Carlisle's POV

From Carlisle's Journal

Nothing has been the same. No one is happy, and there is no joy in my house since the day we left Forks. Since the day we left Bella behind.

Edward left us almost immediately. He only checks in every month or so, and we have no idea where he is. Esme is despondent. She feels the loss of two of her children so deeply. Her heart is truly broken. Jasper is awash in guilt. No one can convince him that it's not completely his fault that Edward started this...travesty. He spends hours sitting, gazing out at the forest here in Alaska, grief rolling off of him in waves. Alice can't help him. Her sparkle is gone. She's feeling the loss of her brother and her best friend. Where once she danced across a room, she now almost plods. Edward made her swear not to look for Bella. She loves her brother so, she forces herself to comply. Emmett hasn't pulled a prank or told a stupid joke in months. And Rosalie... Rosalie is permanently angry. Emmett took her on vacation, to ease the strain on everyone. He comes off as a buffoon, but my large son is very sensitive.

This cannot continue, but I am at a loss as to how to fix it. I think only Edward can, but we don't know how to get through to him. He won't answer his phone. I can't imagine trying to survive without Esme, without my mate. How is he managing? The pain must be monstrous.

And me? My silent heart aches. My daughter, my sweet Bella, is beyond my reach. We promised Edward that we would stay out of her life. I rue the day I made that vow, but I must keep it, for the sanity of my eldest son. Edward! Come home! Your family is falling apart!

I closed my journal, and dropped my head into my hands. I was at a total loss. Just a few months ago, I had such joy. My son had found his mate. After so many years of loneliness, he had someone to share his existence with. And then Bella's birthday party. I cursed that day. I shook my head; no... if it hadn't been that incident, it would have been another. Edward was so filled with self-loathing. He had never felt he was worthy of her love, of any of our love. I was so very afraid for Bella. I knew theirs was a mate bond. You don't move on from that. Ever.

Just as I got to my feet to leave my office, a cry rang through the house. Alice! In seconds I was down the stairs, to see Esme crouching next to Alice's small form, crumpled on the floor. Her dry sobs struck terror into my heart.

"Alice! Darling, what is it? What have you seen?" Esme cried, picking her daughter up to cradle her in her arms.

Alice wept dryly, "Bella! Oh no, no, no! Bella, WHY?"

Jasper pulled her into his own embrace, "What is it? Darlin', you have to tell us!"

Alice curled into Jasper's arms, "Bella...Bella's dead! She threw herself off a cliff! Why would she do that?"

Esme was instantly in my arms, her own sobs muffled against my chest. My face was frozen with shock. Oh no. Oh my dearest daughter. I knew it was for me to bear responsibility for this horror. I knew leaving her behind was a mistake, and yet I made the promise to abandon her. And now it was too late to make amends. Oh, my sweet, fragile Bella. My poor, broken Edward. I was terrified for him.

Alice raised her head, "Charlie. Oh, poor Charlie! I need to go to him, dad. He's going to be destroyed..."

"Of course you must. Take the Mercedes. I filled it last night," I nodded.

Jasper looked at me, "I should go too." But Alice shook her head. "No, Jazz. I need to do this on my own. I abandoned her as well. This is mine to deal with." Jasper nodded once, shortly. "You'll call?"

"Of course." She pressed a kiss to his lips. "I'll be back as soon as I can, you know that." Jasper nodded again.

Alice ran upstairs to pack a bag, and within minutes was hugging us all, and she was gone. I called Emmett's cell, to pass on the news, and to ask them to come home. We needed our whole family together. As many of them as we could gather, that is.

XXX

Time passed slower than I thought possible. We decided to hunt that night, to distract ourselves as much as possible. We knew it would take at least a day for Alice to arrive in Forks, and who knows how long for her to help Charlie, however she could. The next day, we all sat in the living room, tense, waiting. My phone never left my hand. When it rang, it still startled me. "Alice!"

"Carlisle! Bella is alive! But-" Alice cried into the phone.

I turned to my family, "Bella is alive? But how-?" Esme rushed to my side, joy lighting her eyes. I could see her lips part, to flood me with questions. I held up my hand.

Alice cut me off, "One of the Quileute boys pulled her out of the water. She's fine, if a bit thin. But it's Edward... dad, it's not good. Rosalie called Edward, and for once, he answered. She told him that Bella was dead, and he's now on his way to Volterra. He wants to die too!"

"What? Rosalie? But why?" Esme looked at me questioningly. I shook my head and mouthed, 'wait'.

"Because she's hateful? I don't know, Carlisle. Bella and I are on our way to the airport. We're going to try to stop him. I called his phone, but a stranger answered. It appears he tossed his phone into a trash bin after talking to Rosalie. Well, after calling the Swan house, and being told that Charlie was at a funeral! He didn't ask whose funeral. It's Harry Clearwater's, by the way. Heart attack. Anyway, he assumed it was Bella's funeral. I swear, we'll do all we can. I'll call you when we have anything to report."

I breathed deeply, "Godspeed, my dear. Stay safe, both of you." I clicked off the phone. "Bella is alive. I don't know how Alice didn't see that, but she's alive, and well. But Edward is on his way to provoke the Vulturi into destroying him." Esme cried out in pain. I pulled her close and said, "The girls are on their way to intercept him. We can only wait now, and pray that they make it in time." I exchanged a look with Jasper. Stark fear filled his eyes. I was terrified as well, but for my family's sake, I couldn't afford to show it.

XXX

Later that day, Rosalie and Emmett arrived home. We had relayed all of the new information to them. Emmett had wanted to divert to Italy, but Esme had begged him to come to Alaska. I understood; she already had three of her children racing toward The Volturi. She was close to breaking.

Emmett walked straight to Esme, enfolding her in a hug.

Rosalie walked slowly into the room, her chin nearly touching her chest. "I'm...I'm sorry. I thought that if he knew, he would just come home. I didn't think- I never-"

Esme walked to her and embraced her as well. "I know," Esme breathed. "We all miss him. But you need to come to grips with the fact that Bella is his mate. He can't live without her. It's the same as for you and Emmett. They belong together." Rosalie nodded, then put her face in Esme's neck and cried tearlessly. "Let's just hope they're in time." Esme closed her eyes, "Please, God."

XXX

After another interminable wait, my phone rang once more. Alice was speaking so rapidly and quietly that only vampire hearing could have picked it up. She, Bella and Edward were safe. They were on the plane, heading home. She'd fill everyone in when they arrived, but we needed to be warned; The Volturi expected Bella to be changed, soon, and they would be checking.

I closed my eyes and sighed in relief. I handed the phone to Jasper, and told the rest of the family the good news. Esme's eyes glowed, Jasper began to breathe again, and Rosalie was so obviously relieved. She buried her face in Emmett's chest, and wept. My daughter had much to atone for, but that was between her, Bella and Edward.

I walked up the stairs at a human pace, to the end of the hall. I reached up, placed my hand on the smooth wood of my father's cross, and murmured, "Thank you."