*Okay, I really don't need to start a new story, but I am. lol. I
don't know if i'm interpreting this song right or not, but I like it, and
think I am. lol. E/D. Donna's POV. Okay, so review me, kay? 3, *ChELL*
Disclaimer- I do not own Donna, Eric or any other characters from that 70's show (but damn that'd be awesome. lol) I also do not own the song "Lonley Girl". It belongs to the very talented artist known as Pink. :)
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:.chapter 1.:
Oh God. Oh God. I don't know why I have these thoughts. I'm just normal, right? I'm a normal person. I've never really had thoughts like this.
I've had a good life, nothing too traumatic's happened. I mean, the stuff with my mom of course, but it wasn't anything serious. It's not like she was dying. Ya know?
I push the pill to the back of my throat, get a bottle of water, and take it down. Taking more, one after the other, until I'd took almost seven. Intentionally, of course. I'm doing this, everytime I do this, I take one more, gradually killing myself.
It's not that I want to kill myself. I just want to hurt myself, shake things up a little, just get attention, really. I'm being selfish. Selfish Donna.
But maybe I do want to kill myself. Something that's sparked inside me, tearing me up, wearing my insides away or something. Some thoughts that are like flies to garbage, that's inside me, using my insides as the garbage.
I put the water down, and as soon as I can wipe the condensation from my hands, I get a dizzy spell..a strong pounding above my eyes. Those pills. Those damn pills.
It brings me to my knees, as I kneel on the floor. I put my hand on my forehead, clinching it, and massaging it trying to ease it.
This is what you wanted, Donna. You wanted to hurt yourself! I told myself, sighing with the pain.
I stand up. Oh screw it. And I sit on the edge of my bed. A cold sweat forms on my forehead, and I roll my eyes.
After a couple of minutes sitting there, by myself (As always) I hear a knock on my bedroom door.
"Yeah?" I yell, cooly not even acting like I'm up to anything, just being my normal self. I threw the pills under my bed quickly, as they rattled in the bottle, spilling out all over the floor. "Shit." I mumbled under my breath.
"It's me!" I recognized the cheerful voice. Eric. He opened the door, and came over to my bed, sat next to me, and kissed me on the forehead. "Oh my God, I had the best day." He said, doing his little stare thing, where he just looks out into his own little world. He started talking. About something. Just his little mindless great life. Five minutes seemed to pass, just him talking. I was hearing him, then he was going out of range, he just sounded, and looked blurry to me...
"Don't that just rock though? I mean who knew!?" Eric said, enthusiastically.
"Yeah. Yay!" I said, acting all happy. How I was at one time. How I remembered myself, in the past. How I wished I could be again--happy. I remembered when Eric's little random stories would intrigue me. I would love it. I would love him. I guess I do love him, but I feel no love in my heart. It's cold, like stone.
I winced, slightly. Feeling another sharp ass pain in my head. My heart was racing, and the icy sweat still drenched my forehead.
"Donna? You ok, baby?" Eric asked, looking confused.
"Yeah.." I say, but I feel a tightening in my chest all of the sudden, finding it hard to breathe. Breaking into a coughing fit, it burning me. But I didn't care.
"Donna?" I look at him, looking at me concerningly. Wondering what he was thinking.
A tear streaked down my face.
"Do I need to call an ambulance or something?"
"No..Er-" The words wouldn't come out. "I'm fin-" Coughing again.
"What?"
"I'm FINE!!!" I snap, burying my head underneth a pillow nearby. Eric moved closer to me, obviously concerned, as I hit him off.
Then that's when he saw it. He found the trail of pills leading out from under my bed, that had spilled earlier.
"Donna, what's this?" He said, digging out the bottle. "Aspirin? Donna what are you doing?"
Aspirin wasn't all I've been taking. I've took everything. I've took things I've found, I've took prescription pills I've bummed off of the pharmacist at the local pharmacy. He'd always been one of my friends. Told me they were 'happy pills' and I believed him, so I've took those also. Don't know what they were, and I know he'd get fired if they knew he gave me those, but I didn't give a damn. He's always been a little shit head, anyway. In a good way of course, thank you.
"I had a migrane, and I took one. They spilled out, it's nothing Eric...Since when'd you get so paranoid?"
He sighed, thinking about it. "Oh." He said, obliviously. "Well, I'll go if you want me to."
"Okay." I said, a blank expression on my face. "I'm sorry..."
"Don't worry about it." He kissed me again, as I stood, and fell dizzily into his arms, him catching me. "Donna, how many of those did you take?" He said looking at me furrowing his brow, as he grabbed my arms, and helped me stand steadily.
"ERIC! God damnit, I took TWO." I rolled my eyes, as I sat down. "Migranes tend to make you a little...tipsy." I said, sighing. "I just don't feel good, okay?"
He scanned me suspiciously. "Okay. Ok.." Eric walked towards the door, as he helped me get into bed safely, making sure I wouldn't fall or any of that shit.
"I love you. Call me when you feel better."
"Ok..Eric, I'm sorry I snapped like that."
"Feel better..." He said, and with that he closed the door, softly.
I grabbed my old stuffed animal that I'd had since I was a kid. I squeezed it, as I began to cry, my tears drenching it, hurting me...
How I wished I could be myself again. Although, I liked how I was now. In an odd way, I liked feeling like this. Didn't I?
I can remember
The very first time I cried
How I wiped my eyes
And buried the pain inside
All of my memories
Good and bad that's passed
Didn't even take the time to realize
Staring at the cracks in the walls
'Cause I'm waiting for it all to come to an end
Still I curl up right under the bed
'Cause it's takin' over my head
All over again...
