Title: Goodnight Jackson

Author: Ceindreadh
Permission to archive: Yes to WWOMB, anybody else, please ask first.
Genre: Crack!
Characters: Gibbs, Jackson
Rating: PG-15
Summary: Post scene for Rule 51 – crack!fic (you have been warned!)

Warnings: SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 'RULE 51' YOU WILL BE SPOILED IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY WATCHED IT

Disclaimer: These characters belong to DPB, CBS, Paramount, et al. No copyright infringement is intended.

Jackson Gibbs looked up as he heard the door to his shop open. He smiled at the pretty young thing who came in. "Can I help ya?"

"Yes Mr. Gibbs," said the woman as she turned the door sign to closed, "I think you can."

"What do you mean; Paloma Reynosa is in the country?" Gibbs yelled down the line at the unfortunate NCIS agent who'd been given the duty of calling him.

"I'm sorry Agent Gibbs; I don't know who approved her papers, all I know is that she was red flagged with a notice to inform you if she passed through Immigration."

Gibbs hung up and hit speed dial. The seconds before he heard his father's voice seemed like an eternity. "Dad," he started to say before he realized he was listening to an answering service. Cursing under his breath, he broke the connection and headed for the car.

"Sheriff," said Gibbs as he broke every speed limit on the books. "How did he sound on the phone?" Gibbs had been in two minds as to whether to get the local police involved. On the one hand, they'd be better than nothing if Paloma got to Stillwater before he did. On the other hand, if Paloma was already there and saw a bunch of uniforms on the horizon, she was likely to go down shooting, and Jackson would be the first casualty. Finally he'd compromised by contacting the Sheriff's department and asking them to send a single patrol car on what could easily be explained as a routine sweep of the area. The Sheriff had also promised to keep trying to contact Jackson by phone and had just called Gibbs back to report a positive response.

"He sounded a little edgy," admitted the Sheriff. "Oh he said everything was fine and dandy, but he sounded like he really needed me to get off the line. Could be this woman had a gun on him. I think maybe I should send some of my men in."

"Under no circumstances," Gibbs was almost yelling. "Do that and my father's a dead man." If he isn't already, Gibbs added to himself. "Keep watch along the perimeter and don't let anybody in or out until I get there." He broke the connection and pressed even harder on the accelerator.

"And if I must, I promise to personally visit Pennsylvania and shoot your father in the head." Gibbs slammed the wheel as he remembered the words. He should have known it wasn't going to be an empty threat. His father was probably already dead...unless of course she was waiting for *him* to show up. Yes he thought as took a sharp corner, that would suit her thirst for revenge. Why just kill a man when you could kill him in front of his family. "Not while I'm alive," Gibbs said to the empty air.

Gibbs crept along the hallway, gun at the ready. He'd made a quick reconnaissance of the area around the house, satisfying himself that Paloma had no men in place watching the outside. Then, using the skills honed in his teens, he'd made his way under cover of darkness to the rear of the house, before climbing up the oak tree to what used to be his bedroom window. The tree seemed a hell of a lot taller than it had been thirty, okay, thirty five years earlier, thought Gibbs, wiping a bead of sweat from his brow as he pulled himself along a branch. And the window to his room seemed a hell of a lot smaller. But what hadn't changed was the faulty latch on the window, and it took less than a minute before Gibbs had slid it open and crawled inside.

Once he'd picked himself up off the floor – which was definitely a lot harder than when he'd landed on it before – Gibbs listened carefully at the door for a few minutes before emerging into the hallway.

Gun at the ready, he inched his way towards the staircase, listening all the while for any sounds that would tell him where his father was being held.

In spite of all his alertness, he was still almost taken by surprise when the bathroom door a few yards ahead of him opened and Jackson Gibbs stepped out.

"Dad!" hissed Gibbs, quickly aiming away.

"God, Leroy!" said Jackson. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack? Cause you'l l have to get in line. Hey, what's going on…"

Gibbs grabbed Jackson and dragged him back into the bathroom. "Dad, where's Paloma Reynosa? Did she hurt you? What did she do?"

"Paloma? Oh you mean that pretty little girl from Mexico." A wide grin split Jackson's face. "Oh she's just waiting to finish me off."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Yes Mr. Gibbs," said the woman as she turned the door sign to closed, "I think you can."

Jackson saw the gun in her hand and his face fell, "Oh no, you're that lady from the drugs cartel, Leroy warned me you might be coming around to kill me. Course I told him he was just exaggerating, but he insisted on giving me the heads up."

"Did he also tell you *why* I would want to kill you?"

"Didn't see the point in asking. Somebody wants you dead, well it doesn't really matter why, you're still going be dead whatever reason they had for doing it."

"If it's any consolation, I will make this as painless as possible," Paloma pointed the gun at Jackson's head. "Do you have any last requests? A message for your son, perhaps?"

"Well, I figure he's gonna get the message from you all right…but there is *something* you could do for me…"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"You did *what*?" Gibbs looked at his father as if unable to believe what he was hearing.

"Asked her if I could choose the way she'd kill me. Figured it couldn't hurt. She said if it was something she could do with the resources she had available, then she would."

"So you asked her to give you a heart attack…from sex?"

"I'm an old man, Leroy," said Jackson. "Figured it was as good a way to go as any."

"So she's in your bedroom waiting to screw you to death?" Gibbs checked his weapon. "We'll see about *that*!"

"Oh come on, Leroy, you think I'd leave a lady hanging all this time? We've already done it three times."

"Three times…"

"Yeah…I was tired. But I'm all better now! So if you'll excuse me son, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do."

"You are *not* going back in there."

"A promise is a promise, Leroy. She said she'd screw me to death, and I intend to keep her to it! Course it might take a couple of years. Course I don't believe in living in sin. Say, how do you feel about calling her, 'Mom'? Leroy, what are you doing son, now come back here, you're too old to be climbing out your bedroom window like that!"

The End

Author's notes: the 'three times…I was tired' is misquoted from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Ralph Waite played Grandpa Ventura in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Jr.