This is based on The Burrito episode. I just hated Tahani's parents and Judge Gen (or Jen, depending) was so falling for Tahani, I wanted to give Tahani's 'rents the what for.

This is a one-shot...and I am happy to make the deadline of before the West Coast season finale. I still ship Eleanor and Tahani/Chidi, but I think that Tahani/Gen/Jen would work

Let me know if you like this. And with words, not just likes and kudos. The usual disclaimers, outside of a bit of swearing. Enjoy...

Waquas and Manisha Al-Jamil let out a big sigh of relief after the door closed. After all, having your daughter practically tell you off was no fun at all. And it wasn't as if they didn't love Tahani. They did...to a point. It was just that she wasn't Kamillah. Lack of poise, too tall, too gangly. Tahani was too rebellious. The girl shagged a Floridian for God's sake. She even munched on a non-organic Cheeto...and she loved it it! It was a thankful thing she left when she did. Saved them the trouble of disowning the street rat.

Suddenly the doorbell to the apartment rang. The Al-Jamils had lived in the apartment since the day they passed on. They were still awaiting word on their final judgment, so they never really had a lot of company. Now to visitors in the same day. There was Tahani, and now whoever this is. Waquas got up from his seat and answers the door. Standing in the doorway was this 40-something woman of apparently mixed ancestry wearing a judge's robe. Both Waquas and Manisha figured that it was the judge that was looking at their case who had come to give them her final verdict.

They had no idea how like they were..

"My name's Gen. I'm the Eternal Judge. I'm here to see both of you. May I come in?" She was in her robe...and she was not smiling.

Waquas invited Judge Gen into the apartment. When she entered, Gen gracefully waved her arms gracefully as if she was casting a spell of sorts. Manisha invited Judge to sit down, but Gen said no. "What I did was temporarily remove the language filters from this room. It will make it easier for me to express why I came here, and since I have judgements that are waiting, I'll make this brief." Then Gen closed her eyes, took a deep breath and made her pronouncement...

"You are both going to The Bad Place. The real one."

The Al-Jamils had a look of morbid shock at the statement. Manisha asked why.

"Well,let me see..." The Judge did some faux pondering, then answered the woman's question: "Maybe it's because,as parents, you are both rancid pieces of rotting shit!"

Waquas stood up in great anger."How dare walk into room and and question our ability to raise our daughters!"

"Because I CAN, Mr. Al-Jamil!" The last time Gen was this blazing angry after Princess Diana was killed (she always called it murder). "You called Tahani a failure. Considering what all she has done to raise money for people all over the world. Maybe she did it to get your attention, but she saved lives...lives!

"Please don't get us wrong, Your Honor. We do love Tahani, we truly do, but if you want us to be honest, Kamillah is much more talented..."

"All your other daughter has done caterwaul through an auto-tune," Gen replied with considerable acid in her voice.

The anger was also rising inside of Tahani's father, responding in highly measured tones: "I want an apology right now! If you feel that way about my darling Kamillah, please explain how she was entered into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame!"

Tahani's mother: "Not to mention that Kamillah is a young lady of very high morals and standards. Tahani, however, felt the need eat junk food and have sex with someone from...Orlando!"

"Actually, the city is Jacksonville, named after the seventh President of the United States, you may want to know." Gen was now beyond dealing with this pair's bullshit right then. "As for your daughter's....talents...let's see what the darling Kamillah was doing right now.

With a wave of two arms, a curved screen appeared. And on it was a woman who was definitely Kamillah. That woman was also definitely helping a rather hefty older woman ministrate orally to an even heftier older man laid out on a bed. "I think you recognize the two other people as the heads of your sweet, innocent daughter's record label," said the Judge with a very evil smirk. "Oh, and what do we have here...," Gen pointed out as a white box emerged during the proceedings, a white powder poured out on the large man's belly and the two women heartily inhaled said powder."

Then another wave of the hand and the screen disappeared. The Al-Jamils sat stone-faced. The judge made her point.

"You know, you won't be going to the real Bad Place. You'll be here, in this nice apartment for eternity. Oh, and if you try to leave..." Gen got up and the door to nothing but fire reaching up from a truly bottomless pit. Then the judge closed.

The two Al-Jamils were stunned speechless. But the judge had one more surprise. "Don't worry, I am not that cruel, I'm going to leave you with some...sustenance..." And with that, Gen waved her hand and down came dozens and dozens of Party Size bags of Cheetos. The Flaming Hot variety.

"Enjoy." was Judge Gen's final word to the two poor excuses for parents as they sat transfixed with bags ultra-spicy cheese puffs continued to run down. With that, Gen closed the door with finality.

And when the door closed, Gen closed her eyes, trying to fight back salty tears that were forming. An Eternal Judge is not supposed to let feelings interfere with her decisions, but she had fallen for all four highly imperfect humans. Gen was supposed to send all four to damnation, but she couldn't know what she knows. Especially Tahani, she Gen had fallen for. She had made a determination that no matter what,none of our would suffer not one day on eternity. She knew she had to stall for time: Michael would eventually show up with his Janet from 12358W. Between them, there might be an answer. She just knew that she could not hurt the humans.

And she sure as hell could not hurt Tahani.

And as Judge Gen reached the red door to her quarters, she prayed for a miracle to save them..especially that tall British angel, Tahani.

The judge lived in a place where miracles were commonplace. Gen needed a big one. Now.

THE END