A/N: Ok…this was first posted in late May of 2001. I just read it a few days ago, and decided it needed some major grammatical adjustments and a couple sentence re-structures. Plus, I'll get more reviews after it's passed over the first page of HP stories again. Not to mention I have a beautiful eMachine computer now and italics will copy since I can save as HTML! Yay!!! And just so you know…I personally think this is weird and pathetic. But does anyone else?!?!

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Harry Potter and the Normal Year
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Harry, Ron, and Hermione were walking down to the Great Hall one day. It was late April, and Ron brought something up…

"Hey, you guys, I just thought of something."

"What's that, Ron?" asked Hermione.

"Think about it....not one evil or weird thing has happened to us all year!!"

Harry responded with,

"Hey, he's right! I mean, come on: 1st year, all that Philosopher's Stone crap. 2nd year, all that Tom Riddle/Chamber-thingy crap. 3rd year, the return of Sirius. 4th year, Triwizard Tournament. I mean, it IS really weird!"

"Well," said Hermione, "it's only April. There's still hope."

"Hope?!?" exclaimed Ron. "This is great! No giant chess boards, no saving Ginny, no Scabbers-getting-turned-into-a-person, and no Harry-getting-tired-and-going-to-sleep-in-the-hospital-wing-after-seeing-his-parents-float-out-of-You-Know-Who's-wand! This is great!"

"Hey, Hermione, you've gotta admit it!" said Harry.

"I guess you're right. But there's a pattern, don't you think? I mean, every year, You-Know-Who has come back. What makes you think he wouldn't try to kill Harry again? For one last try? He doesn't give up all that easy…"

"Not to mention we actually have a normal DADA teacher this year," Ron said, ignoring her, "who's actually staying for more than one term."

"Oh, Ron," said Harry, "you're just happy because it isn't Lockhart."

"Exactly!" Ron said.

"Wow! Well, maybe the rest of my years at Hogwarts WILL go smoothly!" said Hermi. The kids grinned and continued walking.

Suddenly, Voldie dropped out of the sky in front of them.

"Well," said Voldie. "I couldn't help but overhear your conversation! Yes, quite a disgrace....I didn't try and kill Harry Potter this year....after I tried all those other times....well, too bad you brought it up, Mr. Weasley, because it just gave me an idea!" Voldie pulled out his wand. "AVADA KEDRAVA!!!!!!!"

Harry died.

"Once again," said Voldie, "thanks, Ron! What a good observation of yours!" Then he skipped off, singing "Zip-a-dee-doo-dah."

"FUCK YOU RON!!!!!!"

*J.K. Rowling is happy this was written because now she doesn't have to spend the rest of her life writing books 6 and 7.*

THE END!


A/N: Ok this was stupid but I'M ACTUALLY LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!