Disclaimer: Full Metal Panic does not belong to me.

A/N: This is the shortest thing I ever wrote and it deals with the part when Leonard tells Kanami that he investigated Souske and gives her a number of people he had killed. I think it's pretty wrong. If a special operations soldier in Iraq can push about 500 kills during a 12 month deployment (that includes air-strikes, machine guns, sniper fire, missions and everything like that) then a person fighting all his life and using technology like AS should definitely have a little bit more of a record lol

This is also partially based on an individual I know... I really hope that he doesn't EVER see this story.

It was bugging me so I wrote it. Hopefully, it will help me update my other stories faster too.

Just a job

"So, how many was it?" Kaname asked. She couldn't stop herself from asking even though she really did not want to know.

"I don't know"

"Leonard said that the number is close to a hundred," Kaname continued, "Did he tell the truth?"

"No," at Souske's response Kaname was finally able to release the breath she didn't know she was holding. "Tell me," for her own peace of mind she wanted verbal confirmation.

"I can only estimate," Souske was very through with his answer, "Air strikes I called in, explosions caused directly by me and all the collateral damage and villages caught in the crossfire during fighting – estimated casualties would be several thousand. People that were killed by me, without my team's participation and without any doubt that they were my kills – estimated number would be close to a thousand. As for the people my team killed – I'm sorry but I am unable to estimate the number."

"It is very difficult to confirm things like this sometimes, especially during intense fire-fights. During the fight, when a large amount of ammunition is expended by each person on the team it is difficult to tell who eliminated whom."

"It is different for every soldier," his face betrayed nothing of Souske's thoughts, "I have been fighting for a very long time, Chidori."

This was not the answer Kaname expected.

"You don't even know the exact numbers, do you?"

"Negative."

"How can you not remember?" she fought hard against the tears that threatened to show. She didn't even know who she was trying not to cry for – all the lost lives or Souske.

"You remember only the first ten or so kills," he was blunt and honest with his answers, as usual, "after that you don't think of them as people and you just work to improve your skills."

"It's a hard burden to carry," it was difficult not to condemn the man she loved so much.

"No, it's not," war changes people and Souske wasn't any different. Chidori did not know what to say, how to respond. She wanted to comfort him but even if she was brave enough to attempt it he did not look like he needed any comfort. And then after a long silence Souske continued, "At first, you hate yourself for not caring, but then you get used to it."

There ware so many things Chidori could tell him but non of them sounded right so she stayed silent.

"It's a job."