Sometimes
A stream of consciousness fic by Ame
Disclaimer Stuff -
Cloud, Aerith, Final Fantasy VII, and all related don't belong to me. They belong to Square and all the other wonderful peoples. Thank you very much.
_______
Sometimes I wonder.
Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if you hadn't died. If someone else had, or if I had, or if God knows who had. How different everything would be. As I lie here, thinking about this, other things come to mind.
I wonder about where you are right now. If you're in your Promised Land or still in the Lifestream, an endless flow of memories and the shadows of past lives. Maybe you've been reborn already, as fresh and as beautiful as you were when I first saw you. I wish you could tell me. Hell, I wish -anyone- could tell me.
I can still remember that moment. It's clear and bright as if it just happened. How you fell into my arms, like an angel in peaceful sleep.
Except you weren't sleeping.
How my world seemed to shatter apart. How when I tried to pick up the pieces, they only cut me deeper and deeper still. And they're still tearing me apart.
Sometimes I wake up screaming; hoping it was all a dream. I half expect you to be there and when I don't find you, I cry myself to sleep like I used to when I was small. I dream again, seeing you die over and over and over until even the silence is screaming at me.
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I woke up and it -was- all a dream. To see you standing there and feel the happiness bubble up from inside to become a rushing torrent of hysterical joy. Pure and endless and perfect.
I wonder what I would say if I had a chance to speak to you again. So many things come to mind, but I know better. When I finally saw you, I wouldn't be able to speak. Not a sound. But unfortunately, it's you who's speaking no longer.
And you know what I wonder most of all? I'll tell you.
Sometimes I wonder, what would have happened if I had taken the time to say...
...I love you.
.fin.
_______
Author's notes - It was kinda short. But I hope you liked it. And if you haven't guessed by now, I'm a big CloudxAerith fan. If you liked this, maybe I'll write more fics in this style. Actually, this is the first completed fic I've published. Compliments and comments will be worshipped. Flames will be responded to courteously. I'm such a cream puff. ~Ame ^o^
A stream of consciousness fic by Ame
Disclaimer Stuff -
Cloud, Aerith, Final Fantasy VII, and all related don't belong to me. They belong to Square and all the other wonderful peoples. Thank you very much.
_______
Sometimes I wonder.
Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if you hadn't died. If someone else had, or if I had, or if God knows who had. How different everything would be. As I lie here, thinking about this, other things come to mind.
I wonder about where you are right now. If you're in your Promised Land or still in the Lifestream, an endless flow of memories and the shadows of past lives. Maybe you've been reborn already, as fresh and as beautiful as you were when I first saw you. I wish you could tell me. Hell, I wish -anyone- could tell me.
I can still remember that moment. It's clear and bright as if it just happened. How you fell into my arms, like an angel in peaceful sleep.
Except you weren't sleeping.
How my world seemed to shatter apart. How when I tried to pick up the pieces, they only cut me deeper and deeper still. And they're still tearing me apart.
Sometimes I wake up screaming; hoping it was all a dream. I half expect you to be there and when I don't find you, I cry myself to sleep like I used to when I was small. I dream again, seeing you die over and over and over until even the silence is screaming at me.
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I woke up and it -was- all a dream. To see you standing there and feel the happiness bubble up from inside to become a rushing torrent of hysterical joy. Pure and endless and perfect.
I wonder what I would say if I had a chance to speak to you again. So many things come to mind, but I know better. When I finally saw you, I wouldn't be able to speak. Not a sound. But unfortunately, it's you who's speaking no longer.
And you know what I wonder most of all? I'll tell you.
Sometimes I wonder, what would have happened if I had taken the time to say...
...I love you.
.fin.
_______
Author's notes - It was kinda short. But I hope you liked it. And if you haven't guessed by now, I'm a big CloudxAerith fan. If you liked this, maybe I'll write more fics in this style. Actually, this is the first completed fic I've published. Compliments and comments will be worshipped. Flames will be responded to courteously. I'm such a cream puff. ~Ame ^o^