Note: This is unedited and based on a combination of my insomnia, twitter ramblings and my idea of where this all could lead. It might not be to your taste, but that's okay too :)

Reviews are eskimo kisses.

All I Ever Wanted

All she knew was that everyone had a choice, or choices; everyone had an array of options presented to them. Defining moments that would differentiate between what they were and what they weren't. Freedom was who you chose to be, what you chose to do, whichever path you decided to plant your feet on.

Yet now, she wasn't quite so sure anymore. She had given Damon a choice; she'd presented him with the opportunity to divvy up between what was 'right' and what was 'wrong'. What was 'good' and what was 'bad'. She knew that in doing this, she'd given him what the world had failed to; she'd given him himself. She'd given him the cure, in the hopes that whatever course he chose to take, that he'd do it for himself; that he'd recognise her faith in him. Her unwavering trust. Except now, she wasn't so sure any of that mattered anymore. Wasn't it bad enough that her mother had built a family outside of her, outside of her existence? Damon's mother's reaction was much the same; she'd found a family in 1903 – she'd found a home and a world of her own, an existence that thrived outside of him and Stefan. An existence that, to be entirely frank, would continue its course, with or without their presence; as it had for almost a hundred years. Bonnie closed her eyes at the parallel that ran between her and Damon, one of many if she was honest with herself.

No, that wasn't enough. Now Bonnie's hands were tied and she had to return to 1903 to give Lily her family back. She'd been in hysterics since her arrival to the present day; refusing to in any way cooperate or acclimate. Lily longed for what she knew, what Damon could never give her. She longed for her life back in literal damnation; Bonnie could see it in her eyes. The minute Lily returned with them she'd begun plotting for the others to join her. The other rippers, other souls bound in purgatory, bound in the hell of their thirst. Her family. Bonnie couldn't look at Damon anymore, couldn't bare him asking her to do something he didn't even think to be the right thing to do. Elena's voice hovered somewhere behind Bonnie; and the witch was sure that her friend was trying to be supportive but all Bonnie felt was a detached annoyance at the prospect of having another variable in the equation. She had too much to think about, too many things that could go wrong that she had to be prepared for.

When they arrived in 1903 Lily flashed away to the bungalow where Bonnie'd initially made her discovery of another parallel universe. Damon remained quiet as he and Bonnie followed begrudgingly after Elena's hurried footsteps. Elena's head snapped to the left and she flashed away. Damon sighed and grabbed at Bonnie, rushing after his girlfriend. Bonnie clung to him, purely out of surprise – his proximity was nothing new to her. When they arrived Bonnie reeled back and gasped. Kai and the Others were conversing with Lily, almost conspiratorially. Something wasn't right. A gust of wind passed over Bonnie, lifting her scent and sending it flurrying over the Others along with the spatters of snow. A chorus of gasps and hisses ensued as the Rippers caught Bonnie's scent and all their heads snapped in her direction as she latched onto Damon who did his best to hide her from sight.

"There she is!" Kai called out with a bright, sharp smile. "Bonnie…I knew you'd come back for me." She couldn't even think of a response through the lead-like fear that had filled her bones. All the Other's eyes had bled into a violent red-black and their fangs only emphasised their want for her blood. "Oh no, no, no," Kai tisked playfully, "No one gets to hurt Bon-Bon, she's our only way out of here – our meal ticket if you will." He shared a giddy smile with one of the men as the Others finally caught on.

"We're not here for you Kai." Elena spoke up, her bravado hollow and misguided. The look he sent her in response proved as much. Damon's body was tense as he dipped into a defensive stance in front of Bonnie.

"Any one of you lay a hand on her and I promise you, it will be the last thing you do." The elder Salvatore spat. Lily's face was annoyed.

"Aren't you sick of all this yet Damon?" Kai pressed, "You know none of us will hurt her, we need her." Damon growled as Bonnie's grip on his one arm tightened.

"I mean ever." Damon clarified. Kai grinned.

"You don't seem to care much for the rest of the world." One of the Others observed. Bonnie gulped.

"You would be correct." Damon's smile was tight. Kai nodded as he crossed his arms.

"Fascinating isn't it?" Kai said as his eyes sought Bonnie out, ducking his head and beaming at her when she scowled at him, "His love of the witch." Elena frowned and her eyes darted back to the duo as Bonnie's heart beat tripled. "Getting out of my prison world I tested her love of him and I wasn't disappointed…well, not until she got one over on me," the edge in his voice gave Bonnie goosebumps, "And now it seems that his love of her is being tested. How peculiar the Universe can be."

