Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Archive Warning: Major Character Death
Category: M/M
Fandom: Batman - All Media Types
Relationship: Tim Drake/Jason Todd
Characters: Tim Drake, Jason Todd
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Alternate Universe - Apocalypse, Blood and Injury, Fluff and Angst
Summary: Jason and Tim are dying but Jason has a plan.
Notes: I know I've got a ton of other stuff to be working on but here's this. Enjoy. Yes, I stole the Artemis Hotel's name. I'm sure they have something like it in Gotham.
Part One
There was so much fucking blood.
"Hey baby."
How could so much blood fit in such a small body?
"It's gonna be okay."
It stained the concrete and filled the air with the smell of metal and salt.
"Look at me."
There had to be a way to fix this and put all that blood back where it needed to be.
"I'm gonna get us out of here."
They had nowhere to go and no one to help them.
"Just hang on a little while longer."
They needed more time to figure things out.
"I have an idea."
His body was limp and lifeless as a ragdoll when he was lifted.
"Don't give up on us yet."
The energy was draining from Jason almost as fast as the blood was draining from Tim. Always have a plan; that's what Batman taught them. Well, Jason did. A backup in case the worst happened. A little piece of insurance. He got two steps out of the blood puddle before his knees gave out. Jason went down hard, Tim still secured in his arms. He took a device out of his pocket, a small thing that didn't look nearly as powerful as it was.
He would only get one shot at this. Jason thought he would have used it by now but it never seemed like the right time. Now, he had no choice. Not if they wanted to live. If they died now there wasn't going to be any miraculous revival. Jason entered the date. His fingers left bloody prints all over the device. It wasn't his blood. He almost wished it was.
He buried his face in Tim's hair. It was damp and smelled like the blood that spiked it. "This is going to fix everything, baby bird." Jason pushed the button.
Robin always listened to his instincts. They screamed at him right now, told him to stop in this alley. He glanced at Batman's retreating form - already grappling away - and stopped on the rooftop. His sharp eyes swept the alley, domino giving him perfect night vision. There was no one there. Nothing out of the ordinary but -
They appeared from nowhere and brought the strong stink of blood with them. Robin couldn't stop the intake of breath. He had seen a lot of things since Batman took him in but never people appearing out of thin air. He crouched and watched, waiting to see what happened.
The bigger figure, the one kneeling, looked around. He wore a shiny red helmet that reminded Robin of something though he couldn't put his finger on it. In his arms was a smaller figure that didn't move. The small one wore a cowl that looked a lot like Batman's cowl.
Were they friends? Batman had a lot of connections and Robin was still learning them. Maybe he should call Batman to come investigate.
"Robin!" The figure on the ground lifted his head and seemed to pick him out on the rooftop.
Robin jumped like a startled cat. He crouched lower on the rooftop, only his eyes poking over the edge.
"Get down here!" He sounded angry but Robin knew that anger was commonly used to cover up fear. The figure hadn't made any move to get up.
"Hood." Robin barely heard the soft voice and it took him a second to realize it was coming from the one being held. "Don't...scare...him." It sounded like every breath was painful. The figure sat up, gasped in pain. He held out his hand. Even from high above Robin could see that it was shaking. "Come here...Little Wing…" Though it was still soft, the man's voice had turned sweet as honey.
Dick called him Little Wing. They clearly knew something and they didn't seem like trouble. Robin was sure that they were both injured somehow since they hadn't moved from the spot they'd appeared in. He could probably just dance out of their way if they tried to attack him. After all, Robin wasn't some ordinary boy. He was, well, Robin. He jumped down before he'd decided that he was going to.
On the ground the smell of blood made him gag. It was so strong! He covered his nose and mouth with his hand. Robin stepped closer, careful to stay out of lunging distance. They could be faking. But Robin didn't feel like they were faking. "Who are you?"
Several heartbeats went past. They were both staring at him like they were looking at a ghost. Then the smaller man smiled. His teeth were red with blood. "Robin," he whispered in a tone that held an uncomfortable about of longing and awe.
The bigger one shook himself like a dog shaking off fleas. "We need help." He glanced down at the smaller man. " He needs help. No doctors. No ambulances. No Batman."
Robin nodded, suddenly unsure. Maybe he shouldn't have come down here. He backed up a step.
The smaller man's hand came up and squeezed the material of the brown bomber jacket. "Jay, you're...scaring him."
"He's not scaring me!"
"I'm not scaring me!"
Robin's eyes widened. "What did you just say?"
The man with the red helmet stood up. He reached behind him and there was a soft click then the hiss of air decompressing. He pulled the helmet off. His hair was ginger but there were black tips, meaning that once he'd dyed it but it had been a while. His eyes were blue with flecks of green in them. "I said that I'm you." He swayed on his feet. His eyes narrowed. "How old are you?"
