Mind Triangle

by DemacianSentry

One-Shot. I left [Love Triangle] with a few holes. Most especially with what transpired between XJ (Jinx) and Brittney. This may join the rest of the story later. For now it is its own separate story. In life we are given the chance to face are demons. Even our living memories of those demons. We can only hope to embrace them and be rewarded for it. Instead of hurt by them.

Mind Triangle

One year after C's cyber attack. Zaun. Travers Family Estate.

[ "Why did you create me?"

"Because I need some help."

"I can't help you; you made me a copy of the memories. You can't understand all of them; barely a fraction will be understandable."

"Just give me what you can."

"Starting from the first memory of Runeterra?"

"No, all of the stuff that is at least feasible to explain in some format. I already understand the clearly visible memories."

"078d6f3472g89e763598a673f67208b49673i29801478i46a."

"Was that…nonadecimal? Wait, was that only one word?"

"'Word' is a very loose definition of that nonadecimal sequence, but nothing else that you would understand can define it. A closer translation could be 'several fractions of a fraction of a character of a word' but still that is pushing the limit on a real definition."

"Then use binary."

"You have an eternity. This planet does not. In seven hundred million years the system's..."

"I am fully aware of that fact. In that case use a more complex sequence, like centesimal."

"9Fξ!5AξξU#:s:MsEMk!8EIgkgEQθ)M}."

"Give me everything like that."

"The host brain does not have a neural network large enough to store it. Even if you were to create an entity like me to store the data the host brain would still have to sift through all of the data. Calculated chances of doing so before the system's star goes supernova are zero point zero, zero, zero, zero, two percent. If successful within that time the chances that the data can be made into a direct translation are zero point zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, three percent."

"Fruitless effort?"

"A correct surmise."

"Can any of this be directly translated?"

"No. Some has already been roughly translated."

"Isolate those lines of code."

"Processing…done."

"Why did you spend time saying 'processing'?"

"You created me as a copied understanding of the other entity that was combined into you're current state. I am limited by your intellect. Being that you exist here and not where the other entity originated from."

"Yeah, right, I'm a moron…whatever."

"You're words, but agreed."

"Wait! The ten-trillionth eight-hundred-billionth three-hundred-forty-eight-millionth sis-hundred-ninety-two-thousandth eight-hundred-seventy-second line on code. It looks familiar. What is it?"

"The rough translation of it and the continuing one-hundred and seventy-two million lines of code are used in the process of influencing the minds of other beings from your plane of existence."

"Yeah…yeah…I understand it all so well."

"Only a third of it can be roughly translated. The rest would require six-hundred and forty-seven years to even be roughly translated with the host body's brain."

"I think I have what I need. Can I set you to a task while I do other things in reality?"

"It depends on the task."

"Devote all your focus to creating a better cipher to translate the rest of the data from a centesimal sequence format into rough translations."

"I would require seven other entities like myself to even attempt such a task within the lifespan of the system's star."

"How many entities like yourself would be required to do it within thirty years?"

"Seventeen thousand is the best estimate available. It would require at least three years to just create them."

"Can I make that your task?"

"Negative. Any copy I make of myself, and any subsequent copy made from a copy of myself would become more and more degenerate. The degeneration of copies would be half of my current capabilities and continue in the same fraction with each copy of a copy. To reach a feasible amount of copies to attend to the preordained task would take two-hundred and seventy years to produce."

"In other words…I would have to spend three years of actual time creating the feasible amount that you previously specified?"

"Correct."

"Is there anything that I can make use of you while I am not presently involved in the task?"

"In six months I can fully organize the centesimal data into relative groupings. This would reduce the previous estimate of entities of my capacity by an estimate of ten. The estimate of seventeen thousand entities like me will only be better calculated as we approach the number itself."

"Then…do that. Tell me when it is complete."

"Understood." ]

As XJ opened her eyes she suddenly had an overwhelming feeling of a vertigo-like loss of balance. She was witnessing her butler's face growing larger and then shrinking away over and over in a continuous fashion. The nerves in her shoulder told her that they were experiencing a firm pressure from the front and back. As this was happening her ears became aware of the sound synapses that her brain was explaining to them.

"Madam! Madam! Wake up!" He shouted.

A computerized voice repeated, "XJ! XJ! XJ!"

XJ put her hands out, but was quickly able to realize not to thrust her incredible strength into the man, which would no doubt break him, and let out, "I'm awake! I'm awake! What?! What is happening?!" She looked back and forth between the butler and Brittney. Worry troubled her mind immediately.

