I wonder if I should be ashamed that I rather like 'It wasn't me' by
Shaggy/Rik Rok... In any case, here is a song to the same tune, in
which Fudge has decided to deny that Voldemort ever existed...
Dumbledore: Now Fudge…
Fudge: You!
D: Listen to me.
F: What do you mean, man?
D: We all just saw him.
F: You say you saw who?
D: Voldemort – you let this happen.
F: How?
D: With all those things you do.
F: It can't have been him
D: Really?
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
How could you forget that he had
Sought out a prophecy?
All this time he had wanted it
He never knew the mystery
Fudge:
We'd never grant the wizard access to our knowledge
You trespass and your witnessing I never would acknowledge
You better have something backing up the things you allege
You-know-who has not returned so run back to your college
Telling us a story – you sure know how to lie
Saying that he's here, your stories I deny
I don't believe a word of the things that you imply
And you tell us he's nearby!
D: Yet we saw him by the fountain
F: It wasn't him
D: Heard the curse he was shouting
F: It wasn't him
D: He gave a Death Eaters' outing
F: It wasn't him
D: I can't believe you're still doubting!
F: It wasn't him
D: Harry saw in the manor
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him rise in the graveyard
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him using his viper
F: It wasn't him
D: Do you still believe Rita?
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
I had tried to warn you
He would come here on just a whim
Do they still believe you
When you whimper "It wasn't him"?
F: Dumbledore, it's not true, I must laugh in your face
However could the Dark Lord find his way into this place
As funny as it seems to you, it's a wild goose chase
And a memory's so easy to erase
You have made us worry of those things dead in the past
Lying rumour-monger, your stories will not last
This is my answer, don't you dare…
I'll call the Aurors so you had better change fast
D: Yet we saw him by the fountain
F: It wasn't him
D: Heard the curse he was shouting
F: It wasn't him
D: He gave a Death Eaters' outing
F: It wasn't him
D: I can't believe you're still doubting!
F: It wasn't him
D: Harry saw in the manor
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him rise in the graveyard
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him using his viper
F: It wasn't him
D: Do you still believe Rita?
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
How could you forget that he had
Sought out a prophecy?
All this time he had wanted it
He never knew the mystery
Here are people from the Prophet
Who have witnessed it all
We've all listened to your pleading
You make no sense at all
They are writing up the story
And it's sure to appall
You had thought the people loved you
But your bluff they will call
And so I sing
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
How could you forget that he had
Sought out a prophecy?
All this time he had wanted it
He never knew the mystery
Hehe. Please review.
Dumbledore: Now Fudge…
Fudge: You!
D: Listen to me.
F: What do you mean, man?
D: We all just saw him.
F: You say you saw who?
D: Voldemort – you let this happen.
F: How?
D: With all those things you do.
F: It can't have been him
D: Really?
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
How could you forget that he had
Sought out a prophecy?
All this time he had wanted it
He never knew the mystery
Fudge:
We'd never grant the wizard access to our knowledge
You trespass and your witnessing I never would acknowledge
You better have something backing up the things you allege
You-know-who has not returned so run back to your college
Telling us a story – you sure know how to lie
Saying that he's here, your stories I deny
I don't believe a word of the things that you imply
And you tell us he's nearby!
D: Yet we saw him by the fountain
F: It wasn't him
D: Heard the curse he was shouting
F: It wasn't him
D: He gave a Death Eaters' outing
F: It wasn't him
D: I can't believe you're still doubting!
F: It wasn't him
D: Harry saw in the manor
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him rise in the graveyard
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him using his viper
F: It wasn't him
D: Do you still believe Rita?
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
I had tried to warn you
He would come here on just a whim
Do they still believe you
When you whimper "It wasn't him"?
F: Dumbledore, it's not true, I must laugh in your face
However could the Dark Lord find his way into this place
As funny as it seems to you, it's a wild goose chase
And a memory's so easy to erase
You have made us worry of those things dead in the past
Lying rumour-monger, your stories will not last
This is my answer, don't you dare…
I'll call the Aurors so you had better change fast
D: Yet we saw him by the fountain
F: It wasn't him
D: Heard the curse he was shouting
F: It wasn't him
D: He gave a Death Eaters' outing
F: It wasn't him
D: I can't believe you're still doubting!
F: It wasn't him
D: Harry saw in the manor
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him rise in the graveyard
F: It wasn't him
D: Saw him using his viper
F: It wasn't him
D: Do you still believe Rita?
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
How could you forget that he had
Sought out a prophecy?
All this time he had wanted it
He never knew the mystery
Here are people from the Prophet
Who have witnessed it all
We've all listened to your pleading
You make no sense at all
They are writing up the story
And it's sure to appall
You had thought the people loved you
But your bluff they will call
And so I sing
Voldemort's back and we saw him in person
Cursing in the Ministry
Picture this, we were both here dueling
Fighting where you all could see
How could you forget that he had
Sought out a prophecy?
All this time he had wanted it
He never knew the mystery
Hehe. Please review.