Reading of Despair
4starfox
Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT in anyway, shape, or form.
Chapter one: Wheel of fortune
It was a cool, late night at the Son residence and all was silent and calm. The humble, dome shaped cottage sat in the middle of the woods, basking in the star light above. However, no matter how calm it seemed on the outside, it most certainly wasn't calm on the inside. Small sniffling sounds could be heard inside the bedroom of eleven year old Son Gohan. Gohan was the child of the former world martial arts champion Son Goku. Recently Gohan, Goku, and the Z fighters all participated in a tournament set up by an evil android by the name of Cell. This tournament was to determine the fate of planet Earth and Goku had fought the monster valiantly only to come to realize that he did not possess the power to defeat him for good.
He withdrew from the fight in order to send his son out to fight Cell and finish him for good. Things took a dramatic change for the worse as Gohan's hidden power surfaced and he began to prolong the fight with Cell. When this happened, Cell came to the conclusion that he was not going to defeat Gohan, so he charged himself up to blow up the entire planet. Just when all hope was lost, Goku stepped in and used his instant transmission to relocate Cell off the planet; the end result being Goku's death on King Kai's planet when Cell detonated. For a moment everyone had thought Cell was finished, but he reappeared in front of them plain as day stronger than ever. In the end, with the help of the Z fighters, Gohan defeated Cell in their huge Kamehameha showdown. Everyone rejoiced as Gohan came out victorious, but they had no idea about the unpredictability of the next situation.
Everyone gathered on top of Kami's look out along with the Dragon balls to wish back all the people Cell had mercilessly killed. However a shocking revelation was made by Goku. Using King Kai's telepathic abilities to communicate with everyone from Otherworld, he clearly stated that he did not want to be wished back; he believed that every enemy they had fought so far was after him. So, he decided that Earth would be safer if he stayed deceased. Gohan was in a state of shock as he tried to reason with Goku, but it was no use; Goku's decision still stayed as he gave a goodbye to his son and his friends. That was two weeks ago.
Gohan often thought about his father's decision at night when he was alone in his room. He had cried himself to sleep for those past two weeks just like his mother, Son Chichi, did. He knew because she fell asleep earlier than he did. However, the silence still upset Gohan the most because to him, it screamed the truth. His emotions ran out of control on the inside like a violent storm at sea. He felt like there was a hole in his heart that throbbed painfully each time he thought of it. Sometimes the pain was almost too much to bare. He turned to lay on his left side on the bed as he let out another heart retching cry in the pillow he was holding to his face.
He couldn't believe his father had done that. The threat was gone, he made sure of that.
"So why not come back? Not all the adversaries we've faced were looking for him. Some of them we walked into. Sure, Raditz and Doctor Gero were out to get him, but the point is he could've come back. There was no reason to stay gone. Especially since mom and I still need him." Gohan thought.
Gohan once again let his mind wander in an attempt to ease his pain. Unfortunately, it didn't do him any good. His soul still bled a red, hot pain inside his mind. He didn't know what else he could do since he had already talked to Piccolo earlier that day about this issue. He rolled over in his bed again only to stare at the ceiling once again. Then his thoughts were taken to a friend of his that he had grown very close to over the years. Her name was Jasmine Vencent Redback; a forty-eight year old lycan woman that met him when he was a newborn.
Jasmine was a military woman. She was raised in a filthy ghetto town in the United states over run by crime. She was captured at the age of four from her foster home and taken overseas to fight in a war she knew nothing about. However, she didn't get to come home until she was six. Years later, she met the love of her life Charlie Harrison. Later in their engagement, he was killed in action causing Jasmine to drown her sorrows in alcohol. Her childhood friend David and her new friend Goku, who she had met at the last year of her alcoholism, grew concerned and sent her to rehab. She came out and visited Goku to tell him she cleaned herself up only to see that he was married and had Gohan.
And that is where it all started; she loved the boy like her own child. Of course she loved children in general; due to a combat wound she sustained at the moment of her beloved's death she could no longer bare children of her own. Jasmine hadn't wanted much out of life except to become a mother. Gohan guessed that she had formed a special bond with him because she couldn't have kids of her own. He believed that he somehow filled the void in her empty heart and it made him realize why she loved him so much. One of Jasmine's main talents was straightening out all the craziness in people's personal lives. She was famous among the Z fighters for her "Act like you have some damn sense" speeches.
In fact, that was the reason why people always came to her for advice for personal problems. Rather, if it was marital issues, kids acting up, bad parents, or romance she was the "go to" person for the job. Then the thought hit Gohan like a ton of cinder blocks.
"That's it! I'll just go see Aunt Jaz tomorrow and ask her for some advice. She always knows what to do!" Gohan thought as he turned back over on his side.
With his mind made up, he closed his weary eyes and went into a peaceful slumber.
That morning, Gohan had woken up to the smell of breakfast; however, this didn't brighten his gloomy mood. The truth was that he felt like death warmed over; his stomach and chest hurt like hell and he felt weak. For the past week he had felt this way. He didn't think much of it because he thought it was just stress. He crawled out of bed at a snails pace and let out a sleepy and painful groan. His joints and muscles ached something fierce as he made his way to the kitchen.