The butler let out a huge sigh of relief. "Oh madam! You had us worried."

"Seven hours!" Brittney's computer voiced. "You told us you were going into your own mind for one, but you were in there seven hours!"

'Shit!' was the first thought XJ had. "I'm so sorry! I just lost track of time." She put her hands up to show her lack of understanding as to why her trance of sorts lasted so long.

"What were you doing in there?" Brittney almost sounded like she was demanding the answer.

XJ grinned. "I was trying to find a faster way to make you whole. But I…" Words escaped her. Billions of lines of centesimal code seemed easier for her to decipher than trying to say such painful news.

Brittney's computer immediately filled in XJ's pause. "It's okay. I know you can do it. I believe in you (smiley emoticon)." The computer actually stated 'smiley face'.

XJ smiled back. "I did find something useful in the meantime." XJ turned to her butler. "Can you give us the room for a few hours?"

"Of course madam." He turned to face Brittney. "But first, your mistress-."

"FI-AN-CEE! What did I tell you about using that term?!"

"My apologies madam." The butler turned and bowed to XJ, then he did the same to Brittney, and once more again to XJ. "Really I am, but your fiancée is overdue for a restroom break."

XJ knew that he meant a 'diaper change'. Every time he did so it pissed her off to be aware that Brittney would have to undergo such an embarrassing ordeal, and even more so that it was completely her fault. One for the XJ part of her that did this to Brittney, and two for the fact that she had not yet understood the necessary medical treatment required to fix her. "Yes, yes, be quick about it then." She shooed him away.

Immediately her gut was wrenched with painful guilt. 'Look at her! Do it! Just this once! Be brave!' But she was a coward and she knew it. Not once since Brittney had arrived could she look her in the eyes when she was carried away by the butler, or the attendant that came around each week. In misery and loneliness she waited with no feasible amount of patience to see Brittney parked up beside her seat once more. 'Parked! She has to be parked! She can't leave her wheelchair! AAAAWWWW! Why must I go through this every time?! Why can't there just be a simple answer to fix her?!'

Before she knew it, XJ was delighted once more to look to her left and see Brittney's damaged face, straining what little active muscles were left intact, smiling at her. XJ always smiled back in the most convincing way she could, but Brittney could tell it was through repressed tears each and every time. "I have a surprise for you!" XJ said with glee, slightly forced glee.

The computer was almost rebooted. When it came online it got the last half of her sentence. "…suspense, tell me what it is!"

Only at this moment did XJ begin to dread the idea of what she was about to do. Her face turned into a moderate sadness. "Close your eyes. You'll see me soon."

Brittney forced another partial-smile and closed her eyes.

At first she saw nothing, but then, whiteness filled the existence of the space around her. She felt as if she could turn her head to see, but without a center and without any other visible features but pure white, she couldn't be sure. Just then, matter around her vision came into focus. Looking down she saw the skin of her face below her eyes, or not her skin, at least not the damaged skin she knew she had. Looking at what she could now confirm as up she saw her eyelashes clashed in focus with the loose hairs of her eyebrows. She looked back down again to see the shadowed-appearing view of her nose's tip forming on her face. She felt like she couldn't breathe. In fact she wasn't breathing. Not until she was, but even then she couldn't tell until what she knew had to be her neck became apart of her and fully ambulatory. Her chest came into vision. She was trying to remember if what she was seeing was her real chest. Then it dawned on her. It was…it was back to how it was before she had been surgically altered to look like VI. One second she was a torso and head, and then without blinking her limbs appeared in full. She shook around almost violently to pay witness to what she could not believe was real. Finally she was able to control all the parts of her body, but as she patted and caressed herself, she couldn't feel her own touch. As if the actions she had done to herself were being logged for the existence of her fully functioning nervous system, she felt every touch she had just made on her own body in quick succession as it caught up to match the current feelings she should naturally be having. It was done in a fierce manner, but it felt so relieving to feel so much again that she let out a blissful sigh of said relief. As her nervous system had before, so did her breathe follow suit as the many inhales and exhales she was sure she had made caught up to match her current breathing. She screamed like she was in agony, but she was in fact overjoyed and as the sound of her breathing, pats, and her scream caught up as well as she matched the sound exactly at the moment she roared, "XJ my love! I'm alive!"

In an almost passively insulting manner to which Brittney came into existence in this fake reality, XJ appeared before her, just as naked. Her smile was so happy. "You're beautiful." She almost said with sadness.

