A/N: Just an idea I had, if this gets good feedback, I'll continue, if not, I'll scrap it. XD First Hetlia Multi fic, so don't expect super duper awesome skills of epicness. :D
Gilbert: BUT EXPECT SOME AWESOMENESS! D:
Summary: Sick of Francis' ways of showing 'love' to the other nations, Matthew convinces him to stop, and suprisingly, he agrees...but only if Matt takes his place. So now Canada must act excatly the same way France does in order for the Frenchman to keep his hands to himself. Counter Productive...and how excatly does this work when the Canadian tries to talk to his crush, Hungary?
"You know what, France, I'm sick of you molesting everyone, it's not nice!" Sputtered a blushing Matthew Williams as his cousin continued to fondle him.
The human representation of the United States of America, Alfred F. Jones, laughed boisterously, "Aw snap, Mattie used your country name, Francis! I think he means it."
"Ah, non, petit Mathieu does not know what he is talking about. He is just confused." Said France, or Francis Bonnefoy with a grin.
"Tabarnak, arrêté!" Shouted Matthew as he pushed the offender away.
Surprised, Francis let go, and stared at the young blonde, whose violet eyes were downcast, staring at the ground.
"Sorry, I just wanted you to stop." Said Matthew quietly.
"Je suis desolé aussi." Sighed Francis.
Alfred stared at the two with a blank expression, "The awkward moment when you're all speaking French and I'm standing here, not understanding anything!" He pouted.
At that moment, Arthur Kirkland walked into the room, "Bloody hell, what is with all the yelling?" He asked, obviously annoyed.
Francis grinned as he inched toward the Brit, "Ah, Angleterre, how have you been?"
Arthur took a few steps back, "Stay away, Frog!" He cursed.
Before Francis could get any closer, Matthew slipped between them holding his hands in front of him to act as a barrier.
"France, stop." He said quietly, but firmly.
"Quoi?" Frowned the Frenchman.
"You honestly can't go a single day without groping someone, can you?" Muttered Matthew as he pushed his slipping glasses back into his face.
"Ah, Mathieu, you cannot change the nature of the beast."
"And besides," cut in Alfred, "When's the last time you've had a girlfriend, Mattie?" Teased America.
Matthew Williams, Canada, glared at his brother with all the rage he could muster, but being a passive country, it wasn't that much.
"I bet I could get one without being as touchy as Francis." Huffed the Canadian.
"How about this," Started France, "Mathieu and I will change places."
"Who?" Interjected Arthur, already forgetting the name of the country that saved him from France's grabby hands.
"I will be more…gentlemanly, but you," He pointed at Canada, "You must do what I do."
Matthew paled, "You mean…"
"Oui." Smirked France.
America's bright blue eyes grew even brighter as he understood, "Mattie's gotta be a player! Or a serial rapist, depending on how you look at it." He laughed.
"Ah yes, I will no longer show my fellow nations all my l'amour, and has Canada says, "Stop molesting them", but only as long as he takes my place. You," he pointed at Matthew again, "It is your turn to show them l'amour."
"Non. I mean, no. No deal, Francis!" Grunted the Blonde.
The Frenchman shrugged, "Then do not complain, Mathieu. And now we must go, I believe it is time for our world conference meeting." With a toss of his hair, Francis Bonnefoy left.
"Aw man, I hate these meetings, they're so boring!" Whined Alfred.
"C'mon lads, he's right, we'll be late." Said Arthur as he led the North Americans out the door and toward the main conference room.
As they walked, Matthew mentally cursed himself, he let Francis get the better of him. The Canadian was a kind hearted person, there was no way he would agree to harass the other nations the way that France did, but the thought of a decent, non-raping Francis sounded absolutely fantastic. The three new comers took their seats in the conference room, just making it on time. Francis was already there, chatting up a nervous looking Kiku Honda, the representation of Japan. Scoffing, Matthew zoned out, hoping the meeting would end soon. As he began drifting to sleep, someone dropped a huge weight on his chest. Sputtering for air, the Canadian pushed at the weight, only to see that it wasn't a weight at all, it was Ivan Braginski of Russia.
"I-Ivan," Sputtered Matthew as he started to turn red from lack of oxygen, "G-g-get off me!"
The giant of a Russian looked around for a moment before rubbing his ear; he hadn't noticed he was sitting on the smaller nation.
As Matthew started to feel faint, he could hear someone shout out, "Russia, get the off of the poor kid!"
Ivan stood up and looked down to see a panting Canada, gasping for air. How he had not seen him was beyond Matthew's comprehension, he was the second largest country in the world for maple's sake! And as such, being the human representation, he stood at a good 6'1…which still had nothing on Ivan's 6'8, and a small handful of other nations, but c'mon!
"Ah, little Matvey, I did not see you there." Said the Russian genuinely.
"It's ok," Panted Matthew, "I can move if you want." His Canadian manners kicked into play here.
"Nyet, do not strain yourself, I will go take another seat." Smiling, Russia stood another seat next to Alfred, who was muttering something about dang Commies.
The meeting started with Ludwig of Germany declaring something about the environment as everyone else, save the more serious nations, started talking amongst themselves. Matthew wished he had his deck of hockey cards or something to pass the time with. Or at least his polar bear, what was his name? Kumajuro? Kurijimaro? Never mind, it didn't matter, these meetings were a joke, the nations never actually got anything done. From the corner of his eye, he could see Francis now talking to Hungary, who Matthew would never admit, he had a crush on.
"France, stop." Hissed Elizabeta.
"Mais, ma cherie…" Purred Francis as he moved closer.
Hungary blushed, but it was an angry indignant one, as she pulled out a frying pan, seemly out of nowhere, and smacked Francis on the head with it.
Matthew watched this unfold with a feeling of satisfaction, In your face, Bonnefoy.
But his victory was short lived as an undeterred Francis simply smiled and ran a hand through Elizabeta's brown hair, murmuring something about how he liked him feisty.
Matt had enough, he quickly stood, "France, I accept your deal! Now stop raping Hungary!"
The furious blonde was ignored by most of the other nations, but America, England, Hungary, France, and even the ex-nation Prussia heard his "yell", which was only about as loud as America's talking voice.
Francis raised an eyebrow, "Fantastique! Come, Mathieu, we shall discuss the terms and guidelines of our bet."
The two blondes left the room, leaving a face palming England, an amused Alfred, smirking Prussia, and confused Elizabeta….along with a good twenty other nations, oblivious to what had just happened.