Chapter One
Way To Go, Zuzu!
"I have an announcement to make." Charles Ofdensen said, standing before Dethklok. They ignored his presence as usual, and continued chatting in the hot tub. He sighed, hating to be ignored, "The label has made a big decision, I think you boys would be very interested in hearing it."
"No." Nathan grunted, closing his eyes as if that would make Charles disappear, "Just go away, we wanna relax."
Charles glanced over the papers the label had faxed him again, "Well, it concerns your upcoming tour. I really think we should review this now. It would be best to get something like this out of the way as soon as--"
"We don't CARE, Numbers." Murderface spat, slamming his knife into the hot tub's lining, "Why can't you ever just leave us alone and let us be happy? It's always work, work, work with you."
"Yeas." Toki gurgled, his face half submerged under the bubbling water.
Charles sighed and continued anyway, "Well, it seems that the label wants you to choose a band to open for your upcoming tour."
Nathan's eyes grew wide with fury, "What?!"
"Dude, what the hell?" Pickles said, setting down his Mojito drink, "We don't need no kiddie band opening for our shows. We're friggin' Dethklok. "
Charles frowned, he had hoped they wouldn't fuss to much about this, "It would be a good business move for you to have an opening act, it would definitely improve your image. You would also help an up and coming band get noticed." He looked at their uncaring eyes and quickly changed his strategy, "And, you would be doing less work, but still receiving the same pay. " They seemed to ponder this a moment.
"No, I still donts' likes it." Skwisgaar said, the other band members agreed.
Charles shook his head, "These are orders from the label, you will all just have to deal with it." He rolled his eyes as they threw tantrums, disapproving and cursing their recording label, "The label is doing this as a contest, every band that qualifies will be initially screened by the producers, and the top 10 of those will be run by you all so you can make the final choice."
Nathan grumbled, "Well, ok, but we only want the most brutal bands. You tell them that, don't send us any pussies that can't even…like, play, and stuff."
"Of course," Charles said, pretending to care, "I will keep you all updated about the progress of the contest." He left the room, shutting the large gothic door behind him.
"This is totally dildos." Skwisgaar said, angrily playing his guitar.
Murderface slammed his knife down again, "They can't make us do this!"
Pickles thought about it for a moment, then grinned mischievously, "Hey, I got an idea guys. We'll let them stick some kiddie band on us, and we'll pretend to like them, and 'teach' them the ropes. 'n we'll teach them all the things that'll make them suck, so when they go out to perform they'll get booed off the stage and be off our backs."
"Wowie that's brutal Pickle!" Toki chimed.
Nathan slammed his fist onto the water, "Then it's settled! We're gunna show the recording label they can't force anything on us by destroying the opening act."
x - x - x - x - x - x - x
Kyrie sat at her drum set, her eyes starring forward into nothingness. "I can do this…I can do this…" she repeated to herself over and over again. Her hands were shaking, her vision blurred, she couldn't seem to get a grip of herself. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down.
"Come on Zuzu, where's our percussion?" a boy with spiked, dark brown hair demanded. He glared at her with icy blue eyes, tilting his body and guitar in her direction.
She snapped out of her trance, "Sorry Leo!" she quickly caught up with their pace. She glanced up at Leo, who turned back to the microphone and began singing again, and then looked over at Alvin on bass. She felt very out of place in this band. She closed her eyes, focusing back on the music, that was the most important thing right now, that would be her lucky ticket.
"Drowning in a sea of pain
Thoughts of you driving me insane
Don't you know?
Don't you know?
Don't you--GOD, STOP!" Leo shouted.
"What the hell was that Zuzu?" he turned, angrily eyeing the girl again, "You gotta keep up with me and Alvin. I didn't bust my ass sweet talking the producers into letting us perform for Dethklok for you to ruin it with your horrible drumming."
"Aww, come on Leo, don't be so hard on her." Alvin said softly, running his fingers through his messy charcoal colored hair, "She's doing the best she can, maybe we should slow it down a bit for her until she's more used to it."
"No!!" Leo shouted, startling both Kyrie and Alvin, "It has to be perfect, we can't afford to mess this up, it's our only chance with Dethklok."
Alvin rolled his eyes, growing irritated, "Bro, we're not even a metal band, I don't understand why we're even trying out."
"Maybe we can do it!" Kyrie said in a hopeful tone.
"Not with your half-assed drumming." Leo remarked, "You're lucky you're all we could find on such short notice. Now from the top, lets get it right this time!" Kyrie sighed, and Alvin tossed her a sympathetic smile.
"I can do this…I can do this…" she repeated to herself, determined to improve.
x - x - x - x - x - x - x
The sun shined brightly in the sky, casting a happy glow onto the people scattered below. Kyrie looked up at the sky from underneath a large oak tree while Leo and Alvin discussed last minute changes to their performance beside her. Kyrie smiled up at the sky, she had been practicing her drums everyday for hours since Leo had last yelled at her about it. Maybe all her efforts would be enough.
"Pay attention Zuzu!" Leo snapped, she turned her attention to the boys. "Now, I heard the performances today are going to be on live television. LIVE! So don't mess up. Even if we can't get in with Dethklok, at least we can get our names known."
"Yea, yea…" Alvin yawned, "You feel ready for this, Kyrie?"
She smiled brightly, "Yes!"
"We're on in like 20 minutes, so lets get headed to the place." Leo said, standing and dusting off his black jeans and adjusting his black sleeveless shirt. Kyrie looked over at Alvin who adjusted his dark blue jeans and red sleeveless shirt. The entire "sleeveless shirt" ensemble had been Leo's idea, he wanted the band to look balanced. Kyrie followed their lead, adjusting her red tank top and blue jeans, and quickly rewrapping her red bandana. She tightened her short, black pigtails as they advanced towards the check in station.