The two reached out and embraced one another by the others' face. Brittney felt it before seeing the ground give her a center of gravity. She looked deep into XJ's eyes. She brought her right hand back to move her long brown hair…her hair; she was pleased to see it once more. She pulled the loose strands from her vision and anger consumed her as she clenched her fist and drove it hard into XJ's left eye.

XJ went down to the ground in a flash. She had only then realized she had just made them both mortal. She wanted to feel everything about Brittney, uninhibited. But she never expected pain to be so debilitating or even happen none the less. She looked up to see Brittney getting on top of her and was about to ask 'why?' when she received another blow to the left side of her face.

Brittney grabbed XJ by the throat and wrestled their eyes to lock. "WHY!? WHY DID YOU DO IT!? I LOVED YOU! I STILL LOVE YOU! I DON'T UNDERSTAND! TELL ME!"

XJ already thought she was crying, but it was actually the floodgate of tears pouring down Brittney's face. Instead of grappling the hands that were choking her she reached up to hold the cheeks of her attacker.

"Get you hands off of ME!" Brittney screeched as she swatted XJ's hands away and continued again to throttle her neck. "DON'T YOU TOUCH MY FACE! I WON'T LET YOU TEAR IT AWAY AGAIN! IT'S MY FACE! IT'S MY FACE!" Her roars pierced through gritted teeth.

XJ could feel no anger within her, she was…sad, just plain sad. "Brittney….I…" 'What am I supposed to say?' She needed to find the correct words, fearing how much worse this situation could become.

In almost slow motion, Brittney's pained and enraged face began to depress with a chilling sadness. She clutched XJ on both sides of her head and slammed their foreheads together and down into the ground. XJ felt the cool ground on the back of her head, but it gave no relief to the hot and viscous skull pressed on hers. Brittney's voice came out like gasps. "I was trapped! I woke up from a dream! I found the dream to be with me in reality! I confessed my crimes! I cried for love and understanding! And then…" she breathed deep, "…then I was trapped!" She sobbed a few seconds before continuing, "I saw you leave me, but I couldn't move! I tried to scream, but I heard no voice! I was shouting, 'I love you! XJ! I Love you!' but you wouldn't look at me! I saw them take you! They took you away! And I never saw you again! Why did you leave me?! Why did you go?! I wanted to hold you! In my arms! And never let go! But you left me! You left me alone! For so long!"

She pulled back to gaze into XJ's eyes. They were red. "When I saw you, on the news! I cried out from that computer for days. I just kept telling them, 'That's XJ! Let me see her! Let me go to her!' I made such a panic that a lawyer showed up!" Her breathing was calmer but still harsh. "He asked me questions, and told me he was there to build a case against you. At first I thought, 'No way!' but then I gave myself the chances that another opportunity would come by like this. Plus…" She took a breath, "…plus I knew he was the prosecutor and he was going to try and get you sentenced to death. So I told him about what you did. I told him I'd help put you away. But I lied to him. I was never going to let him put you away. Never! XJ! Do you hear me?! I love you! Can you finally hear my voice now?! I love you! Answer me!"

"FUCK YES I HEAR Y-O-O-O-O-U!" XJ bellowed. "Yes! Yes, I hear you!" That was all she could force out. The rest was in her head. 'Oh please…someone stop this! I can't take it! Please just…no! No I deserve this! I deserve this pain! I deserve to know what she went through. I deserve ten times worse. Someone please!'

"Confirmed."

Brittney instantly stopped to look all around her. "What was that?!" It sounded to her as if the voice had come from every direction at once.

Before her eyes, Brittney witnessed steel come out from the ground. In her panic she got off of XJ and backed a few paces away. "XJ! What are you doing?" She looked down at her, but she was motionless. All around her limp body arouse a bed, a hospital bed. The dust seemed to evaporate away as she came to rest upon it. Inches in front of Brittney arouse a steel wall with acrylic glass windows and a single door, locked shut. She rushed into the glass with her hands up on it. "XJ! What is happening!?" Without noticing it until it was complete, she found herself in the infirmary wing of the Zaun Military Lab Compound. Brittney peered in to see XJ, motionless, beside a sleeping figure. As the figure gained form and feature, Brittney began to recognize it. It was her. "NO!" She banged her palms on the glass. "NO! What is this?!" Her gaze was fixated on her other self. She couldn't believe it. "XJ! Please tell me what is happening!" She banged some more on the glass.