"Shut up before I rip your mouth off your face." Damon snarled. Kai raised his hands with a chuckle.

"We need to leave." Lily said, "And Kai comes with us."

"Out of the question!" Damon snapped. Lily's face hardened.

"He's promised to help our coven acclimate." Bonnie's teeth gnashed together, of course he had. "We need him."

"No," Elena interjected, "What you need is to leave him behind, here, where he belongs." Lily's face turned to stone as she locked eyes together.

"These prison worlds are hell, no one deserves to be condemned here, and you should know better than to suggest something like that to people who have been stuck here for decades." Elena's mouth clamped shut. "Especially when this person is our ally."

"He is not your ally." Bonnie called out to Lily, redirecting the vampire's attention. "He cannot be trusted."

"By you perhaps," The woman agreed, her blue eyes, so like Damon's, cold and unwavering, held her gaze, "But we are older, wiser…more determined."

"With all due respect," Bonnie said, straightening up and stepping around Damon only to have him grab her arm and keep her close to him, "You're being impulsive and reckless." Bonnie shook her head, "He betrayed me before I'd even considered the thought of seeing good in him…he's a psychopath." Kai's face puckered at her words, his chest tightening at the sight of her as she spoke to Lily. "You need to leave him here."

"No," Lily's voice was hard, "He leaves with us and you take me and my family home like you promised." Bonnie's eyes began to burn for some reason, the dread she'd felt since the start of all this building to an uncomfortable level as she looked up at Damon. Finally looked at him. Their expressions were similar; pained and disappointed and above that…helpless.

"Fine." Bonnie said as she turned her eyes back to the group of people before her; Rippers and Siphon… "Let's go."

Two Days Later

"One move Damon," Kai said, "And Bonnie gets it." Damon spared a momentary glance at Elena who was unconscious on the floor. Bonnie wriggled against his hold around her throat as her eyes begged Damon to leave, to find his mother and put an end to all the bloodshed that had followed her return with her beloved 'family'.

"Why are you doing this Kai?" Damon asked between heaving breaths.

"Because if I can't have her, what on Earth makes you think you can?" Kai's expression was murderous, "We're the same Damon, we kill, we take, we infect…she deserves more than that, from both of us and we'll never be able to give that to her, you realise that right?" Damon's jaw clenched, Kai grinned, "That's it isn't Damon? You know I'm right. That's your weakness; how aware you are of your unworthiness of anything good this world has to offer…just like me. That's why I take, that's why I am the way I am…same for you. And neither of us will ever stop." Bonnie gasped and cried out as a knife slid into her abdomen from behind as Kai pierced her flesh. "What a shame she had to choose you to love, huh?"

"Enough!" Damon screamed, "Stop! Whatever you want, take it, I don't care." Kai paused and Bonnie whimpered as the blade was removed. Blood spread over her shirt, the smell of it permeating the room and bringing forth an unprecedented fury in Damon's eyes.

"I want you two to suffer, just like I have." Kai said simply, "That's all." Damon's pressed his eyes shut in defeat. His mother was on a rampage; his brother was dead to the world along with his not-quite girlfriend. Elena was helplessly flailing between denial and unconsciousness while the rest of Mystic Falls hightailed it to the nearest highway, leading out of this hell hole.

"Damon, go." Bonnie spluttered for the umpteenth time, "Save them."

"Save who, Bonnie?" Damon roared, "Everyone else is gone, dead or irrelevant. You're the one I need to be with." Her eyelids fluttered as the blood loss began to kick in.

"No." She took a shuddering breath, "I need you safe, you have to go."

"Yeah, Damon," Kai added in, "Go, remind her how utterly selfish you can be." Kai began to laugh, "Take your epic Elena and flee, have your happy ever after. Leave Bon-Bon with me." He pecked her temple and she hissed in anger. "I'll take good care of her."

"Like hell." Damon barely felt the words rush out of him before his vision was consumed by a blinding film of crimson, the last sound he recognised was Bonnie's scream and it finally sent him over the edge…

Moments later, with a shaking but breathing witch in his arms, Damon blinked into coherency and looked down at the two of them. They were covered in blood, Kai's blood. His head still rolling away from them. Bonnie was trying desperately to get a decent amount of air into her starved lungs but the adrenaline wouldn't let her steady herself. "I'm here." Damon said, "I'm here. You're fine. He's gone." She cried in earnest then, her body spasming with aftershocks of fear.

