The 15 Things

By: kyohei11sunako

What are the 15 qualities Yuka looks for in a son-in-law?

1. Polite

He smiled.
Yuka raised a brow.
''You know too well what I'm feeling, young boy.''
''Yes. You're having your menstruation.''

2. Caring

The old woman found a crumpled letter on Mikan's desk.
'Good luck with your diet.'
-Natsume
''That brat! Is he trying to make my daughter look skinny?''

3. Gentle

''Relax. I'll put it inside you slowly. Yes, that's it!''
Outside the room, Yuka's having a nosebleed.
''What the hell are they doing in that room?''

4. Smart

He smirked. Yuka gasped.
Youichi frowned.
''Natsume-nii, how am I supposed to write 'inserting the penis into vagina' with this short space? The only option is male and female.''

5. Brave

''I saw that old man hugging Mikan. He's harassing her.''
Yuka punched Natsume square on face.
''Brat! That is Mikan's father!''

6. Honest

''What do you think brat?''
Yuka twirled around in her red dress.
Natsume frowned, putting his thumb and index finger on his chin.
''Hmm. It doesn't suit you at all. You look old at that dress. And your heels, it-''
Mikan smacked him on the head.
''What? You asked me to say the truth!''

7. Joker

''So, what do you call a snail in a ship?''
''What?''
''A Snailor.''
He laughed. Yuka glared at him.
''You know, young man, I can always kick your ass out this house.''
He stopped laughing.
''That's a good joke.''
''I'm damn serious.''

8. Keen

''Well, I could say that your house is pretty good, young man, and full of my daughter's pictures.''
Natsume smirked. Yuka opened the drawer.
''Why the hell is Mikan's underwear here?''

9. Cautious

''So just to assure your safety...''
Yuka smiled outside the door.
''...let's use condoms and pills.''
And she literally kicked the door only to see her daughter being straddled by the young man.
And, his butt too.

10. Selfless

''That's a good chocolate cake. Let me share it with you.''
And he kissed her.
Yuka snapped.
''Young man, stop kissing our daughter in front of us!''

11. Diligent

''Young man.''

''Yes?''
''Are you desperate enough to visit my daughter 10 hours a day, 7 days a week?''
''Yes.''
''Go to hell.''
''Now or later?''

12. Generous

''Are you willing to give everything to her? Your house, your life, your whole properties?''
He smirked.
''Of course. I'll be more than willing to share my sperms with her.''
''What the?''
''It's my property, anyway.''

13. Supportive

''That's it Youichi! Kick him! Yes! Punch his face! There!''
Natsume smirked. Yuka's jaw dropped.
''You brat! Stop pursuing my son to hurt others!''

14. Talented

''Kimigayo wa
Chiyo ni yachiyo ni
Sazareishi no
Iwao to narite
Koke no musu made...''
Yuka, for the first time, smiled.
''That's really great! I didn't know that you're good at reciting poems!''
''Mrs. Sakura-''
''And heartwarming too, though it seems familiar.''
''Mrs. Sakura!''
''What?''
''I really appreciate your nice comments. But please try to distinguish the difference between singing and reciting a poem.''

15. Patient

The door broke. Yuka gasped. Natsume's eyes widened.
''Why the hell are you here at my house, wearing a tuxedo this 10 in the morning?''
''Where's Mikan? Is she already in the church? What about the visitors?''
''For goodness' sake, Natsume! Your wedding is tomorrow!''

''Mom?''
''Yes dear?''
''You're thinking of Natsume again, aren't you?''
'Damn, she found out.'
---

A/N: Huh. Another oneshot. Hehe. Anyway, to those who are complaining for updating my story sooooo late, well, I'm sorry. I'm a lazy bum. True. But I will never ever dump my works. I'll update it monthly. Just kidding.

I can't believe I actually wrote this. Well, I was inspired by Shrek's movie. There was a commercial back then on how to impress your in-laws. This was supposed to be "how to impress your mother-in-law" but it's already common, so yeah. Thanks again.

Just for the notes, (number 7), are you familiar at the joke? Well, try to watch one of the episodes in spongebob, entitled 'dumped'. And for number 3, Youichi was asking Natsume about the definition of sex. Let's just pretend that Youichi still doesn't know that he's in male group.

Thank you.

-kyohei11sunako