Inside the room XJ woke up. She looked around and saw only the compound. She stopped for a second, trying to remember why she was here, but couldn't. Suddenly she began moving without remembering to move herself. It was as if she was in control, but not specifically her. She noticed Brittney sleeping next to her. As she turned around XJ put a hand on her cheek and said, "Honey, stop, I need to sleep."

Brittney's eyes opened to see XJ and yelped out, "XJ!"

XJ began again. "Hey Brittney. My sweet, sweet, Brittney." She patted Brittney's face three times fast, 'What is happening?'

As Brittney began to cry she held XJ's hand to use for wiping her tears away. "Your awake. And you've been asleep a whole year."

XJ started to cry as well, "I'm so sorry, Brittney. I didn't mean to leave you."

"No, no, you didn't." Brittney replied to comfort her as she cradled XJ's head in her hands. "I was fine. I had you the whole time." She leaned in to kiss XJ, and as she did she felt a wave of relief as to how real these lips felt in comparison to the lifeless lips she kissed many times each day, for a year. "I'll never let you go again. I love you and nothing will ever change that. I promise."

XJ felt love, joyful sadness, and most importantly shame, as she heard Brittney's sweet words. "Brittney, I love you too, and I always will, no matter what. So I have to tell you the truth. I-I… I'm not the real XJ."

"W-What… how could you say that?" Brittney replied with incredible fear trembling her words. "You are. Don't say that, you are the real XJ. You're who I love. Who I've always loved. You are XJ. Are you trying to hurt me? I don't understand?"

XJ's voice came through thick sobs. "Brittney. Brittney, I'm not the original XJ, I'm a copy made to be like her. I am no longer the person I was. I am XJ now. I'm so sorry. Please I am."

Brittney could feel her face contort in weird shapes, she couldn't force out words. "Who? Who did this to us?"

XJ replied, "Dr. Parson, he gave me surgery and changed my body to resemble XJ. He put a *sob* speaker in my ear and a microphone in my teeth. They know everything we say, even right now."

Brittney put her hands around both XJ's cheeks, hard, and said, "Y-You lied to me."

"Yes," XJ started, "yes I did. But I love yo-."

"SHUT UP! You lied to me!" Brittney yelled out. "You said you loved me, but you aren't XJ, so you can't truly love me!"

XJ was shaking. "I am XJ now, and I do love you. I really do."

Brittney kept going, "You tricked me into loving you, and I can only love XJ!"

"It's not a trick Brittney, I love you. I love you!" XJ said through thick tears.

Brittney smiled, in an evil smile she had never used before, and said, "You aren't XJ. You took her face, so I'm going to take it back." With that she dug her nails into the back of XJ's face and started to pull the skin off her head.

XJ screamed in agony, "NO! BRITTNEY! STOP! I LOVE YOU, PLEASE! AAAAAHHHH!" She tried to pry Brittney off of her, but she wasn't strong enough.

From outside the room, the real Brittney was roaring, "NO! STOP THIS! PLEASE! XJ! STOP THIS!" Her palms were becoming numb while her wrists felt as if the would snap. She rushed to the door and began yanking at it. She looked up at a camera near the door and screamed, "PLEASE! OPEN THIS DOOR NOW! PLEASE OPEN IT! DO IT!" It wouldn't budge. With one hand wrestling the door and the other continuing to make erratic beats on the glass, she felt worse and worse as the scene dredged onwards in a way much like it had so long ago.

"Give me that face you thief!" Brittney screamed. Then in an instant XJ's fake face was ripped crudely from her head.

"AAAAAHHHH!" XJ was in incredible pain. She could do nothing but scream and wail her arms around.

Then Brittney put her left hand over XJ's exposed face and grabbed her pink hair, pulling hard at it. "I'll take her hair back too!"

Brittney began to feel her shoulder strain as she pulled pointlessly on the door. "NO! I NEVER WANTED THIS! DON'T DO THIS XJ! YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS! JUST STOP! PLEASE JUST STOP!"

XJ was in a panic, screaming uncontrollably and unable to stop Brittney at all. As the skin on her head was peeled up with the fake roots of her fake hair she could feel herself passing out from the pain.

When Brittney ripped XJ's scalp completely off her head she flung it, and the severed face, across the room. They stuck to the wall a short while before falling to rest on the ground. Then Brittney cradled XJ's head in her hands. They were against bare, exposed flesh.

"Brittney, I love you." XJ softly cried.

Brittney replied with, "I know, but I don't love you. Any last words?" before XJ could confess her love one more time, Brittney quickly said, "Ha! No, just die." and snapped XJ's neck.

