Emmancipation

Disclaimer: I own nothing except the air I breathe. And that technically belongs to the Universe.

AN: The fic starts during the events in Hello and will parallel what happens in the show from here on, with several alternations where I think it's necessary for the sake of jocularity/romanticism. Although it's in third person, it's a story told mainly from Emma's perspective, the only one that matters. The main purpose of this fic is to figure out what goes in Emma's head in her quest to develop her own sexuality and resolve her intimacy issues. I'm trying to make it funny. I'll probably screw it up.

Worth mentioning: English is not my first language. .

Characters: Will/Emma mostly, and later on I'll introduce a psycho-therapist.

Chapter 1 – The pink elephant

"Well… ever." Emma replied to Will's question after gathering all her courage.

There it was. The cat was out of the bag. The pink elephant in the room had been exposed, in all his naked glory. Emma was a virgin, and implicitly well on her way to become a spinster.

Will's eyes announced his understandable confusion so Emma felt the need to explain:

"I just haven't found the right person. Somebody who won't reject me because of my… problems"

Emma knew how pathetic that sounded but she hoped it was not cringe worthy pathetic. And true to his nice guy persona, Will just took a second to absorb the information, and then with a resolved tone said:

"It's ok. We'll pop in a movie"

Denial. Not just a natural rapid watercourse in the East African Rift, Emma thought to herself. And she continued to scold herself while Will Smith and that irritating African American person of a diminished height were bantering on the screen in front of them. Will never said another word about the matter, or made any kind of overt gesture, but he didn't have to. Emma knew that's not the way he was planning to spend the evening. Watching a buddy cop flick with a virgin. Probably took him back to his teens.

She regretted not addressing the issue earlier, but when? This was their first actual date. And it wasn't like she could just offer up: "Hey, guess what. I'm a candidate for immaculate conception!" after he surprised her in the hall the other day and kissed her for the first time.

No, this had to be done, as awkward and as embarrassed as she felt, it's good that Will knew what he was getting himself into.

"And besides, I have plenty to offer outside of carnal relations. Better taste in movies for instance", she thought just as Will Smith was nodding his head in sync with a stripper's booted heel that was dangling in his face.

Later that night, Will led Emma to the doorway to kiss her goodbye. The atmosphere was considerably more awkward then when she had arrived a couple of hours before.

"Thank you for being so… understanding." She said breaking the kiss.

"It's ok. If and when we reach that point, I'm sure it will be worth the wait. You are worth the wait."

Her face lit up upon hearing those words. She wanted to tell him that maybe he was the one she had been waiting for all along but decided against it since it would probably sound sappy. She already covered pathetic that night. Why add sappy to the mix? Instead she smiled brightly and kissed him quickly on the lips before disappearing in the hallway.

Later that night

Emma stepped out of the shower and quickly wrapped a towel around her. She stepped in front of the mirror and wiped the steam off of it. Will's words echoed in her ginger head.

"If and when…"

"You are worth the wait"

The "if" was problematic. Didn't he want to have sex with her? But she chose to interpret it as graciousness on Will's part. She didn't have to give up her virginity to him if she didn't want to.

The really problematic part was the "worth the wait" part.

"Let's see what we can work with" she told herself.

She moved over to her bedroom where there was a bigger mirror. Unwrapped the towel, placed it gently on a chair, and covered her eyes with her hands, taking small steps to position herself in front of the mirror. She couldn't just flaunt her nudity around. Not even in front of herself. She had to get adjusted to it. Ergo, hands on eyes

She parted her fingers slightly and peered through her right hand at her reflection. The left eye quickly followed the right in the gawking at herself process. She cocked her head, trying to put a number on her level of attractiveness. That's what kids today did right? Made comments like: "She's a 7", "She's a 10".

If Emma were honest with herself, she wouldn't have given the skinny lady in the mirror any more than a 4. A 5 on a good day. Maaaaybe, 5 and a half if it was right after exfoliation.

Her face was childlike and plain. There was nothing impressive about her breasts other than the fact that they were breast-like in shape. She didn't have a tummy, but she didn't have curves either. She turned around and noted staring at her derriere:

"There is no junk in that trunk. In fact, I can barely make out a trunk."

She contemplated maybe doing some sexy poses but then covered her face again as the sheer silliness of the thought overwhelmed her. She quickly dressed in a nightgown and sat quietly on the bed, feeling that the mirror and the pink elephant behind it were mocking her. Still, she wasn't going to let her own body issues blind her from the fact that Will liked her. He really really liked her. And he wouldn't really really like a 5 woulf he? Why would a guy like Will, who's obviously an 11, get involved with a 5? Makes no sense, sexual or mathematical.

This led to her thinking back to some of the situations in which she felt like Will was clearly attracted to her. She thought back to his brief stint as a janitor when he placed some chalk on her nose and then wiped it gently off.

She approached the mirror again and stared at her nose. Her nose was… adequate. No, scratch adequate. Her nose was ade-cute. It had a dent that just added to its charm.. It was in perfect proportion to her face. No zits, no marks, no skin flakes. Not a pore out of order.

"Yes, she decided triumphantly, my nose is cute. And quite attractive I must say."

Emma wasn't aware of the fact that ne'er had a stripper or porn actress or some other type of sex worker been hired for the shape and size of her nose. But she couldn't have been bothered regardless. She found something to like about her body, as inconsequential as a nose… it was still something.

She went to bed with a smile on her face.

Morning

And woke up startled. She brought her hands to her nose and panted loudly. All night she had horrible nightmares. Of an entire ocean of mucus that was threatening to drown her. And the source of this ocean was a giant waterfall, that flowed from two gigantic nostrils. To her utter dismay, Emma realized that she could never really like her nose. Or anybody else's nose for that matter. Since it was the source of mucus, one of the most disgusting substances known to man.

"Aw nuts…"she cursed and mock-smothered herself with a pillow.