25 Lesbian Short Stories That Came From My Insane Fanboy Mind
#19: Angel Jones (Fish Police)/Julie Bruin (Tiny Toons Adventures)
Remember when I said I had less excuses for a yuri couple? Yeah, here's one.
This two have near nothing in common, save for the fact they're both busty anthropomorphic gals. Well, and Warner Brothers have the rights for them. But that's it. One was featured on the greatest animated shows of all time, voiced by a jack of all trades. The other was featured on a literal clamshell of a show that the creator of the original comic doesn't like, whose voiced by a character from Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot.
…hey, did I mention that I'm INSANE?
Anyway, despite the complete split, let's give this a shot, eh?
Onwards!
The club, and the street it laid on, had seen better days. Once, a long time ago, children used to play here. Household names used to meet here for the excellent coffee in a cake shop known as Harold's. The president once came here to dig the first hole in the new playground. Hollywood made a blockbuster hit on this street.
Yet, that was years ago. Now, the once clean streets were now full of grim, both the physical kind and the metaphysical kind. It became a hiding spot for people with over a million dollars on their heads; from mobsters to murderers, the street went all to hell. Families escaped as soon as possible, cops kept their distance, and soon the entire block either became condemned or cheap adult attractions.
The Club Hermes was nothing special. By the far the best thing to be said about the club was their French fries, and even then the rumors persisted about the recipe being stolen from a chief found dead across the street. The food was bland, mood lightening was dull, the performers were trying too hard to be entertaining and sexy, thefts happened once a week…the list continued on to the point of being a bad running gag.
No wonder why it got the nickname of 'Club Deadbeat'.
Angel Jones' career was also nothing to write home about, but it was better than this. Yeah, her primary job before this was being a lead singer at a crime boss' club, but at least she was paid well and a cop boyfriend. Well, her cop boyfriend married an owner of a dinner after he finally busted the owner of the club, leaving her without a job and forcing her out of her own world to avoid being killed for turning state evidence, something she got roped into doing by her cop boyfriend.
Thanks for nothing.
Made her feel like a fish out of water. Speaking of which, she became that. As it turns out, she can live out of water in other worlds other than her own, and she walks by 'floating'. It felt weird to be on dry land, but at least she afforded a beach house in case she felt the need to take a dive. Because of her mermaid figure, many lecherous men approached her with many indecent proposals. She turned them down, but looking back…at least they were up front about it and offered her good money.
The owner of said club could rewrite the dictionary on the term 'fat bastard'. He would play 'hide-and-find-your-check' every week, make incredibly lame innuendos about every minute, blow smoke in her face…ugh, yet another running gag that was neither endearing nor funny. It was amazing that she continued to live a normal live.
Tonight was a night like the all others. She would arrive at 6 PM, put on her makeup, sing a couple of songs, take a request or two, and get the hell out of Dodge by 10.
Yet, someone with red-hair and a physique equal to her paid close attention to her the entire time.
She looked like a teddy bear. A teddy bear with a green dress, black shoes, and black gloves. With eyes the color of coal and the warmth of a fireplace. Her smile never left her face. She never once let her eyes sway away from the sight of the singing siren on the stage. When the waiter served her drink, she fumbled around for it, nearing spilling it in the process. She barely touched it during the entire performance.
Who was this person? Is she stalking me? Is she going to kidnap me? These were the three thoughts Angel had on her mind. A look of worry forced itself onto Angel's face during the performance. She decided to face the problem head on. As soon as her act concluded, she got her coat and approached the bear, whom also had the same idea.
"I see that you enjoy my performance." Angel started out kind, just to be safe. "Did you come for my autograph?"
"Yes, Ms. Jones!" The bear spoke with a slight valley girl accent. "I think you should go prime time!"
"Sorry, I'm good, but not great." Angel reached into her space between spaces and retrieved a pen. "Okay, where do I sign and sign it to?"
"Could you sign To Julie Bruin, Love Angel Jones here?"
"No."
"Oh. How about here?"
"No!"
"You're no fun. Well…"
"You got any paper?"
"No, I was hoping you sign my body."
"Don't you need to bathe?"
"…well…"
"Look." Angel stopped Julie. "You were watching me the entire time. I don't think…"
"Shh." Julie placed a finger on Angel's mouth. "I'll explain everything outside. I have a limo which will take you home." Julie removed her finger and firmly placed her hand in Angel's. "Come on. I mean you no harm. I only wish to take you out of harm's way."