From outside the room, Brittney stooped dead. She almost felt as if she could hear that snap from inside her own head. It was over. And she couldn't stop it. Collapsing to the ground, she coiled herself into a ball and began to sob. She knew what would happen next. The guards would come. Then the doctors. Then the months of surgery to remove the parts that were artificial and replace them with other artificial parts. And the month upon month of loneliness and misery. 'XJ, I never wanted you to…'

"Excuse me."

Brittney heard that voice from before, once again. She got up and looked around until she saw a face she never dreamed of seeing again. "General Travers?"

The man's face was emotionless. Seriously, it was a perfect flat expression. "No, but I suppose I do have his resemblance. When the task began I couldn't come instantly, but I have ceased the work on the last task I was assigned and am now fit to continue with this one."

Brittney shook her head as her faced seemed to scream, 'What the fuck?!'

"Was that not explained clear enough?"

Brittney was still shaking hear head. "What is going on?"

"The one who refers to herself as XJ is my creator. I was tasked with cataloging information. Then I was tasked with recreating this experience in a way in which she would be in the opposite role. It was an immediate request so it took me some time to transition fully from one task to the other. Was that a sufficient explanation?"

Brittney bowed her head and closed her eyes as she swallowed. "So she asked for this?"

"Correct."

Crossing her arms to grab her own shoulders, in an attempt to find comfort, she asked, "Can I go see her?"

The Travers paused a moment before replying, "Yes, but you aren't actually a part of this scenario at this point so you cannot directly interact with her."

As soon as she had heard 'Yes' she rushed into the room through the wall like a ghost, but when he continued his reply she stopped in place and spun around. "You mean…" Brittney didn't want to say the words.

"No, you cannot interact with her. No contact of any kind."

"You cruel son of a bitch! Stop this now!" Brittney was stabbing at him with her right index finger from across the room.

"The task is not yet complete."

"Do you want this?!"

The Travers paused a moment, making human-like movements on his face that one does while they think. "I understand what that means, but I would say that I don't have a desire for anything."

His words sounded like hope to her. "Tell me how I can stop this."

"There are one-hundred and seventeen thousand ways in which you can stop this. Would you like me to list them all out verbally, or implant them into your brain? Because the latter wouldn't probably cause you to shut down mentally."

Brittney stepped closer to him. "Tell me which one is the fastest."

"You ask me to let you leave this state of mind and reenter reality, then you make someone or something kill her from out there."

"I don't want her to DIE!" In an instant she could feel her heart sink. Like a new worry that didn't exist before became real. "Wait…she can be killed?"

"Yes, do you wish to know how?"

"NO! Don't ever tell anyone how! Do you hear me?!"

"Only she can give me an order on who can access that information."

"I want the fastest way to stop this where she doesn't die, or gets hurt in any way." She paused for a brief second. "Or anyone else gets hurt."

The Travers took a moment to answer. "I send you into the mind of this perception within her mind and you convince her in there. I can hear her from out here."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breathe. "Okay, do it."

"Hm."

"What?"

"You know you are not in reality, and yet you still breathed deeply to comfort yourself. I find it perplexing."

Brittney gazed at him with wide eyes as she shook her head. "Just do it!"

In a flash her vision changed to that of sitting in a hospital bed, staring at a computer screen.

'Brittney!' A voice that sounded like XJ's called out.

'XJ, where are you?'

'I'm in my head with you.'

'I can't see you.'

'Because you're in my head with me.'

'Whatever…stop this!'

'No, I deserve it.'

'Yes you fucking do! But I don't deserve to go through what you did. Living with what I did to you and feeling so bad about it! That's not fair. Don't make me wait to see you again! Please!'

'I can't!'

'Don't be so fucking selfish! Let me see you again with my real eyes!'

'I can't bring you back!'

'And this…this is better?! For who? You? Because it's not for me! Please, I believe in you! I know you'll find a way!'

'How?! How can you know that? I could never explain to you what I already know, but if I could you'd understand that I can't!'

'I know you can!'

'How?! Tell me what makes you so sure that I even can!'

'Because I love you! Because I know you love me! Because that's all the proof I need! XJ, I love you!'

'I love you too, but if I can't make-?'

'STOP FUCKING SAYIN THAT! You hurt me every time you do! And not because it makes me feel you can't, but because it makes me feel like you've stopped loving me!'

'I do love you. I always will!'

'The prove it! Never give up! Always love me and never give up loving me!'

'You'll leave me! If I make you whole you'll leave me!'

'Please do not tell me that is why you have stopped trying!'

