friends a watery smile "Apologies...I...I'm just exuberant. I thought I would never see this again." He says.

"Well, just be more careful next time." Gladiolus says smiling wrapping an arm around Ignis' shoulders and ruffling his hair.

"Duly noted." Ignis says tucking his journal away.

Noctis nods stepping off the haven "Well shall we go?"

With a round of various 'yes' the group heads to the Regalia.


This was also on my account on AO3 (Archive of Our Own)