Even though I didn't want to appear weak and/or emotional in front of Jacob, I just couldn't help it. I cried. I turned around and braced myself on the arm of the couch. I think I was only like that for a minute or so when I felt an unusually warm hand on my shoulder. I tried to shrug it off, but it didn't work. And then another hand was on my other shoulder. Before I knew it, Jacob had spun me around and pulled me into his arms. I tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let me. It felt strange to have his arms around me, but I stopped protesting after I realized he wasn't letting go. It was then that I realized that, although he smelled horrid and his temperature was a little too warm for my taste, his embrace was strangely comforting. I relaxed and cried for a minute more. Then I felt him lightly patting my back with one of his hands. It was hard to believe that Jacob of all people was comforting me. I was surprised. Since when did he care about me? Maybe he was just a sucker for a crying girl, some guys were like that. Even with my apparent lack of tears, he could still tell I was upset and crying. After a few more minutes I had calmed down considerably. If I had been alone I probably would have continued crying for a while, but it had only been about ten minutes or so. He let go after a minute more, and I pulled away. I had to ask. I wasn't sure how this event had affected our relationship. I looked up at him. Geez, he was so tall. "What did you do that for?" I asked. He shrugged his shoulders. "You seemed like you needed a hug." He smiled at me. He smiled. I couldn't help it, I smiled back. "So, are we, like, friends now, or something?" I asked. I had to know. I didn't think I could pretend this didn't happen. I'd never been much of a liar. And that gesture had been a little too friendly for us to go on acting like we still hated each other. Did I ever really hate him? Suddenly I wasn't so sure. Disliked him, sure. But hate him? Never. My musing took place in the few seconds before he could respond to my question. "I don't know." He said. "Do you still hate me?" This was it. I had to tell him what I'd just thought. "I never hated you." I said. "We never really got along, but I've found that I generally don't get along with people that I don't know that well. We never got to know each other. Me and Esme butted heads a lot until I got to know her, same thing with Alice, and Bella, and every other person in this family." From the look on his face, I realized I had to rethink what I just said. But he didn't give me the chance. He said the exact words I'd just thought. "Since when have you considered me a member of the family?" I had to get out of this. I don't think I really meant it like that. Or did I? I wasn't sure. "Well, you're Nessie's imprint, and you're always here and..." I trailed off. "Uh-uh." He scolded. "You said it, you can't take it back." "I didn't mean it like that." I argued. "Mm-mm. You already said it." I wasn't going to win this one, but I kept trying. "That's really not what I meant." "Nope, you already said it." I switched tactics, hoping to save myself from admitting it. "It doesn't mean anything." Unfortunately, he mistook my new tactic as a confession to what I'd thought but hadn't actually said. "You like me." I looked away. Anyone else would have mistaken that as something else, but I knew what he meant. He didn't mean that I liked him like I wanted what he and Nessie have, or rather what they will have, he meant that I liked him rather than disliked him. Which, I had to admit it, at least to myself, was true. He put his hand on my shoulder again, but instead of pulling me in for another hug, he simply rubbed his fingers up and down my arm. He was comforting me again. It was strange.
(later on)
I was walking back to the house after my need for fresh air led me outside when I passed Bella, probably heading back after hunting. We talked for a few minutes. I was hoping that she didn't notice that my clothes smelled like her favorite werewolf, but she eventually did. She walked closer and sniffed my shirt, my jacket, my hair. Then she realized. "Rose, why do you smell like werewolf?" I had to lie. Or, at least try to lie. I didn't want her to know. I didn't particularly want anyone to know. "I don't." I said. "He was probably just here." The look on her face said she didn't buy it. I didn't care. "I'm going back to the house. I want to change and go hunting." She gave me a look, but didn't argue as she turned and headed back for the house. She didn't debate me, or ask to come along. I always went hunting alone. Everyone knew that. And then I started to debate in my head how much detergent I would need to get the smell out of my clothes, if I could even get it out with one wash at all. It might not come out. I hoped it would come out of my hair.