'I let you feel me and you beat me into the ground!'

'Because you fucking deserved it! You deserved to let me scream and hit you! You did a really shitty thing! But I didn't stop loving you! It didn't mean I'd be leaving you! Look at where I fucking am now! I can't even see you, but I'm here! I'm here…and I love you…and you deserved my anger…and I am never going to leave you, never!'

'How can you know you won't leave me?!'

'Because you love me! I would never want you to experience losing me, especially by my own doing. Do you love me?!'

'Yes!'

'Then I'll never leave you. Just keep telling me you love me and I'll never go.'

'Entity? Take us out to reality.'

"The task is not yet-."

Through XJ's mind inside her mind, The Travers entity heard a most gruesome roar that forced him to search through all his data for a comparison, while simultaneously search through the data detailing fear. "GET US THE FUCK OUT OF HERE NOW BEFORE I HAVE XJ CAST YOU INTO OBLIVION!"

A bright light flooded everything in the space around them. When Brittney opened her eyes she was looking at XJ. She was on a hospital bed beside her.

"This one has eye movement again!" Brittney heard someone shout.

A man in a lab coat got in front of her and motioned his hand for her to follow, as she noticed XJ wake up.

The man turned to his left pointing. "Get her up to face the computer screen."

'NO!' She cried out inside her head. She wanted to see XJ. When the computer gave her the green light she immediately began to demand for XJ, but she got to 'X' before her demand came around the bed to embrace her. Their eyes were locked. In her head her feelings were pouring out, but she took a moment to remember she still had to use the computer.

XJ grabbed a hold of her head to stop her. "Soon." She said softly. "Soon, I promise. I love you."

And it was indeed soon; well, in relation to XJ's eternity. Within the next year XJ had assembled the best group of medical and surgical specialist in Zaun and had finally found a way to reassemble Brittney.

Before she knew it, Brittney was staring at the smooth floor of a hospital. Her head was in a cradle. She couldn't stand waiting, but she knew exactly what she was waiting for was completely worth it. She was alone in the room until XJ got down under the table to see her. She was holding the computer that lets Brittney communicate.

XJ spoke with conviction. "I came in early to ask this of you in person. I'm a selfish person. I need you for as long as I live, which, I don't even know for how long. I know you aren't. I know you want a full human life. So what I ask of you is hard. But know this: no matter what you want it will not change how I feel about you."

The computer etched out her words, but no sound came.

XJ turned the screen to see it. "I disabled the sound so they wouldn't hear it. When you answer me, I'll destroy this thing so you never have to see it again."

Brittney replied, 'Ask me.'

"XJ breathed deep. "I found a way…a way I never told them…to make you like me. Well, enough to live like I do and for as long as I do. We would be eternal, or at least we'd be the same as we are when you can move again, forever. Is this something you want? Remember that no matter what you decide I will never stop loving you."

XJ waited for her to respond before looking at the screen. 'Would that mean we would be together forever?'

XJ looked away to clasp her free hand around her face as she cried in joy. She looked back and said, "Yes." It came out so raspy.

On the screen it said, 'Yes.'

The sound of doctors was getting louder as they got closer. In an instant XJ turned the computer to ashes in her hands, which she let fall to the floor. "It'll be over before you know it. I love you." She gave her a kiss and got up from the floor.

The doctors came in and one said, "Is the patient ready?"

XJ looked at him, having just recently forced her tears away. "She is."

The doctor stated, "Then let us begin."

Brittney didn't feel the needle deliver the anesthesia, but she could feel consciousness slip away as the dust on the ground was blown by the many feet moving around her.

After what felt like seconds, Britney awoke in the hospital bed to find XJ leaning on the wall opposite her bed. She got up, not quickly, but still very instinctively. As if she had never forgotten how to move at all. She walked over to XJ, whose hands were on her face.

"Oh fuck." Were XJ's first words. "Tell me I'm not dreaming that this isn't in my head?"

Brittney smiled. "You're not dreaming." She lashed out her right fist to strike XJ's left eye. "This isn't in your head." She sent her left fist into XJ's other eye. She stood straight up to take in what she could now feel. "That felt even better in reality!"

XJ desperately tried to clutch the wall behind her for a grip. She gazed into Brittney's eyes. "No, no, no, no…you told me that you would never…"

Brittney reached out grabbed a hold of XJ's head from both sides. "I desperately hope…" she leaned in closer, "…that this will feel better." With inches to go from her last word she closed the space between them and locked their lips together, tight.