I realise that this could go very horribly and I really have no idea why I'm uploading it but recently I've been having such Hanschen/Ernst feelsies and I felt the desire to write this awful representation of their characters. I'll probably write about 4 or possibly 5 one shot style pieces and they're all pre- Spring Awakening.
Please review if you've had a read! Opinions of any form make me happy :-)
Ernst was a shy boy. Introverted and still very much a child amongst the group of radicals he associated himself with.
Melchior, well, Melchior spoke for himself in his own sinful dialogue. He was an atheist, word had been told. Personally Ernst was in awe of his sheer audacity and longed for such a confident streak.
"And, better yet, I'll never touch her like they did", he had claimed proudly, in a conversation concerning the woman he planned to marry and make a livelihood with. He was yet to settle on an identity for her, but it all seemed so natural and effortless. There was no need for security, "We'll run off into the haze and have no need for a house of children and live the lives we always dreamt of."
"And what of me?" Moritz Steifel had begged in earnest admiration, "What will I make of myself, Melchi?"
Moritz, like Ernst, had a playful heart, and was troubled by lingering thoughts that began as one thing and trailed onto something entirely different. They quietly compensated on that level.
"As for you, happily married, with a little girl and perhaps a little boy too, one after the other", he had reassured him, and Moritz had smiled the brightest smile.
"I, I shall be a scholar, with a sharp wardrobe and a girl who will dote on me", Georg had boasted, nudging Ernst in the ribs as he drew back into his own, skinny stance a little, "I'll reward her with bouncing baby boys and bring them up myself; they shall need no teacher. She will serve their health with plentiful thin-crust pies, with fillings from rhubarb and custard to pork and apple."
"Don't make me laugh, Georg", Hanschen had snorted, sitting a little further away from where the boys had pooled in the centre of the woodland opening, "As if any young lady would dote on you when we all stand aware of your preference for the older woman. As they progress in age, the pies grow smaller and drier, haven't you heard?"
"Don't be ridiculous", Georg had argued, but Hanschen had pressed the matter no further and returned to inspecting his fingernails with tight lips.
Otto, a boy of few words, was the reason for his own inclusion, to bitter regret, "What about you, Ernst? You are awfully quiet. Who shall you live to be?"
"..A country pastor", Ernst had sniffed and faked a hint of dreaminess, as if he really longed for this reality, "I'd watch the boys and girls who lived in the village grow up and live their own lives. M-married. Yes, that seems quite fitting."
Hanschen's eyes had flickered, and Ernst had desperately ignored him, although his cheeks had flushed uncomfortably.
"You're all so cute", he had uttered at them from his spot against the base of the tree, "Getting all carried away before you've even finished your exams. Perhaps you should stop fretting over the future and focus your wistful daydreams on the now."
"Ah, Hanschen, now where's your sense of adventure?" Melchior had grinned, getting up broadly and collecting his books- Latin, world Geography, and a maths text book.
"Perhaps it ran off hand in hand with your sense of realism", he replied with a wry smile, crossing his legs once, twice, before standing up also and stretching, "They'd make quite the couple."
"Quite."
The boys began to issue midday farewells and split away from the small, dimly lit opening, leaving Ernst to get on his knees on the forest floor and stack up his papers before the ever-drawing breeze washed them away. His friends departed one by one- first Otto, and then Melchior with Moritz, and then Georg, leaving Hanschen nothing more than a wallflower standing beside the heavy oak he had adopted as his own. He offered Ernst a dry smirk, an expression too confident for a boy of 14, and a rather sanctimonious boy at that- although, this had fallen a little flat with the younger, more thickly haired of the two. Hanschen had never been cruel, he had never been malicious, and not so much righteous, only knowing, as if he had the foreshadow of the new year already mapped out in his head. Every inward glance only made Ernst more anxious, and Hanschen knew of this very well.
"A country pastor," he had repeated softly as Ernst had finished shuffling his essays into a pile- they now resided under his slight armpit. Glancing back with certain caution, he did not speak, only stared on at the strange, mousse haired boy who was eyeing him over beside the tree trunk.
"Funny," he continued, his voice nothing more than a gentle muse, "But Ernst, I ask you this, why herd sheep when you could be herding dragons?"
"You can't herd dragons, Hanschen. They don't exist."
"That's what they tell us, isn't it?" was his part lipped reply, his fingers drumming elegantly against the oak bark, "That we can't do things. Not that it's wrong, no, they would never say that, but that it just doesn't exist. However, do correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm quite sure that if we had a long stick, a field and a small dragon with only smoke and fumes to offer us, we could in fact herd it."
"I don't.. understand," the young boy struggled.
"The world is an odd place, Ernst. We accept the reality that is thrust upon us," Hanschen resumed, sliding his back down to the base of the tree and sitting there calmly, "I challenge Melchior to see if he has it in him, to speak out. If only we all had that quality."
"I.. yes. I think I best be going home, Hanschen."
He nodded, the odd smile returning, "Forgive me, I'm rambling. I think I'll stay here for a while. Be off with you."
And so, Ernst turned on his heel, and left.
Eek. Part 2 coming up in.. a few days, perhaps? Anyways. Eek. Drop me a review if you had any opinions on part one? Muchos gracias.
Littleink. Xx