Robin knew that face. Or, he sort of did. The man's face was harder and straighter and all traces of baby fat were gone. He had the scruff from a beard and a lot of shiny scars on his face. But Robin still knew it. Because it was the one he looked into every morning. Those were his eyes, that was his nose (although more crooked). "Fourteen. Almost fifteen."
The man took a deep, slow breath. "If you want to live then you'll help us."
The man on the ground threw out an arm. "Idiot. Still...scaring...him."
"Well he should be scared! He's going to die in a few months!"
"Jay."
The two men shared a long look. They seemed to be communicating without saying a word.
Robin looked between them. They were strange, yes, and vaguely threatening. His instinct told him that if he left them there, they would both be dead within the hour. And for some reason Robin didn't want that. "I know a place we can go. A hotel."
They didn't ask him what hotel. The bigger man scooped up the smaller one. His arms shook but he didn't drop him. "You still got your membership?"
Robin led the way, keeping a careful eye on them as they made slow progress down the sidewalk. They were leaving a very heavy and very obvious trail of blood. "Yes," he answered. He darted forward to keep an eye out, to make sure the path was clear. But his gaze kept being drawn back over his shoulder. Was that really him? He looked...tired. Worn out. He looked vicious, like he was waiting for a fight but like it was the last thing that he wanted. Was this what Robin would become?
He wanted to know all of the details but first he had to make sure they didn't die. His older self didn't appear to have any major wounds but there was still something wrong with him. Robin took them a few blocks down to the Artemis Hotel.
They checked into the hotel without problems, got a room on the ground floor because Jason was pale as a ghost and shiny with sweat and Tim was just unearthly pale. The trail of blood he left behind was significantly reduced to only a few drops. Robin wasn't naive enough to think that that was a good thing. What had he been called? Hood? Jay? Jay set the other man on the gurney in the room and collapsed into a chair nearby. He held tight onto the man's hand.
Robin hovered while nurses and doctors swarmed the man on the gurney. He tried to stay out of the way, ended up perched on the edge of Jay's chair. He tugged on a nurse's arm, jerked his chin in Jay's direction. "He needs help too. He's been poisoned."
Jay didn't react when they poked a needle into his arm to draw blood. His head lolled back and his eyes closed and he took carefully measured breaths. While they were waiting on the results of his bloodwork and the doctors were occupied with the other man, Jay opened his eyes. "Robin, you need to leave him. If you stay with Batman, you'll die."
Robin swallowed. He knew Jay wasn't looking at him. "Is that what happened to you?"
"The Joker lured me to a warehouse in another country by using my birth mom. When I was there he got the drop on me. Tied me up and beat me with a crowbar. I…" Jay stopped, voice breaking. The look on his face was one of sheer agony. "When he was done with me he left and he set off a bomb. Mom was killed instantly but I...I dragged myself to the door." His voice took on a distant quality. His lips quirked like someone had told a joke. "But the door was fucking locked. I suffocated. The smoke killed me before my wounds did."
Jay put his free hand over his eyes. "I don't remember most of that. I was brain dead from the beating...relying on instinct to get out. B pieced it together. I read it in the report later."
Robin wanted to cry. His hands shook. He refused to let a single tear fall. "Where was B?"
"Busy with something else. Didn't get to me in time. I heard he pulled my body from the wreckage." Jay's voice was a little stronger now. The momentary weakness had been buried and snuffed out. He looked down at the hand he was holding. "You have no idea who he is, do you?"
Batman just let him die. Batman didn't come for him. Robin's throat swelled closed with emotion. Why didn't Batman rescue him? Belatedly he realized that Jay had asked him a question. Robin shook his head.
"His name is Tim Drake. After I died, this little bird became the new Robin. He's my replacement. Now he goes by Red Robin." There was no bitterness in Jay's voice. Instead he sounded fond. How could Jay be fond of the person who replaced him? "I tried to kill him a few times. I thought I hated him but...what I really hated was that Batman never got revenge for me. He didn't kill Joker. So I took out all my anger and betrayal on Red."
Disgust and fury and denial swam up in Robin and hit him like a wave. "I would kill for him!" He half shouted.
A few nurses glanced over at him but most of them were too busy trying to save Red's life.
"D-doesn't he love me?" Robin whispered, uncertain. He loved being Robin and he loved hanging out with Batman but he had a hard time believing everything that the Bat promised. Hanging out with Dick didn't really help Robin believe that Bruce loved him. He just wanted…
Jay grit his teeth and looked away. That was answer enough.
"Why would he pretend?"
"B isn't interested in having a family. He wants soldiers." Jay's words stung but there wasn't a hint of lie in his voice. His teal eyes were alight with rage. This was still something that hurt him, Robin realized.
