A/N: Alright. This is really, really crazy, but oh well. I co-wrote this with my good friend Skylark4004 who is AWESOME! Anyways. Please enjoy.
Legolas' Worst. Day. Ever.
"Beep, beep, beep, beep, beeeeeeeep."
Legolas Thranduillon groaned. His clock just had to go off five hours earlier than when it was supposed to.
He was the king's son, why did he have to wake up at 11:00 am? That was for Tauriel and the soldiers. But Him? The alarm clock ought to be groveling on the floor in repentance. Didn't it know who he was?
All he wanted was rest…...and coffee, a dead dwarf, no responsibilities, the crown, perfect hair(which everyone said was a myth, but Legolas had hope!), all the power in Middle earth, to learn the meaning of life, to learn how to get people to praise him(besides his hordes of fangirls), and Tauriel's hand in marriage. That was all he wanted, and "none" of these things ever happened. It wasn't like it was hard.
He caught a glimpse of himself in his vanity mirror and nearly had a heart attack. His hair was standing up on end, pointing in a thousand different directions. (Unbeknownst to him, his laundress had forgotten to put his pillowcase in with the rest of the wash, and faced with one gigantic pillowcase, had absently mindedly used her husband's hair gel for soap. Thus, the crazy hair.) His face wrinkled up in a frown that would give young elves nightmares and he let out a distressed moan.
Legolas's daily pity party began and he threw himself down on his bed in a torrent of sobs.
"This is going to be the best day ever…" he growled.
Then rushed in a servant.
"My lord Legolas," the messenger blurted, "Your father, wishes to see you." He finished all too fast for his breath and collapsed in a heap on the floor. Glancing up at his prince he gasped "My lord, your hair!" and fainted on the spot.
Legolas sighed like a little girl who has finally and successfully made it out of bed… on the wrong side... He quickly maneuvered behind the messenger, then grabbing the elf's arm he pulled him out of his room, like a long blonde-haired lion pulling away a gazelle on the serengeti.
After that he walked back to his chambers. He chose his daily clothes; a pink tunic with flowers on the sleeves, purple and pink polka dot shoes, purple tights, purple, pink, and red striped bow and quiver, and his pink heart shaped sunglasses. To finish, he brushed his hair out and carefully curled it with a curling iron, sticking a huge pink bow in the back for extra effect. He was going out in style.
He came out in S-L-O-W M-O-T-I-O-N. He was the package;)
Eventually he came back to a normal speed.
Suddenly a barrel dropped on his head. It was followed by what felt to be two feet hitting him in the back, sending him to the ground. Legolas sensed his attacker was going for the final blow. Grabbing another barrel the elf/man/dwarf/goblin/orc (he could only see it dimly) slammed it on Legolas.
This almost knocked Legolas out but not fully. Staggeringly, the elf-prince rose. Everything was spinning and swaying. He looked like a drunk elf. He swayed right, he swayed left, he giggled, he sweat, he couldn't think straight, nor could he look straight.
His hair was now tangled from the assault. He looked around but found no trace of his attacker.
From his left he heard a titter. Looking toward the sound, he saw two elleths giggling to each other. Tauriel stood in the background, trying hard to keep a straight face. Legolas leant up against a wall and tried to smile flirtily at them. The two elleths fled. Tauriel simply continued on her rounds, but as Legolas struggled to keep his eyes focused a blurry image moved from a corner and joined his crush. They disappeared together, arm-in-arm. Legolas ground his teeth, and shakily began making his way to his father's throne room.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed! We will be adding pain upon pain to Legolas' day, so please give us suggestions. Anything horrible will work. :)
I'm like an evil maniac. You will be in pain... MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!