Disclaimer: I do not own any Harry Potter characters. They all belong to J.K. Rowling.
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Hermione stared at Ron, longing to be the girl he was kissing. As much as it hurt to look at him, she just couldn't bring herself to look away. The fading sunlight was hitting his face just right, giving him a soft angelic glow. Tears started to well behind Hermione's eyes as she watched his lips move with the other girl's. Scrunching up her face in an effort to be strong, Hermione raced from the common room with her books against her chest, slamming the portrait open and racing down the long stairs; she didn't care that it was after hours, she just needed some space.
Her chest heaving with dry sobs, she slumped down in a heap halfway down one of the staircases. Crying heartily, she proceeded to put her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking.
Time seemed to go slowly as she sat, leaning back against the railing of the staircase. Every once in a while the staircase would move but Hermione didn't notice. Her heart was aching so strongly that she felt like it was being ripped out of her. She'd never felt like this before. Why did she feel like this now? Ron was her best friend, not someone she should be in-
What was she going on about anyway? That girl – Lavender Brown, that stupid, horrible, beast of a girl – was so much prettier than Hermione would ever be. After all, she didn't have big bushy hair or ugly brown eyes. How could Ron ever want to kiss a girl with big bushy hair or ugly brown eyes? Sighing, Hermione let the tears roll down her face, noiselessly now.
Suddenly she heard footsteps coming down the stairs but before she could get up to move the person, whoever it was, was standing on the staircase in front of her. The person was in the shadows, the torches having been mostly extinguished. Just as she was about to spin around and run away, the figure stepped forward.
She recognized the red hair and freckles instantly.
"Ron," she breathed before she could stop herself.
"Oh, hullo Hermione," he said, clearing his throat uncomfortably as he pretended not to see Hermione wipe the tears from her face. "Fancy seeing you here. I was just going to the kitchens to get Lavender a-"
Hermione stood up on that note, steeling her eyes – and her heart – against the many emotions that wished to burst forth. Not now, not now, was all she could think.
Ron stopped talking to glance at Hermione curiously. Faking a smile, she looked at his forehead, not quite strong enough to look straight into his eyes. He raised an eyebrow in confusion and Hermione clutched her books tightly to her chest.
"Are you alright, Hermione? You've seemed kind of… off lately." Ron took a step forward and Hermione breathed in his sweet scent, committing it to memory for future days.
"I'm fine," she lied quickly, earning a shrug from Ron. It was silent for a moment, the two of them standing awkwardly. Ron fidgeted uncomfortably.
"Well, I'll be off, then." Ron said, stepping around her to get down the stairs. Hermione hugged the railing, allowing him to get through. She watched him walk away, his ginger hair shining in the torch light, his footsteps echoing across the castle.
A few more tears fell down her cheeks as she watched him walk, going to get his… girlfriend… something to eat. Hermione closed her eyes and took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm herself down.
"You don't deserve him, anyway," she told herself bitterly. "He's better off without you."
With a new determination to be strong, Hermione walked slowly back to the common room, refusing to look at a giggling Lavender Brown as she passed by. Racing up the spiral staircase to the dormitories, she collapsed onto the bed, falling into another fit of tears.
She was still awake when Lavender Brown went to bed that evening, giggling like mad. Hermione cried even more.
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Staring stonily across the grounds to where Lavender Brown was, Hermione completely ignored the book in her lap. She had an essay due for Potions in three days but she wasn't worried about that now. All she could think about was that stupid, thick-headed, prat of a boy!
Realizing what was happening; Hermione glared down at her book and began her essay. And now he's distracting me from what's really important – school!
Sometimes she wished she was a Muggle so that she would've never met that stupid boy and fallen in-
But she hadn't fallen in anything, over anyone, ever! Growling to herself, Hermione forced herself to focus on her ink-blotted essay.
After writing a few words, the sound of her name behind her startled her nearly out of her skin.
"What do you want, Ronald?" Hermione snapped, magically putting the ink back into the toppled container.
"No need to bite my head off, Hermione. I just said hello." Ron walked away toward Lavender, scowling. His mouth curved into a smile the instant Lavender threw her arms around him and started snogging him once again. Hermione looked away quickly; she wanted her lunch to stay in her stomach.
The heartache she had felt last night was once again invading her chest, causing her to grab her things, get up, and go to the library to finish her homework. Being best friends with Ronald Weasley would never be easy, would it?
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"She's perfect," Hermione overheard Ron say in the common room one night. "But how do I tell her?"
She raced away quickly before she overheard anymore… she'd heard what she needed to hear. He loved someone else and that was all she needed to know. Hermione ran to her dorm, slamming and magically locking the door, allowing herself enough privacy to cry peacefully. She always seemed to be crying after seeing Ron.
"I love you, Ronald Weasley," she whispered to herself, rocking on the bed as the tears poured down her cheeks. "Why won't you love me back?"
As Hermione cried herself to sleep that night, Ron talked to Harry about how perfect this girl was. About how perfect Hermione was. And how he couldn't bring himself to tell her.