Robin drew his leg up to hug to his chest. He whispered, "I don't want to live on the streets again."
Jay smacked himself on the forehead. He grinned and pulled out a cell phone. "Here," he handed it to Robin. "It's got the account information on all the big baddies in Gotham. All you gotta do is drain their accounts."
Robin carefully put the phone in his utility belt. Batman had taught him something about hacking and he would figure out the rest. It couldn't be too hard. He thought about a life without Batman, without anyone . It scared him. Robin didn't like to be alone. He tried to imagine what Jay was talking about then tried to imagine a life without any adults looking after him.
The doctors and nurses cleared away from Red after an hour. The head doctor shook his head at Jay. "We've done our best but he won't survive until dawn."
Jay's skin shone with sweat. Blood still clung to his hands. At the doctor's words he nodded. There was no surprise in his expression. He knew that Red was going to die.
A new nurse entered the room and handed the doctor a note. He glanced at it and frowned. "Whatever you've got in your system is killing you just as fast. It will take a while to make up an antidote and there's no guarantee that we'll be able to save you in time."
"Don't bother," Jay squeezed Red's hand. "When he goes, I do too."
This wasn't the type of hospital where doctors questioned comments like that. He let it go with a nod and a promise to get them moved to somewhere more comfortable. It took several people to move Red and Jay to a new room that didn't reek of blood. This room had a single bed and an armchair. Red was moved into the bed, propped up with pillows.
Jay crawled in after him. He stretched out beside Red, pressed as close as he could get.
Robin had followed them, because he needed to know more about these people who weren't going to last the night. He perched on the armchair, feeling out of place yet unable to leave.
Red didn't move until all the doctors were out of the room. He shifted, hissing out in pain, until he was partially laying on Jay. His eyelids fluttered.
Jay gathered Red into his arms. He held him tight, stroked his hair gently. "Hey, baby bird."
Red's lips twitched in a smile. "Hey, jaybird."
Robin couldn't tear his eyes away even though he felt like he was intruding. They were so intimate together, so clearly in love.
Red turned his face to Robin. "C'mere, Little Wing." He lifted a finger to coax Robin closer.
Robin glanced at his older self before walking around the bed and climbing onto Red's side. He kept his distance but Red motioned him closer again. They didn't seem like the kind of people to have some gross kid fetish but Robin was still wary.
"Gonna hug you. Don't freak out." Every word Red spoke was careful, measured. He slowly raised one arm, gave Robin a pleading look. His eyes were wet with tears.
Robin barely hesitated. He tucked himself against Red's side, gingerly, careful of the wounds the doctors had tried and failed to fix. It took a moment for Robin to realize that his hair was getting wet and that Red was crying on him.
"I wish I could watch you grow up," Red whispered. "I love you so much." He nuzzled his wet cheek into Robin's hair and sighed. "Watching you fly was the only good thing in my life."
Jay made a noise like a distressed animal. He held Red tighter.
Robin wondered how they'd gotten so lucky as to get a man like this. Red sounded so damn sincere that it made Robin's heart hurt. He didn't say anything. Just let himself be held and hoped that that would be enough.
Jay was the one who broke the silence. "I told him to leave Bruce."
Neither of them missed the way Red stiffened. "Is he going to? Are you going to?"
Robin nodded. He pulled back so that he could look at Red's face. There was something about his voice that Robin didn't like. "Jay gave me a way to get money." A better way than what they'd been doing before Bruce found them.
"You have to go get Tim! Don't leave without him, please." Red surged forward and grabbed Robin by the arm. His grip was tight, his eyes bright with fever. "Go get him and bring him back here. I need to talk to him. And if you don't, if you disappear without him, then he'll go to Bruce and take your place." Red fell backwards against the bed with a groan of pain.
Before Red said something, it hadn't occurred to Robin that there was a past version of Tim Drake too. It made perfect sense, though. He was the past version of Jason Todd so of course there would have to be a past version of Tim too. Robin looked at the way Jay held Red, at the way Red's pain seemed to ease while Jay was near him. He thought about how they talked to each other, how they'd come to him. He knew himself well enough to know that if Jay thought this person was worth protecting in the future then he would be worth protecting in the past. Robin stood up off the bed. "Tell me where he is. I'll go get him."
Tim Drake would recognize Robin anywhere but he still jumped when he saw the boy standing in his kitchen. It was such a domestic setting to see Robin in the white linoleum kitchen. He was at odds with the humming of the refrigerator and the LEDs of the electronic appliances. There was blood on Robin's uniform. Tim didn't move from the entryway. His hand tightened around the empty cup in his hand. "Are you hurt, Robin?"
Robin's eyes were wide behind the domino. He stared at Tim like he was seeing something else in his stead.
