Disclaimer: Not mine. This parodies the scene where V performs his speech for Evey.

Edit on 08/23 - props to anomin1979 for the word "vixen" :)

"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition! The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and...hmm...ah, veracity of such shall one day vindicate the, uh, virile! and the...er...damn! I can't think of anything else."

Oscar popped his head out of the nearby garbage can.

"Obviously, today's movie is brought to you by the letter V. If you're looking for new words – there is such a thing called a dictionary, you know – and yes, I realize you've probably never heard of it, because it doesn't start with V, which you apparently have a fetish for - but it does exist, and it's very useful."

V brandished a knife threateningly. "Listen, I don't have time for this. I'm trying to finish an impressive speech here. A word, please?"

Oscar sighed. "How about 'vigilant' or 'virtuous'?"

"Ah, very viable words, thank you. So, where was I? Ah yes – 'The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous!'" He took a breath. "So, what did you think?"

Evey, by this point, was very freaked out. "Are you, like, a crazy person?"

"I am quite sure they will say so." He bowed and offered her his hand. "Are you hurt?"

Evey wasn't hurt, but also wasn't about to stick around and take her chances with this insane man, who apparently wore creepy-looking masks, used the letter V much too often, and spoke to strange creatures who lived in garbage cans. Luckily, she had an escape plan.

Grabbing the proffered hand, she propelled herself upward quickly off the ground, used the other hand to spray most of the can of Mace right into the eyes of his mask, and ran as fast as she could in heels down the alley and back to her apartment.

V was down for the count, eyes burning as he writhed around on the ground, cursing. "Why you vile, vacuous - vixen! You...ahh!" groaning in frustration as he again ran out of words.

Oscar rose from his hiding spot in the trash. "Well, you're not getting anymore help from me."