Snow White and the Insufficiently Numbered Dwarves

Disclaimer: I do not own anything that belongs to whoever thought of Snow White and this was a group project, so credit for some of the ideas goes to the bunny and the velociraptor.

Narrator: Once upon a time in a galaxy about ten feet away from the audience, there was a youthfully challenged woman.

Evil Witch: Yes, I am youthfully challenged. However, I am also the most beautiful woman within a two-foot radius.

Bunny: (boing) And I am a Bunny! And you're evil and ugly!

Narrator: That's nice!

Bunny: Snow White's pretty! (boing) And I'm a bunny!

Narrator: Shut up! Anyway... On to the story I was trying to tell. This youthfully challenged woman just happened to be an evil witch. There was also a young maiden named Snowamine White, but her friends called her Snow. The evil witch wanted to kill her because she was insane and Snow White was prettier than she.

Snow White: On no! The evil, youthfully challenged witch is trying to kill me. I have to run away to the woods and meet some numerically challenged men!

Bunny: Good idea! (boing) And I'm a bunny!

Gloomy: We ain't men! We're dwarves.

Preppy: Like, yeah! And we aren't, like, numerically challenged or anything.

Gloomy: Yes, we are...

Preppy: Yeah, whatever...

Narrator: Snow White lived with the dwarves, even though they were insane and one thought that he was a valley girl. Snow white was still afraid of the witch, though.

Bunny: Everyone's insane! (boing) And I'm a bunny!

Snow White: I'm so scared of the wicked witch!

Evil Witch: (poof) You should be afraid! Hahaha. When I find you Snow White, I'm going to kill you... Probably by feeding you a poisoned fruit!

Bunny: Hi, evil, ugly, youthfully challenged woman. (boing) I'm a bunny!

Narrator: After Snow White had been living with the numerically challenged dwarves for a year, she was reintroduced to the Evil Witch.

Evil Witch: Hi, I am the evil witch! Hahaha!

Snow White: Hi, I'm Snow White. Have I met you before because you look familiar?

Evil Witch: I am the evil witch! I am trying to kill you, remember?

Snow White: No, I don't have a good memory.

Evil Witch: Okay, then. I'm your friend and I want to give you a present for your birthday.

Bunny: Woohoo! Party! (boing) I'm a bunny!

Narrator: You're annoying.

Snow White: It's my birthday?

Evil Witch: Sure. What do you like?

Snow White: I like ponies and flowers and chocolates and apples...

Apple: (shuffle) Did you say apples? I'm an apple. The evil witch poisoned me. Do you want to eat me?

Snow White: Sure!

Preppy: Like, no! No!

Gloomy: Don't eat it!

Evil Witch: Eat it!

Bunny: Eat it! No wait! Don't eat it! I mean... (boing) I'm a bunny!

Snow White: (eating noises) Yummy! That was good. (Dies, thud)

Gloomy: Hey, look, she's dead.

Preppy: Oh my gosh! She's, like, dead! Help, 911!

Evil Witch: Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Bunny: Your laugh is really annoying! (boing) And I'm a bunny!

Gloomy: Get the witch!

Preppy: Like, yeah!

Evil Witch: Oh no. (running noises) I have to run away and fall off of this really tall cliff with a velociraptor at the bottom! (Falls) AHHHHH! (thud)

Velociraptor: (grunts/screeches) (eating noises)

Evil Witch: No, not my arm! No, not my leg! Noooooo...

Bunny: Yay! The wicked witch is dead! (boing) And I'm a bunny!

Gloomy: I think we're forgettin' something.

Preppy: Oh, no! Snow White! We must, like, run home to see how she is.

(the dwarves running, door closing as they enter their house)

Snow White: Hi! It turns out the apple was lying! I'm not dead!

Gloomy: Yay!

Preppy: Like, yay!

Bunny: (boing) I'm a bunny!

Velociraptor: (grunts/screeches) (Eating noises)

Bunny: (boing) I'm a Bunny, don't hurt me! AAAAAAAAHHHH! (Limbs being torn off noises)

The End