Tim cocked his head to the side. "Robin?" His grip on the glass tightened. If he had to use it against Robin it would only buy him a few moments. He was already plotting out his escape route should Robin attack him. He hoped Robin wouldn't attack him.
Robin visibly shook himself off. "You're Tim Drake?"
Tim nodded. He cocked his head the other way as though that would help him better understand. He was fairly certain that Robin hadn't blinked yet. "Are you hurt?"
Robin looked down at his uniform and seemed to notice the blood for the first time. "Oh. No. It's not mine." He lifted his gaze and stared at Tim again in that unnerving way. "I need you to come with me."
The conversation was not putting Tim at ease. Had Batman and Robin finally caught on to the fact that Tim was photographing them nearly every night? He uneasily thought about his camera upstairs, all the photos still on the memory card. Tim would never risk putting it on his computer. "Where are we going?"
Robin shifted his weight, nervous. "If I told you the truth I don't think you'd believe me."
Tim stepped into the kitchen and set the glass down. This put him closer to Robin but it also put him closer to the knife block. He put his hand on his hip. "Try me."
"I found our future selves in an alley and they're at the Artemis Hotel dying." Robin cut himself off. There was clearly more to the story but it seemed like Robin was keeping the details to himself for now. "You, um, Red wants to see you. They aren't going to make it till dawn."
Tim didn't have a reason not to trust Robin. He'd spent a lot of time following Robin around and the one thing that Robin wasn't was a liar. Tim thought over the possibilities of time travel and decided that that was believable enough. "Am I coming back?"
Robin bit his lip. He shuffled his feet. All of the confidence he usually had seemed subdued. He was uncertain. "Probably not."
It was Tim's turn to bite his lip. He looked around his kitchen then at Robin again; a colorful yet dark stain amongst sterile white. Tim had a lot of fantasies involving Robin and some of them did include being whisked away on adventure with him. The prospect of leaving home wasn't as terrifying as he felt it ought to be. And he was curious about his older self and Robin's older self. "Let me get my shoes." Tim turned and walked out of the kitchen.
After a heartbeat Robin followed him. He moved on near silent feet as he followed Tim through the house to Tim's bedroom. Robin stayed a polite distance away but he never took his eyes off Tim. There was something heavy about his gaze.
Tim squirmed under the weight of it. He wasn't used to being the one who was watched. Tim grabbed his favorite hoodie and slipped his camera in the front pocket. Then he forced his feet into his shoes. He looked around the room one last time then at Robin. "I'm ready."
They took a cab, which made sense because Robin wasn't old enough to drive and Tim couldn't fly. They didn't speak during the ride. This was Gotham and one could never be too careful with information. When they parked outside the Artemis Hotel, Robin pulled a roll of hundreds from his utility belt. "If you tell anyone, anyone , you saw us, you'll find out that I'm not as friendly as Batman."
The cab driver nodded as he took the money. "It's been a slow night, sir. All I've been doing is driving around waiting for a call."
Robin nodded. His chin was raised, eyes hellfire behind the mask. He held the building door open for Tim then followed him inside.
The Artemis Hotel looked fairly normal from the first floor but when they got into the elevator, Robin entered a code. He stood stiffly, peeking glances at Tim before hastily looking away.
It was so different from how Robin usually behaved. Tim didn't understand. This entire scenario was bizarre and Tim was half convinced that he was going to die tonight. Maybe Robin wasn't the boy that Tim thought he was. He knew that this new Robin was far more vicious than the last one. Was he closer to a rogue than a hero? Tim reached out to tug on Robin's cape then dropped his hand at the last second. "Is there anything I should know before I go in?"
Robin looked at him fully now. His face slowly turned red from the roots of his hair and down his neck. "Red and Jay are…close." He stumbled on the last word, as though it wasn't the one he'd wanted to choose.
The elevator doors slid open before Tim could ask another question.
Robin led the way down an empty hallway to a door with a keypad. He punched in another code, hesitated before opening the door. "Red? Jay?"
"Still kicking, Robin," came a gruff voice. It was the voice of a person who smoked with some frequency. It was the voice of someone in immense pain. Tim had heard it before after following Robin and Batman through the city for the better part of two years. "You got him?"
Robin grabbed Tim by the arm and pulled him forward. He kicked the door shut behind him. It locked automatically. "I got him."
Tim's gaze was immediately drawn to the bed and he suddenly realized why Robin had stumbled in his words earlier. The two men on the bed were very clearly together. It wasn't just that they were pressed flush against each other. It was the way their fingers were laced together, the way soft nuzzles were exchanged, how relaxed they were in each others arms. They were clearly used to being physically close.