Disclaimer- I do not own Donna, Eric or any other characters from that 70's show (but damn that'd be awesome. lol) I also do not own the song "Lonley Girl". It belongs to the very talented artist known as Pink. :)
--------------------------------------
:.chapter 1.:
Oh God. Oh God. I don't know why I have these thoughts. I'm just normal, right? I'm a normal person. I've never really had thoughts like this.
I've had a good life, nothing too traumatic's happened. I mean, the stuff with my mom of course, but it wasn't anything serious. It's not like she was dying. Ya know?
I push the pill to the back of my throat, get a bottle of water, and take it down. Taking more, one after the other, until I'd took almost seven. Intentionally, of course. I'm doing this, everytime I do this, I take one more, gradually killing myself.
It's not that I want to kill myself. I just want to hurt myself, shake things up a little, just get attention, really. I'm being selfish. Selfish Donna.
But maybe I do want to kill myself. Something that's sparked inside me, tearing me up, wearing my insides away or something. Some thoughts that are like flies to garbage, that's inside me, using my insides as the garbage.
I put the water down, and as soon as I can wipe the condensation from my hands, I get a dizzy spell..a strong pounding above my eyes. Those pills. Those damn pills.
It brings me to my knees, as I kneel on the floor. I put my hand on my forehead, clinching it, and massaging it trying to ease it.
This is what you wanted, Donna. You wanted to hurt yourself! I told myself, sighing with the pain.
I stand up. Oh screw it. And I sit on the edge of my bed. A cold sweat forms on my forehead, and I roll my eyes.
After a couple of minutes sitting there, by myself (As always) I hear a knock on my bedroom door.
"Yeah?" I yell, cooly not even acting like I'm up to anything, just being my normal self. I threw the pills under my bed quickly, as they rattled in the bottle, spilling out all over the floor. "Shit." I mumbled under my breath.
"It's me!" I recognized the cheerful voice. Eric. He opened the door, and came over to my bed, sat next to me, and kissed me on the forehead. "Oh my God, I had the best day." He said, doing his little stare thing, where he just looks out into his own little world. He started talking. About something. Just his little mindless great life. Five minutes seemed to pass, just him talking. I was hearing him, then he was going out of range, he just sounded, and looked blurry to me...
"Don't that just rock though? I mean who knew!?" Eric said, enthusiastically.
"Yeah. Yay!" I said, acting all happy. How I was at one time. How I remembered myself, in the past. How I wished I could be again--happy. I remembered when Eric's little random stories would intrigue me. I would love it. I would love him. I guess I do love him, but I feel no love in my heart. It's cold, like stone.
I winced, slightly. Feeling another sharp ass pain in my head. My heart was racing, and the icy sweat still drenched my forehead.
"Donna? You ok, baby?" Eric asked, looking confused.
"Yeah.." I say, but I feel a tightening in my chest all of the sudden, finding it hard to breathe. Breaking into a coughing fit, it burning me. But I didn't care.
"Donna?" I look at him, looking at me concerningly. Wondering what he was thinking.
A tear streaked down my face.
"Do I need to call an ambulance or something?"
"No..Er-" The words wouldn't come out. "I'm fin-" Coughing again.
"What?"
"I'm FINE!!!" I snap, burying my head underneth a pillow nearby. Eric moved closer to me, obviously concerned, as I hit him off.
Then that's when he saw it. He found the trail of pills leading out from under my bed, that had spilled earlier.
"Donna, what's this?" He said, digging out the bottle. "Aspirin? Donna what are you doing?"
Aspirin wasn't all I've been taking. I've took everything. I've took things I've found, I've took prescription pills I've bummed off of the pharmacist at the local pharmacy. He'd always been one of my friends. Told me they were 'happy pills' and I believed him, so I've took those also. Don't know what they were, and I know he'd get fired if they knew he gave me those, but I didn't give a damn. He's always been a little shit head, anyway. In a good way of course, thank you.
"I had a migrane, and I took one. They spilled out, it's nothing Eric...Since when'd you get so paranoid?"
He sighed, thinking about it. "Oh." He said, obliviously. "Well, I'll go if you want me to."
"Okay." I said, a blank expression on my face. "I'm sorry..."
"Don't worry about it." He kissed me again, as I stood, and fell dizzily into his arms, him catching me. "Donna, how many of those did you take?" He said looking at me furrowing his brow, as he grabbed my arms, and helped me stand steadily.
"ERIC! God damnit, I took TWO." I rolled my eyes, as I sat down. "Migranes tend to make you a little...tipsy." I said, sighing. "I just don't feel good, okay?"
He scanned me suspiciously. "Okay. Ok.." Eric walked towards the door, as he helped me get into bed safely, making sure I wouldn't fall or any of that shit.
"I love you. Call me when you feel better."
"Ok..Eric, I'm sorry I snapped like that."
"Feel better..." He said, and with that he closed the door, softly.
I grabbed my old stuffed animal that I'd had since I was a kid. I squeezed it, as I began to cry, my tears drenching it, hurting me...
How I wished I could be myself again. Although, I liked how I was now. In an odd way, I liked feeling like this. Didn't I?
I can remember
The very first time I cried
How I wiped my eyes
And buried the pain inside
All of my memories
Good and bad that's passed
Didn't even take the time to realize
Staring at the cracks in the walls
'Cause I'm waiting for it all to come to an end
Still I curl up right under the bed
'Cause it's takin' over my head
All over again...