Angel followed. Stranger danger was coming in full effect, yet this was turning into 'any port in a storm' kind of situation. A long storm that had been going on too damn long. As promised, a limo with a tall driver was waiting outside. He called over Ms. Bruin and let the two in, flashing a small smile at Angel. After the two got seated in the back, the driver took off, leaving behind the trashy street.
"Do you drink?" Asked Julie as she opened a ice chest and showed off three old bottles of fine wine dating back at least thirty years.
"Not that much, please." Angel replied, pointing to a light green bottle with a peacock print. Julie complied with a smile and poured a small amount into a shot-glass with a logo Angel was unfamiliar with. It looked a bit like Julie herself, dancing. Julie handed the glass over to Angel, who downed it in one gulp.
"Now, what's this about?" Angel asked.
"I would like to hire you for my club as the lead singer." Julie also reached into her space and retrieved a rather colorful and gaudy poster. Julie's logo was on each corner, just to make sure you didn't forget who owned the place. The club was named 'Just Say It!' and looked to be a rather obnoxious modern day club. Why would this club needed a smooth singer like her? She had no training as a DJ…
"…I know what you're thinking." Julie sounded all giddy. "I want to try something different for my club. I'm making money, but as a moneymaker, I need to make more. So I need to find out how to make more money. So hey, a mermaid that has a way with a ballad will literally raise the roof!" To demonstrate, she punched up into the air. "I can offer you…nearly anything you want!"
"How do you know I don't have everything?" Snarkly replied Angel.
"Cause I've seen your beach-house, and it's one wrong step away from falling apart." After saying that, Julie looked back at Angel. "Well, if you could step. I guess the correct term is one wrong bump." Julie shrugged. "Besides, your boss is currently under investigation for various crimes relating to the disappearing people around that horrid street."
"That figures." Angel sighed. "But really, what's stopping me from taking over the club and turning it into something great?"
"Besides being evidence in a police investigation?"
"Okay…what about getting a lawyer to seize property?"
"You're going to need a good one. I got this friend…"
"I don't need you." Angel spat out. "I survived a lot on my own. In fact, I'm doing fine. I don't need that dinky little house, I'm packing so I can move back into the water and stay there. You think a spoiled brat like yourself can help something like me? Huh?"
Julie started to tear up a bit.
"Don't cry on me, you jumped-up twit." Angel angrily got out. "I've dealt with your kind before and look where it got me."
"I just wanted to help you…"
"Oh, bull."
"You're mean."
"What you call mean, I call it survival." Angel got close to Julie. "And how can you insure that you intend to keep your promise? Can you help me in anyway that I can't do."
"I can…"
"…give me money? A home? A club in my own name? Big deal."
"…love you."
"…sorry, didn't catch that last bit. It sounded something insane."
"I think you're the most beautiful girl I ever seen." Julie embraced Angel's arm, holding it with a nice, firm grip and placing said arm in between Julie's fine breasts. "I want to hold you, love you…"
"I…" Angel was a loss for words. Being a homosexual relationship was something Angel actually considered for a while, during the time when she knew her former cop boyfriend's future wife. Plus, that was during the time where she would troll the media with whatever she could. And now it came back to bite her in the rear. This girl was offering a chance at a better life all for a relationship?
"I'm not interested, not gullible, and above all, I'm not overly fond of you." Angel replied. She sounded a bit more panicking.
"I can offer you my body…" Julie's voice trailed away as she pushed down the top part of her dress to show off more of her breasts, yet without displaying her nipples. "…I really want you…" She got on top on Angel, slowly. "…please, I'll do anything…" Her face got within kissing distance of Angel's face.
"Ms. Bruin." Angel spoke with a calm voice.
"Yes?"
"I just met you. Would you want a relationship with a complete stranger?" Asked Angel.
"…but I…"
"Shh." Angel now hushed Julie. "I think we should start as friends. And don't take this as a ban to the friend zone, let's take it nice and slow."
"So…" Julie's eyes sparkled. "…you will…"
"Eh, might as well." Angel kissed Julie's forehead. "Like I said, let's take it slow at first." Angel's smile grew. "Actually…" Angel started to kiss all around Julie's face, at the same time removing her gloves. "…I have been feeling a bit lonely…" With the gloves off, and Julie kicking off her shoes, all was left was Julie's dress and underwear, as well as Angel's 'clothes'. "…just this once…"
The driver kindly closed the soundproof window to let them have some privacy.
And so the mermaid went away from her dump of a street to a great shiny house on a pier to live with her new girlfriend. Many people would notice how well the two swam well together, as if they were dancing together…