If they really were Tim and Robin's future selves, and Tim saw nothing to dissuade him from that notion, then. Which meant...that Tim and Robin were. They were a couple. Tim felt his cheeks turning a splotchy red. His pulse skyrocketed at the notion.
His elation and wonder didn't last long, though. It was dashed away the moment he examined them more critically. His future self was pale as a corpse with eyes that were barely focused. He was small and delicate, absolutely tiny compared to the future Robin. The only thing keeping him propped up was the man behind him. And Tim was scared that the man behind him was the only thing keeping him alive for this long too.
The future Robin was all muscle and hard lines. His expression was dark and weary, arms curled protectively around future Tim as though he could protect him from death. Even with the posturing, it was obvious that he wasn't doing so hot either. Sweat shone on his skin and his hands trembled as he held his lover. He had the saddest eyes that Tim had ever seen. The future Robin's eyes softened a little as he looked Tim over. "You were fucking tiny, baby bird."
Future Tim's gaze finally focused on Tim. He smiled. His eyes shifted to Robin beside him and that smile melted into something absolutely soft. "I had to…feed myself...a lot." Every word seemed to be causing him pain.
Both Robin and - what was he called? Jay? - exchanged looks. Robin shifted none too subtly closer to Tim.
What the other two were doing was background noise to Tim. He was aware but not focused on it. It may have been narcissistic of him but he only had eyes for himself. "You're me?"
"Yes." He smiled faintly. "They call me Red, sometimes."
That's what Robin had called him. Tim would ask about that later. Right now he wanted to know… "That's as big as I get?"
The question seemed to startle Red. Then he laughed. His expression twisted into one of pain at the movement. Something must be hurting him inside. "Uh, no. This is as big as I get. I...made bad choices. Too much coffee...and too little sleep and I...didn't eat enough. You'll probably get...bigger if you take care of yourself." His eyes flitted to Robin beside him.
"Will I get as big as Jay?" Tim pointed at him so that there was no confusion as to who he was referring to.
"Probably not." Red leaned back against Jay and closed his eyes. The conversation seemed to have worn him out.
Jay held him close, tight but careful. He placed a kiss on Red's hair. "You okay, baby bird?" There was that nickname again. "We can probably get the kids to find some drugs if you want."
Red shook his head. "I'm okay, Jaybird." He still hadn't reopened his eyes. "Come here, you two." His fingers tap against the bed.
Robin doesn't hesitate to climb into bed with them. His only hesitation comes when Tim doesn't immediately follow. "Come on, Tim."
Tim lingers on the edge of the bed. He rubs his knuckles together. "Why?"
Robin cocks his head to the side much in the same way Tim had done earlier. "Because we're dying." He crawls on his knees back to where Tim stands. "We're dying and I want to know…" Robin trails off but the word everything hangs in the air between them.
With some reluctance, Tim climbed onto the mattress. He crawled over to Red and Jay but kept Robin between them. This could be an elaborate prank or something and Tim wanted to be prepared to run for the door. If he could even get it open. Tim had memorized the code for the door and elevator but maybe there were different codes to get out.
Robin settled himself in the nook of Red's arm. There was something about his face when he looked at Red and Jay, a sort of open longing. He didn't make any attempt at hiding this expression and Tim noted that Jay looked at the two younger boys with the same expression. It must be a Robin thing.
Once everyone was settled, Red elbowed Jay in the ribs.
Jay sighed. "We have a lot to tell you and not a lot of time to do it so save your questions for the end." Then Jay told them everything. He started with their pasts, explained how Bruce Wayne (BATMAN!) had found all of them, talked about a fourth Robin named Damian. He gave them a rundown of all the major events that would shape Gotham and themselves. Then he got into what had happened to get them to this point. Jay dropped all of the names of superheroes without care. According to him, they were all dead in the future. Jay told them the horrific tale of watching as their family died, until it was just the two of them left in Gotham. It was the apocalypse and no one had seen it fast enough to stop it.
Red was mostly quiet during the explanation. After hearing about the damage he'd taken it was no surprise. The real surprise was that he was alive. He squeezed Jay's hand during the entire thing and occasionally stroked Robin's hair, offering silent comfort.
Tim found himself unable to doubt the story. Jay simply knew too much. Everything fit together like a puzzle in his head. His mind was buzzing with ideas, ways to save everyone. It was mostly a child's fantasy but it hit him hard. If they didn't do something then he and Robin were bound to the same future.
When Jay had finally finished his story it was much closer to dawn and both men were pale as ghosts. Jay had stopped sweating but that didn't seem to be a good thing. It looked like the only thing keeping them upright was each other and the headboard.
"How do we save the world?" Tim asked.
Red smiled faintly. "Breadcrumbs."