"God, I do not feel like eating. I don't want to throw up again!" Gohan mentally complained as he took his seat at the kitchen table.
Every morning Chichi would have breakfast on the table for Gohan and Goku; normally she'd have to get up early to fix breakfast because of their saiyan appetites. Since Goku was no longer there, she was cooking less which made the dark cloud of depression over her head return. It was Gohan she worried about the most, for he wasn't eating as much as he usually did and he had been vomiting a lot lately. She too, just like Gohan, thought it was depression causing it and kept an eye on him just in case. Then again, his appearance for the past five days concerned her though; it just wasn't like him at all.
His hair was normally neatly groomed, but now it was a frizzy mess on top of his head. He had also been in the same clothes for those five days and, if she wasn't mistaken, he smelt like he hadn't bathed in that time frame either. She worried about him complaining of stomach and chest pains, but dismissed it as depression. She hoped it would all pass as she served his breakfast; watching as he ate with less enthusiasm like he used to. Chichi felt lost, she didn't know what to say to make him feel better. Then an idea popped in her head.
"Hey, Gohan?"
"Yeah mom?" Gohan answered as he finished his small meal.
"I was thinking…How would you feel if I told you I'm letting you graduate early so you can enjoy the rest of your childhood?" Chichi asked, hoping to spark his interest.
At first Gohan was stunned, education was always a big deal to his mother. He couldn't believe his ears when she asked that question. It was like a miracle in his eyes; he always wanted to pick his own future career but he only studied as hard as he did to keep her happy. He decided to seize the moment.
"Really? That'd be great! I would love to!" Gohan exclaimed excitedly.
"The reason I thought of this idea was…" She had paused trying to compose herself.
"What's wrong mom? You look upset." No longer had Gohan asked that question that Chichi began to cry.
"Oh Gohan honey! When I saw you fighting that monster in Baba's crystal ball, it made me realize how much I held you back in life!" She sobbed.
Gohan was puzzled by this new revelation as he decided to probe for more answers.
"What for? I don't get it."
"It's just that... when I saw you fighting, I thought I've held you back so much that what if you died out there like your father. You wouldn't have much to look back on in your life. I never let you be a normal child! You should've been out making friends, and forming new hobbies like other kids do. I didn't let you live; you're supposed to learn about life and experience it, not watching it pass you by. That's why I found an early graduation program for gifted students so you could graduate early in order to enjoy what's left of your childhood before you have adult responsibilities. I'm sorry for sheltering you so much." Chichi rambled on hysterically.
"Mom, I've never held it against you at all. But yes I would love that. Thank you!" Gohan cheered as he rose from his chair and hugged his mom.
Chichi returned the embrace as she cleared her throat and whispered "You're welcome."
Gohan felt hopeless. He didn't know what else to do other than hold and comfort his mother. A hateful thought wormed it's way into his mind.
"Damn it dad! What the hell is wrong with you? Mom has done nothing but love and take care of you and you abandon her like this?" As soon as the thought entered his mind it lingered for a moment until the question he wanted to ask his mother appeared into his mind.
"Hey mom?"
"Yes honey?" Chichi sniffled as she wiped her tears away.
"Can I visit Aunt Jaz today? I haven't seen her in a while."
"Sure, but be back before dinner at six okay?" She smiled.
"Okay, thanks mom." Gohan embraced her once again.
"Oh, and one more thing Gohan." Chichi announced.
"Yeah, what is it?" Gohan asked pulling away from her.
"Take a shower and change please? You let yourself go."
"Oh, I guess it has been a while huh? Okay, see you at dinner!" Gohan said after looking down at himself.
So with that in mind, Gohan trotted happily to the bathroom to take his shower.
Once Gohan entered the bathroom, he began stripping out of his pajamas. He then tossed them into the dirty laundry hamper as he caught an image of his naked body in the long mirror tacked up on the inside of the bathroom door. He turned to face his reflection only to see that he, indeed, looked as bad as he felt. His cheeks, eyes, and stomach looked a little sunken in. He noticed that he still had all his muscle tone and definition from training in the hyperbolic time chamber. This didn't cheer him up as he also saw how pale his complexion was. His gaze traveled down to his male parts and he kind of chuckled at a thought that entered his brain.
"Well, at least my penis still looks normal." Gohan chuckled as he climbed into the shower to bathe.
He turned the water on and stood in its cascading fall for a few moments. The water's comforting effects didn't last long as another fresh batch of tears fell from his coal black eyes.
"Why me?" He thought as he wept in the shower.
Gohan's shower ended longer than expected. He finished combing his hair and left the bathroom. Passing by the living room, he saw his mother as she was sitting on the love seat knitting and watching a popular crochet and knitting show. Then, as he came to the door, he said good bye to his mother and left for Jasmine's house.
R&R
I hope you like Schubskie!
Hey guys! I'm Rayvenwolf, a long time friend of 4starfox. She's asked me to look over her story and edit what needs to be edited. If I missed anything or you catch that I edited it wrong, please let me know and I'll fix it ASAP. When I edit these, I'm probably running low on energy, lol :)