Kyrie frowned, pushing through the seemingly endless crowd of reporters. She could hear many different languages in the mixture of cultures that came to broadcast the event. "It's so many people!" she shouted over the crowd, hoping that Alvin or Leo could hear her.
"Just the more people to see us rise to fame!" Leo said back to her, "Look! I think I see the place we have to check in at up ahead." Within a few feet they stood before a tall man in all black wearing a hood, Kyrie had read about them before but couldn't quiet remember what they were called. She was relatively new to the entire "Dethklok" thing. She was actually pretty new at playing the drums too. None of that mattered as far as she was concerned, because her research indicated he had joined Dethklok, and maybe all of her efforts would impress him. This was her lucky ticket, she had to make it count. She smiled at the thought of him, feeling warm and fuzzy inside.
"Here's our stage I.D.'s, totally authentic!" Leo flashed them to the guard who checked their names off the list.
"You're the last band." the man said, "Follow the arrows, they will lead you to the stage. Wait your turn."
Kyrie looked up at the hooded man. "Roadie!" she said, remembering the mans title. She quickly covered her mouth as if saying that may have offended him, the man merely ignored her.
"Kyrie?" Alvin called back to her, she ran to catch up. The trio walked through a small hallway in single file, Leo leading the way. The hall was pitch black, the only thing which seemed to guide them was the sound of music growing louder. After a few more minutes, they finally reached the end of the hall, and ascended up a small flight of stairs.
"Thank you for uhm, your performance Fated Death Misery Express." A deep voice said from ahead of them.
Another voice added, "Thank yous for being am, us, here playing."
Kyrie was puzzled by the sentence, and eagerly looked up the steps, they were closer to the top. Bright stage lights seemed to blind her for a moment, and she wondered why there were so many lights. "It's brighter in here than outside…" she mumbled to herself as she reached the top of the steps.
"This is it man!" Leo said excitedly. Kyrie peeked around them, trying to catch a glimpse of Dethklok. All she could see was the tops of their heads, brown, red, black, blond, brown.
"What the hell is he doing here…?" Alvin whispered to Leo. Kyrie turned her attention to the four people approaching them, assuming they were the band that had just performed.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't the Barbed LOSERS." A boy with dirty blond hair said from the opposing group. The rest of his group laughed.
"Haha Pan, go fuck yourself." Leo spat. The two bands stood, sizing each other up. Kyrie frowned, feeling insignificant in this group of older, musically wise boys.
"Barbed Brothers." Alvin said smoothly, "Don't tell me after all this time you still can't get the band name right."
Pan laughed, "Whatever. You all just take a good look at all this here, this is the closest you losers will ever be to the big time. Me and my band have this contest already won."
"We'll see about that." Alvin said in a harsh, low tone.
Leo simply laughed at the statement, "If you're just as shitty of a drummer as you were for our band then you can forget it."
Pan grinned, "I can do a lot better than you losers, why do you think I left?" He and his band walked around the three, "Oh, and this is what you got to replace me? Some skinny little girl? I bet she can't even play drums."
"I can too!" Kyrie shouted angrily.
He laughed again, "You can't even tie your shoes." She looked down at her red and white Adidas tennis shoes and growled, kneeling to quickly tie them.
"Barbed Brothers please report to the stage." the loudspeaker shouted. Both Alvin and Leo rushed to get set up while Kyrie hurried to tie her shoes, trying to ignore the other band as they walked away laughing and making jokes. She cursed them under her breath, she could play drums, she would show them all.
"Zuzu come on!" Leo shouted, "We need you on drums now!"
She fretted with her shoes a few moments longer, and then gave up, rushing to the stage. Her eyes went wide as she felt her foot get caught on something, and her body thrown forward. She tripped on a cord, accidentally yanking it. The cord tripped a Roadie who was patrolling the stage area, causing him to fall back onto a pulley. The pulley began to spin some, loosening a large lighting fixture on the ceiling.
Kyrie looked over at Dethklok, which was in full sight of her tripping, and felt her cheeks grow red with embarrassment. The few news reporters who had been permitted to record the contest began laughing. She could hear Leo mumble something under his breath about "useless" and "pathetic", and her eyes began to swell with tears.
"What a loser!!" Pan shouted, his entire band stopping to mock her again. Suddenly a loud snapping sound echoed through the auditorium, and Kyrie turned and watched in horror as the loosened lighting fixture crashed down onto the laughing Fated Death Misery Express band. The impact splattered blood everywhere.
"Oh my…" Alvin gasped, he and Leo starred at the bloody mess, and then looked at Kyrie who was covered in blood.
"DID YOU SEE THAT?" Kyrie looked over at Dethklok, which seemed more amazed than horrified by the incident. "That was the most brutal thing I've seen today." The lead singer said.
"Dude, they're hired." She looked over at the red haired drummer, "Forget the rest of the bands, that tops everything we seen in brutality."
Her eyes wandered over to the blond, who seemed to smile angelically at her, "Yea, lets signs' them up." He said. She felt her heart flutter, it was him.
"Are you serious?!" Leo asked excitedly, "We're in, that's it?!"
Alvin adjusted his glasses, "You don't even want to hear us play?"
"Shut up!" Leo jabbed him in the stomach with his elbow, "This is great! This is so fucking awesome!! Way to go Zuzu!!"
Kyrie sat, feeling a bit dazed and confused. How was killing a rival band a good thing? How did that automatically grant them the right to be the opening act for Dethklok? Could this really be happening? She looked down at her jeans, noticing for the first time she was covered in blood. Her mind began racing, she felt sick to her stomach, and fell back onto the stage, unconscious.