Jay picked up. "Leave a trail of clues for B. The problem with last time was that he didn't catch it fast enough. But we know where to look now so you two can point him in the right direction." Jay's eyes hardened as he looked at the two of them. "From far away from him."
Robin and Tim nodded dutifully. Nothing had turned Tim off to Batman more than what Jay told him about their relationship. He couldn't imagine hurting Robin like that and he really didn't even know the kid. Tim looked between Red and Jay. That would change, though. They were going to run away together and start a new life and it would be better than the one that Red and Jay escaped from. He reached over for the notepad and pen on the side table. "Tell me what we need to know for the clues."
Jay spoke more than Red did. He spat out the words between long pauses.
Red only sometimes corrected him or added a detail or gave a suggestion. These were rarely more than one or two words spoken that Jay would then elaborate on.
As Tim wrote it all down, Robin inched closer to him. Robin didn't get too close but it was clear that he wanted to. He watched the scrawl of Tim's hand and mouthed the words that Tim wrote.
Tim wrote down every word they said. His pen flew across the paper. Every detail was important, every date needed to be written down. Tim had never seen anyone die in front of him before but he knew that Red and Jay were getting close. He leaned closer to Robin. Something in him ached to have the relationship now that Red and Jay had. He knew it would take time and effort but Tim wanted it very badly. To love and be loved was all Tim wanted and Robin was his dream candidate.
Tim knew that he was running out of time when everything stopped hurting. All the pain from his surgery and the wound just melted into a buzz at the back of his mind. Tim could feel Jason's arms around him but not much else. His eyelids grew heavy with each moment and black patches were showing up in his vision. Tim let himself be soothed by Jason's voice as he explained to their past selves everything they needed to know.
Tim struggled to stay alive. He wanted to spend every moment he could with Jason before they were separated forever. And he didn't want to die in front of Timothy and Robin. That would be too traumatic for them and they were damaged enough without seeing themselves die.
Jason ran his thumb over the back of Tim's hand.
Tim squeezed his hand.
When Jason finally told them everything he wanted to, he fell silent. His heart against Tim's back beat so hard that it felt like it was trying to escape. He wasn't sweating anymore, his skin cold and clammy. Despite the rate of his heartbeat, Jason struggled to inhale.
If there was a chance that they would pull through, Tim would offer to move to make it easier for Jason to breathe. But they were dying and Tim wanted to be selfish. He wanted to die in his lover's arms. Through his lashes he watched Timothy and Robin.
Robin was easy to read. He was Jason, after all, which meant that all of his emotions were on his face. The lines of his body spoke his desires. Robin looked at Tim and Jason with pure envy and a whole lot of awe. He'd inched out from under Tim's arm to be closer to Timothy. They were now so close that their shoulders were almost brushing. Robin's eyes followed the lines of Timothy's hands. He didn't even know Timothy yet but it was clear as day that he desperately wanted to; that he wanted what they had in the future.
Timothy was harder to read but Tim knew himself. His eyes tracked between Robin and Jason. He didn't frown, per se, but the space between his eyebrows furrowed just the slightest bit. His eyes were sad when he met Tim's gaze. He cocked his head slightly in question. He wanted to know if Robin would grow up to be Jason. If that darkness, that sadness, the utter defeat and weariness in Jason's eyes would be there.
Tim didn't have much time. Wouldn't have many words for his past self. There was so much he wanted to say. Instead he settled with, "I know. But he's...if you leave...you get to keep him. Just like he is." That was one of Tim's biggest regrets, though it wasn't a regret in the traditional sense. Tim had fallen in love with Jason when he was Robin flying around the city. He'd loved that cocky, fierce boy. The Jason of now was like another person entirely. "I...fell in love...with my Jason...twice."
Timothy's mouth moved to roll Jason's name on his tongue. It occurred to Tim then that no one had told Timothy who Robin was. Judging by his reaction, Timothy hadn't yet figured out who the Bat Family were during the day.
Jason pressed a kiss to Tim's hair. "Time to go, birds. Get out of the city before B finds you." He didn't say the rest. He didn't have to.
Robin looked at the two of them again. He locked eyes with each of them in turn. "I'll take care of him."
Timothy flashed a surprised look at Robin. His cheeks colored. He met Tim's eyes. "Me too." He retreated off the bed and pulled Robin with him.
Robin stored the notepad in his uniform along with the phone Jason had given him. He kept a hand on Tim's arm. His gaze strayed back to Jason and Tim on the bed. "Thank you."
Tim's lips twitched in a smile he couldn't quite complete.
Timothy pulled the camera out of his hoodie pocket. Tim had known he would bring it. He held it up and silently took a picture of the two of them. His own proof. Tim wondered how many times the two of them would look at that picture in the years to come. He replaced the camera and waved. Then he allowed Robin to pull him out the door.