"It's not over." She reminded him. "It's not over and I don't think we're going to make it." Damon drew in a breath and looked around them, Elena was still passed out.

"We always make it Bonnie, you know that. Me and you? We survive." He tore into his wrist and poured blood into her mouth. "We're ending this, and we're ending this now."

The streets were flooded with blood and mayhem. Screams cut through the howling wind that swept up the scent of blood and dirt. Damon and Bonnie were rushing through it all, trying to find the eye of the storm. A body flew past them and Damon flashed away and was back next to Bonnie before she could blink. The head of one of the Others spun off into the distance, the man's eyes having been closed as he revelled in the high of his bloodlust.

"Almost there, almost there." Damon muttered over and over and Bonnie's eyes shone with ever present tears as the weight of their situation pressed down on her for the umpteenth time. She knew where this was all headed, she just hoped that when it came down to it, it ended the way it should – whatever the hell that meant. "Almost there, we're almost there." Bonnie's breathing hiccupped as she scanned the open field with wild eyes. She had so many memories in this town, this park to be more specific. Evening town gatherings, celebrations, the death of her father…Her eyes pressed closed as she drew a long breath through her nose. "Stay with me Bonnie." Damon's voice reopened her eyes and she tightened her hold on his hand as they hurried through the littered streets.

"Incendia!" Bonnie yelled, her arm aimed at two of the Others as they fed from a screaming woman…Mrs Hollard who lived next door to Matty…God she hoped Matt was safe, she couldn't bear it, not even the thought of losing another person she loved. But she had to be strong, she had to keep up with Damon – they had to end this.

"My fault." His words were nothing but a rushed breath but she heard him all the same, she knew he was blaming himself for it all. He hadn't thought beyond getting his mother back and now all of Mystic Falls was paying the price. "My fault."

"Not true." Bonnie huffed as she skittered around a wayward leg that was clearly ripped off of some poor man. "That's not true Damon and I won't argue with you on this, not now, not ever." He didn't say anything but looking up at him she saw his taught jawline and his crazed eyes.

"They're here." Damon hissed and pulled her to his side as they rounded a corner to enter the parking lot behind the newly refurbished Grille. Bonnie swallowed heavily and nodded her head, her eyes locked on the remaining three Others – Damon's mother included. "…Bonnie." his voice broke as it framed her name, "No matter what, I'm going to make sure you live, okay. I just need you to trust me." He wasn't even looking at her as he spoke, his eyes trained on his mother and the poor soul whose life was dwindling in her hands. His hushed words coursed through Bonnie as she trailed her eyes over his face.

"Always." She replied and looked ahead, missing his glance down at her. When he raised his head he locked eyes with the two people with his mother, aiming for them first, while Bonnie engulfed the immediate area in flames.

"You don't have it in you." Lily spat, dribbles of blood lining her mouth and words. "You're just like me when I lived, weak, miserable." She swallowed and began to laugh, "Your father was always the one who did the hard work, always made sure that my hands stayed clean…oh if he could see me now." She seemed delirious as she rode out her high. Damon's heart shattered to a thousand pieces. "What did you think would happen Damon? You were never supposed to find me, I was never supposed to be freed, but you found me and you freed me and you gave my family and I something we yearned for longer than normal people care to live."

"You're my family!" Damon cried out, his voice hoarse with emotion, "Mine, you were supposed to love me, wait for me!" Forcing the tears back he glared at her, "I know in there somewhere you love me and I know you're still my mother." She looked at him sadly.

"Damon, your mother is long dead." Lily's voice was soft and sweet as it sent the sharp shot of pain straight through his chest. "And for that I am sorry, but you killed my family…I, I, I don't think I could ever forgive you for that."

"What like I could never forgive you for abandoning me when I needed you, bringing these…these monsters with you and ruining the closest thing I've had to home since you died…Mother I could never forgive you for that." Lily's smile was cold. "How could you do this?"

"Please," Lily said as her eyes flitted to Bonnie, "You can hardly cast judgement when you yourself have lived a lie of your own construction. You don't love Elena, you and Stefan hardly see eye to eye on the simplest things…he didn't even know I was alive, or back," Lily shook her head angrily, "You have no right to judge me when you can't even own up to your own truths."

"You don't know me," Damon spat, "You don't even know who you are anymore…you're emotions are off –"

"And they're never coming back on –"

"I thought you would have wanted your son back, Stefan…as he was –"

"He made the right choice –"

"How can you say that?!"

