Chapter one

EPOV

There has never been anyone more beautiful than her, the one person I cannot have. My mother's best friend and boy do I want her, badly!

I have known Bella all my life. She was there when I was born, she was there for my baptism, and she was there for all my minor and major milestones. My mother Rose and Bella have been best friends since high school.

When they first met they didn't really get along, but hung out together through mutual friends. They got along well enough to be able to hang out with their mates for social events such as movies, going to first beach etc.

Their friendship changed after my mother found out she was pregnant with me. All their so called friends dropped my mother like she was something that you wiped from the bottom of your shoe. Not Bella though, she stood by my mother through all the name calling and segregation a pregnant teenager would face from her peers. Bella even got called names and was excluded from any activities the group was doing.

I think what hurt mum the most was that my biological father Royce King didn't even want anything to do with her or me. He would say things like she was trying to trap him into marriage or that she cheated and she was nothing but a slut. My mother had such a hard time after the way Royce treated her trusting men. So much so that when forks newest police officer Emmett Cullen asked my mother to date him she refused. It took months for Emmett to convince her to go out to dinner and from there he slowly earned my mother's trust.

Bella of course was my mother's maid of honour at their wedding. Even then I thought Bella was beautiful. Admittedly I was only seven but that didn't change the fact that Bella is gorgeous.

As I got older and hit puberty I started to have these tingly feelings whenever I would see Bella. The feelings got stronger when the closer she was or if I touched her. In my dreams at night Bella was the star. I know it seems wrong but I couldn't help visualising Bella in my "special time".

Everyone thought it was cute that I had a crush on Bella, since I would do nice things like pull her chair out for her, open the door and get her food and drink. My parents thought it was a phase I was going through and would soon enough get over it.

When I was fourteen Bella got married to a guy named Mike. I was devastated. I didn't like him one bit. He was load and obnoxious and when no one was looking he was mean to me. Because Bella seemed so happy I never said anything about Mike's behaviour towards me until Emmett caught him calling me a sissy boy as he shoved me. Emmett made sure Mike never even looked at me again. I asked Emmett to keep the Mike incident a secret from mum and Bella because I cared too much for Bella that I didn't want her feelings to be hurt.

A year later Bella and Mike welcomed their baby girl Tanya into the world. Bella loved that baby like nothing else. We all thought Mike felt the same, how wrong were we. Tanya was a little over a year old when she became really sick. She had caught whooping cough and Bella had to take her to the hospital. Bella spent hours trying to contact Mike to let him know what had happened but he wasn't answering his phone.

By the time Tanya was admitted to the children's ward my mother and I offered to sit with Tanya while she went down to the shop to see Mike and tell him Tanya was in hospital. When she got there, she went straight to the manager's office where she knew he would be. Opening the door to the office she got an eyeful of the reason why Mike wasn't answering his phone. There was Mike and one of the store clerks Jessica on his desk playing hide the salami.

Needless to say that was the end of their marriage. Mike in the divorce signed over his parental rights stating that he never wanted to be a father and since the pregnancy was accidental he just went along with it to keep Bella happy. In the end he said he resented Bella and Tanya for holding him back and that Jessica understood him better than Bella could ever have.

Bella was devastated moving out of the home she shared with Mike and came and stayed with us for six months while she got herself together and had a new home to move her and Tanya into. I was glad that I was a lot better at hiding my "crush" by then, so good that no one suspected that I still had feelings for Bella.

When I was seventeen I decided that I would have to put my feelings for Bella to the side. I mean why would someone as beautiful as Bella be interested in someone like me? After all I am her best friend's son. I started dating girls my own age, but it did nothing to dampen my feelings. I kept dating girls to keep my mum happy as she was worried about me. Mum even had Emmett have a man to man talk letting me know that it was okay if I was gay. I told them I was not gay and that I liked girls not boys. My friend Alistair got a kick out of that. Alistair my very gay friend started offering to set me up with guys as a joke, even to this day he still occasionally asks me to double date with his boyfriend James.

When I went off to collage I met Heidi. She was beautiful, not as beautiful as Bella, but beautiful none the less. She was a little older than me, by seven years. She started collage later as a mature age student. She had told me she was set to go to college straight after high school but then her mother got sick and her father needed someone to help care for her while he worked. Heidi loved her parents so much that she put off continuing her education stating that they sacrificed for her it was now her time to sacrifice for them. Once her mother became well enough Heidi's parents encouraged her to continue her education.

It was with Heidi that I lost my virginity. After a night out on the town we headed back to Heidi's apartment where we had a few drinks. Then one thing led to another and before I knew it I was in a sexual relationship with Heidi.

My mother almost lost her shit when I brought Heidi home one weekend. Bella had to drag her into the back yard to get her to cool off. After a couple of hours out on the patio talking my mother finely came around, even though she still didn't like the idea of me dating someone so much older than me, she said that she would support me whatever choices I made.

Heidi and I continued to date for a couple of years but we started to move away from each other and eventually Heidi called it quits on the relationship. Last I heard she was married to a bouncer named Felix. Since Heidi there have been two other girls or women should I say as both were much older than me. There was Kate who was eight years older than me and Carmen who was four years older. Neither impressed my mother but she always kept quiet on her displeasure of my choice in women.

I was going home for the summer and was excited to see my parents. My work load had increased at school so I hadn't been able to get home to see them for a long time. I was lucky that I stayed with my adopted grandparents (Emmett's mother and father) while I was studying. It took a lot of the strain off of having to work to cover rent. I always made sure to do the yard work and help tidy the house as my way of saying thank you.

When I arrived home Emmett was the only one there.

"Hi pops, where is mum?" I asked

"Your mother and Bella have just gone to the shop to pick up some stuff for the BBQ tomorrow. How was your drive home?"

"Good, it was pretty quiet on the roads."

We chatted for a while longer about what was happening at UW and how Esme and Carlisle were before I put my bags away.

My bags were unpacked so I decided to have a shower to wash the grime off from travelling. With my towel wrapped around my waist I sat on the edge of my bed before lying my head on my pillows. I closed my eyes, they were sore and tired and before I knew it I was asleep.