Tim relaxed against Jason. He closed his eyes and didn't try to open them again. "I love you, Jaybird."
Jason held him in a loose grip. "I love you too, baby bird. We...did...good." Jason's heart, which had been beating so quickly, suddenly stopped.
Tim, who had been holding on so strongly, finally let go.
Part Two
"Move! He's bleeding!" Jason shouted as he marched down the hallway with Tim in his arms. He saw the colorful shapes of children ducking out of his way as he headed for the bathroom. He kicked open the door and set Tim onto the counter. Jason bent down for the first aid kit.
Tim removed the dishcloth from his hand and let it bleed freely over the sink. His blue eyes were filled with mirth and his lips twitched in a smile. "You're so dramatic, Robin." He lightly kicked Jason in the ribs. "It's barely even a flesh wound. No bones."
"You are so terrible at taking care of yourself, Red." Jason straightened up with the first aid kit in hand. He set it on the counter beside Tim and dug through it for disinfectant and gauze.
The cut was bleeding a hell of a lot but it wasn't the most blood Jason had ever seen his lover loose at once. He was just. It was just. Well. Jason knew that his future/past self Jay had had good intentions what with bringing himself and Red back in time but it fucked Jason up a little now. Now that they were that age where everything had gone to shit and they'd died. Every time Tim bled, even the smallest of cuts, it was like seeing the man bleed out in that alley all over again. And it wasn't just that memory. He dreamed of Jay's memories, saw and felt all of the violence he'd lived through. The things he'd inflicted on Red before pulling his head out of his ass. So Jason couldn't fucking handle it when Tim bled. He locked that shit down, immediately.
Jason poured the disinfectant onto the wound.
Tim hissed but otherwise didn't complain. He still wore that infuriating smile on his face. The one he wore every time Jason took care of him.
"Robin," a blond head peeked around the corner, "is Red alright?"
Robin and Red. It was what they'd changed their names to years ago when they left Gotham. They had not been overly original as children and they'd still be reeling from the events that thrust them together. When Tim said they should change their names, Jason had blurted out the first thing that came to mind for Tim. Tim had given him a shy smile and said that he thought Jason should stick with the name Robin because Batman wasn't looking for a random boy named Robin. He was looking for a boy named Jason Todd. So that's what they did.
Jason didn't look up from securing the gauze to Tim's finger. "Red is an idiot but he's fine."
"And Robin is overreacting to what barely constitutes a flesh wound," Tim replied affectionately. He leaned forward to kiss Jason's forehead.
The blond child smiled. She was missing a tooth. The tooth hadn't fallen out from natural causes; her father had punched her so hard he'd knocked it out. Her mother had finally run away from the abusive father with her daughter only to leave her at the shelter to go back to the asshole a few weeks later. The girl had been left there and that's when Jason and Tim had gotten the call that there was another child who needed them to foster.
Jason liked the work. He liked the kids. He liked intimidating their abusers at the courthouses. It reminded him a bit of being Batman's Robin except that he actually had positive results to show for it. So he was still a little bitter about the whole thing with B in the future-that-didn't-happen. Sue him. "I am not overreacting."
An older boy joined the girl in the doorway. "Jeez, I thought he was dying for real this time what with the way you were going on, Robin." He was dressed like a goth from the nineties but his lips were curved up in an amused smile. The black around his eyes was kohl instead of bruises now. That smile was big progress; he wouldn't even smirk when he'd first come to them.
"Can't you tell I've been saved? My hero." His voice was high with sarcasm. Tim kissed his forehead again as Jason finished wrapping his finger. "Thank you for taking care of me." There was no hint of jest in his voice now, only a deep fondness and a gentle reminder of a vow made an in a hotel room years ago.
Jason tipped Tim's chin up and kissed him properly on the mouth.
"Oh gross," the boy said. He pulled the girl out of the bathroom. "Come on, let's go somewhere where we don't have to see their obvious displays of love."
Alone again for the moment, Jason pulled back. "I'll always take care of you, Tim." His voice was a whisper, barely loud enough to be heard over the chatter and play of the other kids in the house. "Thank you for letting me, baby bird."
Tim shivered against him. He kissed Jason again, wrapped his arms around Jason's neck to pull him down. They thought that he had grown taller than Red but he was still shorter than Jason. "Thank you for bringing me with you, Jason." His voice was low, his words only meant for Jason. "I like the life we've made, Jaybird."
"No regrets?" Jason teased softly. He still worried sometimes. When he was a child he hadn't realized just how much Tim liked Robin, how used to going out at night and dodging people Tim had become. It spoke volumes that he'd managed to stalk both Batman and the bad guys without being caught even once. Helping people and being a badass while doing it was in Tim's nature. It suited the Batman aesthetic well.