"We're DAMNED Damon, this is who we are…days like these," her eyes roamed around before settling on Bonnie, "people like her," she smiled when she looked back at Damon, "They don't matter. None of this does. Their lives are so short that there's no point indulging in these delusions of yours, one day she'll be nothing but a memory…a figment of your imagination and how is that healthy for us? There's no point to this love…"

"You're wrong," Damon's smile was sad as his eyes blurred with tears, "Loving her…knowing her, is one of the best things that has ever happened to me and no amount of pain or time could ever make me regret that." Bonnie's heart galumphed in her chest. Did he just…? "What matters is how this, how existing makes us feel…that's all that keeps us whole…breezing through it, not letting any of it touch you…why live at all?" Lily's face darkened.

"Excellent question." In a flash she made for Bonnie, fangs bared, curled hair streaking out behind her as her arms clawed at the shortening space between her and the witch. With a pained roar Damon intercepted her, his fist shooting through her chest. Bonnie gasped as she stumbled backwards, Lily barely having reached her. Bonnie watched as Damon staggered to his feet, his mother's withered heart falling from his palm.

"Damon…Oh my god." Bonnie lamented as she made for him, but when his eyes met hers her feet faltered, "I'm, I, I'm so – sorry, I –" In a flash he had her within the circle of his steel arms and their tears were quiet as they fell in the dead night.

The next day

Stefan was back, bringing Caroline with him. Elena came to as well…eventually. They all found Bonnie and Damon sitting side by side quietly on the couch. Initially the vampire trio stepped into the den of the Boarding House and did a tally of the damage the building had been exposed to. As Stefan rounded the couch his eyebrows flew heavenward. Bonnie and Damon were hand in hand, staring at the empty fireplace. But that wasn't all. Damon's heart was beating – slowly but steadily.

"…Damon?" Stefan's mouth felt dry and his world was tilting and falling in on itself. Damon had called and told him his mother was dead…again… "Damon, it's me."

"I can hear you." Damon muttered. Bonnie blinked slowly and then leaned into him. Elena ad Caroline came to hover over them as they stood next to Stefan.

"Do you have a –"

"Heartbeat?" Damon provided, "Yes brother, as a matter of fact I do." His eyes lifted up then and locked with the three of them while Bonnie sighed and took in a ragged breath. "I took the cure Bonnie gave me." Elena's eyes bulged while Caroline's mouth plopped open.

"She – Bonnie gave, you, wait, what?" Elena stammered.

"She gave me the cure and I took it, it's what I wanted."

"Damon…" Elena couldn't hide the hurt in her voice and it caused his gaze to zero in on her.

"I don't want forever Elena, not with you, not with my brother, not even with myself…I've had enough…this is my choice and I'm sticking to it." Elena's heart broke, she hadn't even registered Bonnie really, never mind the way he was gripping her hand in his. "Respect my choice." He looked down at Bonnie then before lifting his gaze up to his brother. "We're leaving."

"We?" Stefan echoed.

"Bonnie and I."

"Where?

"Why?"

"No!" The last was Elena.

"Yes." Damon's voice was hard and icy. "You can't stop us. We need to leave, in fact, I suggest you do the same."

"…Bonnie?" This was from Caroline, the witch looked up as she heard the pain riddling the blonde's words.

"I'm sorry." Was all Bonnie could say as she began sobbing again. "I can't be here anymore."

"So we're not going to talk about any of it?" Elena interrupted, "Not the cure, not Damon taking it, not what happened last night, not what's been happening between the two of you, I mean –"

"Elena this isn't about you." Bonnie said quietly.

"And it hasn't been for a while now, I know there are ways we could have handled this better but, last night I made a choice, a few choices and…the common denominator was Bonnie. She's my middle ground. She makes sense to me, for me…and she didn't even make me choose to begin with…I don't want forever…And I don't want it…With her." Elena looked down at her best friend as her undead heart broke, she couldn't help the confusion, the anger, the pain. "Don't look at her like that." Damon called to Elena, "We have no one to blame but ourselves for what happened between us. None of this makes sense, none of it ever has, but the closer to peace I've ever gotten was with her and I'm going to fight tooth and nail to hang onto that." The silence swallowed all five of them as they processed his words. After a while he cleared his throat he stood to his feet and lifted Bonnie with him. "We'll call you."

"No matter what, I love you guys." Bonnie said, smiling as best as she could, "Don't forget that."

"Yeah," Damon said as he wound his hand around her waist, "Ditto on that." The three vampires watched as they left. After the sound of Damon's Camaro had long faded into the distance Caroline looked between Stefan and Elena and the state the Boarding House was in.

"So what the hell happens now?"