Tim graced Jason with another smile. "No regrets." He gently pushed Jason back and hoped down from the counter. "As much as I like where that could have been going, we've got to finish cooking dinner or we'll definitely be interrupted."
Jason watched Tim walk down the hallway back towards the kitchen, kept his eyes on the sway of Tim's hips. His heart ached with how much he loved Tim. Felt like he would burst from the amount of love he had for the other man. He was pulled from his revery by a stuffed animal hitting his head.
The goth teen leaned against his bedroom door frame. There was another stuffed animal in his other hand, which meant he'd been fully prepared for Jason to ignore him. "You're so in love it's disgusting, Robin." But he smiled as he said it.
Jason smiled back. "Yeah. I am." Tim wasn't the only one with no regrets.
Tim carried hot pans out into the dining room and set them on the potholders on the kitchen table. He had to reach between two kids to do it and he nearly ran into Jason turning around to go get more. When they'd talked about becoming foster parents, neither of them realized how much children eat. Sometimes it felt like all they did was cook and clean and help with homework and stop fights and bribe the kids into good behaviors.
When dinner was on the table and the younger kids had their plates filled - "yes, I made carrots again because that one won't eat anything green" - Tim sat down in his spot. He filled his own plate and chatted with the kids while he did it. Got caught up with how everyone's days went, with what they needed to be driven to tomorrow and who needed papers signed. There were eight kids at the table. Their table was always full, their house always full of children. Every day was something new. Not all of it was good but enough of it was.
After dinner the kids started on their homework while Jason and Tim did the dishes. The dishes were a rush job. The chore always was with that many kids and that much homework. There were only so many hours in a day and they still had one more thing to do before the bedtime rituals started. Jason and Tim helped with homework as needed, double checked completed homework to make sure it was satisfactory.
Maybe they were too lenient on the kids but after an hour of homework, the restlessness began to kick in and everyone was itching to get down to the basement. Finally one of the teenage girls threw her pencil onto the table. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at her. She tossed back her curly black hair. "C'mon, Red, Robin. Can't we go downstairs and do something we actually like for once?"
Jason and Tim exchanged looks. Jason stood up first. "Alright. Everyone pack your work up and meet us downstairs." Jason held out his hand to Tim and they walked down the basement stairs holding hands. Their basement was not in accordance to the city laws. It was much bigger than was allowed; the square footage was bigger than the rest of their house. But it needed the vaulted ceilings and multiple floors because down here was where they taught the kids how to fight and how to defend themselves.
Jason and Tim saw to it that none of the children who came into their care would ever be powerless again. Tim sat back and watched as Jason ran through what they were doing that night. He admired the way Jason's muscles rippled, the way he held himself with confidence. He liked that Jason still had that Robin smile and that Robin optimism. It had taken years before Tim accepted that his future self had been right. They had run away from the horrors of being a Bat and Tim had gotten to keep Robin just as he was. The Jason of the future was never made in part because they left Gotham but also because Tim never let Jason go a day without knowing that he was loved and wanted.
At his cue, Tim jumped in to the lesson. The kids learned fast and they were eager. So many of them had been hurt. All of them had come from Gotham. So many of them held that potential; the potential to be Bruce Wayne's next Robin. They couldn't save all of Gotham's orphans - there were just too many of them - but every child they did was one that wouldn't become either Bruce's soldier or a villain's thug. Tim walked around the room and corrected stances, he slid through the motions. Most of them he learned through extensive lessons; some of them were learned through dreams of Red's memories.
Tim paused by a cork-board wall. It held hundreds of photos of kids with Jason and Tim. Their family. All of the kids who had ever passed through the house. All of the ones they had saved. Tim took most of the photos. It turned out that he never lost his love of photography.
Jason came up behind him and wrapped his arms around Tim's waist. The kids groaned but they ignored it. Jason kissed Tim's neck before pulling away to yell "Go take showers and get to sleep!" He herded the kids upstairs. It was easier to get them to go to sleep after an extensive workout and a hot shower.
Tim stayed in the basement even after the door closed. The sudden silence was deafening. He opened a hidden safe in the wall and pulled out it's only contents. The first item was a cellphone. In the current year, it was nothing fancy or uncommon. When they had first gotten it, though, it was a rarity. It was the only one of its kind. He didn't unlock it. Didn't want to scroll through the photos that Jay had taken of his family and his lover. Not tonight. Instead, he looked at the second item.
It was a photograph of two men sitting propped up in bed. They wore leather and Kevlar suits. Their faces were pale and scarred; a split eyebrow on Jay and a line under Red's eye. Red's head was tipped back and Jay's gaze was lowered. Once upon a time there had been so much love in their gaze that a young Tim was breathless with the hope of having that one day.
Now, he was happy to say that he did.